first, i went to bed before 7 last night. i did not go anywhere, i did not talk to anyone; i just sleep. let me tell you, it was the best time i have had in a long time. sleep is great.

after a day of complete and utter torture, sleep was the cure. i can go about my day now with a better view on things. top be short about it, i work with emotionally disturbed children yesterday as my cute little down syndromw student may be getting pulled out of school by her psycho overprotective and paranoid 70-yr old mother who is working the system so she doesn't have to(more on that at another time). lets see here: i was kicked, slapped on the face, had my hair pulled, spent four hours listening to crying, laughing, yelling, and even quite a bit of screaming. one child tried to make out with me and started grabbing my chest. at denny's, they were touvhing other people's food; people at other tables. they were following our server around and grabbing various things from the waiter's station. then they all got up and started to wonder around the restaurant, while the teacher and other aide were cashing out. hmmmmmmm, leaving me with six kids, who wont listen to me; that was no fun.

now, caitlin, please come back to school on monday. i never realized how good the kids in my class really are. always heloing out. following directions. looking for work to do. they are so damn cute. i love them. i really do.

those other children, they are so bad. ofcourse, i am all for helping those who need it, but those other children, they were no fun. by the end of the day, i felt so tortured and used, that i felt like crying. i was crying. i had no idea what i was going into, but oh boy did i know when i got out.

as for all of this politics talk, i will just remain kinda silent. i am certain that the world will continue on its course and that we are just a small portion of the fraction at hand. we wont be around for much longer. the earth wants to be alone with the plastic, and im ok with that. i just want to be happy, and help out a little.


going to help granny by grocery shopping for her and cleaning the apartment!

apparently some people on this site have sadi some nice things bout me. that makes me feel all good inside. diana, im still laughing about the squaredancing joke. racheal, of course im still here, and im not going anywhere.

the theme of today is hot. school, hot. tennis, hot. now, hot. at least we got the rum n coke. im burnin up...

square tonight, hope to see ya'll down there.

:O) :O) :O) :O) :O) :O)

p.s. must eat indian food this weekend!oh, and not to worry, the new pic is just tina feeling me up; we're cool like that.

damnit terry, who sat and dip those little critters forever? three pounds of little chunks of fich and me. i dipped and dipped like it aint been done before. congrats to me.



the 40 always comes back to haunt me.




p.s. im excited about this week.

to:

• kiss fancypants
  
• be with family
  
• say im sorry to all the people that i have not been up to par with this past year or so
  
• hug the mommy
  
• laugh with sister
  
• find a better place for brother
  
• have an awesome fun night with my boys, paul matthew ,and terry
  
• spend a week at the beach
  
• get tina back from taiwan

• tell everyone who i love just how great they are

(goodnight)

it friday night. i'm staying in.

wow. this is huge. i remember the days when friday night was party night, but i ust don't seem to have that urge lately. maybe its because everyon who i would be partying with just aint around, or maybe its because im a silly, still-a-little-sick sleepy-head.

instead of going out, i will spend some time in my room; hopefully drawing, listening to music, and cleaning the mounds and mounds of clothing. i have so many things to wear, but i really only wear a few things. maybe i will be thirteen again and plan out my outfits for a week. i used to lay them on the floor like they were on me, kinda cute, kinda weird.

i feel like there are so many things happening right now, and it is hard to know quite what to make of it all. i have work to do, financial stuff to figure out, an apartment and roommate to tag down, car stuff(which is always the worst ever, i even put off getting gas until i have to), friend stuff, family stuff, work stuff, school stuff, doctor stuff...yea. but, i assume i am just babbling, and that all of you have the same exact things on your mind as me. i am determined however, to overome my fear of adulthood, and learn to face it all head-on. i will no longer avoid problems and pretend that they don't exist until they get so bad that i have to deal with them. i will just be a go-getter.

congratulations to it being the weekend. i've been a good kid, or at least tried to be. i am gonna go eat something right now, preferably something meaty. i love meat. i know its bad, but i can't deny my carnivorous instincts.


i hope p, m and, t have a safe trip on their canooing/camping adventure. guys, the christians are praying for you!

its only 20 to 7. why has this been the longest day of my life? not the longest day that is a bad day. it HAS been the longest day thus far, but the best long day. i would try to write something poetic about this, but i am not a poet. it would just be bad, god-awful poetry.

good things about today:

chicken in homemade sauce.
work.
people.
fruit.
baquette.
paul.
matt.
rachel.
valentine's.
sun.
flowers.

i would go on, no, i wouldnt.








i still am yet to use the spell check. incorrect spelling is the new black.

1. i hate the zoo. its just an afwul sad smelly place. i also hate the zoo when it is 90 out. way too hot. way too stinky. too much chasing around crazy girls in wheelchairs. (i was also wearing jeans and a long shirt, whoa baby)

2. i hate the dmv. they still havent sent me my registration renewal and it is nearing two months. those bastards. they are impossible to get ahold of. the check cleared, but no registration. what up with that?

i like the sun and hot weather, but i think i will opt for a nap before i venture out this fine evening. i think i smell too. i need shower.

i tried finding people to swim and eat ice cream with, everyone is working. i am going to find another job. peace out.

so, i was just reading your journal. i read it a lot as it is one of my favorites. i owe my mom a lot of money, and she keeps paying my bills for me. and now she moved to az, and i m still here, but not even in my own place; staying with some friends of the family. i feel like i don't want to stay here anymore. i hate coming home. i have no real home, unless i decide to go there. or i could move to nyc. sell my car and just go there. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. i can't find anyone who needs a roommmate. does anyone on this site need a roommate? i need a roommate, i or have to move far away. maybe i should just move far away. at least i wont suffer through this awful weather anymore. but then there is the problem of people and missing them and all that.

i can't make a fucking decision, and now im sick again, and i don't know why i have gotten aout 8 sinus infections this past year. the doctor doesn't open until 11 and i don't want to be here. i don't feel welcome.

i just typed this whole long entry and then realized that it was all a bunch of garbage. whenever i try top write something interesting here it turns out to be a bunch of blah.

what was the name of that game where you had those little red zit stickers?

i don't know why i am saying this now, but i really, really, really hate the police. they are useless. i just watched fight club. if i could fight anyone, it would definitely be a police officer, POW!

im a sickypoo-poo. you know that feeling when you first feel you throat hurting. its all scrathy and you drink a million glasses of water, and ur still so freakin thirsty, you feel like you need a trough to drink out of? well, thats me. give me water. give me a trough to drink it out of.

work is good. call into second job today. one job was enough. schools are a breeding place for germs.

i was reading the paper this morning. the news has absolutely nothing of value, except stories about men lighting a cig in the johnny on the spot, and all the methane from the poopoo lights the place up and the man must be treated for burns. what a dumbass. no matter how bad your day was. at least you didn't get burned by shit. hahhaha.

delirious, need sleep. pimples be gone.