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Category: reflection

05/07/09 01:53 - ID#48619

e:vincent and The Summit Park Mall

Z Cavaricci! LOL!!!

Wow, (e:vincent,48610) your post just took me back 17 years or so!
agreed (e:paul)- awesome journal (e:vincent). Of course, I really had been there pretty much at the same time as you! This is the only time that a mall brings positive feelings.

I wrote a comment in response, but found it getting much too long, so I've opted to post it as a journal (pretty much everything written here was in the comment box!). I kept writing because I simply found myself sitting here thinking back to those days and how a single public structure was the catalyst for so much fun experience and later nostalgia.

Please don't mind my piggy-backing off your post, (e:vincent). All kudos to you for mentioning it!

And so, I have to chime in, as should (e:ladycroft) and (e:pyrcedgrrl)!

The arcade located at the main entrance that also housed the food court was the hub of activity for 12-17 year olds. Walking back and forth ('doing laps')along the simple one floor straight stretch layout provided mass opportunity for socialization, flirting and following/keeping track of cute guys/gals from both our home school and local area schools we'd yet to know about. (ie; "Sweet Home, where is that?!'- is it long distance to call you?")

Shopping was the least of the activities, although when we (girls) did, it was off to "The Limited" for the highly coveted Forenza and OutBack Red (brand tags were on the outside allowing proof of brand purchase) The shoe store, "Whites" was the only place to buy our Tretorns and penny loafers. Any place else even if the same brand, was not the approved protocol. We used our status symbol post-purchase empty store bags to carry our gym clothes to (and through the) school. I'm thinking some people still do- and it has nothing to do with recycling.

It was more than ok to be a 'preppy'- so at the time it was considered a really good thing to visually blend in. I was a full blown "preppy"- and like everyone else, raised my nose in the air to anyone who was a "grub". In a nutshell, it was more than clothes- being preppy embodied being on the honor roll, being active in clubs, not smoking cigarettes, being clean looking and shopping the "in" stores. Oh and the appearance of money (I gag on all this now, snicker at those still holding close those 'values', but I digress.) A Grub was essentially the opposite. They stood outside before and after school sneaking cigarettes, wore a lot of dark non descript clothing, had mediocre or poor grades, but were probably much more authentic in comparison. Obviously there are much more deeper levels to the difference and sameness of each 'category', and what any of that really meant- but I'm relaying what I remember of the perceptions of a 15 year old. However, even then I remember that my thoughts, actions and words often belied a much more wise and non conformist undertone- a non-preppiness, I guess. I recall you stood out from the crowd in that manner as well. I always appreciated that in you and the small handful of others that existed.

anyway, back to the mall....
How often a bunch of kids would walk back and forth between the interior mall cinema and the "general cinema" across the street, to see where the best movies and movie times were? That theater has been long gone, sadly.

I remember having 'dinner and a movie' dates at that York Steak house you mentioned and then walking across the hall to the theater. One time in particular I remember seeing, the River Phoenix film "A Night in the Life of Jimmy Rearden" with Todd K. on a date. His mom was with us! We were 13.

As for McCrory's-yeh, that was a cool little crap store, one of the first stores anyone would see after leaving the food court, and just to the side of the cinema. And yes, (e:vincent) the image of the ICEE machine still is still clear in my memory. It was convenient to wander in there and stock up on candy before heading into the theater. Also, it was the store that many kids tried out their first stealing attempts.

Many of my mall adventures were with (e:ladycroft). It was a big thing for us to head out to the mall on a friday night. Our parents were often reticent to drive us, so we would often beg her bigger sister to take us along with her on her way to work, which was at the mall! (a shoe store, maybe Payless, i think?)

the main mall entrance had/has a convenient and safe spot to quickly pull up and drop off then later pick up. good times!

(e:ladycroft) and I usually bought and shared a cheap order of fries and a drink from Tijuana Taco during the course of the evening. Any other money we brought with us was usually wasted at the Arcade. I wonder how many miles we logged walking that mall?

You pegged the time line correctly in it going down-hill from 1994 on. I remember working there at GNC, and sometimes I would be shipped over the The Factory Outlet (now Prime Outlets or something like that). And I hated going over there because it was a dead mall. No one was ever there! It looked like it was sure to close, especially compared to the ever hopping Summit Park Mall. Then.... the two situations switched. The Summit became a dying mall and the Outlet began to thrive.

The construction of The Galleria Mall in '89 didn't help matters, it seemed.

I've been in "The Summit" a few times this year for some small business work shops. I thought it interesting that the mall held very few stores but several community related sites and a barrage of mall walkers. I thought that this could be a very good thing if marketed correctly. That it should be used less as a walk-in take a chance shopping complex (ie traditional mall) and more of a dedicated spot of specific and/or business & community offerings. Something that people go their intentionally. Also, the building and lots are clean, lots of parking, convenient location, a structure that is still in great condition and is aesthetically pleasing etc.. I wonder what the plan is now?

well, again, thanks for the trip down memory lane, (e:vincent)!

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Category: potpourri

05/06/09 01:22 - 62ºF - ID#48603

reviews as entertainment

Again, reading product reviews at can offer hours of entertainment.

I'd offer examples, but there are just too many, and if you have ever looked for a review on something, than you know exactly what I mean.

and the comments that often follow someones "review" can be priceless; better than snark blogs at times.

Even though I kill a few brain cells knocking my head on the desk in wonderment at reading some these, I suddenly feel a bit smarter, too.
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Category: weather

05/04/09 09:54 - 56ºF - ID#48591

getting there..

Plastic came off the windows today. yay!

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Category: nerd

04/17/09 03:36 - 52ºF - ID#48421

needing to uncompress

after several months of primarily purchasing and file sharing of highly compressed MP3s, I needed to hit up a CD store.

the most recent CD purchases:

Bjork-Post (typical sound for her work, but I don't have any of her Cds, just MP3s, so this is a nice addition)

Bjork-Vespertine (melodic, breezy, pleasantly surprising- love it)

Ella Fitzgerald- Love Ella (the original versions)- good mix of stereo and mono. Awesome voice. Prefer her sound on vinyl, but this is pretty great to have on CD.

Ella Fitzgerald- Ella for Lovers (most intimate songs)- mono, but with limited noise reduction, so the sound is more pure.

soundtrack to Slumdog Millionaire (energetic, pretty, multi dimensional sound)

I'm very pleased with these purchases.

I'll be seeking to acquire a few more CDs of varying genres soon.

any audiophiles out there?

suggestions for my eager listening experience? :)
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Category: holiday

04/13/09 05:12 - 50ºF - ID#48378

Waterguns and Pussy Willows

woops, forgot to hit, "publish" a couple of hours ago.

Happy Dyngus day!


Dyngus Day Buffalo site:

from Holiday Insights,

Dyngus Day

When : Always the Monday after Easter

Dyngus Day, also spelled Dingus Day, is a Polish Holiday. It is very popular in Poland, and in Polish communities in America. After the long Lenten holiday, Dyngus Day is a day of fun. And, perhaps a little romantic fun. It is always celebrated on the Monday after Easter.

There area all sort of ways for boys to meet girls. But, this one takes the cake.

Guys, on this day you get to wet the ladies down. Sprinkling or drenching with water is your goal. Chase after the ladies with squirt guns, buckets, or other containers of water. The more bold and gallant boys, may choose to use cologne. Hitting (gently, please) the ladies on the legs with switches or pussy willows is also common.

Yes ladies, you can strike back. Ladies , you get your revenge on Tuesday, when tradition has it that you throw dishes or crockery back at the boys. It has become increasingly popular for the ladies to get their revenge on Monday, tossing water back at the boys.

Note: Dyngus Day is also called Wet Easter Monday. Hmmmmm, I wonder why!?

Origin of Dyngus Day:

When exploring the roots of Dyngus Day, Historians point to the baptism of Polish Prince Mieszko I in 966 A.D. Baptism with water signifies cleansing, fertility, and purification. Somewhere along the way, the tradition of tossing water on the girls and hitting them with pussy willows evolved.

Always a holiday in WNY! enjoy!

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Category: reflection

04/08/09 07:26 - 40ºF - ID#48328

On the Tip of My Tongue

ever have so many things on your mind, so many things going on, so many thoughts- whether any of them are interesting, humdrum or whatever, but you want to share, to write to keep connected, then the effort of doing so just leads to squat?

yeh, that's me right now.

even the mental effort to read posts and write comments can't get through the mental sludge.

Staying up all night and sleeping a few hours in the late morning is frying my brain. I swear I have dumbed-down these past few weeks. But all is worth it to help family to this degree temporarily. (e:theecarey,48091) & (e:theecarey,48112)

Not sure how much more I can stretch it out though- never been good on "overnights", and it really does make the rest of my life unbalanced, as any of you that have had that sort of schedule knows. Again, for better or worse, it won't be much longer. It has been a good experience and to look back on the situation later on, I will have been happy to have contributed my time and effort.

I can't imagine being in my 90's, healthy overall, but slowly losing pieces of my mind, for real. Dementia is fascinating- clear moments nestled between increasingly scattered and confusing ones. It must be frustrating to have less and less control, and everything that you have ever known to be on the edge of feeling/being lost forever. Sometimes the person experiences a whole new day, going through the motions, re learning expectations, having more experiences, then lose it all just to start it all over again the next morning.

Sometimes that would be nice right?

But then old thoughts creep in, making conflict with
current thought. Probably like having that sensation of wanting/having/trying to remember something on the tip of your tongue, but just out of reach- always.

And then to have people familiar and unfamiliar to come into and out of your life every day, on some level overseeing what you do, telling you what to do and/or helping you to do some of the most basic things. Sometimes you can do it on your own, sometimes you can't, and you know it, and it sucks. Having less control after a long life of taking care of yourself and your family must be incredibly.. frustrating, sad, etc.

And so, with other family members, I do what I can. I'm there to offer safety, look over the house, regular night checks, complete simple chores, listen to him talk, assist him when I can and should, oversee meds, take him to a day program in the morning, and whatever else is needed. I try not to interfere with his routines or self help skills, as I firmly believe that he doesn't need to have someone on top of him. I hang in the background as much as I can and step in when it seems that I should (such as when he puts on several pairs of underwear in varying configurations, tries to put one pair of shoes on over another as he failed to realize he already has a pair of shoes on, etc).

He has a great sense of humor and he often makes me laugh.

And so, one day at a time for me as well. I try to get things done in my own life- so many projects that require my attention, and they have more or less been suspended until I can re devote my time to them. This includes gym time. In time, I will get back to all of it. Just need some good night time, rejuvenating sleep. My brain just feels so fuzzy-things are often just on the tip of my tongue as well, these days. As I was explaining to (e:pyrcedgrrl), I want to go from point A to B, but some how forget about B, and end up at point E, M and Z or nowhere at all.

But its all good.

Sometimes when we are in the middle of something, it seems so big, daunting and permanent, but really, in hindsight, it was a very small piece of time in our lives, a tiny fragment of the bigger picture.
I often remind myself of that when I go through things. I also have the propensity to bail when things are rough, boring, awkward or any other non stimulating uncomfortable situation that you can think of. Not all, but in recent self reflection, there have been times that i have now known this to be true.
So with this, I am challenging myself to hang in there.

and I will.

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Category: silliness

04/01/09 04:45 - 46ºF - ID#48258

Have Some


made me laugh
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Category: quickies satisfy

03/25/09 08:25 - 51ºF - ID#48203

quick quick quick this and that

My windows and front door are open!

It smells so good outside! The milder temps and a little rain sprinkle makes the earthy yummy smells that I enjoy so much.

I can hear those awesome spring creature sounds!

After being sick a week, my icky germy apartment got a decent partial clean. I got the major rooms done, just need to finish up tomorrow.

I'd complete it tonight, but I go hang out with my elderly gentleman friend. Overall, even mild dementia is sad, but it sure has its funny moments too. He never fails to make me smile.

So said cleaning, feels really really good. Now that I am sitting and typing (and eating) real quick before I go, I am cooling off. Windows and door will be shut soon. Cats enjoying the air too. I almost wish I could stay home tonight to enjoy it, haha

btw, I am currently obsessed with Clorox Clean-up. I am very sensitive to cleaners, and can only use mild ones, as most irritate my lungs. I've been using various earth friendly varieties for years and Murphys Oil soap. Thats pretty much it. However, my BF uses the clorox stuff, and somehow things just seem more clean- look, smell and feel clean. So, I bought a bottle of Target brand for myself. Wish I could use it on everything, but it was good just to go over my kitchen and bathroom with.

Made a quick super yummy dinner. Simple cut up piece of boneless chicken breast sauted with some 'Asian' seasonings (a blend of dry spices- too many to list, but super good). Then tossed in a vegetable mix (cauliflower, carrot, snap peas, onion and red pepper). Mixed together, so delicious.

I ordered my netbook. After much deliberation, I went with the Acer. I can't hardly wait for it. I'll post more about it once it comes in. yay!

crap, gotta go.

have an awesome night!

edit: wow, I just realized this is my 600th post. Neato!

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Category: life

03/18/09 06:52 - 44ºF - ID#48112

cerebral spring clean

I am so ready to do some spring cleaning.

I just really can't wait to move everything around and wash it all down. Vacuum, dust, scrub and refresh. Clear out the cobwebs and bring a sense of revitalization to my simple living quarters. It feels good to do that. The fresh air outside has me itching to do all this. But I am still sick and not physically motivated after pulling a few all nighters with the older gentleman I take care of at night. (e:theecarey,48091)

soon though, sooooooonn!

in the meantime, just the basic cleaning will commence.

the occasional Super Deep cleaning is rather fun with the right music and energy levels.(and strong coffee!)

I think the day to day stuff is boring- such as dishes and litter box duty. It is always just there and it never feels like I accomplished anything. Nothing feels or looks different.

Vacuuming, dusting and floor washing is done sorta regularly, but still nothing special.

But getting all crazy and moving things around and really getting into every surface level, whether it needs it or not, is equivalent to clearing up some mental clutter. I personally feel good afterward; like I just had a cerebral spring clean. Clearing out the dark and dusty spaces of my mind and home after a long winter. Lame, yeh, maybe. But I bet some of you are on par with this? :D

Not sure when my clean-fest will be. I usually make a mess as I get into cupboards, drawers, closets, and other regularly neglected spaces and then organize and purge as part of the process. Then it all comes together so nicely. mmmmmm!

I'll probably find stuff that I don't want anymore, so I mind as well begin a pile to donate and maybe even have a garage sale again come May or June. I did well last year, with my first one ever.

so just maybe..

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Category: reflection

03/17/09 07:16 - ID#48091


ack been sick.

everyone I know has been sick, and normally I can bypass the effects of shared germs by getting extra sleep. When I don't sleep, I'm screwed.

I have been taking care of a friend of the family at night. He is 90 years old. His wife of the same age is in the hospital recuperating from a fall. She is mentally with it and sprite. He has some mild dementia that leaves him a little confused at times. Each day is almost a new day. Some things carry over, sometimes I am listening to the same loop of conversation. Anyway, between family and friends, someone is with him all the time. He goes to a day program then visits his beloved wife (who he is insanely in love with- if nothing else he remembers that everyday) in the evening. At night, someone stays over. He tends to not sleep all night and needs reminders to do a few hygiene things in the morning. Someone is there to pretty much ensure his safety in case he falls or something. Not to interfere too much or take away his independence. Just be there.

So I have been helping out 4 nights a week. I figure that it is temporary (until she gets back home) and it greatly helps everyone out. Although I can fall asleep if I want, I find it very hard to do so.
1. it isn't my own place
2. the tiny couch is uncomfy
3. He is asleep by nine or so then up for a few hours by midnight, then on and off regularly the remainder of the night. I'm definitely awake when he is.

Some nights I can doze off for an hour at a time for a combined and broken 2-3 hours max. Thats a good night. I go home in the morning and eventually grab three hours of straight solid sleep. That really messes with me!

I'm not complaining- just leading up to my being sick this weekend. As when everyone around me was getting sick, I ended up the same, especially after a few sleepless nights. Pretty much a cold- snots, stuffed nose, achy eyes, disconnected feeling.

Overall I'm not concerned about the lack of sleep situation, as it is temporary (otherwise couldn't continue for long term), and this gentleman is such a joy to be around.A true personal learning experience.

I've never been around "older" people. Actually, I am rarely if ever around anyone on either side of my life age continuum- ie; no one especially advanced in age or babies/toddlers. My grandparents died around the time of my birth, I have little family so no babies around, and my friends don't have/don't want kids- so no babies lurking around. I don't personally want any and the youngest kid I am around now a days is my boyfriends 3 yr old son, whom I see/hang out with on part of the weekend.

For the oldest I am around on occasion would be my aunt and uncle who are 70, so I guess that could count, but they are so young, hip, worldly and energetic that I have in my mind that that is the standard for that age. Maybe it is, if not, I hope to be just like them.

But 90- wow. It is surreal to think how much someone of that age has seen and gone through. For those that are healthy and mentally clear, I imagine it to be quite an experience to look back on their lives and realize what things were important and what things were stupid time wasters. What are the regrets, what are the moments of satisfaction that carried throughout the years?
and what it must be like to fade away, if you happen to suffer from mild dementia. Some times you are there, sometimes not, sometimes you hover in between. It must be difficult to watch someone you love hang there too. As dementia worsens, they aren't dying per se, but they are slipping away. That is scary.

So this has made me think of my own mortality lately..

where I want my life to go, what I want to put more effort into, what I want to put less effort into, what matters, what really doesn't, what sort of care and prospects do I want/need if I happen to get into late geriatric years. Also, what do I want to leave behind in terms of who I am... and does it matter?

So those are some of my thoughts as of late.

that and which netbook I plan to purchase this week. Asus? Acer? HP? Dell? I'd like to keep it cheap. My laptop is working at the moment and is why I can post, but I need something asap for the next round of when it doesn't work.

Well, right now, I have to get ready to head back out to his place. Being sick and sleeping part of the day, I have totally missed out on the nicer, warmer sunnier weather. Hope you have been enjoying it!
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New Site Wide Comments

paul said to ladycroft
Nice to "see" you. I let the CPR ads stay because at least it was something lol...

ladycroft said to joe finger went spastic. ...

ladycroft said to joe
Happy Birthday! I had my 30th with two of those peeps as well :) Remember the failed (but awesome)...

ladycroft said to joe
Happy Birthday! I had my 30th with two of those peeps as well :) Remember the failed (but awesome)...