Dearest peeps-
I would like for this to all just be over, but I feel the need to respond, hopefully for the last time.

Ok, yes, I was harsh and deserve some of what I got, and I accept that. But I hope it is apparent that I was just pissed about the weather, and venting, in MY JOURNAL. And I KNOW I am not the only one who has had those feelings now and again. I was exaggerating and overreacting, sure. Of course I do not HATE Buffalo. I think where you live, and your happiness there, is largely what you make of it, and is largely determined by the people you surround yourself with. And I have met a lot of great people here, largely in part to this site. And I think our hometown will always hold a special place in our hearts, no matter what others think.

Yes, Buffalo has a lot of good things about it. But it is not perfect- nowhere is. And I still maintain that the demographic does not really favor the young professional. And the length of the winter stinks. Even if it doesn't snow every day for seven months, the fact that you have to reasonably expect it might, is a bit hard to handle at times.

To respond to the comment roundup- no, I did not have a gun to my head when I signed on the dotted line. However it was the only option available to me to continue my career. Sure, I could have abandoned medicine altogether and not moved.

"Your statement implies that the only reason ANYONE would love Buffalo is because he or she is a stupid ignorant hick who has never lived in a "real" city or even knows what one is."

I am sorry if you inferred that from my statement- that is not what I was trying to imply. I am not calling people hicks for liking Buffalo. I apologize for my statement and can see why people were offended.
I won't define what I think makes a "real" city- but I think we can all agree that Buffalo is not NYC, or LA, or Chicago. Nor is it backwoods redneck-land.

And finally, is an emotional outburst about not being happy about where I live as bad as this personal attack: "you expressed a certain level of ignorance and stupidity that would make you virtually indistinguishable from the Long Island morons"? I may be a lot of things, but I do not thing ignorant, stupid, or moron are on that list.

Josh I did not take personal offense at your comment since I know what you were getting at- but my point is just that responding to my bitching with personal insults is not such a great thing to do either.

I overreacted for sure- but maybe everyone else did too?

In any case, this has turned into far too big a deal and I'm sick of worrying about it, and I hope it can just be over, as I'm sure you all do too. I am still the person you know (or don't) and love (or don't)- nothing has changed. The sun is coming (I know it is, it has to be!), and I think it will make us ALL feel better. :)

All my love, friends,
-J

P.S. Bonus points to (e:metalpeter)- yes that was Tony singing. It was his old band, Molotov Cocktail, Inc. I, for one, am quite impressed. Almost a little Blues Travelerish at the beginning, I think.

I'm too tired to get into it, but- how many times do I have to apologize?! I AM SORRY! ok? :'(

Ok ok I take it back, I freaking LOVE buffalo, and all the snow! Am I forgiven? Can we all be friends again? :) Seriously, didn't mean to hit such a nerve... sorry about that.

So a friend of mine has been trying to arrange a not-too-obvious meeting between me and some cute guy she knows. Doesn't want to be too high school about it, and is trying to make it look like I just 'happened' to show up while he was there. But it's turning into a wild goose chase. The other night I got a message at like 11:30 "come to mother's! now! quick! he's here!" and then five minutes later "nevermind, he left." Good thing, b/c I was in bed anyway.

But so this saga continued last night, with the added complication that I was on call, and knew I'd have to go back in, just didn't know when. But so I met them at Stillwater (but he wasn't there), and as soon as I arrived, "the group" had decided to go to dinner at the Viking Lobster Company. Kind of a hole in the wall, with a 1-page xerox menu- fish fry, steak, or lobster, or a combo thereof. Of course, as soon as I ordered, I got called back for some utter bullshit at the hospital, and I had to go. Eventually made it back as everyone else was almost done and my food was cold, but nonetheless it was pretty damn good. Though I feel a little guilty that I keep getting these free dinners from my friend's BF. But he won't take my money, so I guess I should just enjoy it.

And her BF is a pretty cool guy. And, since Buffalo is a one degree of separation kind of place, I shouldn't be surprised that he knows people i know. And even knows cool stuff about people I know.

To the point that I have a pop quiz for you peeps-

Listen to this song and tell me if you can guess who's singing. Hint: we all know and love him.

::DOWNLOAD SOUND::

apparently there's a video that goes with it, but I couldn't find it online.

So that was the cool part of the night. The shitty part- that in my rush to get to/from the hospital and not miss all of dinner, I made a mess.

I got there, and went to park in the last spot. It was at the end of a row, there was plenty of room. See diagram.



There was a car to my left, but nothing to the right. Tons of space. But there was a dumb street lamp at the end of the line marking the space. As I walked in, I thought 'i have to remember to be careful when I leave to back straight out so I don't hit that thing."

Well then work was annoying and I was mad, so when I left I was cranky, and what did I do? forget about the stupid light, and turn as I backed out.

I just heard this sickening CRUNCH as the right front end scraped against the light. I thought 'well I wasn't going fast, I stopped right away, how bad can it be?" I was hoping I just scuffed the fender...

Well no. The whole bumper was practically on the ground. turn signal and fog light all mashed up. God dammit.

And i don't want to drive around all ghetto with my bumper held on with string, but I can't take it in til at least tuesday...

It's still driveable, it's not MAJOR damage as far as I can tell, but I'm sure they'll have to order all sorts of parts. Anyone want to wager on the cost? I'm guessing $1000, but I sure hope I'm wrong.

UGH!

So anyway... happy saturday peeps. I think I'll go do laundry.

Oh and my buddy Fantastic Kyle (see previous post) is IMing me again-

2:17 PM
Hi there
How have you been?
2:20 PM
Are you there?
2:30 PM
I hope I haven't upset you
3:15 PM
Are you ignoring me?

Gee dude, what do you think????

Pardon this rant, but this weather is pushing my anti-Buffalo sentiments over the edge.

I mean WHAT THE FUCK. Why does anyone live in a place that snows from halloween to easter? That's SEVEN MONTHS of the year. We have snow for more than 50% of the year. It's ridiculous.

Everyone around here loves to go on and on about how amazing Buffalo is. All I can think is 'if you think this is awesome, you have obviously never lived in a 'real' city, and I feel badly for you.'
It's crap. The only good thing I have here are some friends. woohoo, we have some pro sports teams. That doesn't do it for me. In fact I'd probably like Buffalo better if we had no sports. I am sick of hearing nothing but "sabres sabres sabres bills sabres bills."

Ugh. I can't wait to leave.

I mean I can handle winter. I can handle cold, and I can handle snow. But not SEVEN MONTHS of snow.

Thank god I have vacation in a couple weeks. Maybe that will lift this crappy mood of mine. Too bad I have no one to travel with, and will probably end up spending it sitting on my ass in Buffalo. In the snow probably. In May.

bleh....

Did you all see the guy on the news yesterday- the prisoner who went to the hospital, then beat up two guards, held a nurse hostage, stole a gun, escaped from the hospital, stole a car in the parking lot, robbed two banks, busted into a CPA's office, and held two more women hostage?

On top of his 46 year sentence for theft/assault/drugs?

what a fucking winner. It was all over crappy fox news yesterday. I kept seeing a loop over and over of a chick jumping out the window of the office he was in.

And two clues that this guy is a loser:
-one, his name is Billy Jack. Really. How do you name your kid Billy Jack and expect him to add up to much? I know that's bitchy, but it's true.
-two, he's a member of the Aryan Nation.

Apparently they got his mom on the phone, and she said not to shoot him. Oh, gee, ok.

And I'm also so fucking sick of hearing about anna nicole smith. It makes me a little sad that we as americans care so much about this. And fucking Sanjaya.

This is why I don't watch the news. Work was slow today so I spent half the morning doing the crossword puzzle and sudoku in the paper and watching horrid fox news b/c I couldn't reach the tv to change the channel/turn it off.

A friend told me the other day that he read my journal (which I didn't think he did, so that was weird/embarrassing), and he said "I can't believe some of the stuff you write. Do your parents read it?"
Oy. I hope not!

My ex continued to text-flirt with me again yesterday. How strange. And I think then his GF calls or he goes home from work or something b/c all of the sudden it just STOPS, mid-sentence.

And today I told a friend "I had a dream last night that you moved to Europe." (I really did). And he replied "Feels nice to be the man of your dreams". hehe, I thought that was kinda cute.

And he's some rockin' news.
So every year we have to get a "physical" at work. Which consists of checking 'no no no no no no' on a list of "have you had.... in the past year", then telling them your weight (they don't even weigh you), having your blood pressure checked, and then the key- the TB test.

Now, it's fairly common (some would say inevitable) for people in health care to "convert"- i.e. have a positive TB test eventually. And I spent time in New Orleans, aka the third world. So... this year it happened.

For the record, that just means I have been exposed. I do not HAVE TB. I am not contagious or anything like that. But once you test positive, you have about a 5% chance of developing active TB (which I think is the number one killer disease, worldwide). TB can be treated, but it's a long course of like 5 antibiotics. So once you convert, they recommend you take prophylactic antibiotics. Of course you don't HAVE to, but it's the responsible thing to do, public-health-wise. And it takes your risk down to like 0.001%, and apparently gives you 20 years of protection.

So I had my required chest xray (negative), and made my appointment at the Erie County Infectious Disease Clinic at ECMC (what a lovely experience.) And she said there are basically 3 options: take the risk and don't take abx. Take INH for 9 months. Take rifampin for 4 months.

The catch with INH is that it (can be) liver-toxic, so people freak out and are like "if you have a sip of alcohol while you're on it you will die." That is not true. (believe me, I asked.) It's more like "if you are an alcoholic, we will have to check your liver function tests every month". B/c yeah, I can go without drinking. But 9 months is a pretty long time to not even be able to have one sip of champagne. At a wedding. That I am IN.

So the alternative is rifampin. Makes you more sick to your stomach, apparently, and has this lovely side effect- it turns ALL of your body fluids orange. You pee orange. You sweat orange. You cry orange. They said it stains your contacts orange. How freaky.

So, I guess I'll be a good little girl and take the stupid INH. the perk- I never have to have another TB test again.

Ok, I guess that's about it.

Later peeps!

-rambly J

Ok, so this week at work has been super crazy/busy/shitty, and it has put me in a terrible, sleep-deprived mood. Have barely slept since wed night, and had to miss jackdaw last night, and am missing roller derby tonight since my 2 hour day turned into 12-

but somehow now I don't care about that and feel like some sort of special VIP rockstar.

My brother in law always turns me on to cool new music, including The National, whose CD "Alligator" is one of my faves. They have a new album coming out in May, and are touring (will be in Toronto in June actually- anyone?).

But so the other day he sent me an email that said 'do you still like the national? Do you have this yet?' and attached was a folder full of songs. I figured it was like their first album "before they got big" or something obscure and random like that.

It took me a few days to get around to checking it out, and I just opened it-

And it's their new CD. Due to be released May 22. I have no idea how he got his hands on it, but it made my week.

Three cheers for Chase! Yay!

Unfortunately all the songs are too big to post as user sounds, so instead I've put up "baby we'll be fine", another fave, from Alligator.

this is a boring post but someone was asking about hair places the other day...

so I usually get my hair cut at the Aveda place in the Galleria. Which is definitely a pleasant experience... herbal tea, scalp massage, etc. But it's $40 + tip, and it's a trek to the galleria. So i figured I'd try my local place- Parkway Haircutting- right next to Coles.
They have a big fancy sign and look from the outside like a pretty classy salon.

Well, they're not as nice on the inside.
Sort of barber-ish with a guy doing guy haircuts in the corner. Just two chairs, and they're not selling your usual super-expensive fancy name shampoo etc. But I figured what the hell, I don't do anything too fancy with my hair, how much can she fuck it up.

So I told charlene I wanted to take a couple inches off and gave her my rules-
that I can't be bothered with a blow dryer and that it has to be able to go in a pony tail.

And she went to town and cut all these crazy layers- I was a little nervous, but let her do her thing. She blew it dry, and it didn't look great when I left, but like I said my hair doesn't like the blow dryer.

So I went home and washed it, and so far it seems like a decent haircut.

And best of all- I was in and out (shampooed, cut, dried, etc) in 30 min flat.
And it was $20 with a UB ID.

So certainly not a Chic Salon/Spa Experience- but not bad for $20 and 30 min.

So I was playing with voip stuff this afternoon (I think I'm going to switch to Vonage- anyone have anything bad to say about them?) when this ichat window pops up, from someone not on my buddy list. I always wonder how random people I don't know find me. But I always feel rude to just totally tell them to fuck off, so I usually answer, but with minimal, one word replies.
The guy goes on and on. Tells me his name is Kyle. I don't care. "Fantastic Kyle" if his screen name is to be believed, except that he can't spell and is "FantasicKyle345" [not his real address] Asks how I am, I say fine. Then he's like "will you do me a favor? I want to try something". And I knew what was coming... "I want to try my isight camera, I never have" (yeah right). I say no. He admits that he's an exhibitionist (gee, you think?) and asks if I want him to send me pix. I say I don't care. Then I say I have to go take a shower. He says "wow! I'm in a towel! I just got out of the shower! Isn't that crazy?" No, not really. Keeps asking if I want to see his pix. Now, I am not opposed to seeing pix of attractive men. But first off I doubt he's attractive, and I'm also not into random internet exchanges with people I will never meet. So the last thing I am going to do is inflate his ego and beg him to see his pix. But he starts sending them anyway. First a face shot. He's not (that) bad looking, but it's a weird double-chin webcam pic. And then another one....ohohohoho I couldn't stop laughing at that one. And I totally wanted to post it, and then felt badly to. But then thought "no. If he is going to send his pix to random people on the internet, he deserves to have them posted randomly on the internet."
So then he keeps asking me if I like the pic and if i want to see more, and I finally tell him I have to go. And he says "no fair, I want to see your pix". And I just said "Yes, I bet you do. Goodbye." Then I went to shower and came back to a whole mess of "why did you leave?" "I'm sorry if I offended you" "will you talk to me again?"
Get over it dude.

So, here is Fantastic Kyle, for your viewing pleasure.

Ok, so as much as I am terrified of skydiving, this looks pretty cool and fun and peaceful.

It's a bunch of skydivers in formation- looking like a huge kite.

(the video is really boring, after it breaks apart the first time you might as well just turn it off.)

crap. never mind.

Paul- how do I add a video if it's not on youtube or google? It's a .wmv file on my desktop.

Ok instead you get a random picture of my "irish" dog. :/



Ok and some more random crap from today's email.
A very simple but addictive helicopter-flying game (my kind of game- one button and that's it)-


Ok, and this one is disturbing. First of all, the picture is graphic and horrifying [be warned]. I can't tell if the guy is dead, but if he's not, I bet he was shortly thereafter.

But even worse- when I clicked the pic to try to copy it to post it, it turned out the picture was a link, that took me to 'cumfiesta.com'.

Now, if you had a porn site called cumfiesta.com- is THAT how you would attract people?!

I forgot!
I made a new mix.
Link over there --->
or here


Here's the song list:

The Chills - Peter, Bjorn and John
Between the moon and the ocean - the bon savants
nobody knows me at all - the weepies
fidelity - regina spektor
true affection - the blow
barely listening - pilot speed
dashboard - modest mouse
parade of punk rock t-shirts - maritime [my user song]
stacked crooked - the new pornographers
walking with a ghost - tegan and sara
southwest planes - the western states motel
love song no. 7 - CYHSY
old catherine's box - katamine
black flowers - yo la tengo
keep the car running - arcade fire
lightbulb - mezzanine owls
lady luck - can joann
shoulders and arms - tokyo police club
searching for the ghost - heartless bastards
they - jem
girl sailor - the shins

Enjoy!
Hope you all had a good weekend. :)