"Nutshell" written by Vincent on estrip.org

09/19/10 11:08 - 52.ºF - ID#52784

Nutshell

I went to see Deftones and Alice in Chains last night in Toronto. It was a great show and I'll post more in the future from it. But I need to get this off of my chest now.

For me I've had self love / self esteem issues for most of my life now. When I saw this song last night it has basically opened up the floodgates. I haven't listened to anything from Jars of Flies for years as I never bought the CD even though I should. I've always had more of an emotional connection with Alice in Chains than any other "Grunge" era band. Dirt embedded itself into my mind right when it came out. I don't want to get into details about it from back in the day but it fired on all cylinders. So needless to say I've been crying uncontrollably since I got back from Toronto tonight. What's even crazier is I had a total heart felt breakthrough conversation with them as I'm just in a very vulnerable place right now. Anyway here it is music starts at 1:20

Here is a the facebook update that I never bothered to post:

Holy Shit! This song last night just took me to an emotional place that I've been avoiding for a decade. It was the one spiritual experience that I've been seeking all this summer concert season. Sorry if it's TMI but I've had self love issues for most of my life, Lane so tapped into how it feels even though I guess he was writing about his addition. Plus I haven't listened to anything off of Jars of Flies for years.

If you want the original version with Layne

Lyrics

We chase misprinted lies
We face the path of time
And yet I fight
And yet I fight
This battle all alone
No one to cry to
No place to call home

Oooh...Oooh...
Oooh...Oooh...

My gift of self is raped
My privacy is raked
And yet I find
And yet I find
Repeating in my head
If I can't be my own
I'd feel better dead

Oooh...Oooh...
Oooh...Oooh...

Permalink: Nutshell.html
Words: 372
Location: Youngstown, NY
Last Modified: 09/19/10 11:37

Category: urban exploration

09/14/10 12:00 - 58.ºF - ID#52731

Abandoned Amusement Park

I came across this randomly tonight and thought that it was pretty cool. It kind of reminds me of Crystal Beach and Olcott Beach. I have no idea why I am so drawn to abandoned amusement parks. Maybe it was abandoned around the time I was born and just slowly decayed or something along those lines. But WOW!

Permalink: Abandoned_Amusement_Park.html
Words: 59
Location: Youngstown, NY
Last Modified: 09/14/10 12:00

Category: driving

09/11/10 12:15 - 68.ºF - ID#52706

How the F do you do that?

These must be the same kind of D-F**K's that flip and wreck on the 198 thinking that it's a "Real Highway" while in reality the speed limit should be 45 mph.

But seriously how do you do that unless you're doing around 50 mph? Allen St really doesn't want cars on it, that's why you hold your breath driving down it as you're praying that you keep your side view mirrors.

Permalink: How_the_F_do_you_do_that_.html
Words: 77
Location: Youngstown, NY
Last Modified: 09/11/10 12:15

Category: concerts

09/10/10 08:04 - 62.ºF - ID#52697

Beach House

Here is the 2nd band from Vampire Weekend, Beach House. Needless to say when I'm down in the SRQ this winter I will be listening to this when I'm walking on Siesta Key / Crescent Beach. Not because of the name of the band although that helps, but I just love the "dream pop" sound...

Permalink: Beach_House.html
Words: 68
Location: Youngstown, NY
Last Modified: 09/10/10 08:07

Category: concerts

09/08/10 09:21 - 60.ºF - ID#52684

Vampire Weekend

I went last night to Toronto after work and treated myself to a Molson Canadian Amphitheatre Show. I couldn't find anyone to go with me and with the venue being only 40% sold I was lucky to unload my ticket at the gate, even though it was less than cost.

What counted was I was able to make the show for the two bands I wanted to see as I left Buffalo at 5 after work, hung out at the MCA until midnight taking in the big city hipsters, getting home at 1:30 AM and then making it to work this morning 10 minutes early. Needless to say that everything lined up for me as I had a pretty descent time even by myself.

Anyway I was finally able to get floor tickets and take a video that is worth of being one of the "cool" kids at the Amphitheatre:

or if that doesn't work here is the HD link

The only downside is that my battery conked out shortly thereafter and I also realized that my backup was drained as well :-( Anyway watching and dancing hit the spot for all that I have been going through mentally these days anyway.

Permalink: Vampire_Weekend.html
Words: 209
Location: Youngstown, NY
Last Modified: 09/08/10 09:28

Category: concerts

08/30/10 09:17 - 77.ºF - ID#52614

CNE/Ontario Place

So this is the CNE and Ontario Place during and after hours post concert.

Amex Pavilion

Self Explanatory

The Original Hockey Hall of Fame, now part of BMO Field

People Mooching Wifi @ the EX

Permalink: CNE_Ontario_Place.html
Words: 118
Location: Youngstown, NY
Last Modified: 08/30/10 09:20

Category: concerts

08/30/10 12:22 - 67.ºF - ID#52606

City and Colour

Dallas Green put on a great show Saturday Night. For some reason his music just hits me right to the core. Maybe I'm just bummed about my physical health, getting old, never figuring out life ect. But pretty much all of his set hit the spot with me. The whole night was almost perfect. I picked up a friend of mine who unfortunately is even more bummed out (a friend of her's thinks that she's possessed, but I'm going into any religious debate.) The CNE, Molson Canadian Amphitheatre, the hotel indigo, lunch at Mr. Greek.

I've come to the realization that over the last year I just hate a lot of things about my living situation and you could even expand it to the area in general. Right now I don't know what I'm going to do or even how my quality of life is going to be. All I know is I just want to have fun now and forget about tomorrow.

Permalink: City_and_Colour.html
Words: 165
Location: Youngstown, NY
Last Modified: 08/30/10 12:22

Category: horses

08/25/10 09:19 - 68.ºF - ID#52568

Wife Exacta

This is just too funny. Really, The race really starts at 1:00

Permalink: Wife_Exacta.html
Words: 12
Location: Youngstown, NY
Last Modified: 08/25/10 09:19

Category: clothes

08/20/10 10:04 - 67.ºF - ID#52484

Fashion Mistake

So I realized today after it was too late that I projected the wrong image by the clothes I put on this morning. Basically I wore a plain white T-Shirt since it was clean & topped it off with a Black Chicago White Sox Hat. Needless to say for some odd reason I felt out of place out in the Burbs in the morning and when I was walking and driving around the city later on in the afternoon I felt even more out of place. Basically I my clothes on many teenage boys on random street corners. The topping was when a group of African-American men in a Cadillac SUV were laughing at me was I crossed in front on them at a stoplight. Usually it would happen organically, but today I knew exactly what they were focused on.

heidi writes at 03:28:01 08/21/10 - Comment #57938: (e:tinypliny) - something like this :::link::: counts as dressed up, especially with a pantsuit.

tinypliny writes at 12:19:25 08/21/10 - Comment #57933: And I absolutely detest that you sound like a clippety clop horse gallop on heels. I need to get something to choke the sound out of these heels.

tinypliny writes at 12:15:03 08/21/10 - Comment #57932: Hmm... I wish I had more fashion in my life. I just think it's too tiresome sometimes to worry about it - not to mention the uncomfortable and damaging footwear that comes with the state of fashion.

I have been trying to walk in a paltry 2" heel for some days now and I feel as if the air 2" above is toxically dizzying, that I am going to fall on my nose, that my toes are being murdered in cold blood with a hot axe, that my lower back is complaining to my brain and the spinal cord is conveying the coup messages, that I am committing feet homicide, that I am selling out - all at ones. I have returned no less than 3 shoes through this ordeal. The thing is, I am absolutely convinced that most women are completely unaware of what they are doing to their feet when they wear these monstrosities. The big irony is that the realization is making it even more difficult for me to adjust to the heels.

Aaaargh I hate fashion conventions that say that sneakers are not equivalent to "dressing up". What I really want to do is to defend in bare feet - but then I will have to go and get a pedicure, I suppose.

metalpeter writes at 09:14:34 08/21/10 - Comment #57930: Not sure where you where. But don't people wear white shirt and Yankee's cap with jeans all over NYC. I'm sure if you would have a just carried a skate board you would have fit right in, HA kidding. Yesterday in the falls I saw two cops and a bunch of skateboarders. I thought I wonder if they got that way for being young and doing something, I'm guessing for skating and not doing anything wrong. My point is you had a certain look not sure what that look is and how it compares to where you were, but if it is comfy then fine........

paul writes at 10:57:13 08/20/10 - Comment #57927: I always look stupid and I am sure people laugh. I don't care anymore. One day I realized I had a collared shirt on inside out with the collar tucked in and one leg if my jeans tucked into my sick.

Permalink: Fashion_Mistake.html
Words: 139
Location: Youngstown, NY
Last Modified: 08/20/10 10:04

Category: life

08/09/10 01:15 - 69.ºF - ID#52403

Old Emails

I was cleaning out my gmail account when I realized that years ago I received some interesting monumental text messages that I had forwarded myself to save. All I can say is good thing that i did, as there were some insightful things in there.

The best ones are the old pics from the Cont. All I can say is I realize now why people do porn, it's to immortalize their youth. Needless to say I am pretty happy that I took some pics from the old fetish nights ;-)