Hardeeville, South Carolina. Yesterday, we made it down 1-77 all the way through West Virginia, the little bit of Virginia, then North Carolina and South Carolina, to I-26, then 1-95 and here -- near the Georgia border and Savannah.

Today, we are going to do a little bit of sight seeing. Head to the beach, maybe, and to downtown Savannah. Perhaps we will try to find The Lady and Sons, so i can stalk Paula Deen? No... i bet she isn't actually there much these days.

Then, we will head to Cocoa Beach, Florida and stay with a friend for the night, tomorrow, move on to Miami and the hotel (we are so much more motel people) where all my fam-damily is staying. Sunday, the wedding the the beginning of the cruise.

It's been interesting so far.... road trips can be filled with periods of fascination, boredom and bumps. We have been fortunate -- no major issues. Yay!

Well, i should get off my lazy butt and stop boring you all with my journal... those that are actually reading it... ha ha ha. No worries, i might not be near a computer (or for long enough) for another journal until we are off the cruise ship.

Have a very Happy Birthday, (e:Mrmike)! Give 4* the finger and stay at 39! Wish i could transport you here for the day to a nice warm climate!

... from Morgantown, WV.

We left Buffalo before any bad weather hit. Heavy Rain between Erie and Pittsburgh. Had a few moments of dense fog near Pittsburgh (are people from Pittsburgh called Pittsburghers, or Pittsburghites, or Pittsburghians?).

After 300 miles, (e:Uncutsaniflush) was tired of driving. So here we are in Morgantown, Wv in an Econo Lodge (or, an Eco Lod, as the neon out from said... i think it's a much better name).

Tomorrow, we hope to make it to Southern Georgia or Northern Florida....

I had to lie. I hate doing it, but i had to.

First, i told my boss that i needed from the 4th to the 20th off for our trip. Then, we made our plans on how we were going to get from Buffalo to Miami, but i didn't share them with my boss, thinking more time off would be better.

Then, i found out that there is an open competitive civil service exam for developmental disability aide trainees on the 5th. So, i signed up for the test.

My boss thinks we are leaving today. Instead, i will be at an American Legion in West Seneca writing a 3 hour civil service exam.

So, i agree with you, (e:Mike,43181) today is a big day.

Super Tuesday. I wish i could vote. Perhaps, someday, like Craig Ferguson, i will go from being a green card holder (Legal Permanent Resident) to a citizen.

Fat Tuesday. Not often it falls on the 5th... it really would be a good day to go out and get shitfaced. If, that is, i drank. Since it is the last day i will be 38.

Hey, (e:Mrmike), does it suck to have your birthday fall during lent?

A friend of ours in Knoxville is opening her own business today, too. I hope all is going well for her on her first day.... I am proud of her and sure she will be a success.

Tomorrow, my 39th birthday. We will probably leave for Miami in the afternoon. If not, we will leave first thing on the 7th.... We need to be in Cocoa Beach the evening of the 8th and in Miami on the 9th. The 10th we board the cruise ship as guests for my cousin's wedding. Then, the ship sails.

Let's face it, as we age, gravity no longer remains a friend of ours.

Never really has been a friend to me because, well, i tend to drop things. If there was no gravity, that thing i just dropped would not fall to the floor and break or smash. Simple. It would just float about right at the place it slipped out of my hands and i would grab it and go on with life.

Let's go in another direction for a short period of time. The way back machine.

When i was developing, there was a mean, cruel little test some of the girls did to show how wonderfully perky their new boobies were becoming. Take a pencil, and place it underneath said boobie. If the pencil falls to the ground, then you had good boobs. If it stayed put, it was time to raise the arms to shoulder level and thrust the elbows backwards over and over again while chanting in a sing song, 'we must, we must, we must increase our bust, the bigger the better, the tighter the sweater, the more the boys depend on us!' At ages 9, 10 and 11, i failed that test. No amount of sing song chanting would help, either. Damn it.

Now, 30 years later, i would fail that test if i used a pack of 50 pencils.

Somewhat unrelated, i went bra shopping a few days ago. Another underwire snapped. Time to do some replacing.

The staff member i dealt with at the shop was tactful. Mellon shaped or tear drop shaped, she asked? Uhm, how about ironing board shaped? Got a bra for that?

Yesterday, i wore one of the 4 new bras i purchased. I decided on one of the more supportive models. And now, 16 hours later, my ribs feel bruised.

Not just a monthly phenomena

About an hour ago, my mom called. She had a consult with my grandfather's g.p. this morning. The ct scan shows cloudy areas in his brain. Right now, they are saying the clouds are tumors. So, turns out he isn't crazy, doesn't have senile dementia or alzheimers. Instead, he just might be terminally ill. They (my mom and her brother -- his only 2 children) are going to confirm the diagnosis with more tests and an oncologist. They probably are not going to tell him. His g.p. suggested it might make the rest of his life a panic without him understanding or knowing why.

I wonder if all retail is as huge a clusterfuck as my place of employment...

The staff meeting on Sunday was... uhm... interesting. It is facinating to watch your boss lie her ass off to save face in front of her boss. To watch her put others down to make it appear as thought she has been doing her job all along. When really, she has been phoning it in to the very person she is saying is being lazy at work. Huh?

I have had a note taped up on the boss' desk for quite some time that my parents, as birthday and xmas gifts to us this year, are paying for tickets to my cousin, Rob's wedding cruise, and when i needed time off. I recently confirmed those dates with another note. So, when the schedule is done (in advance! *GASP*), i see that i am working days i am not even in town. Interesting.

Seems the manager decided she wanted to take a weeks holiday at the same time. So, i mentioned to her that she is scheduling me for time i cannot work... i did, after all, say i needed from the 4th on off, so why i am i working the 4th, 5th, 6th and 7th?! Another note with our itinerary was written. I wonder if she will have me working right up until the moment i leave? Probably.

What she doesn't know is that i need an additional day off... i just let her believe that it is part of the trip.

I am signed up to write and open competitive civil service exam to be a Developmental Disability Aide Trainee for the state of NY. On the 5th of February, the day before my birthday. The higher my score, the higher up on the waiting list i go. Scary good.

The only issue with that might be transportation. (e:Uncutsaniflush) is working so much, he might not be able to drive me. And the test is in West Seneca not near any bus route (i checked, NFTA said that there were no stops within walking distance of my destination). I am usually so organized about things. All my ducks in a row before i say i can or cannot do something. I wonder how much a cab would cost from the West Side to West Seneca? Anyone want to be my car service?

In other news, my Grandfather continues to spiral downhill. (e:LeeTee,42687) No retirement home (or as they say here Assisted Living Facility) would take him because he needed far too much attention and guidance.

His health is decent... well, except for the strokes they think he keeps having. He has gone for MRI's and tests and been poked and prodded. I don't think he understands what is going on. Which might be a good thing for him. Seems he kept saying his life amounted to nothing, and when my mom or dad reminded him of what he had done, he would say, "I did that!?!"

He has been living with my parents for a week or so. He couldn't live alone. And my parents have a home business. Imagine bringing what is essentially a large toddler to work every day. No attention span or memory, the inability to be able to get to the bathroom and back alone. It has been very difficult for my mom. Not just because it is her father and they have always had a rocky relationship, but because the burden of caring for him in the morning and during most of the day falls on her. She had a tightly scheduled life before this and a very busy business, so i suspect she is stressed, to say the least.

I tears my heart out to not be able to help. To not be able to be there to help her help her father. Or help her at work. I offered to help, but my work schedule, (e:Uncutsaniflush)'s schedule and the fact that i do not have a driver's licence all conspire to leave me unable.

Finally, however, today, being at the top of the critical wait list has paid off. He has a placement today... not too far from my parents.

And, as planned, this afternoon, (e:Uncutsaniflush) and i are heading into Stoney Creek this afternoon to help my mom out at my grandpa's condo. I think she wants me to pick out things i want before they pack things up. Personally, none of that really matters to me, but it matters to her, so i will go do it. If it helps her, i will do it. I hope to be able to help her pack some things up, too. If not today, then in the future, once the place is sold.

• sigh*

I confess. I love Graham Norton. I forgot how naughty he is... and what presenters on the telly in Blighty can get away with. If there is a way for Graham to make a joke dirty, he will manage it. Makes me giggle...

Not too long ago, (e:Uncutsaniflush) and i dvr'ed an episode on BBC America. We thought the reuniting of the original actors from The Dukes of Hazzard would be amusing. It was.

But it was the last song done by the musical guest that turned into a bit of an obsession (pun intended, see video) for me. His first song about wanting to bed Daisy... uhm, no, he meant Bo and Luke was interesting and amusing. His comedy while chatting on the sofa was strange. But that last song... i needed to have it.

Last night, (e:Uncutsaniflush) found it for me. And i uploaded it to youtube.

I cannot get this song out of my head. The (fake?) Norwegian rap is amusing... so is the line "i need him like a fat chick hates the gym". Enjoy...

This time of year can bum me out. Working retail doesn't help. The mad rush should be over, but now is the time of the mad returns and exchanges. And i truly am sorry that we run out of things; if it were up to me, we would have in the blowdryer/curling iron/flat iron/rollerset/makeup mirror you saw before the holidays. Mainly so i wouldn't have to hear the complaints.

Not having a regular schedule is exhausting to me as well. The manager, for reasons only known to her but i suspect are pure laziness, only puts up the wildly varying schedule a few days before it begins. I only work there about 20 hours a week, so i would think it shouldn't be this taxing on me. Yet how i am expected to plan the remaining portions of my life if i do not know when i am working and when i am not? Oh, yeah, that's right, i guess i am not supposed to. I think i am supposed to wait on the edge of my chair for someone to tell me when i am supposed to spring into action.

Spring into action and be positive when customers call me a bitch for telling them they cannot try on nail polish before they buy it. Spring into action and remain positive when customers come in demanding a refund on a hair colour that did not turn out because they neglected to tell the employee that they currently have black dyed hair... a refund without even the empty box or the receipt? I don't think so.

I would so like to see my father on his birthday, but i don't think it is going to happen this year. Poor sap gets so many "here, this is for Xmas AND your birthday" gifts. So, this January 7th, he is getting a phone call.... and a separate gift i hid in the house that my mom is going to give him.

So, through all the B.S. that is working retail... i am actually trying to remain positive. This is me, cursing under my breath, trying to remain positive...

I Can Has Cheezburger? helps me when i am feeling blah...

I have 2 grandparents still alive -- my paternal grandmother and my maternal grandfather. Both have not been doing well lately, emotionally, mentally, and physically.

But the news i got today was the most disheartening.

I always thought my maternal grandfather was, at best, a grumpy old man and at worst, a misogynistic asswipe. Now, i find out he is a paranoid liar with sudden onset senile dementia.

Turns out that he has been lying to everyone for years about his age and his real first name (he's Ukranian, so he was saying that Larry was just the English version of his name, but even the Ukranian version isn't what his real name is).

He has been hiding money , sewed into his mattress, and writing himself little notes and stashing them around his place... reminding himself of things that don't make sense to anyone. Just my mom's name, written on a piece of paper, stashed among his bills. Or some words that no one can read. Or an insult to someone.

He also removed both my mom and my uncle from being the power of attorney for both his medical and financial needs. Seems they were out to get him.

He has been arguing with my mom on and off for a few years, but he picks fights... and thinks my mom is a slut. Then again, he thinks all women are sluts.

He had a fall recently. He was trying to change the lightbulb in the kitchen while standing on a rickety kitchen chair. Not wise for anyone, but for an old man (albeit not as old as he has been telling people he is). His wrist was broken... trying to not break a hip, i presume, but bracing his fall with his hand/arm.

I only found out about the fall when i was talking to my mom who was talking to her brother in Michigan. My mom lives in the same area (he lives in Stoney Creek, she lives in Hamilton), but he calls Michigan for help, because he was fighting, yet again, with my mom. He refused help from her... because she "knows why, damn it!"

Well, my uncle was in town for the holidays. As usual, he was going to stay with his dad, this same grandfather. Turns out the tv has been inoperable for quite some time. "Someone came in and broke it, stole some parts when i was sleeping", he claims. He also said my mom took parts to his blood pressure monitor because she wants him to die so she can get all his money that she has been stealing for years.

So, the old coot has been sitting alone in his apartment, unwilling to talk to anyone and having a broken tv and no radio. Just alone, staring at the walls. Going crazy, apparently.

At first, they thought this was all a mix up with meds. But the doc said the meds he is on could not cause the kind of confusion he is suffering from.

Doc said the confusion might have began around the time he fell and could actually be the onset of the most noticeable signs of dementia. That the moment of the fall when we all think "what the hell just happened" continues for the elderly patient sometimes.

No matter what the cause, he can no longer live by himself.

He is loosing his mind. He's a asshole. But he is my grandfather. Even when i hate him and he is making others suffer, i still love him and don't want him to suffer. Crazy old bastard...