Extreme Ways

extreme ways are back again
extreme places i didn't know
i broke everything new again
everything that i'd owned
i threw it out the windows, came along
extreme ways i know move apart
the colors of my sea
perfect color me

extreme ways that that help me
help me out late at night
extreme places i had gone
but never seen any light
dirty basements, dirty noise
dirty places coming through
extreme worlds alone
did you ever like it planned

i would stand in line for this
there's always room in life for this

oh baby, oh baby
then it fell apart, fell apart
oh baby, oh baby
then it fell apart, it fell apart
oh baby, oh baby
then it fell apart, it fell apart
oh baby, oh baby
like it always does, always does

extreme songs that told me
they helped me down every night
i didn't have much to say
i didn't get above the light
i closed my eyes and closed myself
and closed my world and never opened
up to anything
that could get me along

i had to close down everything
i had to close down my mind
too many things to cover me
too much can make me blind
i've seen so much in so many places
so many heartaches, so many faces
so many dirty things
you couldn't believe

i would stand in line for this
it's always good in life for this

oh baby, oh baby
then it fell apart, fell apart
oh baby, oh baby
then it fell apart, it fell apart
oh baby, oh baby
then it fell apart, it fell apart
oh baby, oh baby
like it always does, always does
~Moby


One day recently, with the sun shining, people and cars all around.. fresh air awakening the spirit, in this sleepy town... I walk to think. So much on the mind, a long, brisk, urgent walk in nature was needful. iPod and my thoughts, I set out to reflect. Moby, Extreme Ways comes on, and for some reason that i can't quite figure out, it seems fitting for the day.. It felt powerful against the backdrop of my thoughts and the visual information taken in along the way. I post the lyrics here as it is also my user sound.

I need to be asleep...

6:30 will come quickly.. but I will still manange to get my ass up and exercise.

What a weekend.. Fri: Irish Car bombs, The Commitments (thanks, again (e:Vincent) !!), and test driving the Hookah.. Sat: well, St. Matties Day :) and more Hookage! It was great to spend time with the peeps!! Sun: coffee and talking with (e:pyrcedgrrl), Spot, Co-Op, etc.. All good.

Talking is good. Communication on *every* level is vital.

It puts a bounce in your step.

What else? I am delerious... Off to think intensely, then less intensely as I drift off to sleep. Oy.. here is Monday morning....

Have great day everyone!!!!!

xo Carey

I knew it!

My kitties were stalking my fridge yesterday. They were staring at it intently. An occasional paw would be dipped underneath only to come up empty pawed.

For those with animals, you know that when they are staring at something you cannot see, it does not mean that something is not there.. usually there is.

But what?

My cat Joe is the most inquisitive. He is also tenacious. When he finds something of interest, he is very thorough with his new found amusement, whatver it may be.

In this case, it was a mouse.

Let me state for the record: My furballs are not mighty hunters. They are Mosquito Slayers, at best.

Or perhaps they are much more diabolical then their cute little whiskers let on.

I came home from class with the two of them poking their noses around the floor, following something I could not immediately see. I too, had to join in on the hunt. Ofcourse, I was slightly scared about what I would find. (yeh, I am so chicken at times)

So the three of us are crawling on the floor, dipping behind various pieces of furniture. I am checking behind curtains and moving chairs and cat toys along the way. Joe heads the hunt and helps lead me to the tiny four legged prey.

I jump up and grab the small bathroom garbage can.

Once I knew for sure that it was a mouse, I began demanding that the cats kill it. I could tell that they havebeen playing with and tormenting the little mouse for quite some time. It looked like it has been in a state of panic for hours. Days even...

"kill it" "come on, get it.. kill it already!"

So I see them bat furiously at the mouse I couldn't reach. I am not sure why I wanted it dead.. I kinda like little mice. However, tonight.. I sense the hunt.

But if I couldn't get to it.. I needed them to do it for me.

"Team work" made it possible to scoop the mouse into the garbage can, in which I then promptly headed out into the cold night, to release it into my neighbors yard.

The mouse will stay away if it knows what is good for it.

I hope there aren't any others..

Wow.. have I really posted over 100,000 words?

crazy.

I made it to work in approximately 30 minutes. I forgot how driving 75-80 will do that.

Reminds me of a time in my life when I used to do time trials down deserted roads throughout Wilson, Newfane and the outskirts of Lockport. I'd put the tac to the max.. how I didn't hurt myself or blow the engine or tranny, I am not sure.. but oh it was fun. Ever do a bleach burn out?
What can you do in the quarter mile?
I'd scare myself silly driving 90, 100, 110...
I did go through a lot of tires..
brakes..
and batteries..
I fondly remember off roading and mudding. Pacing. and racing. Positive traction, "catching posi"
Comparing engines..
Whats the firing order of your small block chevy? hmmm? 18436572
'course, one of mine was a big block.
Did I really pull motors? Rebuild.. for fun. Also spark plugs, oil changes, tire change (windex and crow bar.. )
I used to drool over rims.. Cragers, baby..

The games I would play on the road...

Ha.. I used to imagine owning a car themed sub shop.
Had a thing for 69 Chevelle SS-- hence- the car themed Sub Shop. Prices would go according to the size of engine 350, 427, 500.. etc. Big Block/Small Block. For the kiddies.. 4 bangers-

Not really the trip down memory lane I was intending.. there is a whole slew of shit that went with it. A life style long removed from reality. However, thinking back, it had its fun moments.

My hands are wiped from it all..

I don't even change my own oil anymore.
I don't think I would remember how.

..but stepping on that gas peddle this morning sure felt good.


Throwing in a few pictures here. I took them a couple of weeks ago-I figured I would change my user pic; which I did. You'll find a picture of my ever elusive and enormous fur blob, Emmy.

I moved my coffee table out from in front of the counch- moved it across the room, to provide me more room to do my yoga-stretches-etc. Also brought up my exercise bike. Emmy is fascinated. She joins me on the floor when I am on my back doing crunches. Too funny.. she could use a few repititions herself. >*.*<

Yep- straight hair. I like it. I do this once in awhile... I like the polished look.








Not sure what I am giggling at..


Emmy w/ her favorite mousey




Changes are being made. I am having my body composition evaluated on Friday. Oy.

I need to know what I am working with here.. although I should have done this a couple of months ago.. I still have a long way to go and this will be yet another useful tool. But I wont get into all that here.. but you will see..

ST. Pattys on Friday.. and St. Mattys on Saturday-- What a weekend to look forward to ! YAY!! :D

and I totally intend to grab a shamrock shake this week- as I havent yet done so!

a bientot, mon amies :)

Be good- Carey

The bright waxing moon on saturday night had a perfect rainbow-like swirl of color surrounding it. Anyone know if this effect has a name????

The moon framed in colors with a backdrop of stars.. amazing. It was so beautiful.. I gazed into the sky in awe.


I love the warmer weather. I hear the frog creatures making their noises outside. I love that sound. And in the morning, it has been the birds.. It is almost time to go outside and begin spring clean up.. and get ready for gardening and bon fires.

That warm intense rain today was kinda sexy.. ever kiss in the rain??

It is about time for bed..

Sweet dreams, everyone

Carey

To keep in the spirit of test results..

((e:robin) posted in her journal the test link:

The Playstation
Random Gentle Sex Master (RGSMf)


Easy to turn on. Hard to beat. You are The Playstation.

You're a nice girl, and you have lots of sex. It's therefore highly likely that you're attractive, and you're certainly outgoing & friendly. Plus, this healthy physical attitude of yours indicates deeper emotional well-being and stability. Unheard of. When guys dare to dream, they dream of you.

You don't get attached too easily, and, to wit, you're not necessarily looking for something long-term right now. That's a bigger asset than you know. Though, physically speaking, you're open to anything, you're keeping your emotional side well-protected. This means there won't be a lot of wreckage to clean up whenever you decide to settle down.


Your exact opposite:
The Priss

Deliberate Brutal Love Dreamer


In the meantime, the men you share yourself with actually respect you. Like them, you enjoy sex for its own sake and don't need any other validation for pleasure than pleasure itself. Hopefully, you have the good sense to blow off anyone who thinks less of you for that. Usually, this is the part of the description where we offer some life-correcting advice, but honestly, we can't think of anything about you we'd change. Keep on fucking, partner.


ALWAYS AVOID: The Mixed Messenger

CONSIDER: Anyone else

Do you want to know what reduces me to a goopy glop of mush? Go here:

(credit to (e:hodown) for sharing that link)

Other stuff: manners, kindness, patience and passion

Things that will not make me warm and fuzzy inside: disrespect, raw celery and spiders (and clowns and monkeys, especially monkeys dressed as clowns).

I am in bed with my beloved laptop, and down comes a spider, just two inches infront of my face. It is one of those super nasty yellowish-almost transparent varieties. Ya know.. big googly eyes, fangs, hair everywhere and maniacal laughter.. completes the picture.. mine, not the spiders' ;)

Anyhow, with my quick reaction. I sat up staight giving myself distance from the spider. Yet it dropped between my legs before I could bounce out of bed. *shiver*

Its dead.. its little body squished between Puffs Ultra Soft tissue.

I hope big momma spider doesn't come out to eat me in my sleep. (please, no nightmares.. ) Spiders in bed and in the shower leave me feeling very vulnerable. *looks around the room.. double checking the corners and ceiling above bed*

I must check out the uber cute site again.. to get the nasty multi legged creature out of my head..

Dated a guy once who was more scared of spiders than myself.

It is just about Friday.. I am so happy that this class is over. All the work is done.. I now have a ton of work due next week.. but I am giving myself about two days off before I look at any of it.

Off to dream land..

Respectfully,
Carey

The dishes are done, man.

• pow*

• climbs down from roof*

Ok.. they really aren't done..

and I have never taken a shot gun to my dirty dish collection, although it isn't a bad idea.. maybe work on some pent up hostility ;)

What is *really* done.. hehehe... and done quite well, so I think (hope)

is..

my...

MONSTER CLASS PROJECT!!!!

It isn't even all that long..

No longer than one of my classic (e:strip) posts (4 thousand words or so..) haha

But each sentence.. yeh.. it all works together.


I am not too proud to say that I need some pampering after this week..

I need to call about that massage... I sooooo need it now.. Sitting in one spot all day long
((minus the Corn beef, cabbage and Guiness lunch.. )
.., is killer on my back.

Do I normally whine this much?

Anyhow.. got my car back.. it was the gas line.

• bounce* I am happy that I have the project done.. now I just have a final tomorrow that I havent prepared for due to said monster project.

wish me luck..

and sweet dreams.. I need them.

• positive thoughts in-- nasty negative maladaptive whiny thoughts out-- positve thoughts in...*

Take care, lots of mushy love and sloppy kisses
Thee Carey

satisfied belly: check
candles lit: check
logs in the fireplace: indeed..check
small cup of coffee: check

maybe later.. wine. Although that, and the fireplace, is best when shared.

Alright.. so I am really tearing into this class project. [s]I must[/s]I will have it done by tomorrow evening.

I have so much on my mind that it is a challenge to maintain my focus-the good, the bad, the ugly- all of it, scratching at my mental door. Come back later or don't come around.

Had a few Hershey's Kisses although I did not really want them.

Everyone around me has boxes of Girl Scout cookies. Evil bitches.

I am also over tired today; sleep eluded me last night despite being drained and up hours and hours past my bedtime. Not so much a bad thing though..thanks friends ;)

I want to go camping. Soon. I intend to pack a bag and run for the hills. Exhaust myself hiking, playing ball and laughing. Then relaxing by a campfire with a light book, pen and paper...and intriguing conversation. Simple things...

My car is almost ready. It was the gas line. My front passenger door now opens. The rear driver's side opens, but quite possibly not for long. I was given the option to have the locking mechanism permanently disengaged. I always have stuff in my car and would prefer not to have one door that can never lock. If it can'tt ever open again, I won't be upset. I can still access the backseat through the other rear door. I was most concerned with the front. Not *all* of my friends like to get into my car Dukes of Hazard style :)

My niece let me borrow her car for work today, she is so sweet. ha, a kid she went to school with, TJ Van Dueson (sp) , also from Youngstown,is on an mtv show that starts tonight, 8th Ocean. I doubt I'll watch.. but he seems to be quite a cutie from the pictures I have seen..

My new neighbor rocks. He beat me to it and came to my door and introduced himself. We chatted for awhile and I firmly believe that we will get along well. We already discussed get-togethers and bon fire parties..and playing basketball. I also told him of the near miss the other day...where I was partially undressed and in the shared staircase when I heard him opening the door. I am such a dork sometimes. Anyway, it is refreshing to have someone live next door that is within my age bracket--whatever that is ;) More specifically, there are not a group of kids/babies next door to me. I can crank my techno and dance around without concern. He said I can't possibly ever be too loud. We'll see.. lol.

I am looking to have a massage this weekend. I am rewarding myself for all of my recent hard work and effort. I keep putting it off, but this past week (month) has really given me the incentive to just go and let someone take care of me. I don't feel as though I am full of knots or anything, but I want a deep tissue massage. I also don't want the person to talk to me while I am getting it done. I don't care for strangers to make small talk. Especially questions about school or work. Anyway, I was given a business card for a place in the North Town plaza. I have no preference where I go as long as they do a decent job. (e:Vincent) who do you go to again? Anyone have any other suggestions?

I need this week to slow down to a crawl.

Have no major plans for the weekend. I have neglected some people.. I should try to contact them..

Yet laundry and cleaning the apartment sounds wonderful as well. And sleep.

It is supposed to be a really nice weekend--excellent for hiking, running around outside.. throwing a nerf ball (my mutant pinky fingers can't handle the impact of a regular football)---fire up the grill.. Endless possibilities...


Break over.. back to school work.

Be good.. be kind..

Carey