I was told today that my journal is boring b/c there's no boy talk anymore. So, here you go.

To all the doubters who thought I was crazy-

The 'double-date' with Dan and his new GF was a SUCCESS. (all in all).

My friend/date was not as interactive as I wanted him to be (i.e. he kind of refused to hang out with Dan and GF so I had to choose who to talk to) but... oh well. And he wouldn't come for post-show drinks, so I ended up being a bit of an awkward third wheel for that part, but it was still ok.

But, I think we all got over our nervousness after about 2min, had some sushi/drinks at Papaya, and then the show. We all had fun, she's a sweetheart, and I think we put his mind at ease that we can coexist in peace.

And that was my goal. Dan is a fun and funny guy... and we have a good connection, on a lot of levels, that I don't have with many other people in Buffalo. And I always had a blast with him and his friends. So it makes me sad to think that we can't hang out just b/c we're not dating. I mean of course I understand his apprehension, and I know not everyone can do it, but I really am confident that we can still hang out platonically, and have fun. B/c I miss that- more than I miss the sex or anything else.

I also ran into some friends AT the show, who I didn't know were going to be there. I explained that "the tall guy over there is my ex", and one said to the other "Ok. We have an ex situation here. We have to be ALL OVER our girl tonight!!" Which I thought was sweet of them.
Until I went to the bar for a drink a little while later and was told "oh btw they left." Gee, thanks guys. Worst wingmen ever!! LOL.

So that's my current boy situation.
Have met another guy who is very cute and very fun... but he's into the 21 year old chippewa type. He calls me all the time to hang out and always includes me and today called me "part of the inner circle" and asked for my LAST name to put in his phone- but the other day referred to me as "one of the boys", which I think is the kiss of death. Bummer, but oh well.

As The Hold Steady says, "there's always other boys, there's always other boyfriends- you can make them like you."

And in other news...
I finally did my last required case the other day, so I have now officially met all requirements for graduation. That's a good feeling.
And, yesterday was my last day at ECMC. For EVER. THAT is an even BETTER feeling. Now just to find out if they're really going to make me go back to BGH.

On monday I leave for vacation- a week in Belgium, and a week at home looking for an apt in Hartford, and hopefully seeing my sister and the bebe. It is going to be a struggle to not eat tons of chocolate and beer and kill my diet!

Oh yeah on that note- as of this AM- down 22lb. (I don't mean to be obnoxious and brag about it- but I'm pretty psyched.)

And I will leave you with a (blurry) picture of my "senior picture" for the graduation composite. Not a bad pic, even though I think I look like a real estate agent. ha!

"Impress your friends with our sweet dance moves!"
hahahahahahahhaha

So... the son of a local real estate mogul [i'm leaving out the name as i don't feel like being googly today] was in a bad car accident fri night, as you may have heard. (it was in the buffalo news etc).
I hadn't heard about it, but started getting messages from friends asking what was up, and then seeing "prayers with the family" updates on facebook.
So today I went to the ICU to see how he was doing... well the answer was not well.
And as much as I would have liked to update my friends, it would be a huge violation of patient confidentiality etc etc, so I had to keep it to myself.
So when I got the calls tonight "he died" it was like "yeah, i know, i'm so sorry."

But so now everyone is flipping out about how sad and tragic it is.

And it absolutely is. I am not debating that ONE BIT.

The only thing that bothers me is that this happens I'd say at least weekly, and more in the summer.

And there is no big media circus about it.

And now there is.

Just kinda sad that it's suddenly so much MORE of a tragedy if your dad is famous. :(

In any case... sad story all around, and my thoughts are with his family and friends. :(

from my dad...

Even more amazing than the baby cuteness is the fact that my technophobe mother took these pix on her phone, and emailed them to me.

omg, this is awesome:

I've lost 10% of my bodyweight. :)
(now for another 10%!)

1: I just saw (e:MK) on the news!!!

2: I just made this and it's super delicious (though I used 4x the recommended amount of red pepper flakes. And a splash of Franks):

Ingredients
1 spray(s) cooking spray
1 medium onion(s), finely chopped
4 medium garlic clove(s), minced
45 oz canned black beans, undrained, divided (three 15 oz cans)
1/2 tsp red pepper flakes, or to taste (MORE MORE MORE!)
1 tsp ground cumin
14 1/2 oz fat-free chicken broth, or vegetable broth
10 oz canned tomatoes with green chilies, such as Rotel Tomatoes
11 oz canned yellow corn, drained

Instructions
Coat bottom of a large stockpot with cooking spray. Add onion and garlic and cook, stirring frequently, until onions are soft but not brown, about 5 minutes.

Place one can of beans in blender; add sautéed onion mixture, red pepper flakes and cumin. Cover and blend on high until smooth, about 30 seconds. Pour mixture back into stockpot.

Place second can of beans and broth in blender and puree until smooth; add to stockpot.

Stir third can of beans (do not puree first), tomatoes and green chilies, and corn into stockpot. Bring to a boil, lower heat to medium and simmer for 20 to 25 minutes. Yields about 1 1/2 cups of soup per serving.

3: I got my dad a digital picture frame for his bday, and am enjoying loading it up for him. Found some new pix that my mom was apparently hiding from me:

Oh my, where to start. As usual, this is a lovely story of me and my stupid constant drama.

A few weeks ago, I met these two guys through a friend. One is older and more of a 'good guy'. The other is younger and cuter and probably more of a player. I went to 'movie night' at the first guy's house. The other guy had a date there, and they were all smoochy- I didn't think much of it.

The next weekend (last weekend) I saw them again. Younger guy was cute and flirty and all over me- made a point of telling me he is NOT dating the girl from movie night. I was kind of psyched about the attention. But then, all of the sudden, he disappeared. I was a little confused by it. But he texted the next day to apologize- some friend had a crisis and he had to leave suddenly, and he was sorry. But I talked to my friend that introduced us, and she said "omg NO. Stay away. he's nuts. He will break your heart. I promise you that. You know I never tell you what to do about guys. But do yourself a favor and do NOT date him. Have fun, enjoy him as a friend, but do NOT date him." Of course, I did not like that advice, so when he invited me out again on saturday, I went. When I got to the party, he introduced to some little bimbo chick, and they joked about how they've never dated but people think they have. Or something. he was all flirty with me the rest of the night, inviting me to stay over, etc- but I didn't. A hug and a little kiss, but that was it. Work in the AM, etc etc.

Then throughout the week he was sending me flirty texts, "have a great day hun" "can't wait to see you again this weekend" etc.

So saturday he had told me where he'd be out. I had to go to a friend's going away party first. And eventually ditched my friends, like an asshole, to go meet this guy, all alone. I get there, and the first person I see is the guy i dated around christmas, who harassed me about being "busting out of my shirt" (which I was NOT by any means, particularly when compared to the other girls there.) (but besides, that's not something people usually complain about.) he was there with some girl I don't like, so I was hiding from them the rest of the night. [and am still taking the heat for that today.]

But so I get up to the bar, and see 'my' guy. Making out with some girl. WTF! He sees me and runs over to introduce me to his girlfriend. Who i then realized was the girl from the week before, that he was "not dating." By the end of the night I asked "isn't that the girl you said you weren't dating last week?" and he said 'yeah! we just got together. it's so great. she's moved in. we're living together. i'm going to marry this girl."

yeeaaahhhh. You've been dating less than a week. Good luck with that one. And it also strikes me as odd that he didn't seem to have the slightest clue that this might possibly be confusing or upsetting to me. Just kept asking me "isn't she great? don't you love her?" (I wanted to say "um, no, she's a stupid chippewa bimbo with uggs, a fake tan, and bleached, straightened hair. they're a dime a dozen.")

Oh, and while I was at the bar, guess who else walked in- my ex from when I first moved here. The guy I dated for a year. fortunately there is no drama there, and we chatted and it was fine.

So, with my tail between my legs, I went BACK to hang out with the friends I had ditched for this guy. Fortunately they are good friends and didn't care that I'd left them. By this point, the only ones left were the friend who's moving, and his girlfriend's brother. And the three of us stayed out til 5am. It was a lot of fun.

Girlfriend's brother was chatting me up. kept saying 'I love this girl!" and then he'd say "i'm married with three kids, i'm harmless, i can flirt as much as I want." And he went on about how this city is so tough for single people, and he feels bad for me. That he thinks I'm amazing... beautiful, smart, funny, successful, blah blah blah. I mean, he told me how amazing I am so many times that it started to make me uncomfortable. How many times can I smile and say "aw, thanks!"?

and then he said "do you know why you can't meet a guy in buffalo?" I said "i dunno... i'm kind of shy? I don't look in the right places?" he laughed and said 'you're not shy, you're talking to me and we just met!" I said "yeah, but you approached ME." But he said "no no no. that's not it. You won't meet someone here because you're too good for them all. AND, because you're fatass."

FATASS. he said it like 50 times. That I'm so amazing, BUT 'you need to go to the gym. But you know that I'm sure. Just get on the treadmill for a month and you'll be amazing."

So the next day at the parade we all called me Fatass. "no breakfast for her, she's a fatass!" etc. I told my friend M that story, and he said "oh please. you're not a fatass. you're in your thirties. It's what happens." I love M. :)

The thing is, he hit my most sensitive spot, which is why it sucked.

Though- fatass apparently is right. I weighed myself this am- I gained FIVE pounds since YESTERAY. FIVE! In one day! I didn't even think that was possible! And I didn't eat that much- and I had even budgeted in one 'bad' day for the week! I'm hoping it's just water weight. Booo.

So, there you go peeps. The latest installment in my personal soap opera!! Thanks for reading! haha.

What a weird day...

First of all, as I drove home yesterday, I think it was about 50+ out, with blue skies- it felt like spring. I was happy.

This morning- it snowed.

When I got to work, I parked in an amazing parking spot, and was happy. No 'no parking' sign anywhere. I checked.

When I came out of work, I had a parking ticket. The no parking sign was in the form of yellow lines on the pavement, which were covered with snow when I parked.

I had my yearly inservice exam back in the end of january. this year's was particularly important, because they told me that if I didn't do well, they might not let me graduate. (and if I don't graduate, I am fucked. Like, have wasted 12 years and 200K, fucked.)

Well, scores were due out this week. I got mine in the mail yesterday. It's better than last year, but still not fantastic.

Well.... this morning I saw our program director. He waved me over and said "doc, talk to me." I thought "oh shit."
But- he put out his hand and said congratulations, I've done well, and that his recommendation to the board will be that I graduate. Won't be official til the board meeting in april, but he says I don't need to worry.

THANK EFFING GOD.

THEN... I went to the OR. Did a case with an attending I like. As we were getting ready, he said "come talk to me" and so I followed him while we scrubbed our hands. He said "you know we all talk about you guys, right?" I said 'yeah...' He said "well yesterday people were talking, and someone said that you have the best hands in your class. I can't say who said it, but I just thought you might like to hear that."

Then he went in to the OR. While I finished scrubbing, another attending, who as always hated me, (like "tried to get me fired" hated me) came up behind me and startled me by saying 'have I ever told you how good looking you are?"

HUH????? 1: WTF. 2: Inappropriate!!!!! 3: EW.

What a crazy day!