a little bit of this that and the other..

• feeling a strong sense of deja vous- or something to that effect. Not sure what to make of the feeling. Not sure where it is coming from, or why.. weird.

• field trip to the Buffalo Zoo tomorrow. Maybe I can find out about those scultptures, (e:shawnr,272) posted about.

Wish me luck, there is a certain amount of dread that accompanies field trips. I do well with the challenges that come about taking the kiddos into the community.. so it isn't *that* dreadful--but I know I have to be on my game, be prepared and ready for anything..

• newest class rocks. Professor intrigues me. Seems pretty intense and thought provoking; just what I needed. yipee! I've been a little bored lately.. so this has really sparked my interest and makes me a little giddy.

• (for my notes)- increasing the output pertaining to a personal challenge. I am data and fact driven..adjustments have been made and I will be sure to follow through on them. darn tenacity..sometimes it get me moving on something, sometimes in gets me in trouble, haha.

• (e:pyrcedgrrl) sent me the link to Consumer Freedom home page:

I have been reading through some of the articles...You may find it of interest. I provide no feedback at this time.

From the "about us" link:

What is the Center for Consumer Freedom? (excerpt)

The Center for Consumer Freedom is a nonprofit coalition of restaurants, food companies, and consumers working together to promote personal responsibility and protect consumer choices.

The growing cabal of "food cops," health care enforcers, militant activists, meddling bureaucrats, and violent radicals who think they know "what's best for you" are pushing against our basic freedoms. We're here to push back.

• It supposed to be toasty this weekend. Maybe sitting on my porch, sipping a home made mojito with fresh gown mint shall be on my to do list ;)

• still looking for a car..

and thats about it.. hope all is well!

Optical Fiber!

Information has been popping up more and more within Computer World, one of my favorite ezines. The intriguing research, feasibility studies and the financial projection of switching to optical fiber from copper cable has left me in nerdy anticipation-for a few years now.

Initial investment is mad expensive- but we all like new, fast stuff, so the return on investment should be pleasing to the compnay who decides to install it. However, it has to be a company who is able to strategically plan for such a grand scale venture. Money, labor, materials, knowledge management, IT, marketing.. are just a few facets of what goes into making this happen. I have been waiting for a company (other than AOL, Time Warner) to jump on this medium, for this area..and atlast, Verizon steps up.

Anyone using fiOS now?? How is it in comparison to DSL or cable?


excerpt from Buffalo News article, Verizon Replacing Copper Phone Lines with Strands of Glass" written by Peter Svensson.

Optical fiber - strands of glass 15 times thinner than a human hair - have been used by telecommunications companies over long-haul routes since the 1980s.

Now, Verizon Communications Inc., is making a big and expensive bet on replacing the network of copper wires that has provided phone service since the 19th century with fiber, giving it the capability to carry TV and super-fast Internet service in the bargain.

In the Buffalo area, phone company crew have begun installing fiber optic cables to homes in Hamburg, Orchard Park and West Seneca.

Lisa Donohue is happy with the service Verizon calls FiOS.

"With cable, the picture would stop. Or we'd have those digital things going," she says, gesturing to mimic the picture breaking up.

The family pays about $220 a month for TV, phone, high-speed Internet service and two cell phones, which she says is cheaper than what they were paying before, when they had cable.

"It comes as one bill, which is nice because I don't have to remember to pay four times," Donohue says.

Factors like that have made Verizon's FiOS TV a success in the few areas where it's available, judging by Verizon's data. It has said that 6.5 percent of households in Massapequa Park signed up for TV in the first three months after its launch on Jan. 24. That figure is disputed by Cablevision Systems Corp., the incumbent cable company, which said it had a net loss of less than 2 percent in the area.

Verizon has permission to sell TV service in about 80 communities in New York, Florida, Massachusetts, Maryland and Virginia. It has fiber available for phone and Internet service in many more - 3 million homes. Verizon doesn't say how many homes are connected, but analysis of a tally by research firm RVA LLC indicates that Verizon had about 400,000 homes connected as of April.

"This is a once-in-a-lifetime project," said Paul Lacouture, Verizon's vice president of engineering and technology.

Chief among fiber's advantages is its almost unlimited capacity to carry information, which Verizon only nibbles at with its current system: It lights fiber to the home with just three laser beams, though the fiber can carry many more.

The single beam that carries video (the others carry data and telephone calls to and from the home) has more capacity than an entire coaxial cable of the kind used by cable companies.

In practical terms, that means better image quality, because the digital TV channels don't need to be degraded to save bandwidth.

Fiber provides almost limitless Internet connection speeds. With current technology, Verizon could provide download speeds of 644 megabits per second, a bigger step up from DSL at 1.5 mbps than DSL is a step up from dial-up.

But for now, the maximum speed Verizon sells is 30 mbps for small businesses, or 20 mbps for homes.

"Right now there are not a lot of applications online that demand 100 megabits," Lacouture said. That's true, but probably in large part due to the lack of home connections at that speed - a chicken and egg situation.

Verizon expects to cut costs for its outside equipment by 40 percent by switching to fiber. But to get there, it has to spend big.

Verizon's average cost of pulling fiber down a street was $1,400 per home at the beginning of last year, not including the cost of actually connecting the homes. The target cost this year is $890 per home, reflecting improvements in materials and techniques. If it reaches its target of laying fiber by another 3 million homes by the end of the year, that's a cost of $2.7 billion - about half of Verizon's annual earnings.

A large part of the cost, however, is labor, which doesn't get cheaper by the month. Drawing fiber along a street involves putting it underground or putting up plastic tubes on the utility poles, then pulling the fiber through the tubes.

Home installation is another cost: the target here is $715 this year, but Verizon has acknowledged that costs are running above that target. It's a big job, at least if TV service is involved. It took the installer all day to get the Donohues up and running, for instance.

Getting a "drop cable" with fiber to the home from the nearest utility pole is the small part. The installer then attaches a large box, called an Optical Networking Terminal, to the side of the house. On the other side of the wall, he installs a backup battery, which should keep the ONT running for six hours if there is a blackout.

Then he strings coaxial cable from the box to the TV sets (Verizon will use existing coax if it's not substandard), Ethernet cable to an Internet router, and a phone line to handsets.

In addition, a small box called a Network Interface Module is installed inside that needs to connect both to the coaxial and Ethernet cables.

"People talk about the risks of doing this," says Michael Render, who tracks fiber buildouts for RVA, the research firm. What they should be talking about, he says, is the risk of not building out fiber. "The world is changing very rapidly."

about Verizon fiOS:

Computer World article (2000), "Users: Optical Fiber Gives Copper a Run for the Money"

"..Verizon could provide download speeds of 644 megabits per second...Right now there are not a lot of applications online that demand 100 megabits...for now, the maximum speed Verizon sells is 30 mbps for small businesses, or 20 mbps for homes..."

ofcourse, I want it all!! Give me the whole 644mbps.. I am sure to have some fun with it. I need it, right?? Limit me to 20-30mbps? as if.

hmmm 644mbps--global domination, here I come. Who's with me? haha :)

I am not sure if I know how to use a paper journal anymore! I seem to have lost the ability to write. I mean, literally- how do I use this thing called a pen?? (heh, and does it have a back space?)

Anyone else have this problem??

How long have you been writing, in any means??

I sit here with a pen and a plain, lined notebook. It is about a quarter full, with the last entry dating back a month. Entries for the past year are scant, although some things needed to be written there as opposed to here or even over at Live Journal.

I used to supplement my paper writing with an occasional post to my LiveJournal, which I have maintained for five or six years now. I have been writing consistently in a paper journals for fifteen years, and not so regularly for over twenty years. I still have almost all of it. I also have a collection of bad poetry, story lines and other writing attempts beyond my personal opinion/thoughts of everything.

It is wild to look back over the years. I havent pulled out the old journals in quite awhile, although I have been meaning to. It is fascinating to see where I have been, as I have been writing since I was 8 years old, atleast. Ha, imagine the stuff you would (or have?) come up with at eight years of age. What would you have written about??

I called my notebook a "diary" (although hated that word and looked for something else) until I was 14, then switched to the term, "journal" and have stuck with that ever since. Now I have to keep myself from calling it a blog, haha.

Anyway, I was in an off mood for awhile earlier. I wrote a semi rant, which turned out to be really pathetic, as my "bad moods" are really nothing notable. I concluded that I am destined to be mentally stable and lovable 363 days out of the year. Forgive me ;)

I had decided to write this so-called rant in another location, such as my paper journal, but suddenly couldn't function with the blank lines and pen in hand. I used to write all of the time. I think I need to walk into a deserted forest and sit down on the mossy earth and re acquaint myself with the pen. I figured that in this past year (ten months, two weeks-if anyone is counting), I have averaged less than one paper entry per month; albeit that when I do write, it is a locquacious entry, but those who have been on the receiving end, know that my electronic posts, comments and emails tend to run on the lengthy side :)

So here I am, writing in (e:strip) and all is right with my world again. Ahh, backspace, you are my friend.

(e:Paul) , what have you done? ;)

...and whatever it is, thank you very much for doing it, your efforts are much appreciated!

I made my annual appearance at the artfest with (e:pyrcedgrrl)


Other than last minute Christmas shopping, it is one of the few times that I purposely set out to be amongst hordes of people. I don't go to eat, drink or buy anthing that the vendors* are selling. In the past, I have enjoyed looking at and thoughtfully thinking about some of the art on display. This year, the creative offerings were scant and the amount of people meandering about were high.

If I wanted a large wooden sign that told me which direction Parrot Bay and Margaritaville were located, then I was in business. For anything else, I had to work my way into the tents and quickly get my visual fill before being edged out back into the masses.

I enjoyed this, I really did. I choose to come each year, and even with this years excess volume, I stayed for a good amount of time. Even so, it was a bit insane at times, with the plethora of baby carriages and piles of conversationalists standing in the center of the already overly crowded walking area.

I thought it would be useful to have the set of water gun-oozies that I contemplated buying at BJs the night before. I entertained the idea of taking people out via a really good super-soaking- yet I would tell them first: "You have been targeted for annihilation" - ok, I admit I said this out loud a few times...

(I am a peaceful person, but I have this creative-fun imagination that makes for an odd combination at times.)

Eventually this thought morphed into the creation of a computer game. I envsioned the art festival as a kung fu fighting SIMS game. (I put in a few practice high kicks for authenticity) I have all of the details in my head and did a fairly good job of expaining my thoughts to (e:pyrcedgrrl) while we were wading through the crowd. If I could just get the ideas that are in my head, out. Oh, I can see the details..

I did see a few (e:peeps) today from a far. (e:zobar) and (e:dragonlady7) were so close, yet so far away! I didn't try to make it five feet over to where the both of you were--I am not sure if I would have made it in time! (e:metalpeter) was spotted as well- I don't have a loud enough voice for you to have heard my 'shout'. Other than that and a few non-peep friends, I was surprised that I didn't encounter more friends than I did.

Before leaving the area, we stopped into the co-op. I was in much need of my beloved french indigo lentils- I havent found them anywhere but the co-op so far. I've either been binging on lentils or my last trip was not the stock piling I made it out to be, as I couldn't find any in my cupboards (indigo variety).

Gleefully I made my way to the bulk section. I made sure to double bag before filling it with two pounds of the dark beans. As I tossed the bag into my cart, I hear the sound of two pounds of lentils cascading onto the floor. I quickly grabbed the torn bag and managed to save approximately a pounds worth. A worker came over and cleaned up the carnage, and I wandered off, wondering if they tossed them in the garbage or tossed them back into the lentil bin?

Not sure if I believe that it is Sunday night already. It felt like the weekend just begun!

Just a reminder that "An Inconvenient Truth" is showing this coming Friday-- (e:theecarey,166)

Good night everyone!

• (Please note that the term, "vendor" has replaced "artist", in that over the past year (and more notably this year), that there is much more of the former than of the latter.)

I knew it!!

I rarely answer my phone if I do not recognize the name or number. In the past month or so, I have received numerous phonecalls from a credit agency.This company never leaves messages and I really have no idea what they would be calling for, unless it is a wrong number, or for another reason that I can't wrap my mind around.

I pay all of my bills on time and I have no outstanding debt other than my student loans. I do have a little sitauation with Blockbuster, but correspondance has been through snail mail. I am banned from the Blockbuster in Lewiston for supposedly not returning some lame ass movie I rented months ago. They can't seem to believe that I returned it with the other movies and that one of their employees must have walked off with it. (I pushed it into drop slot and went on my way.. ) So yeh, once I have time I feel like devoting to this matter, I will write them back, or buy a $5 copy of said lame ass movie and shove up their... movie return slot ;)

anyhow, the credit agency call has perplexed me.

Until I began thinking about it..

I began to feel a little paranoid with where my thought process was taking me..

I have mentioned the so-called stalker in prior posts.

I mentioned that he finally made contact a month or so ago. (e:Theecarey,160)

Then he stopped.

But then this credit agency number has been popping up on my caller id.

And this agency never leaves messages, although I know they call.

Just like this guy who calls.

And so today, I was surprised to hear a message from him.

"Hi Carey, its ******; just calling to say how pretty you are.."

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

and

then I thought to check my caller id.

His number didn't show up.

But that credit agency number does.

heh. coincidence?

I think he works for a bill collector now, no?

And bill collectors have fabulous search tools..

k- just thought I would publicly document it while I was thinking about it.


seriously, do you think it is harmless or reason for concern?

I don't feel threatened.. I just think he is infatuated.

Maybe he thinks he is being sweet?

I don't want this to be a reason for concern...

oy.

k- off to watch Office Space for the fifth time this week :)

I was going through files on my very old desktop computer when I happened upon a small selection of e-mail that I apparently saved many years ago. I was surprised to find these, as when I did save an email, it was to the "filing cabinet" of AOL, uh, 4.0? haha.

So almost eight years ago these emails were written back and forth between myself and then "boy friend", now special friend of mine, whom I am still in occasional contact with. I wish I had more than what I do, if only for the time frame in which all this occured and that he and I have always had a spectacular rapport--he now married with kid, etc. We simply talked about everything. Although it was deep and multidimensional, it still had that "when I grow up" quality to it.

I havent read through all of them yet, even though I only have a few. It will be interesting to see where I was at in my thinking and observations of life, eight years ago. In the past couple of days, I have pondered the changes that have occured within me not only in the past few years (which have been significant) but those over my lifetime. How easily my life could have taken a few different directions (not for better) and I contemplate which points in my life were the catalysts for change (for the better).

I found a few other random emails and word documents written in a journal entry type fashion. I am always reticent to read old writings. Yet my curiosity of where I have been usually takes over- in which I read, ruminate then eventually write some more.

On that note, I will end this post. I leave you with a.. "poem"? My friend shared it with me so many years ago. At the time, I thought it was sweet, yet it didn't really mean anything to me, and didn't really get why he shared it with me. Funny that despite that, I remembered the first line of the poem over these years. It is only now that I decided to try to find the entire story. What motivated me was that I saw reference to it in one of the emails; and out of curiouslty, I looked for it.

Now I get it.

It is very simple and sappy.. but it made me teary eyed, I admit--which surprises me a bit.

And that is a reminder of the changes within, over time.




ROSES FOR MY VALENTINE

Red roses were her favorites, her name was also Rose.
And every year her husband sent them, tied with pretty bows.

The year he died, the roses were delivered to her door.
The card said, "Be my Valentine," like all the years before.

Each year he sent her roses, and the note would always say,
"I love you even more this year, than last year on this day."
"My love for you will always grow, with every passing year."
She knew this was the last time that the roses would appear.

She thought, he ordered roses in advance before this day.
Her loving husband did not know, that he would pass away.
He always liked to do things early, way before the time.
Then, if he got too busy, everything would work out fine.
She trimmed the stems, and placed them in a very special vase.
Then, sat the vase beside the portrait of his smiling face.
She would sit for hours, in her husband's favorite chair.
While staring at his picture, and the roses sitting there.

A year went by, and it was hard to live without her mate.
With loneliness and solitude, that had become her fate.
Then, the very hour, as on Valentines before,
The doorbell rang, and there were roses, sitting by her door.
She brought the roses in, and then just looked at them in shock.
Then, went to get the telephone, to call the florist shop.
The owner answered, and she asked him, if he would explain,
Why would someone do this to her, causing her such pain?

"I know your husband passed away, more than a year ago,"
The owner said, "I knew you'd call, and you would want to know."
"The flowers you received today, were paid for in advance."
"Your husband always planned ahead, he left nothing to chance."
"There is a standing order, that I have on file down here,
And he has paid, well in advance, you'll get them every year.
There also is another thing, that I think you should know,
He wrote a special little card...he did this years ago."
"Then, should ever, I find out that he's no longer here,
That's the card...that should be sent, to you the following year."

She thanked him and hung up the phone, her tears now flowing hard.
Her fingers shaking, as she slowly reached to get the card.
Inside the card, she saw that he had written her a note.
Then, as she stared in total silence, this is what he wrote...

"Hello my love, I know it's been a year since I've been gone,
I hope it hasn't been too hard for you to overcome."
"I know it must be lonely, and the pain is very real.
For if it was the other way, I know how I would feel.
The love we shared made everything so beautiful in life.
I loved you more than words can say, you were the perfect wife."

"You were my friend and lover, you fulfilled my every need.
I know it's only been a year, but please try not to grieve.
I want you to be happy, even when you shed your tears.
That is why the roses will be sent to you for years."

"When you get these roses, think of all the happiness,
That we had together, and how both of us were blessed.
I have always loved you and I know I always will.
But, my love, you must go on, you have some living still."

"Please...try to find happiness, while living out your days.
I know it is not easy, but I hope you find some ways.
The roses will come every year, and they will only stop,
When your door's not answered, when the florist stops to knock."

"He will come five times that day, in case you have gone out.
But after his last visit, he will know without a doubt,
To take the roses to the place, where I've instructed him,
And place the roses where we are, together once again."

-Author Unknown

• My sweet, dear, co-worker who has a heart of gold and is someone I truly admire and enjoy working with, mentiond yesterday that she is very superstitious of 666.

heh 06-06-06

(btw, I dig the theme, (e:paul) )

So, like the supportive co worker that I am---


She arrived at work this morning to find her locker plastered with devil horns, upside down crosses and flames. (I work in a school, staff get lockers as well as the kiddos).

We love you Melissa.

I truly fear your retaliation, yet I look forward to it. You only look sweet and innocent :)

• On a related note, I found myself at Walmart yesterday watching Jerry Springer; "Beer Belly Brawlers" had my undivided attention. How does it go..? "Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!" (e:vincent) and (e:pyrcedgrrl) received exclusive texts of this news. Dont be jealous! ;)

To think, that only now do I realize what I have been missing (and in my 30 years, thats ok with me). I never watched it before, although I knew enough about the show to keep me from doing just that. I never watched much day time tv as the talk shows seemed like something that would stress me out. I am not a fan of the explosion of so-called reality tv, either.

How did I happen upon Jerry?

Leaving work I noticed that my front passenger tire had a large bulge. I went to the nearest tire place to have it replaced...

Walmart took my car keys and proceeded to hold my car hostage for two hours. Refusing to use the time to go shopping, I sat in the waiting area and amused myself with reading about the worker qualifications plastered on the wall, tire repair guides, and the rivoting reading of cardboard boxes full of "lounge coffee" placed under the greasy coffee maker. After I was through with that entertainment, I turned to the televison, set to Jerry Springer.

I tried not to look. I really didn't want to.. but I did. At first I just glanced at the tv. Then I began to watch a little more out of the corner of my eye, then I found myself settled into the waiting room chair, watching the show with full attention. I was laughing too much.. people ripping their clothes off, hitting each other, putting each other down, etc. I assume this is classic Jerry? However, this was a one time deal.

Shortly after the show, I found myself wandering the store. I come back with: One fitted sheet, a 74oz water jug and a note pad. (*does not mention 12 seasons of Jerry Springer on DVD* hehe- kidding )

Whatever, I was sucked in to wandering the store. Immediately after the purchase, my car was done. Coincidental?

I said that I wanted to take my tire home with me (I am sentimental..)-- actually, I intend to show my regular car person this sudden bulge. I also mentioned that under no circumstances are they to move my front seat forward, for if they do, I will not be able to re adjust the seat and will have to drive with my knees up on the dashboard (my car is sweet--want to buy it? haha). They took note of that..

Now, of four doors, only two open. Drivers door and rear passenger. I kneeled on the chair and watched through the waiting room window as the mechanic tried to put the tire into my car. From the driver door, he attempted to unlock the back door. When that did not happen, he tried unlocking the back door by reaching into the back seat and playing with the lock. He tried this a few times, before going around to the front passenger side (also permenantly locked) to try to get that door open. After that failed attempt, he opened the trunk. My trunk is already full of stuff (and it looked like something jumped out at him), so there was no room for the tire there. I didn't know what he decided to do next as I was called up to pay my bill.

What I concluded is that he did not try the only remaining option- the rear passenger door, as when I went to retrieve my car, the tire was propped up against my car. I picked it up, went around the side of the car and tossed it into the backseat. At that point I noticed that I had one Nisson hubcap put on my car- I drive a Pontiac. (atleast for a few more days..I am looking into buying another car asap-besides, I need something worthy to place my (e:strip) bumper stickers on!).

I giggled and drove away.

• To unwind after the Walmart Adventure and to replace the Springer visuals that are most likely burned into my retinas, I headed into Fort Niagara. Feeling a little 'tired', I figured a brisk walk would re energize me. There were so many people there, that I felt like my territory had been invaded. After I took note of the high proportion of mini vans, I concluded that the soccer moms and dads were taking home their aspiring little athletes. Soccer and yachting season is big around these parts- I look forward to Level Regatta weekend every year. A weekend of sailboat races towards the end of July. It brings in people from all over the place!

Fortunately the park was clearing out as I headed in. I just have to remind myself that the state park is not mine; that I have to share.. atleast for the summer months :)

As always, the Niagara River was gorgeous! I walked all over the park, up and down hills, viewed the early part of the sunset over Lake Ontario and kept on walking until it became almost too dark to see. I stood on top of the giant sledding hill and enjoyed the warm raindrops. An hour or so later, I headed back home..

Now I wrap up this post and try to muster the mental energy to work on a school project...

Later, peeps

Carey

I was wrong.

I left a comment in (e:carolinian,3) post regarding Niagara Mohawk, er, excuse me.. National Grid online payment services. National Grid has been fine so far. I wote about my observation that the site is not user friendly and is not conucive to making a quick and easy payment; something that is beneficial to both the company (they get their money) and the customer (you get it out of the way and don't have to search for or steal stamps from friends 'cause you are too lazy to go to the PO.)


How am I mistaken?

Well, I just went online to pay my National Fuel bill. It is their site that is the enigma. It is kind of like a treasure hunt (something I would normally really like), however as you navigate the site (take a guess as to where you pay your bill), that once you finally arrive and have 13 pages across the bottom of your browser, the prize is that you get to pay your bill. Not quite what I expect from a treasure hunt. I should atleast be presented with a balloon and maybe some words of wisdom. Or some ibuprofen.

Or a view of an on going log of how much time it takes me to find my bill each time. Customers could try to beat their own score. oh, make it a competition across all customers! Highlight reel score, baby! There can be month end commentary on the strategies used to get to the bill paying portion of the site. And for some, a support group.

hmmm, I am thinking that we could write a book, a users manual of the sort, well, better yet, a playbook.

Official Strategy Guide for Paying Your Bills Online: National Fuel and National Grid. heh, they're both four letter words


:)

I found a bunch of old toys and trinkets from my childhood. A near future post will reveal a few of those items. Besides those things, I thought about other childhood memories of toys, hobbies and even candy. Which brings me to this post.

I remember chewing Bazooka bubble gum


and reading the comics contained inside the wrapper.


Does anyone remember opening the wrapper and having, instead of a comic, a note that said "help, i am trapped in a bubble gum factory" ??

hehe, I hope it was a joke..



And then remember these... How I LOVED candy cigarettes


I never saw this.. crazy!


heh, and I really wanted to be a smoker. No one in my family smoked, but my mom had a couple of friends who did. I would watch them and then imitate their smoking by using a straw. It was extra special and fun when I could go buy a pack of candy cigarettes or a "carton" (six boxes wrapped together). I would puff on them with no control. An open pack of candy cigarettes were quickly "smoked". At like, 4 years of age how cool did I think I was..

sad.

Fortunately, I realized by the time I was 12 that real second hand cigarette smoke maked me ill. I get nauseaus, irritated, red eyed, and over all ill feeling when i am around it. 98% of the time it has this effect on me. Fortunate that it kept me from smoking. Not fortunate in that it can be annoying to not be able to handle being around smokers for long. I guess that isn't a bad thing either.. just makes it difficult to ignore, and difficult when people think you are looney for getting headaches around cig smoke.

Anyway, I am a non smoker and always have been, but really wanted to when I was a kid.


I am sure these are still made..
Fun Dip. Straight to the point, I like it!



I used to buy Dinosaur eggs. They came in a package of two and were pretty big, I think (I was five years old, ofcourse they were big!). They had a gobbstopper type of texture. I always purchased them at a small store in St. Catherines and not sure if I ever bought them anywhere else. I couldn't find any pictures as I hoped.

And thats about it. What are you childhood candy memories?

Actually, my original post was a comment to (e:metalpeter,654) who I began writing quite a bit in his comment section, then decided to trasnfer it to a post, but then my computer froze and everything disappeared. So now that I have no functioning brain cells at this point in the night, I wont be getting back to those thoughts! Definitely later..

heh, I think I spelled every other word wrong.

Bed time.

Good night peeps :)

I look forward to the weekend, although I have no specific plans as of yet. I know that (e:pyrcedgrrl) wants to get together. Have you come up with something you would like to do, my dear? I have a few ideas bouncing around in my head; and no, they do not include scaling sides of buildings, climbing mountains or swimming.. to Toronto. At least not this weekend ;)

Most days of the week I go for a walk or bike ride. My walks usually include going up and down hills and hidden staircases. When I am feeling rather ambitious, I will run up the hills, some of which are fairly steep. Now that I am at that point, I will start carrying my back pack with a small amount of weight and systematically increase the weight over time. This is to increase the challenge and also to have me better prepared for longer day-overnight hikes, where I will be carrying more gear. I can run up and down hills all I want, but if I am not able to maintain energy and endurance with the added weight, then it is not conducive to the more hard core activities I intend to engage in this summer and fall.

For the past couple of months I have been spending less time out at night (unless star gazing) and more time out during the day. I have ventured out to many places, locally and within a two hour drive. Usually it revolves around being outdoors; however, I like to incorporate a museum, art gallery, or other creative facet into my jaunt. Often I head out with no destination in mind other than somewhere that I can hike and think. I usually go alone, although I am always meeting people on my excursions.

One recent weekend, I walked/hiked/jogged along the canal for eight plus miles and at some point paced myself with gentlemen out on a kayak. We chatted for about a mile before I needed to resume my brisk speed. I thought that I should start jotting down notes from the conversations that I have been part of and/or observations about the people I have met. It is fascinating to talk to people and know that that is probably the only time I will ever talk or see them again. I never make an attempt to carry it beyond that moment. I enjoy these situations for what they are: transitory, momentary connections, information seeking, sharing and energetic.

I find myself in seemingly random encounters with people in all sorts of settings. Such as nature trails, store aisles, restaurant waiting areas, bathrooms, wherever two people passing might occur; male female, young, old.

When I know I want to do something, I just go out and do it. It would be nice to be accompanied on some of my excursions, yet it does not stop me from doing the things I want to do. Having a friend join me is a bonus to the experience not a prerequisite. Due to my spontaneous behavior, I often head out without seeing if anyone wants to go with me. My free time, outside of work and school responsibilities, I seek to experience, learn (unlearn) and live. I am pretty much open to anything; why not give something a try? Or do more of what I like to do?

Such as: canoeing, kayaking, climbing, hiking, biking, camping, anything with balls, day trips, longer road trips, orienteering, museums, art galleries, drawing, writing, problem solving, conversations, cross country skiing, swimming, playing, music, movies, lunches, etc..

I have found that over the past few years (+) that I have tried new activities and have been progressing back to my old self (with some major improvements), since the injury. It is deeply satisfying to recall how I went from a state of being unable to get through regular daily activities and the complete psychological darkness that surrounded that time, to the ability to do everything that I have done before plus so much more. Support, tenacity and the refusal to settle for what was, fueled my perseverance in getting better, stronger and back to normal. I am pretty much better all the way around. I am strong again, I am feeling rather fit in regards to grip strength, flexibility, lung capacity, endurance and energy. I gained a lot, weight wise, during the recovery phase and have since removed a large portion of that. (I have mentioned a little about this in previous entries)I am 75% of the way there-- that is an amazing feat in itself. I have to try to keep a positive attitude. These days I get a little irked with myself and so I just can't allow that. I keep on nourishing my body and being active, and the rest will take care of itself.

I think that time in my life really tweaked my attitude and gave me a great sense of calm on many matters in life. Getting through that situation, along with my current place of employment (first job after the injury), my grad school program and all the people I have had the fortune to meet have directly impacted the person who I have become, and am becoming. It is strange to look back and know what has changed within yourself. At times I feel very vulnerable but it reminds me that I am human; someone who makes mistakes says the wrong thing, says too much, has 'off' days, feels things, gets hurt, yet is strong, laughs, is passionate about life and truly cherishes the people within my life, even if I don't always say it or show it ( I am still learning, friends).

So, get out and try new things. Perhaps try something outside of your comfort zone?

Maybe it is taking a long evening walk, hiking the continental divide (who's with me?), or looking at something in a different perspective.
Maybe it will be taking a different route home from work.
Or having a cup of green tea instead of coffee.
Or listening to unfamiliar music.
Or letting the dirty dishes go until the next day (or for me, doing the dirty dishes the same night!)

Or relaxing with friends on a hot Memorial Day, eating ice cream cones and sipping cold soda. Pop. Sodapop. I interchange them, but I grew up saying "pop". What do you call it?

For those that are familiar with the northern Niagara region will know about Brownies, an ice cream stand out in Wilson. Not sure if it has had other names, but everyone knows where it is at. I remember going there as a kid, and occasionally I still stop for custard. I met up with a few friends this past Monday at Brownies. It was nice to sit and relax after a long hot day.


Well, we had a few toasty days. I think it is supposed to drop 20 degrees on Thursday, which will feel cold, haha. I don't care what the weather is, as it rarely stops me from doing what I want to do (e:theecarey,169) Although I am more inclined to kick back on a hot sweaty day rather than engage in a major sweatfest. No thats not true,lol. I tackled some crazy projects Sunday, Monday and Tuesday.. almost lost a finger, but thats another story :)

I think this picture will load. I had a bit of trouble re sizing it. Right now, it is the only picture from my grad ceremony that I have loaded to this computer.

It might turn out to be super tiny. I am sure you can figure out which one is me--long brown kinda straight/wavy hair.