I like rain. I like to dance and play in the rain. But, today, i wish it weren't raining.

We had plans to go sailing with our neighbour, Deb. She wants Kirsten and i to be "rail meat" for a race she is in on Tuesday and wanted us to come see the boat. And maybe take a dip. And, just generally hang out. (e:Uncutsaniflush) was coming along and we were going to have some fun in the sun. We even thought it would be good that it wouldn't be so hot. But rain? *pout*

For now, we wait. Although based on the radar pics, i don't think we should hold our breath....

Your post got me thinking, (e:Krayner03,3) . I have thought about commenting, but i figured i might be too long winded (as usual) and opted for my own post with a link to yours.

I think that often happiness can be perceived as something the simple minded have. That anyone who has deep thoughts must have a hard time not being sad because the world is such a challenging place. Yet i think life can be a challenge and we can still find our happies in it.

I agree with (e:Terry) that anyone that is happy all the time might just be acting part of that time. But, is happiness always that giddy euphoric feeling, or can it simply be a contentment and a satisfaction with life and its ups and downs? Can't happiness just be a generally possitive feeling that the hard times won't last forever and we have the confidence and strength to overcome? Can we not be happy when we are sad?

Perhaps if we don't have unrealistic expectations of ourselves and others, and simply remember we are all erring humans, we might not find ourselves disappointed. Perhaps unmet expectations are allowing us to be sad.

Perhaps i am the simple minded one that thinks it's all possible. Perhaps it is all in the definition of happiness.

Recently, i have been hanging out a lot with Kirsten, my neighbour and now friend... i don't think i fully realized how much i have missed having a friend. Someone who actually gets me. Someone who understands my jokes, thinks i am weird and is ok with it. Boosts me up when i am down and doesn't understand why the whole world isn't beating down my door to be my friend. It feels amazingly good.

We were supposed to go swimming this evening, but the weather disagreed. We got kicked out of the water at Woodlawn Beach by a cop a couple of evenings ago because the lifeguard had already gone home. The night before that, we swam until dusk started. Got bit by skeeters something awful. Had a great time, even if it took me a long time to wash the sea(lake?)weed off my body and out of my hair. I had forgotten how much i love to swim... or, in my case, splash around in water. Damn fun.

Saw the neighbour that lives between us tonight. She wants us to be "rail meat" for a sail race she is in next Tuesday. Invited us to see and hang out on the boat with her this weekend. Looking forward to that. I don't think Kirsten, myself or (e:Uncutsaniflush) are seasick. I reckon we will find out, huh?

Making chalk sounds like fun, (e:Carolinian,21) ! I think my sister in law used to make chalk when her kids were younger. I found out tonight, that Target sells chalk.



They also have sidewalk paint. I wonder if that would be a good outing? Sidewalk painting?!



I didn't bring my camera to the show, so no pics of any Buzzcocks. Oh, i know how you all are so dissappointed. But, i did take this one of the ceiling of the lobby of the Holiday Inn Express we stayed at. Nice place.

Not that anyone but me gives a rat's ass, but I have a new usersound. I put it on gather before i uploaded it as a usersound... only to find out it was too big to be a usersound. Only now did i finally get 'round to asking (e:Uncutsaniflush) if he could help me rip it at... oh... a lower sampling rate (i sooo want to say at a lower resolution, despite me knowing that's wrong!). So now, i have a new usersound. And it's not a Buzzcock's song. But it features Pete Shelley...

Anyhoo, if anyone (other than me and (e:Uncutsaniflush)) is interested, here's the gather info:

Filename:
The_Adored___01___TV_Riot_(Feat._Pete_Shelley_of_the_Buzzcocks_on_Guest_Vocals).mp3
Tracking Number:
0973148001152931718

The Adored opened for Buzzcocks and we thought they were most excellent. Good enought to buy the cds at the merch table at the Buffalo show.

Which was great. As i always want to be when i see a Buzzcock's show, i was right up front where all the action is. Steve Diggle wasn't a complete wanker. A rare thing. The lads all seemed to have a good time... and Pete Shelley was hitting on the guy beside me, so i got next to a cute boy attention.

The next day, we decided that i really wanted to go to the show in Cleveland... not sure if (e:Uncutsaniflush) would have wanted to go if it weren't for me being such a rabid fan.

I'm glad we went. We had a good time.

The hotel was interesting. I took some pics, but i haven't uploaded them yet. I might post them if they turned out ok. It was a Holiday Inn Express a block and a half away from the House of Blues, so no worries about cabs or parking.

The show was good... young... rowdy.... lots of security. It's what i expect but rarely see at a Buzzcock's show. I didn't get too many boots to the head, but there seemed to be a fair amount of crowd surfing in a room that isn't much bigger than.. hmm... maybe a coupla rooms in our house. I was too intent on the stage and having my own fun to worry about the security trying to keep crowd surfers off the stage. Sadly, though, Diggle was a wanker, drunk off his head, unable to keep up or keep in tune, not sure of what song was being played closer to the end of the gig... and it appeared as though Pete Shelley was very annoyed. Or maybe it was just 'cause there was no cute boy beside me...

Last night's Buzzcocks show was great. I sweated up a storm, and the railing snapped the underwire in my bra. I still say it ain't a good punk rock show unless something comes home bruised. This time, it was my bra.

Kirsten needs someone to take care of her kitties this weekend, so i am waiting for her to come over and give me the lowdown on giving Maslow his needles (diabetic kitty).

After that, we will shower... i'm already packed.

We decided this morning to run off to Cleveland to see the Buzzcocks again tonight at the House of Blues. I'm so freakin' excited!!

'nother new user sound.

Yes, sorry bore ya'll, but it is, once again, a Buzzcocks song.

I had the whim to be more of a redhead agin, so while the colour processes on my hair, i thought i would take the time to post...

Not that anyone (but me, and maybe (e:Uncutsaniflush) and/or (e:Twisted) )cares, but i changed my usersound to the Buzzcock's Boredom (thanks for reminding me of boredom from your journal, (e:Lisa,176) ) from the Spiral Scratch E.P... back in the days when Howard Devoto was still the singer. I think i like Pete Shelley's singing (and i use the term singing loosely) voice better.. it cracks and breaks and goes offkey more often than Howard Devotos'... but i'm weird, that's what i like about the Buzzcocks.

Here are a few pics from Sunday night's Shakespeare in the park... thanks for organizing it, imk2 !





I will not make the joke asking which one is the lady and which one is the tramp!!!


Ava and her human, Kirsten came... Ava is the one that hams it up, though...



Ava loved (e:Paul) sooo much... she would have licked his face off if he gave her half a chance. Didn't get any good pics of that, but, i did get a couple of (e:Ladycroft) lovin' on her.


Shame this one didn't have all of Ava in it...

Tickets!



(Yes, (e:Twisted) , i think there are still some left if you have a last minute desire to fly to Buffalo... and that is the "extra" (e:strip) bumper sticker on our 'fridge!)

In honour of said tickets, i have changed my usersound.

The Buzzcocks

Orgasm Addict

You tried it just for once
and found it alright for kicks
but now you've found out
it's a habit that sticks
you're an orgasm addict

Sneaking in the backdoor
with dirty magazines
your mother wants to know
what are those stains on your jeans
you're an orgasm addict

You get in heat
you get in a sulk
but you still keep beating
your meat to pulp
you're an orgasm addict

You're a kid Casanova
you're no Joseph
it's a labour of love
fucking yourself to death
you're an orgasm addict

You're making out with school kids
winos and heads of state
you've even made it with the lady
who puts the little plastic robins
on the Christmas cakes
butchers' assistants and bellhops
you've had 'em all here and there
children of god
and the joy strings
international women with no body hair

So you're asking in an alley
and your voice ain't steady
the sex mechanic's rough
but you're more than ready
you're an orgasm addict

Johnny-want-fuckie
everywhere and all ways
he's got the energy
he will amaze
he's an orgasm addict
he's always at it
he's an orgasm addict

Sadly, today was lost pug day in our humble hood....

It all started when Kirsten knocked on our door. Seems her neighbour's brother found a pug last light and their dog wasn't getting along with her. So, of course, Kirsten volunteered to take her. And, of course, i took pictures...

We took to calling her Stella.





Stella and Ava got along so well..





Later, we decided to take them both out for a walk and while we were in the area she was found, some kids started talking to us. Eventually, it led to Stella finding her humans... and we found out she is called Princess....

Sadly, though, another neighbour lost his pug today. Those little dogs are faster than they look. Poor guy is heartbroken that Luna got out of the fenced yard, even though she was being watched. I hope, like Princess, Luna gets back to her humans!

Quite some time ago, my 'rents got a corporate gift from a supplier that came in a hat box. Something about it i liked, and since then, i have been keeping my hairdressing stuff in it. But it is really only made of heavy duty cardboard, and probably not intended for the kind of use it gets. The hinges are starting to wear out, the clasp to close it barely works..



and i think i have more stuff now than i did when i got it.



So, today, at an estate sale, i found this to replace the old hat box with. I think it may have had one of those old fashioned portable hairdryers in it.




Another estate sale we went to today was near us on Niagara, in an old storefront church. We went to that one because of the promise of musical instruments. And i scored big time. Got this high hat to replace the cheap one that came with my set.




The price on it was 50, but we managed to haggle and got it for 35. (E:Uncutsaniflush) did a bit of research and found out that highhat new could have cost somewhere between 250 - 400... so i really feel that i got a good deal.

So, no hat trick... but it sure was hat day for me. :O)

The same basic topic has been coming up in my life lately. Perhaps i have just been more observant. Maybe i have just been feeling things differently lately. I wonder if i am searching out the subject unknowingly... even though it certainly feels like it is seeking me and not the other way 'round.

I met an interesting person the other night...

After getting semi-rained out at Shakespeare at the Park, (e:Uncutsaniflush) , our neighbour, Kirsten, her dog Ava and i came home. We had a nice picnic in the park with some Chinese take out, but with full bellies and cool rain, we didn't feel like waiting to see if the show would go on.

When we got back to our 'hood, the neighbour that lives in between Kirsten and us had some friends over on her front porch. They were making a ruckus and having a good time like only old(er) stoned hippies can. They had wine and sparkly scarves, nicotine and weed, candles and chocolate. Ava, the ever curious pug lead me straight up the steps of their porch party. I'm glad i went up there.

At one point, Kirsten and Sally were waltzing with formal hats on. We got a semi-self guided tour of the house ("just go in there, i don't feel like walking up the attic stairs"). We discussed the possibility that those leaded glass designs really are an inward pointing penis and testicles on either side of a crest in the front window of the house. I watched a stoned 50 something try, very unsuccessfully, to light candles. And got into an in depth conversation with Sally. A conversation i enjoyed thoroughly, even if i can't remember all the separate bits of it.

Sally "designs museums" and worked on some exhibits at the Natural History Museum. She's currently working on something with the migration of specific birds that spend some, lots, or most of their time at Jamaica Bay.

Meeting her and talking with her was nice, pleasant, and for once, socially, i felt comfortable and at ease almost immediately. I didn't feel judged for not being cool enough, or wearing the right clothes, or knowing the right people or hanging out at the right place. Whether or not the weight of the judgment is self imposed, self imagined or there at all, i feel it regularly, and it was so comfortable to not feel it at all. It was nice, as well, to feel interesting; to have someone interested in something i might have to say. I have had so much major drama in my life in the past, i find myself less inclined to be involved and now, even when i want to be, i no longer feel i know how... and even i find myself boring from time to time.

I remember discussing judgment with her. That she feels she is open minded and free thinking, always available to learn, yet finds herself at places of judgment. That her thinking a 21+ year old woman should know what state Cincinnati is in while mistaking it for being in a completely different state and also an incorrect one is rather... interesting, to say the least. I told her how i felt the weight of judgment the whole time i was in Vancouver, because i didn't fit in well with the trends there; that my kind of vegetarianism (moral based) wasn't good enough for theirs (health based). She mentioned how defensive she can be because she lives in Orchard Park; that not everyone who lives in the 'burbs is a "soccer mom". I told her hoe defensive i can be because i lack formal education; that because i feel inferior for being a highschool drop out, the mere mention, innocent or otherwise, of me not going to college can leave me stinging for days.

Not too long ago, i had a similar conversation about judgment, but all revolving around one specific topic. Weight. We were looking at a chubby dog, talking about how cute she is... and sorta kinda wishing that humans might think chubby humans are cute, too. But more often than not, we aren't. I know that i have referred to myself as a "fat chick". I reckon i do that so i can mock me before others do.

I think it's sad that the overweight are the last segment of the population it's still socially acceptable to openly, and often cruelly, tease. I don't make fun of people that drink too much on a regular basis, why should others make fun of me for eating too much on a regular basis? I don't believe the health effects of eating too much are worse than drinking too much.. but i'm not an expert so i can't say for sure. Is it more socially acceptable to drink too much and have the effects be visible, than it is to eat too much and have the effects be visible? Is it due to the possibility that eating too much shows a more permanent effect?

I understand that for some people, drinking allows them to let go and have a good time. So, i sure as hell don't mean to frown upon those who drink, in moderation or to excess... I know i can have a good time eating too much.

I reckom my whole point here is that i would love it so much if there were no social judgments. It can be fascinating what each one of us finds important in life... and how much that colours what we judge.