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Category: trauma

08/19/07 11:27 - ID#40630

sex & violence

I'm just off balance. This weekend really did it to me. First I hang out with my friend Peter's guest worker tenant from Belarus and while it was really cool to hang with a 22 year old chick that is a 9/10 at the same time it just screwed with my mind on a couple of levels. I did get to bond with the topic of emotional musical concepts but in the end there was just something that never came through. This was due in part to Pete telling me that she wanted me to be more "aggressive" but in essence that just isn't me. So when I was hanging with her at a local watering hole in Y-town to me it was just good enough shoot the stuff & soak in the perception that these local guys I know assumed/thought I'd hook up with her. It didn't happen for whatever reasons but after hearing his "inside info" from her other roommate friend I just was totally sick. Although it's just not me to be ultra mr feel upper. If I did that with women from this country usually one would be brought up on charges. It was just exhausted thinking about it all. Oh, yea and during this whole experience I was just pulling emotional experiences from my ex wife who was half Polish/Ukrainian straight out of the old country. YEA....

Now on to violence.

While having a really shitty afternoon @ Fort Erie Racetrack, I noticed all available security officers moving to the left of the building. So having a little bit of curiosity I head in that direction. When I arrived in the next room I saw an "old man" late 50's early 60's all bloody in his face pushing a pile two other people wrestling/fighting. From what I gathered the "old man" got into a fight with opponent B over cutting in line at a self betting machine. Old Man's son stepped in to help his dad. It was a freaking mess. The worse part of it was the son's wife was there holding their 5-7 year old kid, the "old man's" grandson yelling at her husband/boyfriend. I just could see the kid shaking, crying not knowing what is going on. It just made me sick. The last thing I remember hearing was the mother yelling at her guy, "He [our son] is more important right now while was still getting into it with the security guards.

To top off this wonderful experience I wait an hour and 20 minutes to cross the Peace Bridge. Also while waiting on the Q.E.W. some bad ass looking menacing type tried to cut in on me with the line backed up more than a mile. He did squeeze in as I just sat there not moving or waving him in at all. After giving me the finger, ironically he did pull out of the lane and snuck in further down the line by cutting through the Duty Free Store's entrance way to the bridge.

So on a day where they had a Chicago cover band play of which was a really good act I had my experienced ruined by this event. I just sent a check to re-up my old Xpressbet account. Screw all of this hassle, I'm just going to play online by phone watching the Horse Racing channel on the Dish. I just don't need to deal with all of that shit. If I save up enough money I plan to go out to California to spend some time playing out at the actual track if its Santa Anita or Del Mar. Fort Erie is going to die anyway with the border hassles and Buffalo Creek Casino. Although I figure I may be the last of the horse players I'm going to do it from the comfort of my home or through technology. I don't have to go and get a Daily Racing Form from the track.

I'm going to hide under my covers now :-0
ARGG
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