Category: food

04/14/13 01:16 - ID#57518

good morning, cafe taza

love the drawing of brena

Earlier this week I picked up a smokin' joe mocha for (e:Terry)

Permalink: good_morning_cafe_taza.html
Words: 24
Location: Buffalo, NY
Last Modified: 04/14/13 01:23

Category: friends

04/14/13 01:11 - ID#57517

for e:paul

Permalink: for_e_paul.html
Words: 2
Location: Buffalo, NY
Last Modified: 04/14/13 01:11

Category: ideas

04/11/13 11:59 - ID#57503

Sadistic Monster

Permalink: Sadistic_Monster.html
Words: 8
Location: Buffalo, NY
Last Modified: 04/11/13 11:59

Category: ideas

04/06/13 11:49 - ID#57469

Privilege

I'm posting these links as part of an ongoing conversation between me & (e:Terry) but also informed by various conversations with/between (e:bluevelevetjac)k and (e:yesthatcasey).

The classic piece by Peggy McIntosh:

A more modern take using gaming as a metaphor:

I heard an excellent piece on The Best of the Left about white privilege

but couldn't find the actual story... maybe I'll spend some time tomorrow searching more.

Peace & love

YesThatCasey writes at 10:00:09 04/08/13 - Comment #69589: I'm asking these questions for a reason before I chime in.

Robert writes at 08:15:18 04/08/13 - Comment #69588: (e:yesthatcasey) since i've grown out of adolescence i see more and more the priveleges i get, or rather, i see what i am afforded because i see what friends of mine are denied in the exact same situations exhibiting the exact same behaviors as myself, while i am allowed to just glide on through jolly as i please thinking life is just peachy. life IS peachy, but sometimes it's not if you aren't a straight white male (or don't have passing status (you pass as a straight white male although you are not one/some/all of those categories)) and rarely, sometimes it's not if you ARE a (straight) white male. which is something i experienced as a child, but mostly for the white part, which if i'm not mistaken, you may have shared that experience. I grew up in a predominantly black neighborhood and went to a predominatnly black school, and i was regular other'd by my friends and classmates. think of any racial slurs for whites and i was called any one, or all of them on any given day with creative additions or variations. There's nothing quite like being told "shut the fuck up, you white cracker faggot ass bitch" i was also very feminine looking.

so i definitely understand perhaps where your frustration may stem from... but having been living in equally distributed or predominantly white neighborhood for the majority of my adult life, i see the differences in treatment and attitude toward whites by whites and men by men, and women by men in any combination of those adjectives, and then the subsequent change in treatment towards non-white men or women by white men or women. it's in the details, the tiny things that we have our priveleges, the small things we're afforded or what's overlooked or accepted...

YesThatCasey writes at 07:19:53 04/08/13 - Comment #69587: If this was about the title, “Privilege”, we would be having a much more productive discussion. But it isn’t. This is about white privilege, or white male privilege, or white straight male privilege, or white cisgender male privilege, and so on, which is just one of many indications of the problem that I wanted to address in my original point on the subject (which was inspired by Rita's comment to me).

Some initial questions for you or anyone that cares to join the discussion:

1) In what situations is stereotyping acceptable?
2) Following your groups approach to this systemic problem, how will we identify when (subset) privilege is no longer a problem?
3) Do you agree that there is a vast spectrum of privilege that being in a subset confers, when analyzing the individuals within that subset?
4) How do you measure and compare privilege between subsets?

Robert writes at 02:22:45 04/07/13 - Comment #69579: Rita was also talking with Casey about privilege recently! ha... seems like these topics are in our consciousness lately!

Permalink: Privilege.html
Words: 89
Location: Buffalo, NY
Last Modified: 04/06/13 11:49

Category: holiday

04/02/13 11:35 - ID#57450

flowers

My beautiful sexy girlfriend got me these flowers and pussy willows for Dyngus Day. So sweet!

Permalink: flowers.html
Words: 18
Location: Buffalo, NY
Last Modified: 04/02/13 11:35

Category: home

03/29/13 12:38 - ID#57437

Valentine's Day

One of the awkward things about inviting (e:Dianne) to participate in (e:strip) is that I'm using to sharing about my life with A and I know that relationship makes her uncomfortable. Her face tenses up and she withdraws just a touch when I mention him. (sigh) I'm gonna continue sharing all the pieces of my crazy life...

I was home briefly Wednesday and Thursday. I got dinner for A, his dad, brother and me and we all hung out in the living room, talked about taxes and family and work, and I had to leave. I think that makes about four hours for the entire month of March that I've spent with him.

My (belated) Valentine's Day present from A. Our friend HokE

blows glass and made these.

Cuddling on the couch with fuzzy puppy and fuzzy A.

I miss home. I miss Nisha. I miss Jill. I miss hiking and quiet and stars. I'm really hoping the next year will make it easier to balance between.

Permalink: Valentine_s_Day.html
Words: 179
Location: Buffalo, NY
Last Modified: 03/29/13 01:54

Category: holiday

03/26/13 01:55 - ID#57426

dyngus day

for everyone's favorite sadists.

Permalink: dyngus_day.html
Words: 5
Location: Buffalo, NY
Last Modified: 03/26/13 01:55

Category: tourism

03/23/13 02:45 - ID#57415

A quick trip to Canada

(e:Dianne) got her enhanced drivers license last week and wanted to visit her first foreign country: CANADA! She wanted to make it a romantic getaway and prevent me from working so she booked us a room (jacuzzi!) at a B&B in Niagara Falls, ON. We showed up at the B&B and there was no one there and it didn't look like anyone had been there for over 24 hours. Uh oh. She called and left a message. We made a quick stop to look at the falls (cold, windy, wet, we didn't stop long) then we went to the shiny tourist area to find some food. We checked every bar/grill and none had a decent beer selection so we went to one with a good pizza selection. The pizza was good - they were great about making a ridiculously custom pizza - half pepperoni, olives and mushrooms, half roasted red pepper, artichoke and zuccini. There was a nice 3/4" gutter between the two sets of toppings. Then we discussed what to do about the no b&B problem, and decided that camping at my house would be preferable to getting a room at the Sheraton or something (all of 24 miles from my house), as long as I kept my phone on airplane mode. We knew there was good beer in my fridge. Then we cruised the actual downtown part of NF looking for the brewpub I had heard of when I went on a photoshoot there (e:heidi,50473) - definitely wanna go there sometime.

(e:Dianne) took pix of the falls, hope she'll post them.

I hadn't informed her what the boarder crossing would be like, what kind of questions to be prepared for, so she was really nervous and the Canadian guard was a little suspicious until she said it was her first time. Then on the way back, she was ready for the questions... and the convo went like this:

US Border Guard: What's your citizenship?
(e:Dianne): Buffalo
US Border Guard: uh... got a passport for that?

I was rolling.

Crossing the Peace Bridge

This morning at Taza (I probably should get a coffee maker but I do enjoy going to Taza when she spends the night. She has her own punch card now.) She really liked the Nightmare before Christmas(?) mug she got.