Humor Me,

Here's some mild controversy for you (e:peeps).

I'm at work. Cause I forgot about MLK day. Which is kinda sad, but maybe not. JayZee's here too...I mean Jon Zhang, but I don't assume he's much for any American holiday.

I'm a bit driven lately. I just want to get good work done. Plus I have no phone, which honestly is like my other brain. It keeps track of everything for me. I love it. I love it so much. (OK I'm not going to start that again).

I guess I can't blame this on the phone, or my on-again-off-again over consuming drive either. So, I should be excited that it's MLK day, right? Right?

I think that the spirit of MLK day and a part of what MLK stood for is challenging the status quo for the betterment of his people (and I by that I mean Americans. Who doesn't want to live in peace?).

I think it's a challenge to be a driven and contributing member of society being from the demographic I am from. (Check the photo. I'm a black dude). I've grown up around people who I know could and should have been much better off than they ended up. I won't start listing the reasons why, the obvious not withstanding. This is not to say that they're lives are lesser because of where they ended up, but it's sad all the same to see anything not reach it's full potential, needless to say half of it's potential for too many reasons. When someone dosn't become as amazing as they should have been we all loose. What if they were the ones that were going to invent the internet, or a wheel, or hot pockets?

Ok one example. My grammie, Jimmie Hardison (yeah her name is Jimmie), was a math and memory monster. She could total a grocery bill including tax an coupons as she shopped, often corrected the check out personnel, and told her where she made her mistakes. She was also artistically astute, but because of how she grew up she ended up being a housewife/baby-factory for a dude who was born with a speech impediment, a mean spirit, and who had general sense of nastiness about him. It was all she could do with her life. Nine kids sealed the deal (yeah 8 aunts and uncles and that's just on the moms side). I noticed all of her wonderful traits as her grandson and inherited some of them (thank the maker) to my chagrin, since I knew she was always held back from becoming the beacon of human excellence she was able to become. Weather it was because of my mean grampa, or because of what she was a Black, Irish, & Native American woman in 1920's - 40's USA leaves enough to be said. Still, it's sad one way or another.

I think I'm doing better than I ever thought I could, and I'm really glad for it. Not just because of the direct benefit of being compensated for my work, but for the example I set for my immediate family members, the next generation of humans, and anyone else who may happen to meet me who had a preconstructed idea of who I might be. Even if I'm not a millionaire or even a thousandaire, I'm really happy, and my work makes their world a better place, so at least I feel like I'm giving back to humanity in many ways (I hope... I think), and I don't think I could have been able to accomplish any of these things as easily and maybe at all without Dr. Kings life coming before mine. Hopefully someone in the future will be able to say that about something that occurred in my life.

So me ending up at work on MLK day cause I want to get some good work out or even that I forgot I was off because of the same reasons I guess ain't so bad, to me at least. I'm sure he's smiling down on me from where ever he is...

You peeps have a sweet Milk day, enjoy some human excellence and make some of your own as well, cause that's what today's about really.

Hey!

This one's really nerdy, but a least it's not whiny!

Me and (e:paul) were talking about the internet (picture that!) and he made a point that got me thinking. I didn't own [myfullname].com, and that was stupid for too many reasons.

A. I'm a web worker.
B. I'm a nerd
C. People will find you online no matter how badly you want them not to. What they find may be up to you depending on how much you've done about it before they get there.

Ok C sounded a little paranoid, but with good reason. Our latest scandal not withstanding. One time I had a crush on a girl and I posted it here and then she emailed me a link to my own effin' journal confronting me about it.... yeah.

On the flip side of "C" I've been having these philosophical epiphanies of late, normally to do with chemicals that aren't native to my brain, but epiphanies none the less. The way I've come to these ideas tend to make me question their validity until I discuss them with people in the real world who are not under the influence of such chemicals. Much to my delight they hold a considerable amount of water. Tell me what you think...

I've come to a conclusion that the internet is the single greatest invention that human beings have created since the beginning of time. Which is not to say that there are not other great ones that we've invented in the past, or that there won't be greater ones one the future, but right now the information super highway is the bees knees.

Allow me to expand upon that idea (so I don't just sound like a webby fanboy).

If you view intelligence as a biological tool, like gills, teeth, or arms it's got some unique qualities that as a result set human beings apart from every other creature on the planet, epically since we have such a well developed intelligence (en mass not per individual, as well all know that some of us are a bit defunct in that category).

The best thing about intelligence is the fact that with it we can create artificial organisms that modify our base abilities and attributes and allow us to become more than we are at birth. The telephone and the network that supports telephonic communication for instance is an artificial organism (else wise known as a device), that allows us to communicate in ways we never could. So to does the airplane, automobile, microwave oven, nintendo wii (ok maybe not the later as much...), etc. But more than our ability to create and expand our capabilities in our world we have the ability to benefit from the intelligence of past and current members of our species (or population) from outside of our physiology because of these devices.

If the very first frogs as we know them's legs allowed them swim and hop where before they could only swim, the only way they were able to pass his new found abilities on to his offspring is by reproducing and hoping that the offspring will inherit those traits. Sometimes the traits aren't even passed, sometimes they are to no effect, and sometimes to detrimental effect. Not passing traits at times is for the best since I've seen images of frogs who's eyes grew inside their mouths instead of on top of their heads (here's an article). Ok maybe that'd be better than the current configuration, but my point is that there's very little way for future frogs to benefit from any new development that a frog can come up with in it's lifetime.

Intelligence on the other hand can be recorded and improved upon, such that none of the time and energy of creating anything that has been created by intelligence need ever be spent again. This applies not only by our offspring, but by other members of the current generation. So now our lives will benefit the lives of others, even if we don't reproduce.

This phenomenon It has it's down falls too. Should a development occur in a life form that would endanger it, hopefully it would die before it got a chance to reproduce and spread that trait. We have other technologies that help us simulate this "natural selection" like markets and such but it doesn't always work, but I digress.

The ability to pass our created abilities makes us super organisms, or um.... humans. We've been doing this for centuries and as a result we advance at an exponential rate compared to the other organisms we share the planet with.

Now fast forward to the current time and this here internet thing.

All it really is is a collection of creations, albeit abstract creations, but even the most abstract creation on the internet has some concrete equivalents (ie. you and I having this here (e:community) my (e:peeps)), and/or aid in the creation of other more complex creations at an accelerated rate. It catalogs and stores our creations in an organized manner that allows for efficient recall of creations beyond the creators ability to organize and store. If anything is on the web for just a day sometimes, it may never go away for better or for worse.

I have more of this dribble to expound but I should probably break this one off here. If this were a turd it'd be snaking out of the bowl by now, but I promise to return to this topic (weather or not you're interested since you're clearly not the only one who can or will read this... he he he).

Wrapping this post up. I figured I should by my names URL and point it someplace that would at least better describe me, and aid the process of accelerating humans.


PS. On a warm and fuzzy tip. This here internet may be around well after your great grandkids are long gone... and what you do here will be all that is left of many of us. Leave as much as you can behind for them to see since they will find you too.

--this is forever.

Okies...

Here are the facts. I need some opinion on this my peeps.

I have a social addiction, and have done well to curb it since I haven't had a phone. Ok, not so much curbing as much as hanging out with only 1 person, but that's not so bad when she's as cute as she's been. I'm gonna lay down some facts, and I want you to let me know what I should do...

1. I have been paying for phone service this month sans phone (bout 65$).

2. I have to pay the replacement fee for my phone and have finally ($50) so it's on it's way.

3. I can pay an additional fee to have it overnighted typically it's $15 bucks, but since tomorrow is the weekend it more ($30).

4. I can however pay to have my phone overnighted on Sunday and it would get here on Monday and that would cost ($15).

5. I feel like I'm going to explode if I don't have my phone back in a few hours let alone days, and well if I don't get it overnighted at all it'll get here on Thursday for "free" ($0).

6. I can't stand not having a data card in my phone, and this will be the 3rd one I bought for it and they were each about $50 after shipping so this one will make the grand total for data cards kinda high ($150).

so really is another $30 bucks all that bad to be able to chat with folks again? I da know.. you tell me.

I think I want some Chinese food. I'm going to go to Great Wall (the last place my phone was in my presence and where we were the last customers at midnight that fateful night. Where they say they didn't see any phone before I even mentioned my phone.... phone stealers! Yes, I will go there and order something yummy... then punch that dude in the fuckin' face.

Ok,

Aside from any issue with having anything to do with heart breakers who sleep with ex-bestfriends I have upped my level of ratttiude!

First, however, I am not going to be banding with said heart breaker, the party of the 2nd part decided that it would be bad form to join forces with me for good reason that need not be stated here (there will be no underwear airing on my laundry line). I'm sorry for any ill will that might have been caused by it, but that's all behind us now...

Ok... now recently as a part of my humanist philosophy to better humanity I agreed to donate some blood to an experiment here at work (Roswell Park Cancer Institute), but I didn't want to just sign up blindly, or be constantly harassed to be included in future experiments so I did some probing and the research sound quite fascinating.

I could go on but why not just rep the doctor who's conducting the experiment and put some text from one of my messages to the research scientists up here for you to read:

... For this particular study, an investigator is developing the methodology to look for very common damage to DNA of a particular sort that can than be used in studying some specific hypotheses regarding cancer risk.

We really appreciate your helping out...

I'll go deeper into my ideas about humanism and such latter, but check this dude out, and check out what research you can aid that might cure a disease in your great grand kids by just giving up some blood, and some time to someone like Dr. Box (::snicker::..., yeah his name is Dr. Box!).

Ok,

Aside from any issue with having anything to do with heartbreakers who sleep with ex-bestfriends I have upped my level of ratttiude!

First, however, I am not going to be banding with said heartbreaker, the party of the 2nd part decided that it would be bad form to join forces with me for good reason that need not be stated here (there will be no underware airing on my laundry line). I'm sorry for any ill will that might have been caused by it, but that's all beind us now...

Ok... now recently as a part of my humanist philosphy to better humanity I agreed to donate some blood to an experiment here at work (Roswell Park Cancer Institute), but I didn't want to just sign up bliindly, or be constantly harrased to be included in future expermients so I did some probing and the resesarch sound quite facinating.

I could go on but why not just rep the doctor who's conducting the experment and put some text from one of my messages to the research scienctists up here for you to read:

... For this particular study, an investigator is developing the methodology to look for very common damage to DNA of a particular sort that can than be used in studying some specific hypotheses regarding cancer risk.

We really appreciate your helping out...

I'll go deeper into my ideas about humanism and such latter, but check this dude out, and check out what research you can aid that might cure a disease in your great grand kids by just giving up some blood, and some time to someone like Dr. Box (::snicker..., yeah his name is Dr. Box!).

do...do-do, do do, doot, da do!
do, do do, doot, da do!
do, do do, doot, da dah, doot, da dah doot

[continue to imagine Zelda musics playing in the background]

Ok... today marks the beginning of the end of my phonelessness.

I just finished the last dungeon and now I'm heading back to IT village past the town of Allen at 901 Washington where the other 2 pieces of the TriForce of communication lay wating.

1. The TriForce of Law - And affidavit that states that I in fact did loose it and am not scamming them for a free one.

2. The TriForce of Identification - A xerox of my NYS drivers licence that proves that I am me

And lastly the sacred ...

3. TriForce of Sprint - A copy of my last bill!


With these and the force of 50 American dollars I can unlock the secrets of the universe and no longer be an caveman with a can and a string. We'll see how long it takes to come back after I send this here letter out...

Until then life remains as drab as it wanna be, unless I'm hanging out with Megan, who happens to be the bee's knees....

I'm going to SPoT to eat a sandwich and read a Chuck Palahniuk book that mysteriously appeared on my stairs days after New Years with a Joanna Newsome album in a brown paper package. Found it when (e:terry), (e:brit) and I came back to my flat to pick up a board game we tried and failed to play before karaoke this friday. I digress, should any of you (e:peeps) see this post and wanna hang, come on down to the down of town and we'll have some fancy coffee drinks...

Ok,

I hate new years resolutions, mostly cause they're never taken seriously, and when they are it's usually not something that should have waited a year, but... I'm feeling giddy right now so here goes.

1. I hope to start a small government in my pants by this time next year!
2. I will most certainly get a phone before the year is over.... but only gawd knows when since more disaster has stricken since last I posted...
(hence the desire to die)
3. I will live to see my self not die!
4. I will not go to the gym until all the resolution people are gone...
5. I will make more home meals since my cooking is better than just about every girls who've I've ever date (ok, Becky's quesadillias were kinda svelte but she was just a mean person so she don't count)
6. I promise to shave vycious at least once more, possibly this time with a small half-Asian girl assisting me. (cause it's funny!)
7. I promise to make my computer work, or blow it up with dyn-o-mite (yes the Jimmie Walker kind).
7. I promise to give (e:vycious) his number seven back... which he really shouldn't be that upset about not having since it's kinda lame.
8. I promise not to make resolutions that are stupid or not entertaining to at least one other person, since really they're just comic relief for the richer, thinner, more productive selves we all keep locked tidily away in the sticky oubliettes of our minds...
9. I may have a cheese sandwich in the next 10 minutes
10. I will program a bunch of stuff...


There's my tenleven revolutions.

Ok here's the sad news... Phone still gone, now debit card gone and the wait for new phone broadens, I think I've contracted some kind of stomach flu, my compys still broken, I still can't dunk a basketball, double dutch still confuses me, and I'm waiting for my liver to end up missing, but on a lighter note

I HAD THE MOST FUN I'VE EVER HAD ON NEW YEARS AT (E:PMT) 's

Thanks sooo much for having that shindig guys... You dudes rock. Pray for me (I mean it).

Yeah,

So last night I was wasted, more than I think I've ever been off of beers and wings alone, but waisted none the less.

Ok I'm sure it has something to do with knowing the bartender at the bar you're drinking at... So, I got to watch the Sabers destroy the Canes' which I love to see since they ousted us from the cup run last year...

Got hungry, when to great wall where I remember receiving a text message and the next time I check... no phoney.

Sad tony.

I have insurance so I'll have a new phone in days, and my contacts are backed up at work so I can call you (yes you), but it's sad that I have no phone on new years...

very sad..

I can't wait for this party though. I have some extra surprises that I will unveil for (e:pmt) during the secret santa event.


allright you estrippers... keep on strippin!

Ooooh.

When I start these I always say that it's going to be short and sweet and it's always a lie.

I had soo much fun at my party. Thank you sooo much (e:pmt) for hosting it. Thank you all sooo much for coming. I think that it was the happiest day of my life.

I was soo jazzed that I woke up at 9:00am the next day calling people cause I wanted to hang out and hear that hey had a good time.

Ok, so for me there were quite a few highlights but I'll limit my self to 3. If you were there and anything fun (or scandalous, for all you rumor mongers) happened please do tell. I need to relive these moments while they're fresh in my mind.

3. Pinata - After the bands were done and we were cutting a rug in (e:pmt)'s living room I busted out my 30ish pinata and we all pummeled it until mounds of candy and condoms showered the dance floor... minutes later on a break in the kitchen (e:paul) came in with two handfulls and one mouth full of candy and could barely mutter "there's candy everywhere in there, it's soo great!". Funniest moment of the night

2. Allison - A very cute and nerdy girl who keeps books, page makers, and highlighters for passages that she wants to remember in her purse danced with me for quite a while. I've known her for some time, but not as well as I would like to... hopfully meeting her at La Luna tonight will be worth postponing my regularly scheduled every other Wednesday.

1. Passion - A band I have admired for almost a year played and I got be a part of and sing my favorite song "Lady Fingers" on stage with, that included some of the most well respected and talented musicians in the city (Fen, Thom, Andy, ect...) and entertained the crowd at the party with all their tune (they only have one), and a stunning rendition of "We are the world". Sigh... oh man oh man, it coudlnt' get any better.


0. (e:thecarey) secretly sneaking about and cleaning up the whole affair before I could get back in the morning. (I had a cleaning crew ready to go, but us only having to replace the furniture made everything that much easier, thanks sooo much).

Ok I cheated. But Carrie deserves some accolades.

Thanks again everyone and (e:pmt). You guys are the best. And thank you all once more for making my party a success!

Ok...

I was supposed to go to a movie today with (e:vycious) whom ever he was going to invite, whom ever I was going to invite, (e:imk2), and (e:des) today . We had some passes for Van Wilder, but um.. I uh. lost the tickets somewhere in the course of cleaning out my car. (A looser is me)

So tonight was almost like any other night that (e:vycious) would let me use his basement laundry facilities and we'd hang out and play video games while we got wasted, and then Erin came over and all hell broke loose!

(e:vycious) needed a back shaving and at first I was thought why would I shave my freinds back? Then I said to my self, why not?! Isn't that what friends, and little camcorders in your phone are for? Besides (e:vycious) is very hobbity in many ways (he's got very course wirey hairs that spring from the most uncomely of places, so he feels) and shaves on the occasion to mask his true nature from the rest of human kind...

So with Erin behind the camera we commenced to make this here video. I've transcribed just below it.

Afterwards I found out that the blades were dull and there was a loose tooth on it which made it bite quite a bit so none of the ow's are fake (sorry (e:vycious) ), and after some sincere apologizes and (e:vycious) 's review of the video he approved it's being posted since it's pretty damn funny. He's quite a sport that (e:vycious).

Enjoy...

OOOH.... Don't forget about the 2 estrip parties that are coming up. enknot Birthday and (e:pmt)'s Xmas Bash! Details about the birthday part are in my previous post and i'll keep you all posted here.

::Download Flash Video::

enknot: I am now. e n k n o t, going to shave vycious' back, come and see his hairy assed back


enknot: clippers... how do I get this on? Is there a switch? I can't figure it out. Oh, here goes. Oh yes,

vycious: ow!

enknot: shut up

vycious: ow! ow ow ow!

enknot: you fuzzy son of a bitch

enknot: you hobbit bastard

vycious: ow!

enknot: why dosn't it shave?

vycious: because it's battery operated

enknot: you've got evil hobbit hair

vycious: a.. hooowwooww. I'm going to go to work tomorrow and I'm going to be bloody. ow ow!

erin: come on, be nice... [giggles]

enknot: I am being nice!

vycious: that really hurts..

enknot: Say my name bitch!

vycious: ow

enknot: Say my name

vycious: it's really hurting...

enknot: I've gotta get. I've gotta get this hair offa here dude. Otherwise it'll be on there, and you don't want that

erin: you gotta be nice though [giggles]

vycious: ow, ow.

enknot: yeah baby! Yeah! [ smacks ].

vycious: ow. ahh I'm bleeding.

enknot: He's all red..

erin: you gotta be nice though [giggle]

vycious: [gibberish] ah what are you doing to me here

enknot: I'm shaving you!

vycious: what are you doing to me here?

enknot: I'm shaving you

vycious: you're like mangling me!

erin: you're shaving against the grain dude

enknot: Oh, sorry.

vycious: I thought you said your dad was beautician

enknot: Yeah, it doesn't mean I'm genetically good at this shit dude

enknot: Look at that it's like a mound of hair

vycious: ahhh easy!

enknot: It's really him. I didn't just find some bum off the street

vycious: I'm not a bum!

enknot: Shut up bitch!

vycious: ahh!

enknot: That was an action shoot

enknot: Say my name

vycious: you are hurting me

enknot: Say my name

vycious: you are really hurting me

[laughter]