Marykate was home last night and we went to Coffee &. It was fun, we talked her love life, sang songs, did dances, didn't get served forever at pano's. It was fun. Woohoo for one night visits.

It's not about what you should do...but what you want to do. Nicole sent me that quote and it is good. Yet it's just not exactly me. It's hard for me to be like I just gotta do what I want to do and not think about everything else. Lately though, that isn't really the problem, the problem is even more I don't even know what I want to do. Eh, we'll see. Ok not much else to say now.

Listen to the dumbness being professed by my oral comm teacher. As if he isn't already the most ridiculous man on the face of the earth with his like going over things like a cabillion times and being a harsh harsh grader and giving the trickiest quizzes. Well now we have 7 classes left and he just decided to cancel one and so we only have 6 classes left. Yet in this time we are supposed to do our Persuassive Speeches (our last round of speeches took six class periods to get through the whole class and they were shorter), 6 rounds of short impromptu speeches (which it takes about a class period for 3 rounds), 2 quizzes and at least one day of him teaching and us watching examples of Persuassive Speeches. So basically I don't know how we are ever going to finish in time yet in class he said we are on schedule and doing great. I think he has no idea when the semester ends. So basically I have a feeling he is going to make us go to class during exam week or something, I totally would not put it past him but we'll see. Dumb, Dumb, Dumb. Oh by the way Halloween candy is cheap at Eckerd well prolly all stores. I bought a huge bag of bags of skittles and starburst for 1.24 each.

I have felt so stressed lately and yet I'm not sure why. I feel like I have so much to do and yet I do nothing. Like I do have tons of huge papers and presentations coming up and that is starting to worry me but it is something bigger. Like I feel so like i need to be doing something or finding something but I am not sure what that is. I go out just to get out of my house as much as possible but it doesn't make me feel any less stressed. I think part of it is I feel like I never have any time alone. Like I can never just sit in my house alone, there is always someone around. Sometiems you just need to be alone with noone bothering you or anything. My parents are always home, i think that is part of what is bothering me. I don't know. I just feel like I have to make so many decisions but I am not even 100% sure what those decisions are and I think it is extra bothering me lately because I don't want other people deciding these things for me as it appears to be happening. I don't know, like I just I feel like I have no direction in anything. School, work, relationships, nothing. I am going nowhere fast. Last night I ended up just walking up and down elmwood at like 10 o'clock by myself. It was refreshing, I needed it. It's not that I am like not happy though, like seriously lately everyhthing seems to be going really good and I have been really lucky but that almost makes me more nervous like it will all come crashing down. I am not sure what brought about this most recent rash of constant worrying and stress but it is no fun. I think part of it is I have noone I feel like I can really tlak to or maybe I have too many people I can talk to? That's weird I never thought of that before. I feel like I need one person who I can just tell everything but I keep some secrets from everyoen or don't feel comfortable tlaking to anyone about eveyrthing, like if I don't think I"ll like their answers. I don't know, I feel like maybe I need someone new just to tlak to, someone with no history with me and knows nothing about me. Who knows? Tomorrow I could feel totally different as often happens with me. I've almost fallen back into the pattern when I just drive past a place over and over thinking I will see a specific someone, and I don't mean that in liek I am searching for one particular person, but some person at different times and that liek I will just see them and they will solve everything and understand everything. But I never do. Ok that didn't make so much sense but I can't really explain it any better in type.

It's really over. How sad! One of the best stores in the world, Vix Drugs has closed. This store has provided me with numerous deals and good times through the years. Over the last few weeks since I found out they were closing I have been quite an addict, visiting up to three or four Vix stores everyday. Well I can definetely say over these few weeks I have amassed a lot of cheap junk, and lots of greeting cards. How can you go wrong at 95 and even 99% off. I also bought lots of streamers cuz they were cheap. I tried to post a picture of my favorite Vix , the one on Kenmore Avenue, but it didn't work. I thought it should end there at the Vix where all my deep discount dreams began. The picture is minutes after they closed on monday. RIP VIX

This will just be a short entry and i am only doing it so I don't get deleted. Well on saturday i went to my cousin Jennifer's wedding. It was fun. Me and Paul were ushers and we seated everyone far back thinking that the first few pews were reserved. BUT THEY WEREN'T! So as the people are about to start walking down the aisle , everyone in the church is getting up and moving. I also smoked my first cigar at the wedding and I smoked the whole thing. There is tons of video and pictures of me doing this and everyoen watched like i was a sideshow. There are even pictures of me tearing as I inhaled too mnay times by mistake. Also, i tried to light the wrong end first. I guess I am not a natural born smoker for sure but if i want to reunite with my mafia past I am going to have to start smoking cigars.
Not much else has happened recently, lets see. Oh i saw Mystic River and it was redic, not the movie, but the fact that me and jil had to wait in line for like a half hour because Scary Movie 3 opened that night. It was so dumb. I htought we were going to become friends with the couple behind us in line but they left and got sick of wiaitng. The movie was really good excpet the last twenty minutes and the whole relationship between keven bacon an dhis possible wife was ridiculous and unnecssary but otherwise it was good.
So today I had to give a sppech in my public speaking class and I was going to talk about how to create a memory slideshow thing like and video montage. Well i found out my computer can't be hooked up in the room and so I had to like replan my whole speech form mindnight till 4 am and then i couldn't get my vcr to work to get the video clips i needed but eventually i did. I think it acutally ended up going really well and people seemed genuinely entertained by it and seemed to enjoy it. Even though my teacher is a little crack addictish and a horrible mean grader from what i hear so who knows how i actually did. OMG it was so exiciting on the test i had in inbterpersonal commm i got a 99 even though i serisoulsy did not know any of the essays. I made up so much crap for that test i have no idea how i got the 99 but hey i'm not complaining. Ok i gotta go we have to decide what to be for halloween paryt. I want to be those monkey's that play the cymbals and wear suspenders and short shorts but who knows what we will be. For some reason I want to wear a costume that invovles the least amount of clothes possible. Well see what me and jill come upu wiht. Ok chadios for now.

So Friday was Halloween and me, Teres and Jill went to a party at my brothers. And Amanda, Katrina and Jessica met us there. I was afraid because when I had called my brother a little earlier noone was there yet, but I thought hey, at least that means more food for me. But by the time we got here there were quite a few people. Jill dressed up as a windup doll and I dressed up as one of those wind up monkeys that plays the cymbals. Yes, in the end I won out and got to be a moneky in shorts and a vest. Teres refused to dress up. Katrina and Amanda were witches. I had to put my costume together very last minute cuz I had to work all Halloween day and so a terrible tragedy occured. I couldn't find a monkey mask anywhere or figure out how to make a monkey face so I ended up buying this Christmas curious george-like stuffed animal that was huge and cutting off its head and using its stuffed animal head carcass as a mask. Actually my mom did the actual ripping off of the head. Hopefully we can sew it back on and donate the stuffed animal to some child or something. Sad but I had to do what I had to do. Then me and Jill went to Amvets to find the perfect shorts and vest. The shorts weren't as perfect as planned becuase i was suppsed to take them in and shorten them a little but didn't have time. My tail was really the thing that keeps the cold air out from coming through the door in my living room. And the cymbals were paper plates with these knobby things i found. It was all very last minute but came out pretty well if i do say so myself. The only thing was i didn't get to see how i looked totally until the pictures were developed because in order for the face of the moneky to show i had to look down and then i couldn't see myself in the mirror. OH i also had a bowtie. If I took off the moneky mask though I looked basically like a not so good looking, and not so built stripper. But eh.

So anyway, they had some aperteeth (play on words of apertif but i don't even know what that is so it was above me) and it was quite gross. So Katrina made me a drink that was yummy that was sierra mist, grenadine and vodka. I liked it a little too much. It was even better with some ice so it was cold. Jill liked this guy Richard that was there well i don't know that she liked him but she was interested in him in her drunken stupor and they ended up making out a little and Teres took a picture of it. Me and Teres decided Jill had to go home becuase she was too drunk and she was getting sick. She gave in pretty easy but it was so funny because to convince her to go we said that I was leaving too and she was like "you can't fool me I will notice if you weren't in the car". So then the next day when i called her she was like "oh you went back to the party after you dropped me off" and I was like "jill i was never in the car" and she did not remember at all. It was funny!! Jill barely ever throws up and she threw up numerous times so she must have been quite drunky mcdrunks.

Anyway back to the party, so Jill, Teres, and Katirna, Amanda and Jessica all left at like two but I could not because I had forgotten my house keys at home and I didn't want to wake up my parents in the middle of the night so I decided just to stay the night at my brothers. I was a little durnk and my have been a little annoyijng, I know it is hard for anyone that knows me to picture me being annoying but it happens, lol. I talked about Eckerd a lot, well you know Eckerd is my one true love so it comes up in converstaion but the people I talked to go to the W. Utica Eckerd which just isn't as good as mine. Some people claimed my Eckerd was ghetto and old and dirty, and I guess when I think about it it kinda is, but it felt like a personal attack. I didn't reveal any patient information though which is good.

So after all my friends left I realized I didn't know anyone left, well i knew Paul and Matt and Terry but noone else so I
wa
s

li
ke "Oh crap what am I going to do now?" But I ended up talking to Chamille. She was very interesting and fun. She works with Terry at the IRS and lives on Elmwood too. I tried to convince her she should start an online journal but she didn't want to. She has quite an intersting life and frankly I think we all know that this website could use some spice that I think she has. But I don't think she is going to. Her crazy escapades though would be interesting for everyone to read. IT was crazy cuz I was like, "you can use a code name like Tonya or something" and it turns out her real first name is Tonya. Well Latonya. BUt isn't that crazy. I just randomly picked Tonya and it ended up being her real name. Craziness. I would tell you Chamille's stories but I don't think she wants them in public and that is why she doesn't' have a journal. Hmm what else happened.

Oh then one of the Chrises was talking to us also trash talking my eckerd or maybe he was the only one trash talking it no the ohter chris did to i think, i don't really remember, all i remember is that there were viscious attacks on Eckerd. He used to go to Eckerd and claims he shops there but I've never seen him. He says the people in our pharmacy are snotty but they are not, they just are concerned. And he went to RiteAid now which is like the worst pharmacy in the world! I also heard from one of the Chris's that my dad is afraid of their dog and when they walk it by my house he runs inside (cuz they live around the block from me or soemthing I think, somewhere in Kenmore at least). But I think my dad is a hardcore poopwatcher and so although he may not chase them down because he is afraid ofd their dog it won't stop him from calling the police, but chris said they use a bag anyway and clean up after their dog so thats good. My dad is a little crazy with people poopin on our lawn, well not people but dogs. Well I"m sure he would be crazy about people doing it to but I don't believe that has happend ever.

Then it was weird cuz really I am way younger than everyone else that was there besides my friends, and if not way younger at least some younger and Chamille was like 27 and Chris was 30 and they were talking about taxes and services and stuff and I was like wow I feel young. And then I felt dumb cuz someone was like wow you're a virgin and your 20 but whatev. And really it was none of their business as far as I'm concerned. Wow I can't believe I just put that in my journal, well i don't really care, its the truth. That reminds of something related, I am a little sick of people thinking they know things about me, or more why are people I know telling people things that is totally my space to tell. Like it is not up to them to deicide these things and tell people, last time I checked it was up to me.

I also talked to some girl from the Co-op house, who thought I was crazy cuz I don't know what a concept album is wait I think that was her I really don't remember but I know I talked to her. Chris said he has seen his dad, and brother and some other people die in a car accident which is crazy sad and he said he thinks he has a curse or something and people get in more accidnets with him like people that never had been in accidents before. He said a door impaled him in the accideent where he saw his dad die and he had all these scars on his chest where he had the stitches and said he had all reconstructive surgery on his face. I am not sure if he made all that up cucz he was drunk or if it was true but if it was true that's crazy sad stuff to happen in a life and so I prayed a little bit for his car safety for him today at church and whlie that really means nothing to most people, I figure it can't hurt right?

I think I may have annoyed people at the party with my excessive Eckerd talk and the such and sorry if I did if you are reading this which you probably aren't because noone is but if you are and you thought I was annoying sorry.

So anyway to
conti
nue, e
very
one le
ft except Paul, Terry, Matt and the two Chrises and me and then the two crhises left at some time I am not really sure when. My mom called at like 11 the next day and was mad b/c she wanted the role of film I had in order to get pictures from my cousin's wedding that were also on the role developed before she went to my Aunt and Uncles that afternoon. I didn't want to wake anyone up to have to drive me home so my dad came and pciekd me up and took me home. Before I left I tried to clean up at least a little bit and threw up some plastic cups that were around but then my dad got here and I had to leave. I got all the pictures developed so I'll put some up here.

Overall I had a really good time and I think most people did. Although sleeping with a tail is a little hard. It was a little annoying cuz it was always in the way. Oh yeah and once again my music tastes were insulted. Ok so i realize for sure as I have mentioned before that I like the worst music but eh whatev. Actually I do like being introduced to new music though and some of it is good. That was another time I felt young when people were all like, You have never of heard of so and so but it was fun. Ok I guess this is all for my entry for now, if I think of more from the party I will add another entry later. Chadios. Here are some pictures from the night:


Katrina, Amanda, Jessica, Jill and Teres


Holly, all sparkly


Chris, Paul, Lindsay, and Hetris


Me and someone whose name I don't know


Teres and Jill


Me and Jill at the beginning of the night


Me and Jill a little bit later on


Me, Katrina, Amanda, and Jessica


Paul and Chamille (top), Chamille in a cool mask (bottom)


Chrises wearing monkey mask when fallen asleep


Me as the night progressed


And of course the best for last, who are they?

So this weekend I made the plunge and decided to stay in Fredonia for over 24 hours. Craziness. Well anyway i found my way there suprisingly well without getting lost at all. That is until I got to the campus becasue I was supposed to meet MK at the outdoor amphitheater. It took me about a half hour to find it and i seriusly wondered the entire cmapus like walked off the campus and back , it was insane. But I foudn it eventually without anyone's help which felt good. Then we went to Wendy's where I discovered they have a Chicken Club. I never knew they had that. What craziness. I love bacon! It is my lifeblood. Well in actuality it is prolly preventing my lifeblood from pumping through my overly clogged arteries but htat is why they have prescription drugs right? Well after Wendy's MK had another class so i had a little over an hour to myself again so I decided I was going to go read in the amphitheater. On the way I saw Carly, and we talked for a little while, what are the chances of just happeining to run into her, pretty slim i would say so that was kinda crdazy. THen I decided to call Jen cuz she had called me and I heard a whopper of a story from her..

It turns out her friend at RIT is a crazy sex maniac who like i won't get into the details here but she basically had sex with her b/f and his roomate well his roomate was more of an outside contributor. I don't know but it was craziness but very funny. Also, Jen probaly got the job at Walden Books. Congrats JEN!!! And her and Gordon are more friends now then stalker/stalkee so that is good! She isn't seeing Tom anymore though, well she sees him but not in the we get action kinda way.

So back to Fredonia. I went by MK's class/rehearsal but they were facing the other direction so noone saw me. I walked around some more and then went back to the amphitheater to read and wait. Well i am liek the only person around and all of a sudden I hear a camera taking some pictures. I turn around and some kid was taking a picture, I believe of me. But they left. I don't why they were doing that. I was looking pretty collegiate though sitting there reading outside. Maybe it was for a brochure or something like that. Or maybe they juts thought i was incredibly hot. Or maybe they were taking a picture of some buidling, and not me but I would like to think it was me. So anyway then MK gets out of class and we go back to her room and I met her roomate Julie who was really nice and quite a tlaker. I think she takled for the entire lke half hour she was getting ready cuz swhe was going back to Buffalo for the night cuz she had a test in buffalo for teachign or something on saturdya. Anyway she left and then MK had to go practice. So I had another hour by myslef but this time I had AIM at least cuz I was in MK's room. So i talked to some people including MK's wants it to be her boyfriend guy. I pretended to be MK and sent him some Adina Howard Freak Like Me lyrics. BUt i think he found out it was me. Then MK got back and we wnet to dinner where on the way we met up with Chirs. It was craziness cuz we also saw the devil aka brad who i hate more than anyon ein the world. It annoys me though cuz generally people don't hate him and don't' udnerstand why I hate him. But after Brad walked away I was like "I hate that kid" , and Chris said he hates him too! How cool is that! Noone ever says that, so that was exciting that someone shared my hatred! I had a baked potato wiht cheese and brocolli for dinner but it wasn't that good cuz the cheese wasn't really melty which was sad, cuz unmelty cheesy is like the worst thing that could happen to a person.

Well after dinner me and MK's sister anne sat and talked for like fifteen minutes before we had to go meet her paretns before the concert MK was in. I was not super looking forward to the concert but it ended up being really cool. The concert was this group called the Swingle Singers. They do they the instrumental of songs but like with singing an
d
th

ey
h do classical music and current music and all kinds of stuff. It was really neat and then MK's choir thing joined them for two songs. Oh by the way at intermission i went to use the bathroom and we all know I am not a heavy user of public restrooms cuz they gross me out, well anyway , there was a line! DO YOU BELIEVE THAT? A LINE AT THE MEN'S ROOM! CRAZINESS!!! I think it was mostly because the concert was filled with mainly older men and women, like seriusly the average viewer's age was prolly about 58 and that was only because me and anne helped bring it down with our youthfulness.Anyway i guess old men pee slow or something but that wasn't the wrost part after a while and realizing all these people were cutiting my in line i realized I was just standing behind two old guys who were tlaking and not in line so i had actually not been in line most of the time. Craziness.

Well after the concert everyone in chamber singers was in love with the Swingle Singers who were really good and were mostly younger like in their 20's and 30's i think. Well everyone really loved Tom, who was i bleieve a tenor and only 24 and considering half the chmaber singer guys are gay both all the guys and girls loved him. I felt a little out of place among all these chambers people because they are all quite a tight group and sing and i don't , well not well, and stuff but they were nice. I felt so wrong for not caring about the Swingle Singers that much even though they were good. Well MK got Tom's signature and she was happy.

Then some drama ensued because the Swingle Singers were going to hang out at some bar where you had to be 21. So we went to this girl's LIndsey apartment to see what was going on. And it turns out their conductor Dr. Lange i belive was his name had gotten the whole top floor of the bar so everyoen could go. At this point I was not really looking forward to spending the entire night with MK's chamber singers and their obsession with swingles but it ended up being pretty fun. I felt bad though because I was sitting right across from Tom which was prime seating and I could care less. But eh it happens. Oh and I totally called that he likes girls like a half hour before he mentioned it, quite to the dismay of Pat. Well at like 1:30 or :40, they decided to move on to BJ's which is a bar down the street from where we were. But you have to be 21 but lindsey works there and was suppsed to be able to sneak us in the back. Oh I almost forgot, this annoying girl I beilve her name was Carline like moved in next to Tom and stole him from conversation for the rest of the night and he was so not interested in what she said, possibly because at one point she aske dif the brititsh guards really don't ever move. Yes, i'm sure he had never been asked that before. Oh the swingle singers are from europe, mostly england with some germany and israel i belive. I mean i'm not saying I asked the most intelligent questions, at one point asking "do you have to wait for someone to die to get in since there are always only 8 members?". Well anyway Tom decided not to go to BJS but Jo one of the girl Swingles did, she was really cool. Anyway we didn't end upe ven getting in because lindsey couldn't get to the back door to let us in. So me and MK and pat went back to the school. Me and MK then just hung out in her room for the rest of the night i think. We took some crazy quizzes online including "are you an ass monkey and your blue nippples have traveled to japan?" Needless to say Mk wasn't one of those. OH i forgot, i said the dumbest thing ever. On the way out of the building where the conert was there was like this huge white wall of another buidling across form us but i didn't realize it was a wall and i said "OH MY GOD, it is so foggy out" and then i was like "oh wait , that is a wall" It was quite embarassing. After that Brad's paretns met MK"s but i stood a fair distance away wanting to distance myself from the parental units of Luciipher.

Sidenote, we went to Pat and Willy's ro
om so
Willy
coud
l do M
K's hair. And willy is a harsh hairstyler but he gets the job done but anyway Pat was all like syaing his room was so messy when seriusly it wasn't especially after seeing MK's room. No offense MK. So anyway we went to bed aroudn 4:30 or 5 but i only slept like for 20 minutes here and there cuz I have a problem sleeping not in my own house and I ended up like really waking up and getting out of bed at 10 and had like at least like 2 hours before MK or anyone else woke up. But at least Jen and Jill were online for some parts of that time so I talked to them. And i was going to go shower since noone else was up and it would have taken some time but I forgot a towel and I coudn't find MK's cuz I didn't want to take one of her roomates. So then MK woke up and I showered but I used deep pore cleanser for my whole body basically becuase i remembered that even though I also forgot regular soap but eh it happens. It is surprising I forgot anything considering how much I packed. Mk thought it was a little excessive that I had three coats, three pairs of shoes and liek 6 tshirts and 3 or 4 long sleeve shirts for just staying one night. I guess it was a ilttle excessive but I didn't know what we would be doing or what I would need to wear to it. I slept in MK's bed and she slept in her roomie's since her roomie was gone. OH and the day befroe when i had an hour to kill while mk was in rehearsal I took like a million online quizzes and wrote down all the resutls. I remember i should be in Aladdin cuz I lie steal and cheat to get my way. My heart is yellow cuz i am not looking for love. I am a school girl in my sexual attitude in that I like to show my panties and giggle and check out ofther girls boobs in the lockerroom, i think that quiz was for girls but it didn't say so. Hmm what else, i don't remember.

So then on Saturday after showering and stuff we went to brunch with Mary and Randi. They are two of MK's suitemates. They are real nice and I had met them before. I had eggs and bacon and french toast sticks. Hmm i had bacon again. Maybe I eat too much bacon. Oh I also had a sald cuz they had a salad bar and I cannot resist a salad bar. They are heaven. You can put whatever you want on it in any quantity you want. It is pure heaven. In the cafeteria I saw the fourty year old man who lives in a suite in MK's old buiding. Why would you dorm when you are 40? After brunch me and MK fulfiled one of my life long dreams and went to the JCPenney's that is not in a mall that is a few minutes from her campus. I remember seeing it when I was coming home from somewhere when I was younger but noone believed me that there was a JCPenny's not in a mall. But there it was and we went in int. It was pure crazy life changing fulfilment. It was really small and hilarious and we spent a good five mminuets in it. Then we went to DandK and Big Lots. After that we went to Fashion BUg cuz MK needed a headband but couldn't find a good one there. Then we stopped at TOps for m ilk and I bought a roll cuz they looked good. Then we went back to her dorm and sat in her room and the online was down which was a little craziness. Pat is a freakin addict and hooked online wiht like thorugh the phone and reuglar aol cuz he coudln't waikt for it to be back up. Then some people came to her room and were looking at picutres form her Scotland trip! OMG I CANNOT LOOK AT THOSE PICTURES EVER AGAIN! WHY ARE THEY TAKING OVER MY LIFE! I HAVE SERIUOSLY SEEN THEM LIKE 56 TIMES!! Anyway then we went and watched About a Boy! and then I left to come home cuz I was supposed to go out to canada with katrina and amanda and some people for katrina's bday.

well on the way home i got so tired prolly since i only had like 2 hours of sleep. And it was dark and rainy and so i seriusly though about pulling into a rest stop and getting a motel room and taking a nap before continuing but it seemed a little ridiuclous since it was only a like 50 minute to like an hour ride. So i just kept on trucking. My windshield st
opped work
ing for a
minutes,
well not
my windshield that was sitll intact but my windshield wipers. They just got tired or something and stopped working for a minute but then started working again. THis is the second time that has happend i should prolly have that checked out before it starts snowing. Eh , I'm lazy so we'll see.

Well I got home and was too tired to go out so I called katrina and told her i wasn't going but i felt really bad but there was no way i coudl make it through a night in canada. I took a nap for like an hour and then me and jill went to spot for some coffee. WE then picked up teres and went to JIm's Steakout but just teres bought food. Then i had them take me home cuz I was so tired. They were planning on having a huge fun crazy night and i didn't want to be a drag on that. Well it turned out they went to Pnk for like 15 minutes and the nTeres fell asleep and so they went home.

Today I went to Frisbees and bought a verve pipe cd and the New Radicals cd. I haven't listened to them yet but I hope they are good. Jill told me the Verve pipe will be a letdown but we'll see. I was thinking today that the movie Camp is good and people should see it. I also went to Vix today and there discounts are now 40-75% . I bought some tissues, chapstick and certs. and a bottle of water. The bills won today! WOOHOO!! it's about time they did some good.

Oh my gosh ,listen to this crazy story. This lady my mom knows, when her son was three while she was sleeping her son escaped fomr the crib and took oil, dish detergent and flour from the kitchen and spread it all over the floor all over the house so he could slide around. That's not all htough. He also threw all his dirty diapers, (this was in the days of reusable washable diapers) out their sixth story aparment building windowa nd also threw all the contents of his dad's wallet one by one out the window. What a crazy mofo of a kid huh? Well insanity. I guess he turned out ok in the long run thgouh.

Well I guesss this is all I have to say for now. it didn't get as long as I thought it would be. I hope that you all appreciate that I learned how to make paragraphs. Well i hope it works at least. Oh and I would appreciate if peole stopped spreading things about me that aren't necesarrily true. I'm not really going to detail that anymore. Ok chadios for now.

Lauren Miller, a sophomore at Fredonia College died this weekend in a car accident. While I never knew her, any friend of Marykate's must be a great person. It is terribly tragic for anyone so young to die. Please keep her in your prayers. To Everyone at Fredonia, especially Marykate, my heart goes out to you and while I know I can't possibly understand what you guys are going through, I'm thinking about you.

Oh my gosh! I love the song Have you ever seen the rain? It is really good. I had heard it before but forgot about it and then it was in some tv show today and it was so good!!! I am working steadily on my soap opera scripts so as soon as me and MK figure out a way to transfer stuff from my computer to hers and then onto a website, we will be the best online soap opera ever. And I can't wait to tape it. I'm always looking for actors/actresses. Well really who knows when I am going to tape but if/when I do, I will need lots of people. So I was thinking of taking this online journal in a new direction. I was thinking of being the elmwoodstrip.com gossip columnist. Sort of like the Dorothy Lucey of Good Day LIve but instead me and elmwoodstrip.com. WWe'll see. I could keep everyone up to date on the latest celebrity happenings and local going ons. Hmm but for today I'll still keep it as about my ramblings. Last night me and Jill had a hankering for some Tully's but htey were closed due ot water damage or something. It was so crappy! I wanted it so bad. So then after debating where to go for like an hour we decided to go to Gabriel's Gate wehre there was another like half hour wait and then they sat us in the little table in a corner in the back. The waitress totally forgot aabout us and we didn't get our check for like six days. She proabably couldn't see us in the corner. But i did enjoy the free popcorn although they do have that at Tully's too. Then we went to Spot and I tried to get someone to go talk to the guy they love at a different coffee shop but they wouldn't. But that's ok cuz we all know I wouldn't talk to anyone either. THen on the ride to Hollywood Vdieo in complete silence we realized we had nothing to say. Like we had said everything there is to say. It was a little werid. But we still had fun, well i did, i'm not so sure jill did. I think she was quite not happy. And I told her she seemed not happy. And then when the cashier at Hollywood Video asked "how are you?" and most normal people give the customary ok or something liek that jill instead says "I'm fine but if you ask him, i need mental help". It made me look like an abusive b/f kinda. NOt that i'm abusive nor her b/f but i looked it. It was real classy looking. We rented some movie with Elijah wood, Mandy Moore and the girl from Run Lola Run. It was an ok movie, not too bad, not amzing but closer to good than bad. We were going to rent the Lizze McGuire and Amanda Bynes movie but decided that is when we are really desperate although secretly those are the movies we want to see most. I think this is the last entry where I talk about what me and JIll did the night before unless it is something exciting. I have prolly put most readers to sleep by now, well that is assuming anyone reads this.

Hmm what else.... I don't know what to do. I sometimes get these urges to just like scream and yell and just like clear the air on things but then I don't cuz I realize what will that gain me especially when I think like something has passed. But then it seems like it always comes up again later and if I could just have had it all out earlier i feel like it wouldn't come up again. If I just fully dealt with things then maybe I wouldn't have to relive them all the time. Who knows! Maybe it wouldn't do anything. I don't wnat anyone to read into that that I am mad at them, cuz that is not what it is. Grrr! I say Grrr a lot. Someone told me long ago, there's a calm before the storm, I know, its been coming for some time, when its over so they say it will rain a sunny day, I know, shining down like water, I wanna know, have you ever seen the rain? You know what today it was super raining for like five minutes while i had to be outside, it was insane.

So Bob, the pharmacist at work is leaving today. It is sad for two reasons. Well one is cuz he was a good pharmacist and they seem hard to come by lately. Secondly, he was part of my commun
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ons project b/c we never have anything to say to each other really for some reason so part of my project was trying to have more conversation with him. But I guess that its too late now. Eh. The Bills lost in a terrible game today. People were coming into Eckerd during the game. What freakin losers. It was weird like one lady today told me that I was the most competent tech there and that she is so glad I work there, (and no this isn't the lady who told me if she were forty years younger we'd have a fling..ewww) and then like two customers later a lady told me she like gave me this rx to put on file and dtodl me this stuff last time i was there and that I had messed it all up and I was so bad. Hmm maybe she is crazy. That is what i think. There is generic paxil now. People are happy cuz they can get their happy drugs and for less now. Which makes them happy too. So I'm glad for them. Banana Rum is good. You should try it although I don't advocate drinking. I really want a JetCafe from Coffee & right now but they are prolly lcosed. That's too sad. Cuz i really want one. Also it is werid cuz I am there everyday and I don't want them to think I am a stalker or something. Although they prolly don't even notice I am there so much. IT's so funny that me and my friends always assume everyoen notices us and remembers us. Well actaully they prolly do b/c we always end up being loud and obnoxius and possible wrestling to the ground at the register. Whatev! I really want to read this book called Glitter something or other. No not the Mariah Carey movie, but a book about somle college students at OXford in england, It seemed interesante.

I saw the movie 13 at the movies the other day. It was crazy. When I was 13 the worst thing I did was light cigarettes on the kitchen stove and singe my friends eyebrows. These girls were crazy in the movie. And it is based on a real story sorta i think. Insanity.

I'm so sad that Vix is going out of business. I love that store!!! It is seriously heaven and OMG even biggere news they lowered the raised level of the Eastern Hills Mall food court. It is insane. That was what made it so cool!! Now where can we eat our abosorbant amounts of orange chicken from China Panda. Now we have to sit down low, like we're nobodies. Structure/Express is having a big sale and I recommend it. They had tons of stuff for $10. They say it is their biggest fall sale ever and I believe it cuz it is pretty big.

So Jen got a new roomate again. That is three rooms in three weeks. Insanity. Poor Jen. But at least she likes her roomates and they seem nice. She also has a stalker which is exciitng. Well not so much a stalker as a kid who likes her and follows her around and buys her stuff. You know what I just realized I only use the word kid to refer to boys usually not girls. If its a girl I'll say girl but if its a guy i'll say kid. Strange. Anyway, I can't wait to go visit Jen at crazy RIT. And i am going to Freodnia too soon hopefully. Craziness.

I keep buying cds like they are going out of style. Well actaully most of the ones I buy have gone out of style. Thank god for Frizby's used cd store on my corner. I bought Scream 2 sndtck., and MC Hammer cd, and a soul for real cd that has candyrain on it. Candyrain is an amazing song. I think the owner of Frisbee's definetely knows me as the kid who buys the cds noone else will and has the craziest collection. I also bought the Outkast cd this week. It was not so good. I may have already written about it, I don't remember. But i think they should not have made individual cds but stuck together instead. They are much better together than separate. Ok i guess I have written enough for this time, so i'll end with a line from whatever song is playing on my computer right now, "Hot Cha where are you? Everybody's eyes are closed, so hotcha where are you?"

So tonight me and Jill went to Coffee & , where they have the best drink in the world. It is a mocha Jet Cafe. The one worker introduced me to it when I was looking for a mocha shake and I am so glad he did b/c seriously it is the best drink ever and I am addicted and I recommend everyone go get it! After coffe & me and JIll sat in the car and sang the line "Too shy to shy hush hush eye to eye" over and over and over changes our vocies and our volume. It was just too much fun. The two guys Jill has a crsuh on were at Coffee & working which was good for her and I did my best to embarass her by saying their name out loud and doing the sideways walk. I'm not sure how often I am going to update this journal cuz I am losing interest a little bit. But we'll see