I had a dream last night. It was very frightening. I have dreams all the time where I'm being chased by people, and more often than not I have the super-hero like duties of rescuing someone amidst the chase. It's adventurous, sometimes scary, but usually very cool in the fashion of a La femme Nikita episode. Last night was different. I was afraid. In my dream I was kidnapped while walking on Elmwood. A black van came to a screeching halt just as I was passing Spot. About a dozen heavily armed special ops dudes jumped from the van and beamed me in the head. I was knocked out cold. I woke up on a hospital gurney. I was being rolled down a cold hallway, the pattern of fluorescent lights blinking overhead, I realized I couldn't move. I was strapped down with full suicide gear. Now in my time of need, no one is there to assist. Why am I always playing the role of the super-hero and now that I could really use some help, there's no one. No one but a team of freaky looking doctors with perverted grins as I'm wheeled into the operating room. "This is going to hurt", says the man in a white coat with a grey comb over. "Nurse, tag the right arm". "Yes, doctor". She snaps on a bracelet, it reads, 'remove right kidney'. A wave of nausea overcomes me. I start screaming and yelling, "You can't take my kidney, and it's the only one I have left!" The doctor cackles and raises a scalpel. I awoke in a puddle of sweat. Ciao.

I just picked about 6 dozen Romas from my garden. Seriously, who wants tomatoes!? Tell me, I'll make a personal delivery to your doorstep! (e:Leetee), you're a veggie, I'm sure you'd make use of them eh? It's either passing them out to folks or I'll have to host a tomatillo party. Who wants to get messy!?

No details yet, but save the date of September 10th. I'm having my 30th birthday party and (e:Lilho) is having her housewarming. A collaboration of the events is probable, but still under construction. Stay tuned for updates. It's sure to be a positively smashing evening!

I saw Hamlet last night with (e:Jason). Another outstanding performance by Paul Todaro! He kicked ass as Mercutio in Romeo and Juliet [inlink]ladycroft,21[/inlink]. Now he's kicking more ass as Hamlet. The voice effects for the Ghost was sweet. You've only got 3 shows left, so make sure you check it out! Ciao.

Ok. Watching Ghost Hunters at 1am all by yourself in a large building is not cool. Well, yes it is cool, I like to scare the crap out of myself. I swear I saw a kid run by the lounge door 5 or 6 times. Man I love the human brain, it's absolutely amazing! I wish I had a video camera, I could make some crap Blair Witch junk around here. Hey, (e:Mike) - get your tail down here! You could have one of your soap opera folks get trapped by demons in a deserted building, haha. Ok, back to work it is. Ciao.

So I'm all moved in to my new 'apartment'. It is way creepy. I am entirely alone in this big dorm building. In fact, the only other person on the entire campus is a night time rent-a-cop! Plus it's about 10,000 degrees up there which makes hallucinations all the more likely. If anyone wants to come out and visit me in the next week, I've got the place all to myself. I've got a big screen tv (well, not ME..but the lounge), pool table, fooseball... I must admit I did have a little fun running up and down the halls doing cartwheels and singing really bad showtunes. Just for kicks. Ciao.

The wedding is done. Hurray! Here’s a blurry pic of the happy couple.

Here is a pic of what we did to their truck. Every last inch of the interior was wrapped in aluminium foil. Nice.


Today I spent the day moving and I’m whipped. I didn’t really have much but when you’re working on a week of 15 collective hours of sleep, it’s draining. My junk is all over the show. I’m coasting on fumes baby! I made this list.
You know you’re spent when:
1.You can’t remember why you just opened the fridge door.
2.You ask your little sister 15 times where she put your bag.
3.You try to call your own cell phone and wonder why the hell no one is picking up.
4.You try to put a cd in the player upside down.
5.You fall asleep while playing Mario Kart and run straight into a wall.
6.You feed your dog twice in 1 hour.
7.You run all your errands in your pajamas.
8.You shampoo your hair with conditioner and condition it with shampoo.
9.You try to shave with the plastic cover on the razor.
10.You answer the question: “What did you think of the wedding” with, “She likes Poland Spring water because it has texture.” WTF???

Catch you kids latas. Have a good one. Ciao.

'To know someone here or there with whom you can feel there is understanding in spite of distances or thoughts expressed – that can make life a garden.' –Goethe

That’s what I’m talking about. It’s not about being PC, it’s not about tolerating differences, it’s about respect and understanding. My life is a garden; you’re all welcome in it. Ciao.

Some woman actually screamed this at my pregnant sister. I think she was crazy.

I made it to Canada’s Wonderland and checked out the Italian Job stunt track. It’s sweet. It’s a short ride and tops out at 30mph, but it’s full of tight banks, quick drops and a lovely dark twisty tunnel. The flame thrower and water bomb are a nice distraction, but my favorite detail is that the tiny little doors on the Minis actually open up!



I got this killer belt at one of the shops. I normally don’t buy tack from the shops but…. someone once told me they thought they needed to wear a seatbelt reading some of my stories. When I saw this belt I thought it was a great statement for Lady Croft.

I’ve got more entertaining stories, and photos, to share of Canada’s Wonderland, but I’m exhausted and I’ve had more added to my list of wedding ‘to do’s’. Ciao.

Sleeping on the sofa again. I'm not sure how I'll react when I move on Monday. I went from 2 dogs, to 1 dog, to me and 1 dog on a sofa. Now I'm expected to sleep in a huge queen bed all by myself? I think I'm going to be lonely. Maybe I should buy a gazillion pillows to surround myself. Ciao.

It was such a pleasure to meet so many (e:peeps) at the party! Let’s see…(e:Boxerboi), we totally need to do that GPS treasure hunt. Tell Jeff he is the supreme back cracker and I look forward to many more back bends! (e:Terry), I didn’t see much of you but enjoyed the quick chat about cooking and videogames. (e:Mike), who knew you could come up with 30 different ways to say my name wrong? I was thoroughly impressed; I still think you need to win some kind of prize for that. I look forward to being in your soap opera. (e:Hodown), remember next time you see Moby ask him to sign a teabag for Lady Croft. Loved your hair by the way. (e:Josh), sorry for kicking your ass at Mario Kart, I thought being drunk might lessen my skillz. (e:Flacidness), loved our 4am dance session in the kitchen; we totally need to hit the dance floor soon. (e:Lilho), thanks for giving me the lowdown on so many new faces. (e:Drchlorine), good to see you. (e:Matthew), I’m glad you liked my hummus, didn’t mean to snatch the last cucumber from you. You know you have a great smile? (e:Iriesarah), you’re too much fun. Did you know you snore like a freight train blowing through a nitroglycerine plant? Ha! (e:Dimartiste), I’m glad you liked the zucchini squares enough to give me a bear hug. Thanks for the great conversation on gravity and the little adventure hunting for people passed out on neighboring lawns. (e:Springfarie), also thanks for the great conversation and little adventure hunting for people passed out on neighboring lawns. (e:Jason), ‘two pumps’ in a handshake, I won’t forget. How can one person get spilled on so many times? Well, now that I think about it, my pants took about 5 big hits, but I think you still win. (e:Paulnotpaul), OMG I have to hear the story about bad underwear again. I almost wet myself! Thank you (e:Paul) for dedication to the site, I hope you enjoy the Goldschlager. I’m sorry for hijacking your bed and spooning you in my sleep. I know I met more folks, please forgive me for not remembering. I came alone not knowing a single person, so I think I’ve done well remembering who I met, some while drunk. It was a most enjoyable evening, everyone was terrific! Well, everyone except the dude that dropped his girlfriend on the floor. Ciao.

I think Paul requested me to post a photo of my garden. It's not glam, but it grows great veggies!