mobile03/25/05 12:09 - ID#26125
missing the momma
im feeling really guilty right now for not moving to az. my mother has done so much for me and still pretty much supports me, but we live so far apart. she has this brand new beautiful home and lives by herself. shes say she likes it and doesn't miss the old house, but sometimes she'll ask me, "Do you think I should move back to Buffalo?". of course i say no, and i know that would be a mistake, but, as long as we are apart, a piece of my heart is missing. i know you can't be with your mommy forever, but i just miss her so. she accepts me and loves me and shes very supportive. its hard to only gets her hugs a couple times a year now.
i know she gets really sad and even cries sometimes because she misses her children so much, and my brother will moving here this summer. i don't know. im too dramatic. lots of families live apart right?
anyway, it wouldnt be so bad if things were going ok with her brothers and sisters and mother here. they talk a lot, but she barely sees them. why did they invite her out here then? why do they always pick fights? why did nobosy listen when she told them my aunt was going to have problems(and now she is in year long rehab)? i see how her siblings treat her,and know that i never want my relationship with my own brother and sister to be like that.
so anyway. i know az is not where i want to be. not that i even know where i want to be.
im hungry.
Permalink: missing_the_momma.html
Words: 316
Location: Buffalo, NY
03/24/05 10:59 - ID#26124
lilho I give up
frappacino...mmmmmmmmmmmm. yea, yea. starbucks is baaaaad. but isn't it all. we are all going to die someday, why not be a glutton.
soon sister will join me in the AZ. joy be to god. i love my family. they are so fucked up. aunt in year long christian rehab. granny doing well, and will get haircut and do tomorrow. momma greatest ever. rich aunt and uncle being good at having houses and buying things.
for me. i just want a little sunshine and some decent wine. maybe trip to mexico?
note to self: never travel between screaming child and bathroom on airplane filled with cranky smelly nj people. ever again. i hope.
p.s. my sis saw karl lagerfeld today, for those of you who know who he is...how cool is that?
Permalink: lilho_I_give_up.html
Words: 159
Location: Buffalo, NY
03/24/05 12:01 - ID#26123
the AZ
well i would like some baja fresh, and i deserve it after being lodged between a screaming child and the bathroom for the 5 hr duration of my flight yesterday. oh yea, im never having children. haha.
so what can i say? life is good. i need shower. and the painters are here.
i kinda wish i had a companion. mom, ur cool, but, i need friend. where's (e:thesimeon) or (e:hodown)? ugh. you two.
p.s. my sister is one part funny, three parts biatch. and jason, im sure nobody really cares much about anyone elses journal around here, or do they? im just all about the new message system.
Permalink: the_AZ.html
Words: 129
Location: Buffalo, NY
03/19/05 08:22 - ID#26122
timesareachangin
btw. who are all these newsters? remeber what they say; "make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the other's gold". so, perhaps some people might realize im golden and call me back?????
rack of lamb tonight. lunch someplace with josh-u-a ho tomorrow. DELICIOUS WEEKEND.
and bth again. since when does my sister have one nighters and not tell ME first. biaaatchiiio. some wine will heal the pain...
Permalink: timesareachangin.html
Words: 159
Location: Buffalo, NY
03/13/05 03:12 - ID#26121
springtime's coming!!!!!!!!!!!!!
two trips. one to see momma in az. one to see sister in apple town(new york).
(e:thesimeon) will be traveling with me to ny. how lovely.
p.s. i love these pretty pink flowers. i want to make a wreath and wear them in my hair.
Permalink: springtime_s_coming_.html
Words: 51
Location: Buffalo, NY
03/06/05 06:53 - ID#26120
you have a choice...
or just let anger consume you. let yourself become defeated. anger is a bad seed.
it seems some people have taken this site too seriously, and life too seriously. i do it too. but one picture should not make you delete everything, take away all that you have shared in your journal.
one of my roommates moved out today after a small misunderstanding. other people were upset with this person, but it seems it was the situation that allowed my roommate to have an exucse to leave. that is her choice.
ok. this might not make sense to you, but, i guess what i'm trying to say is, if we let these little things hurt us so much, what will we do about the big stuff. the first step towards a better human race is a better understanding, and that cannot be accomplished when people just shut down.
anger just breeds more anger, but what do i know?
im off to have a fantastic time with someone who knows better than to stress the small stuff. she never even gets mad at me, and i can be a bad friend sometimes. ancient chinese wisdom?
Permalink: you_have_a_choice_.html
Words: 252
Location: Buffalo, NY
03/04/05 06:29 - ID#26119
kiss my ass
anyway. if you need advice on how to be trashy, i have it.
if you need a haircut, let me do it. im good, and ill do it for free, or for food. i just like to work on the youngsters, not the oldsters.
new apartments are wonderful. i need to unpack.
terry filed my taxes for me this afternoon; my life is complete. finally.
Permalink: kiss_my_ass.html
Words: 80
Location: Buffalo, NY
02/28/05 11:58 - ID#26118
impossible outcomes
p.s. why does it never stop snowing?
p.p.s. why do i have to drive home from school at 10pm? its scary, when it snows that is.
i miss my mom and my sister :O(
Permalink: impossible_outcomes.html
Words: 55
Location: Buffalo, NY
02/27/05 09:36 - ID#26117
yes-a-mesh
i made the simeon more sick- he was the man. he wears a gold star now, and a sash. for being the expert mover. i better watch. i been wanred that i will be abandoned is there is another move. theres been three thus far.
moving losses: one awesome earing. three bad smelly housemates. one ant infested house. i loose the ghetto.
moving gains: just about everything else. i love elmwood! (the new place in on ashland near potomac, right off elmwood...yay!
Permalink: yes_a_mesh.html
Words: 92
Location: Buffalo, NY
02/25/05 02:50 - ID#26116
send me messages
who makes a message system and then nobody sends me any. this is all wrong.
anyway.
weekend. yay. moving? i sure hope so. my operations are alway so half-hazard.
at least i got some pretty flowers around the room. what am i talking about...i need lunch. and maybe some bacon-later though. i need to ease into the day.
Permalink: send_me_messages.html
Words: 65
Location: Buffalo, NY
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