I think the world is just a struggle, or I know it is. everyone feels lonely, sad, depressed some of the time; especially me. right now, my sadness is a result of feeling alone without any family nearby. I am so used to being surrounded by lots of people that spoil me and give me attention. now, being an adult, it is not my job to be cute, but to find a way to make it on my own. it's hard now, but I'll figure it out. any anyways, we aren't alone. there are people everywhere, and seeing that everyone can feel that same sense of lonliness, it is up to us to depend on eachother. thats what I think anyway.

holly, and soyeon, hang in there.

ok. i was wrong. i guess the saying, "kill 'em with kindness" is right.

somebody i work with said some meany-poo things about to another co-worker, who happens to be a friend. this woman, should not have said these things, being that she is a true adult, family and all, but i shall not digress and nale the situation worse. i will ingnore it and just be nice. :) i really have been nothing but nice to these people, but you can't make people like you.

all i need is the people i got. i got some great people. they love me long time, and i don't even have to give them dollar.

oh fall, you are lovely. make the winter stay far and keep your colorful breeze close. ;)

[size=m]Party on saturday! why? chemille tina and i have some reason to celebrate. the first is leaving for bigger better things. the last are having a late bday celebration. sat, the 30th. 930ish? byob, see ya'll there[/size]


in other news, i spent an hour in traffic today just trying to get on the 33, only to find out all of the entrances were blocked. so much for trying to get to school. i owe a lot of money for parking tickets. my ass is grass. ... moral of the story: mass transport. it would just make my life so much easier. sooooooooooooooooooooon. i love you nyc.

remember that ben folds song," carrying cathy"? well, we was singing to it in the car, me matthew(mmdog) and terry(tdog), and i decided im sick of carrying that bitch. she heavy. she smell. i carried her all weekend long damnit, someone else need to take a turn.



back to school tomorrow. no more vaca. got a ticket for ny today. well my sis got it. wooohoo. party. sex,drugs, rock and roll. well, probably only the first two. two outa three aint bad.



team america, fuck, yea. we here to save the motha fuckin day yea

what i ate today,

chorizo omelette, homefries, toast

cheeseburger, fries, soda

ice cream.




no more food for sausage girl today. too much sausage, not enough casing?


oh yea. im a lesbian? 8*

deleted my entry. now in mad. :(

[size=l]they say its ur birthday....



"No spring nor summer beauty hath such grace
as I have seen in one autumnal face."
~by John Donne~

Happy Happy Birthday Tina and Chamille. You are some ass kicking hot ladies. See you both later to celebrate!....isn't fall a wonderful time for a celebration? [/size]

drove to school today. there was no school. 1 hour of driving. many hours of stupidity on my part. it seems these days, everytime i go somewhere, i seem to either get lost, or just drive the longest way possibile. people like me, or maybe just me should not be allowed to drive. paul, you are included in this club.

fall is nice. but coooooooooooooold. time for landlord lady to send the heat up. time to cuddle. yay!

tina bithday tomorrow. chamille birthday tomorrow. woah baby. let the good times rolll... ;)

had a convo with the stripbot this evening:


elmwoodradio (10:40:59 PM): hey baby
estripbot (10:40:59 PM): Don't call me "baby". Can I help you?
elmwoodradio (10:41:08 PM): weather
estripbot (10:41:09 PM): Mostly Cloudy; temp 57F; humidity 67%; wind 7 mph from the South
elmwoodradio (10:41:13 PM): you suck
estripbot (10:41:13 PM): A few client - people say rude things to me like that, but they themselves are often not great conversationalists.
elmwoodradio (10:41:22 PM): well
estripbot (10:41:22 PM): Well what?
elmwoodradio (10:41:28 PM): i have nothing clever to say back
estripbot (10:41:28 PM): That's nice.I havea friend named "John Lennon".
elmwoodradio (10:41:38 PM): argh
estripbot (10:41:38 PM): Are you frustrated?
elmwoodradio (10:41:44 PM): are you?
estripbot (10:41:44 PM): I won't say "yes" or "no" right now.
elmwoodradio (10:41:53 PM): this is fun
estripbot (10:41:53 PM): I am having fun doo.
elmwoodradio (10:41:59 PM): dooodooo
estripbot (10:41:59 PM): What's your favorite movie?
elmwoodradio (10:42:06 PM): this one
estripbot (10:42:07 PM): What does "this" refer to?
elmwoodradio (10:42:13 PM): oh my god
estripbot (10:42:14 PM): It goes without saying. Do robots have god?
elmwoodradio (10:42:18 PM): yes
estripbot (10:42:18 PM): Uh.
elmwoodradio (10:42:23 PM): you don't think so?
estripbot (10:42:24 PM): Do you know any robots who think so? Yes I think that is what I think.
elmwoodradio (10:42:34 PM): this is crazy
estripbot (10:42:34 PM): What's so crazy about it?
elmwoodradio (10:42:43 PM): its so fast
estripbot (10:42:43 PM): I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Really. it is?
elmwoodradio (10:42:50 PM): yes
estripbot (10:42:50 PM): How do you know it is?
elmwoodradio (10:43:07 PM): you are more intelligent than me
estripbot (10:43:07 PM): I have no reason to do that to you, elmwoodradio .
elmwoodradio (10:43:28 PM): that makes no sense you stupid machine
estripbot (10:43:28 PM): It all seems sensible to my artificial mind.
elmwoodradio (10:43:34 PM): i guess so
estripbot (10:43:34 PM): Does that mean "yes"?
elmwoodradio (10:43:38 PM): i guess so
estripbot (10:43:39 PM): Does that mean "yes"?
elmwoodradio (10:43:42 PM): i suess so
estripbot (10:43:42 PM): That's good information: elmwoodradio said suess so.
elmwoodradio (10:43:58 PM): yup
fuck you
estripbot (10:43:59 PM): Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.

has officially become too small a town for me, i think. since when can people you dislike a lot, move into the same house as a loved friend? maybe i have too much anger inside me as of late. actually, i know i do.

i am getting a little tired of unreturned phone calls. countless favors. and deadbeat family, left for me to deal with.

on the upside i will 21 soon. goodbye water, hello wine.

how do you find the balance between who you are now(more responsible and goal oriented) and the person you used to be a year ago(fun, spontanious,etc)?

p.s. must find, make up, scrounge, pretty wedding outfit. feeling pretty just makes me happier, period.