Category: stars

01/28/08 02:10 - 33ºF - ID#43064

Mario Lopez is famous again

Because Mario Lopez can do this:

extra points for the leg kick while doing the snake

extra points for anyone who breaks out this dance at any function I attend on the next year.

He is qualified to be a host for this:

Permalink: Mario_Lopez_is_famous_again.html
Words: 54
Location: Jersey City, NJ

01/14/08 05:53 - 32ºF - ID#42881

To get a job at ATT you must be a moron

Copy of my recent im conversation with a ATT customer service agent:

Richard: Welcome to AT&T online Sales support. How may I assist you with placing your order today?
Jessica: hi, I have a question about purchasing a phone. Currently I am an ATT customer
Jessica: Ive found that the phones online are much less expensive than in stores
Richard: Great! I'd be happy to help you.
Jessica: however when I go to purchase a phone online im required to pick a plan with the purchase
Jessica: is there a way to only purchase the phone?
Richard: Yes, this is the case. Do you have a wireless phone with us now?
Jessica: I do
Richard: And you just need a replacement phone?
Jessica: thats correct
Richard: Unfortunately, customers are not able to do an upgrade online. You will want to visit one of our local stores to get a new phone for your service.
Jessica: thats what I was trying to avoid
Jessica: but thank you
Richard: Sure, sorry.

Things I find wrong with this conversation:
I stated I'm already a customer, when he asks if I am.
I state that I'm not looking to go to the ATT store.
He gives me the complete opposite answer of the person I just spoke with on the phone at ATT.
Oh an they've also informed me that I have exactly one day on which I can downgrade my plan (if you know me you know I avoid the phone ike the plague). Also the woman on the phone told me to just buy the phone and then pick a new plan, but somehow it won't be billed if I don't activitate it. That sound so shady. This is exactly why I buy a craptastic phone and use it until I get messages like"no sim card found" "invalid battery" or my phone just shuts off randomly.

In conclusion I hate ATT and I hate phones.

Permalink: To_get_a_job_at_ATT_you_must_be_a_moron.html
Words: 326
Location: Jersey City, NJ

Category: youtube

01/11/08 03:54 - 39ºF - ID#42841

If you don't find this funny

please let me know ASAP so I can discontinue our friendship.

Thanks,
Jessica

Permalink: If_you_don_t_find_this_funny.html
Words: 26
Location: Jersey City, NJ

Category: presents

01/02/08 10:58 - 15ºF - ID#42722

Im a jerk

I got back to work today to find a few gifts from co-workers at my desk. Now I know you're not suppossed to look a gift horse in the mouth or something but..

I got this as a gift:

It's so not me. I've never been one to carry engraved keychains with pictures of loved ones. There's space for 6 pictures. I have 2 problems with that feature:

1. There aren't 6 people in the world I like enough to carry around pictures of.

2. How do you get pictuers that tiny to fit into it?

So yeah I'm a jerk, but I hate this key chain.

Permalink: Im_a_jerk.html
Words: 104
Location: Jersey City, NJ

Category: ipods

12/12/07 03:13 - 34ºF - ID#42491

RIP H to the Izzo Part II

A few weeks ago H to the Izzo was lost to a tragic subway incident. He is survived by H to the Izzo Part I (who is currently in critical condition).

I was going insane (literally) with out any music in my life. I mean NPR is great, but nothing can replace a little JT bringing the sexy back. Thankfully Sarah Ho shares (unlike me) and gifted to me H to the Izzo Part III. I just loaded him up with some tunes and I can not wait for my commute home (I can begin ignoring all humans again).

Viva la H to the Izzo!

Permalink: RIP_H_to_the_Izzo_Part_II.html
Words: 105
Location: Jersey City, NJ

Category: junk

12/10/07 05:00 - 33ºF - ID#42458

Do not read if..

You can not resist cute Japanese useless junk.

I made the mistake of clicking from this article:

to this website:

and it was all over. All the sudden I found myself wondering how I've lived to be 30 years old with out ever owning:

He is Nittle Chin and he speaks to you. I have no idea how big or little Nittle is or what he says. All I know is that he only costs $13.73 plus shipping and handling.

Also I've discovered:

The discription for this was:

"You make your ariginal animals (boys?) by getting together the other parts! All 7 types and 1 secret, you can enjoy new figure world!"

Seriously there's a secret. I must own all 7 and unlock the ariginal secret!! And each one is only $4.71. It's almost free.

Permalink: Do_not_read_if_.html
Words: 146
Location: Jersey City, NJ

Category: weddings

12/03/07 12:25 - 32ºF - ID#42379

Best Wedding Ever

This past weekend I went to the best wedding I've ever attended. It was such a stark contrast to the last wedding I went to where the groom came to the table drunk and went on and on about how he wasn't allowed to invite his friends and he really didn't want to be married.

This wedding you could clearly see how in love the couple was. Everyone had such touching stories about the bride and groom. They said their vows just as the sun was setting behind them over the NYC skyline. It couldn't have been more perfect. I don't think I've ever been so teary eyed!

See pictures below for the pictorial story of the Benelle wedding (Ben & Danelle):

save the Date. can it be any more adorable?

Seating assignments. Subway style.

Cate's famous cupcakes. Subway style.

View of the skyline as seen from DUMBO

Name cards. J-Ho. I loved them.

First Dance.

End of the night. Well almost the end of the night..

Permalink: Best_Wedding_Ever.html
Words: 181
Location: Jersey City, NJ

Category: work

11/28/07 03:51 - 34ºF - ID#42320

Holiday Party

Every year my company throws an over the top Holiday Party. Last year my sister said she felt like she was at the Emmys. I'm not really into it because they require us to dress up. If they threw like a jeans and beer party I'd be all for it. And the wives are there which makes it not as fun. You can't get wasted and have inappropriate makeouts and/or flirtations. Either way I plan on sending out a memo to my office faves that says:

Permalink: Holiday_Party.html
Words: 89
Location: Jersey City, NJ

Category: buffalo

11/15/07 03:26 - 40ºF - ID#42145

Buffalo

According to New York Magazine if you're looking for the next new place to live it's:

That's right. They say forget Brooklyn, as a matter of fact forget New York City all together. Move to Buffalo now before the gentrification takes over and makes it took expensive. I'm going to hold off and wait for global warming to kick in. The snow scares me.

Permalink: Buffalo.html
Words: 66
Location: Jersey City, NJ

11/14/07 05:28 - 54ºF - ID#42118

Douche with Lysol

Really Lysol can clean your vag and save your marriage? If that's the case I vote for dirty vag and being single.

paul writes at 07:02:45 11/28/07 - Comment #28575: I still can't believe this is real.

ladycroft writes at 03:48:54 11/15/07 - Comment #28020: oh my.

jbeatty writes at 07:08:12 11/14/07 - Comment #27958: If I encountered a woman that smelled of Lysol in her nether region I would run!

jenks writes at 06:24:07 11/14/07 - Comment #27949: P.S. Someone please send away for the brochure on feminine hygiene facts.

jenks writes at 06:23:06 11/14/07 - Comment #27948: Do you think they could say "daintiness" any more???

gross.

imk2 writes at 05:57:52 11/14/07 - Comment #27945: ok, if her vag is in need of lysol, maybe it's because a dirty dong was in it? maybe the husband should dip his dick in some battery acid and see if we can prevent this problem in the future?

james writes at 05:49:39 11/14/07 - Comment #27944: OMG LIBERTAD! I just spit coffee out of my nose with that comment!

seriously, I have nothing to say now. I forgot what my comment was.

mike writes at 05:48:19 11/14/07 - Comment #27943: so that's why you always smell so lemony fresh...

metalpeter writes at 05:47:05 11/14/07 - Comment #27942: I wonder if that really worked. Before I saw the picture I thought of the canned spray and thought but what happens when the guy goes down on her. But looking at the bottom it is a concentrate meaning that it is very strong and gets to the right strength with mixing with water. It still seems a little strange. I still wonder if that was true? I also wonder if that was made to use that way or if it was just someone's crazy idea.

libertad writes at 05:43:44 11/14/07 - Comment #27940: OMG that is scary. I can't even imagine how awful it would be if I had a vagina and used Lysol as a douche! It gives new meaning to the saying "It is so clean you can eat off of it".

Permalink: Douche_with_Lysol.html
Words: 24
Location: Jersey City, NJ

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