Sorry for being so snippy in my last entry - I've made a lot of progress but sometimes I still get frustrated. I'll explain why I was frustrated in another entry, "The Sophia of Jason, Part III" which will be published sometime later.

Anyway, what is on my mind today? Remember when I bitched that I went out with Jerry on Halloween and had to be the third wheel all night? Apparently that night at Faherty's a friend of a friend thought I was cute. I never found out until a couple of weeks ago, and anyway dating hasn't crossed my mind much, so my radar's been a little off.

When dating has crossed my mind, I've always thought "No, no, this can't happen now, I'm not 100% together yet. I need more time!" I was afraid that if the timing was off I wouldn't be able to do it the right way. This week I've thought about it more and I've changed my mind - maybe it IS the right time. Who am I to be so rigid about when the right time would be? Maybe this is what I need to take my progress to the next level, and anyway who doesn't like a little diddling now and then?

She isn't a very forward person, so there wasn't really a way for me to know for sure until I met her roommate the other day. She's definitely down, and so am I. I know what your first question will be, and yes she is a Republican, but not the mercenary type by a long shot. She told me the more I would try to spend spend spend the more she would resist it. She doesn't care at all that I'm broke now, or that my car's a heap, or that I need a haircut.

For the first time I feel like I have an opportunity to wow someone I like by being my charming, kind, brilliant, golden-hearted, and humble self. The thing is, if I like someone I can barely talk to her, or look her in the eyes and smile at her, but that's what I want to do the most. I'll chillax, don't worry. Doc Lurve, heeeelp!

Far from being a barbie, she has a quick wit and an off sense of humor, much like myself. I see a lot of myself in her (but not the good part, yet, ZING). Oh, and it doesn't hurt that she is a former figure skater, and mediterranean, so she is very, VERY alluring. The other night when we were out I had the constant, almost irresistable urge to wrap my arms around her body and probe her oral cavity but you'll be happy to know I was a perfect gentleman. Next time, I make no promises.

So last night I sent her a text asking when I could see her again. I know better than to get ahead of myself or make assumptions so for now I'm just happy to get to know her more and get out of the house to have fun. I'm such a dork. Maybe that's part of my charm.

Not only is it wrong in principle to try and shut people up, it is incredibly stupid, and exposes an adolescent inability to deal with other people.

Seriously, grow the fuck up. If you don't like what someone says, you aren't obligated to read their journals. I had this problem once and I can honestly say it is beyond ridiculous. I am the #1 nastiest and most vicious asshole on this site when I want to be, by a very wide margin, and yet I don't feel the compulsion to knock someone every single time they write some colossaly stupid entry.

Do you want to know why? Oh never mind.

Who else loves this show? I'm sure pretty much everyone loves Extreme Home Makeover. They find a family that really needs an update, send them off to vacation for a week, and then when they get back they have a brand-new, spiffy home to call their own. They are always very good stories, cancer survivors, people who give of themselves, the kinds of people we love to see happy.

I heard something on NPR this morning on the way to work that made me very upset. Did you know that when someone gets an extreme home makeover, their new digs are considered "winnings" as if they won a lottery prize? Did you know that as a result the IRS comes to these people with their hands out, saying "where's mine?" That's right folks, the lucky new homeowners are presented with a big fat tax bill, and if you know how much a house costs the tax bill definitely ain't gonna be cheap. I wonder if after the cameras turn off a bunch of suits go up to the lucky family and ruin their day by notifying them of their five figure obligation to the IRS.

......Served hot and fresh, like crumpets and tea, based mostly on some links I found on Drudge this morning.

The Democrats have tried hard to sell "new direction" as their slogan, while at the same time denying what that new direction really means. The newly elected leadership has said that it is not the Democrats' intention to cut-and-run, or surrender, or to leave Iraq in a state of chaos, nor is it their intention to cut off funding.

Only a few bold souls have been willing to be honest with us about their intentions, and while I may not agree 100% with them, at least they are not trying to bullshit us.

Kucinich proposes removing the funds for the military operations (from The Dennis Kucinich web site):

Carl Levin proposes near-term troop withdrawal (Breitbart):

Mitt Romney, detestable to liberals because he is a Mormon, and detestable to evangelicals because, well, he's a Mormon, opens up on the Boston Media for having two points of view - the liberal view and the progressive view (paraphrasing, from mediabistro):

Nanny state politics are alive and well, and someone recently laughed at me when I said that eventually smoking will be banned in general, sooner than later being very likely. Laugh no more! Here we have the first American city to ban smoking. All I can say is that at least it isn't criminalized (for now).

Smoking Ban Article on San Mateo Daily Journal:

Al Gore just can't stay out of the spotlight, can he? He's recently said that he might not go into politics again, because he is very comfortable and happy being an environmental activist. Hmmm. I don't think you can be an activist and NOT be political. That's kind of the point, isn't it Al? I think he's really enjoying the attention he's getting. Personally, I think he's more effective doing what he's doing now than being part of the government.

Al Gore calls Aussies and Americans "Bonnie and Clyde" of Global Warming:

Aussie PM John Howard Hits Back at Gore, Promotes Nuclear Energy: 't-panic-just-wait-for-a-more-convenient-truth-urges-howard/2006/11/13/1163266484014.html#

Lastly, a comment based on some things I read in the Jerusalem Post last night. The left here and in Europe may not be taking Ahmedinejad seriously, as proven by that unwatchable Mike Wallace interview, but I'm going to tell you right now that Israelis have had enough. They've also had enough concerning the Palestinians. With Europe being completely unsympathetic, with Iran's nuclear games only being given lip service, and with bodies piling up on a daily basis on both sides of the border with Gaza, I've been hearing many Israelis stating that they want this nonsense to END, period, and what does that mean? It means this shit is going to come to a head very soon. When told that it would end if they could just give up more land, they say "We gave them Gaza and now it is only more or less a staging ground for attacks." If there was ever a time to prove to people that diplomacy is the only solution, it is now, but I have my doubts.

And I'm not using those words lightly:



Jason

Not to break up the rants or parties you guys are enjoying, but I have to ask you all something. You're all just talking about the national elections, and you're happy that the "corrupt, unethical" Republicans no longer have control - yet we just elected two real gems to Albany, and I want to know why nobody is talking about it. I suspect it's a case of see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil, or a case of just looking the other way. I hate to be so cynical but that's the way it looks.

Alan Hevesi (D) - An out and out THIEF of taxpayer dollars for his own personal purposes, and a repeat offender to boot. Famous for doing the same thing in the city. Oh, what a guy, he repaid it after he got caught. Unethical, inappropriate, and apparently completely acceptable to Democrats. I heard a good comment on the radio yesterday. Someone said "Who better to look after thieves than a thief? Who knows them better?"

Antoine Thompson (D) - This notorious yes-man, and proponent of the casino ran UNOPPOSED, which speaks to our local apathy and carelessness when it comes to local elections. Can you believe that people who will be harmed most by the Casino voted for this guy? And here we have to deal with the tired, incorrect rhetoric about Republican voters not voting for their own interests, which makes 750 howl with laughter. What a joke, an absolute joke, and nobody is talking about it. Why?

Oh, be happy that the Republicans no longer have national power, but hang your heads in shame and self-loathing after you learn that we continue to move backwards locally. The local elections are what matter the most to us on a day to day basis, and we are asleep at the wheel, mindlessly turning the (D) option in support of people who never should be in office.

The Democrats have, as expected, taken at least one portion of Congress away from the Republicans. I have mixed feelings about this, because I think replacing a group of far right wingers with a group of far left wingers will not result in anything useful for the majority of people.

We will still have minority beliefs and values forced upon us, but they will be of a different nature. I don't think having one party in control of the legislative and executive branch is helpful, so in a way I think it is better overall that things have gone this way, although nothing of any consequence will be done in the next two years.

I will guarantee you one thing - all of the talk of fraud, trickery, illegal activity, so on and so forth, all of this stuff is going to disappear into thin air, and why? Because in the end the left got their desired result. As long as they get their result the rest is sort of insignificant. When Democrats win, obviously nothing out of the ordinary happened. The one liner is "No loss? No problem!" I doubt we'll ever read another Niman rant about this, nor will it be plastered all across the mainstream press. It appears to me that it was all faux outrage. I hope that I'm wrong, and that there are a lot more DCoffee types out there who really give a shit about something other than victory for their party.

Rummy is now gone, and I don't think anyone would disagree at this point that it's the best thing for everybody. I would hate to work for a boss like that.

Congress is going to be locked in investigation hell, and every kook conspiracy theory is going to be given the kind of respect they should never receive. This is going to get very boring very quickly.

The Democrats won in part by courting moderate candidates. This is interesting to me because the House leadership will now be comprised almost entirely of far-left liberals, not moderates. Pelosi (if you believe Time magazine) is infamous for bending people to her will who disagree with her. America voted for Moderates, and that's not the kind of leadership we are going to receive.

I know there are those of you who are begging to have your taxes raised. Pelosi and Schumer have said repeatedly recently that they are not going to raise the rich's taxes, or anyone else's taxes! Do any of you really believe this? Will the Democrats wait until 2010 for Bush's tax cuts to expire? Absolutely not. Not a chance.

How many of you want Bush to be impeached? First of all, if you are thinking seriously about this, you do not know what it is you are asking for, because if you did you would understand that 67 senators need to agree on it. Pelosi and Schumer and the rest have also repeatedly said that Impeachment is off the table. Either they are lying or they are going to disappoint a lot of liberals.

What of Iraq? This is what voters went to the polls to protest. They say they will not "cut and run," but I don't see how moving our troops out of Iraq is indicative of any other attitude. Anyway Bush is still at the top of the military food chain. I see no significant changes in America's Iraq policy. If anything, people are going to vote to cut the funding of the war, in lieu of sticking their necks out for a major policy change.

How will the Democrat leadership do its job? It is going to be gridlock. All that is going to happen is a push for the '08 elections, and the Democrats aren't going to be active enough to hang themselves, if they are smart. They will leave the decisions concerning America's foreign and domestic policy to the UN, or to Paris.

I'm not happy, but then again there wasn't a result of this election that I would be happy with. I feel like it was a choice of bad or worse, and bad is still bad, you know?

Whether you are a proud American or not, the only way we can make things better is if we take ownership of this, our country, and show the incumbents they just aren't good enough. I'll be voting strictly along anti-incumbent lines today. Whether you're straight up commie or a fascist pig, get out there and stake your claim to our great nation and vote.

After yesterday's rant, I've decided it's time to elaborate a bit more on why certain things upset me so.

I try my best not to be a jealous person, and I'm about 95% of the way there. I've not been a jealous person in my relationships, or my personal dealings, but there are certain situations that really bring it out of me - one of them being Jerry's magnetic attraction to the ladies.

I absolutely cannot stand it when someone has so many opportunities, and then bitches about not having what they think they deserve. You see this all the time from lovely women who complain about dozens of guys approaching her, but never the right ones! I can't even tell you how bad my language gets when I hear stuff like that.

I wish I could have even half of the opportunities Jerry gets. I think he takes it for granted, and that really rubs me the wrong way because in the end it becomes an entitlement. If I had around five or so girls vying for my attention I probably would have chosen one. And yeah, part of it involves sex with hot girls but moreso it is about having someone look at you in a way that lets you know how much they want you, how they enjoy being with you. That's what really bothers me, that I don't have THAT in my life. Part of me craves attention, admiration, love and acceptance - instead of constantly having your balls broken.

I'm not nearly as good looking as Jerry, although if I must say so I think I'm a relatively good looking guy. I don't have the whole dark feature thing and that opens many doors. But really what I'm missing is the will to just go for it. There is only a small percentage of girls who I'm willing to make that kind of effort to attract, and it has less to do with looks than her outlook towards life. There are a lot of beautiful girls but only a select few are grounded enough and "human" enough for me to make the effort.

One of them wrote to Jerry recently asking if he's hiding from her. Now, I don't know this chick very well, but my impression is highly favorable. She is definitely not the kind of girl that Jerry normally hangs out with. She seems like an absolute doll. She almost has a negative attitude towards herself, and I can't explain how much I just want to laugh and explain to her how unique she is. I would kill (not really) to have an opportunity to have a girl like that in my life. Of course sappy doesn't sell so I would have to translate that into something better. Anyway I'm jealous as all hell that he has this kind of attention from the girls and I don't. I feel like I would be able to take an opportunity and run with it. I'm not perfect by any means but I could enhance someone's life in some ways.

I'm trying so hard to not be jealous, and to think of the great things I have to offer that other people don't. I know that I'm unique too. It's just so difficult sometimes to get over this stuff and to move on and get what you want.

In staying with tradition, I have to once again rant about some things that will appall you and make you respect me less.

(e:Ladycroft)'s motto is "Say what you mean, and mean what you say" and I thought about that for hours last night. Okay, Jerry is hooking up with his intern, a freshly minted 21 year old, and he wanted me to go with him to this girl's apartment party last night. I thought, "Oh, shit,hell naw bro" until he introduced the tease: There would be plenty of hot chicks there who are going to WANT you, Jason! Well holy hell who could say no to that? And then over the course of the week he sent me links to pics of the girls who were interested. Needless to say I was absolutely excited about the prospect.

Despite not feeling my best for a few days I went with him, really only because he promised me hot ass, otherwise I would have stayed home. I cleaned up, shaved, got all nice smelling and whatnot, put on my costume (Monk re-hash) and got in the car. When we got there I met the girl Jerry's hooking up with, and she was actually a decent enough chick, but where the fuck were the girls Jerry told me about? Some fat bitch asked me where my little boy was ("I'm a MONK, not a priest, you retard!") but the girls Jerry told me about were nowhere to be found. Ummm, what the fuck?!?! It was at this moment when I realized I had been utterly BAMBOOZLED and tricked into accompanying Jerry to this travesty so that he wouldn't feel weird. How could he do this to me?!?!?

But oh, does it ever get worse - I was relegated to third wheel status as we jetted around town, my bitterness and discontentment reaching critical levels with every bar visit. Some chick grabbed my ass at Gordon's, which I guess is better than nothing. Faherty's was alright, but said bartender who hooked me up with a nice shot of Jameson's earlier in the week was having absolutely none of it from me. Too bad because I would have totally respected her and treated her the way a woman deserves to be treated, such and such and so forth. Hell no, I would have drilled her like a Texas Oil man. The closest prospect was a friend of a friend, a known Swinger but that fell through at the last moment as her brother pulled her out of the joint. Fat Bob's was okay, but really at this point I was about 6-8 drinks in the bag and in a terrible mood. When you were tricked into being a mobile support group and third wheel you tend to just want to throw caution to the wind and pickle yourself.

I began to think about how Jerry basically hoards the girls, putting many on the back burner while one gets his attention, all the while making vague suggestions about maybe pushing one of them off to me. Never happens. I also thought about the ridiculous comments he made about Walt "dominating" when he came here. It's times like this when you just have to admit to yourself that you have a hot friend, and you're the equivalent of the ugly chick who tags along in the hopes of getting some runoff. Jason, you're never going to get what you want so just fucking move on and live with it!

If he would have just been straight up with me to begin with I might not have gone, or I might have just because he's my best buddy, but the worst thing to do is tease me with hot ass, promise me a fun, nasty, sex filled night and then end up being a total liar. I am fucking PISSED. I wish I would have just stayed home, unshowered and stoned and perfectly happy. At least I only paid for one drink.