i will wake up now. i just woke up. yowza. i really think this new allergy stuff is making me crazy sleepy. or maybe im just lazy.

new job good. nice people. fun. hopefully i will make good money in tips. must go shower, find outfit, go looks for some needed items for the move...

yippie ky-yi-yo git along leetle doggie:)

that tj maxx is the best ever. i went in looking for a white shirt and black pants, and found both items at the total bargain price of $32.45. yay!

tina called me on my way shopping to check up. she wished me good luck with the jobby-poo. she's great. we gonna talk later.

im exctied/extremely nervous to start new job. why do i get so nervous about everything? i really need to stop this. i know, everything always works out fine, but somehow i envision the world ending when something scares me. maybe if the world ended i could just get rid of this dumb nervousness.

on another note, im super exctied about new room. must decorate. think color scheme. i don't know. colors. they are all so great. how will i choose.

here are the choices:

pink/brown
brown/red
cherry red/creamy/limey green
green/brown/off white
red/black/off white...

i really can't deal with the thought of not having everything go together, but not in a martha stewart way. it just needs to maintain a cetain homeostasis. we can mix and match, but i want everything to blend. i also want to create the illusion of space, as the room aint that big. what am i talking about? i have to go get ready for work.8*

Paul, I too am shocked about the whole Google thing. However, it doesn't mean that I thik Google should shut down. Remember Columbine? Those kids found info on the net how to make bombs and posted info on various sites that held clues to what they wanted to do. If the ifo is not in the net, it is definitely someplace else, and I guess the bottom line is, if someone wants to hurts someone else, they will do it, Terrorist Hndbook or not. Still, Google, shame on you.

Terry, I enjoyed your journal entry. When I watch the olympics, I almost feel bad when the US wins. I feel like every other country is just pissed as we flash our red white and blue in their faces. The Olympics aren't about peace, its all about the money, and the car commercials. Buy an SUV, buy a Hummer. Lets bomb some stuff. and anyways, the poor countries are always better.

I found an apartment, woohoo. I start job today, boohoo. Not working is great fun.

[size=m]"Suburban life, the American dream. Suburban life aint what it seems."-from some song that some people sing, but i can't remember who?


Found place to live in city. Feel much better about city. Things are better there. Not all the same. Not so scary and clean feeling. Not just white people. Yay![/size]

[size=m]Ok, to set the record, i was for sure the first to use chillax, Hodown. Do not think that because you are older, you are cooler. it just wont ever be that way. hahahaha.

Why is it the best day ever? I got some school stuff figured out, and i should be good to go. I am going in to find out about my new job, and i think by this evening i will have found a new home. best day ever.[/size];)

Last Saturday, I really started my search for a place to live this year. After taking the advice of my sister and friends, I headed to Spot for the newest Artvoice, and to check the message board for any possible apartment lisitings. To my surprise and liking I saw a sign posted for the Nickel City Coop , remembering a few people that I had met at parties there, it seemed like a pretty cool place to live. I dialed the number and the application process began.

I arrived at the house to grab an application and Lindsay answered the door. She was the same person I had spoken to on the phone and seemed pretty friendly and eager to meet me. After a tour of the house and a detailed explanation of how the house worked, I began to get really excited. A nice place to live, with everyone helping out to make it a home. This all seemed like a great fit for me, since I am so used to helping out around the house. I grew up having a chore list everyday, and although I have always had more responsibility than my peers, it had been rewarding to know that I can do certain things on my own.



After filling out the application and meeting many of the members, old and new, I left in an excited mood, looking forward to Sunday dinner and getting to know the rest of the co-oppers. On Sunday, I arrived a bit before 5 with wine in hand, open to whatever came. Dinner was tasty, talk was abundant, and the wine was great. I really felt like I had made a good impression. After Sunday dinner, the house members had a meeting discuusing house affairs and the a prospect of new members. I was told that I would find out that night, or at least recieve a call to hear of my status. That was kind of upsetting since I had spent a lot of valuble apartment searching time to make a strong effort for the coop house. I did recieve a call that night, but to my dismay, I learned that many of the members weren't there for dinner that night, and no decision could be made about my rejection or acceptance into the house. I was to wait a week and find out tonight.

I recieved a call at exactly ten this evening, but was unable to answer the call as I was away from my phone. The message went something like this, "Hi Sarah, this is Lindsay. I'm really sorry to have to tell you this, but we had a meeting tonight and it doesn't seem like a good fit. However, we would reallylike you to come over for dinner and get to know you more. You can call or come over Wednesday for potluck." Then she said someting along the lines of goodbye and that was it. No coop living for me.

The thing that upsets me is that I feel very judged right now. Why am I not a good fit. I guess I can't prove my good nature to anyone, or make anyone like me or want me to live with them, but I feel I have many good qualities. I can cook well. I'm friendly, caring, helpful... and other things too. I'm just disappointed because I feel like I wasn't looked at, had my application looked over, was quickly tougt about and ten pushed aside, and heard the news of this on my voicemail.

If you have seen or heard of the coop house, it might be the right place for you, but they might not feel the same way. The coop house seems like a great place to be, but also very selective in their process of selcting wo is to there. This to me is sad and unfair in a world and city of many diverse people.:(

Let's see here... I suppose there isn't anything interesting going on, well, nothing that you would find interesting. Just got back from camping, hmmmm. what can i say about camping? I can say that I am definitely not a camper, never was, never will be. as a child and young adult, I have been spoiled with many luxury vacations, i.e., big beach houses, trips to visit wealthjy relatives in L.A. and Seattle, many, many, many trips down south to hang out with the fam and chill at the beach and pool all summer. So, I guess I just have never come to appreciate the joy of camping. In fact, it just doesn't make me very joyful. No indoor plumbing, sharing a nasty shower with many, many people. The most uncomfortable crappy cot bed ever. To add to it all, it was so freakin cold, I am now sick. Oh, and I was having stomach problems the whole time. I guess I'm just used to being very spoiled, and these days i'm not. It's good for me, I think i need to learn that life is not always coming up roses, although, that wold be very very nice!

The good things about camping? Spending time with a loved one...hehe. Bip, as always(if you don't know Bip, he is my friendly little penquin friend; he's been loaned to me). Bip always follows the rules and is just pleasant to be around in general. He was my travel companion on the way to Alleghany. There was some good food, hiking was fun too.

I'm tired now, my back hurts, and my tummy. Enough complaining for now. Must sleep then make many phone calls to far off people. Why can't everyone that I need just be here? Where the hell are you Tina? I have so much I need to ask/tell you. I miss you. Come back to me safe and healthy.

I know, you think I'm annoying. You would be annoying too after three days of sleeping on those things(or lack thereof), you would.8*

so, i applied to live in the co-op house, which i am excited about, but also nervous. not nervous about being there, but nervous that i won't be voted in. the members are all having a meeting now, and either i get voted in tonight, or i don't hear til next sunday. if i don't hear tonight, i wont be very hopeful. i have to find a place in the next week or so, so, if i don't hear tonight, the search will continue, but i will still be in a stage of waiting.

it was nice, everyone was very friendly, happy and talkative. it is fun to bve around a lot of people, all happy and eating and talking. id say, if i don't get in, then they don't want me there, and i8 don't want to be there either, im gonna try and go with the no hard feeling thing, but, i don't know how that will work. please let me in! i like you! i will be good for your house! i am a good person to live with, i swear.

cross ur fingers folks!

i was so right, that party was not worth it. well, it was just to be with the epeeps and friends. rusty is always fun at parties too. i ate a disgustiing amount of food last night before bed, and now i am unshowered and looking for apartment. having a little more luck today. good day all ;)

parties suck when you don't want to go




i want:



a job


a place of my own


a trip to az and nyc




i don't think wishing on stars works, so i have to try this on my own.