Well, I'm back at the homestead, and as usual things are getting insane.
Sometimes I need to remind myself of how great I have it, and not to sweat the small stuff. Because it really is great to be home. I get to see my family, and I adore them. And play with the dog. And sleep in my childhood bedroom. It's really great. I'm perfectly content to just sit around with family- we laugh all night. I love it.

But Mom is getting usual holiday crabby. Which I understand, but it's tough, because we just can't do anything right. If we try to help, we're all just in the way and doing things wrong. If we stay out of the way, we are lazy ingrates who don't help.

Sigh.

So my dad and brother are picking my sister and her husband up at the airport, and I'm hiding out on the computer.

As much as I love being home- I love having the space/privacy of my own place.
Last night I was trying to use the computer, but my brother was just hovering over my me reading IMs and spying on email...
Not that I have anything so secret to hide, but still, it would be nice to have a little privacy.

But here's the kicker-
We have a well, and the pump died this morning.
We have NO WATER.

And mom is more worried about the dirty dishes piling up than she is about the fact that we can't flush the toilet or take showers.

And mom is doing her usual weird sadistic thanksgiving dinner. This year we are NOT having the sweet potatoes that everyone loves. But we ARE having extra chestnuts and brussels sprouts- which everyone (including mom) hates. I don't get it. But I just try to stay out of the way.

Oh boy...

Grant me strength.

Dad made the liquor run last night- tons of beer, and 7 bottles of wine since there will be seven people. Minor point- four of them don't drink.
Ha, more for me.

I made a half-assed attempt to go out last night... i.e. i texted one friend and she didn't respond. Oh well. I went to bed at 10. it was great. did have lunch with an old friend from high school though, which was great. And have been trying to catch up on some old emails. (did you hear that ladycroft? You're next!)

Am supposed to go for "holiday cocktails" at The Reading Room tomorrow. I've never been there. And frankly, am not sure why I should want to- except that women aren't allowed except for certain occasions. It's some old snooty members-only men's club (no, not a strip club). I said "sure, I'll go, but I'm not sure I brought home dressy enough clothes" and my friend replied "are they clean? that's good enough. Everyone there smells like moth balls anyway."

Yeah... good times. ;)

Mom is calling!

later peeps.

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Ok, so I just ate at Torches. I'd never even heard of it. I guess it's fairly new (a few months?)- it's where Tsunami used to be.

But it was really good.

I don't know how to write a real restaurant review, but I'll try.

We had an early reservation, and so we were the only people there when we arrived. (but by the time we left it was packed.)

It's sort of an unassuming building, but true to its name, there are lots of torches all over. And, a weird animatronic christmas penguin, that looks very out of place. Whatever.

But you walk into a little foyer area with these cool tables that are like rough-hewn stone. And the hostess greeted us and took our coats and told us about two featured wines, and gave us tastes of a Shiraz before we were even seated. I've never seen that before, and it's probably a ploy to get you to buy overpriced "featured" wine, but, eh, whatever- it was tasty.

It's a little (too) dark, but not bad, and overall the decor was nice. Certainly more a date/special occasion kind of place than "family dinner with the kids". Left Bank-ish, maybe.

And our waiter was awesome. Very funny. And attentive without being intrusive.

I had a crab cake special appetizer with some carrot ginger coulis (or something- some sauce)- it was delish. And a nice presentation. The crabcakes were maryland style, and there really was a lot of nice crabmeat. Though maybe they could have been crisped up a little more.

For an entree I had chilean sea bass and I don't know what the sauce was, but it was also great. Served on a bed of risotto, with some porcini mushrooms.

And warm caramel apple pie for dessert.

And a bottle of wine, and coffee.

I think I am going to explode. And then fall asleep. So much for the party I was thinking of going to tonight. ha!

But as the restaurant got more crowded, and we were no longer the only table, it took our waiter a few more minutes to stop by- but honestly I wouldn't have even noticed and certainly didn't think it was bad service. But then he came over- he said he was sorry if he'd neglected us, but that things were a little crazy since Janice Okun (buffalo news restaurant critic) had just shown up, unexpected.

So I'm curious to see her review, but I thought it was great, and would certainly recommend it.

[I did look at their menu online though, and it is FULL of typos, which is a major pet peeve.]

Sometimes I can't believe the emails my dad sends me...

What a weird night... I'm kind of wondering if I was somehow drugged or something. (but I don't actually believe I was.)

I was on call friday night, which was blessedly quiet for the first time in about a month. hallelelujah.

In the morning I met my friend for breakfast... and she told me a story about her night. Her (now-ex) boyfriend called her SIXTY-FOUR times, over the course of 3 hours. And left her 19 voicemails. You could tell he wasn't getting the response he wanted, so he was mixing up his technique. Alternating between "I love you I miss you please call me back" and "ok you are a cunt, get the dicks out of your mouth and call me back." Yeah.... that's the right way to win her back. Then while I was listening to his messages, he called eleven more times.
Point: guys are psycho too.

And then somehow I think there was a time warp from about 11am til 7pm. I seriously don't know where that time went, but I did none of the things I was supposed to. I didn't know what I was going to do that night since I had never made plans. A friend was maybe going to come to town, but at the last minute she couldn't. I was maybe going to go to some yacht club thing, but didn't hear back about that. Then the friend that blew me off last week texted me to try to make up, and said that if I'm ready to forgive him, he had an idea for something super-fun.

"Flash Party" at Essex. I guess there's sort of an art co-op behind the essex st pub. I never knew that. But they were having some benefit last night. So I went. It was $40, but it was open bar, a band (complete with go-go dancers! for real!), and supposedly catered food. Though the catered food ended up being chips and salsa, oreos, pretzels, and peanut butter.

But I had two glasses of wine, and 2 beers. Which I guess is a decent amount to drink, but over 4+ hours it's not insane....

And I was SO DRUNK. I don't know what happened. It didn't hit me until about 2 am when we were at Towne, when I realized I could not eat, and all of the sudden HAD to be in bed, RIGHT THAT SECOND.

So I got home and went to bed, and couldn't get out of bed til 1 today.

Seriously, wtf! I mean I know my tolerance isn't what it used to be, and 4 drinks isn't nothing, but MAN!

So, now I need to try to get everything done that I was supposed to yesterday and today. Bleh....

Ok, so I was late for work AGAIN yesterday, because my car battery was dead AGAIN, because I left my lights on AGAIN. I'm not sure what my problem is.
But after a $10 cab ride to work, I'm a little paranoid, and so I just bought jumper cables that I can keep in my CAR, since they don't do me much good in my garage, AND I bought this battery pack car starter thing- supposedly it fits in the glove box. We'll see. But now I have more peace of mind.



I went to see a friend-of-a-friend's band at Mohawk the other night... I think I need to get out to see more music. But before the band came on they were playing sufjan stevens... I forgot how much I like him. So I put him on itunes, and some of his christmas stuff came on... And I hate to say this, but it almost got me feeling christmas-y. [check out my new user song. Sufjan Stevens doing "O come O come Emmanuel"] That, combined with the white chocolate peppermint lattes (in red cups, of course) that they're serving at work now. So now I'm jammin' to sufjan again, drinking hot cider, and (nearly) enjoying the chill in the air... I guess I am coming to terms with the fact that summer is REALLY over.

And today I chopped my hair some more... It's pretty short. Can barely get it in a pony tail anymore. But while I was there my haircutter lady/girl crush told me about THIS-




It's the Bikram Yoga place on elmwood.... burned down at about 3am this morning. Yikes! I had to go by to check it out... lots of gawkers. It's a pretty stone building... I wonder if it's rebuild-able...

Oh, and I found out that another friend-of-a-friend met someone through match.com- that supposedly I work with. Now i'm dying to know who it is!

Ok, so jason's post about paying for drinks reminded me of something.
My neighbor/best friend growing up lives in NYC now, and works for some big firm. And we've sort of lost touch. But sometimes I see her if I'm home for holidays. And at thanksgiving a couple years ago, I kept catching the end of conversations... things about book deals, being asked to pose for playboy, almost losing her job... Clearly there was some big story I had missed, and this was the aftermath. So I finally asked, and she said to look her up on snopes. So here we go-


(and snopes calls this 'undetermined, but- it's true.)

Basically, she met a guy. He emailed her, inviting her out. She forwarded the email to her friend, to see if she wanted to go too.
But in fact, she hit "reply" not "forward", and sent the message, intended for her friend, back to him. It's the kind of thing that is so easy to do, but it just makes me cringe.

Well, he forwarded it to everyone he knew. And apparently within a matter of hours she was getting emails from china, australia.... ranging from "you gold-digging bitch I hope you die alone" to "hey baby, *I* won't fall asleep!". And supposedly playboy contacted her. Here's her message-

"Ok first- here is the email I received from T, the new guy I met last week. If you want to go out, perhaps we can get him to pay for drinks at Park. Since we have not slept together, he will of course be trying to impress me and will, therefore, do anything I ask. Unlike John, who fell asleep during sex last night. i went over to his place last night around 11:30. We started having sex. When I noticed his eyes were closed for a little too long, I said "John wake up." At which point, he shot up saying "what'd I miss." Yes, I think that is a new low."

And the reason Jason's message made me think of this, was the 'we have not slept together yet, so he will do anything I ask' part. I mean really, is this how girls think??!!

So, I'm really sick of the cialis/etc spam emails that I get all day. Most of them get filtered as spam, but a few make it through. And there was one today, that just wouldn't delete. I don't know why, but it wouldn't go away. So I finally had to open it, and it had this lovely porn-spam-poem:

That's great you've got a gal that's hot
You wanna nail her juicy twat.
She's cute and taking, she's so nice!
But would your penile size suffice?
Not sure she will yearn for more?
You need a thing she would adore!
But how to get it long and thick?
Your only hope is MegaDik!
You'll get so wanted super-size
And see wild craving in her eyes!
Your shaft will pound her poon so deep,
Tonight you'll hardly fall asleep!

So try today this magic pill
And change your life at your own will!

Nice, huh??

And then, this one from my dad. Very politically incorrect and culturally insensitive and potentially offensive blah blah blah- but it made me laugh:

WIN 2 AIRLINE TICKETS ALL EXPENSES PAID TO THE 2008 OLYMPIC GAMES IN
PEKING , CHINA .

To participate is very easy, just view the attached photo, correctly
Answer the following questions and send your answers to the
International Olympic Committee:

1. Which student seems to appear tired / sleepy?
2. Which ones are male twins?
3. Which ones are the female twins?
4. How many women are in the group?
5. Which one is the teacher?

Hmm, I'm suddenly talkative again. (I know why- because I don't want to go deal with the ER.)

So, this isn't quite the story (e:imk2) wants me to tell, but (I think) it's funny nonetheless.

So... I met a guy last year at St. Patrick's Day. He was super cute and charming and witty blah blah blah. We had a great chat, I thought we hit it off, I was pretty psyched. Then all of the sudden he up and disappeared, without asking for my number or anything. Bummer. But my friend said "oh don't worry, he's alway out, we'll run into him again." But she also warned he that he's quite the player, and not to fall for him.

Well, months went by, I never saw him, and I kind of forgot again.
But then we ran into him again. And he's very hot and cold. First I was hurt b/c he totally ignored me. But then all of the sudden it was 2 days of steamy texts. Then more ignoring. Who knows. And I kept remembering her warning not to get invested, b/c yes he's cute and charming and all that- but he's slept with half of buffalo and isn't about to stop.

So, one night I was talking to my girlfriend, and I said I had finally accepted that he is fun, but not to expect any more from him than that. He's a blast to be around, he flirts with me and makes me feel pretty, blah blah.

And she replied "yeah... totally. He's like M [another fun, non-dateable, friend of ours], only better looking, with a better personality, a better job, and better breeding. Basically he's M 2.0!! You should upgrade!"

So now I refer to these two guys as 1.0 and 2.0.

haha. (ok, I thought it was funny...)


And a totally random aside, just to go along with all the political ranting...

So my mom was telling me yesterday that in my hometown, our trash collection was not free. It was not provided by the city. I guess you either could have a pass to the dump (for free) or you could pay for trash collection. But I guess trash collection to the low-income housing was free, or something like that.

Well apparently in their infinite wisdom, the town has decided to close the dump or something. And thus I guess that *have* to provide some sort of free trash pickup. My parents are like "sweet, don't have to pay for trash pickup anymore." And over the last few weeks, they delivered two of those nice big plastic garbage cans with wheels (like the ones we have here) to every house. Which I'm sure cost the city a pretty penny.

So, how are they going to recoup these losses??

They have decided that they will only pick up your trash from your fancy new trash cans if it is in a fancy new trash BAG. Otherwise they will just leave it there. The catch- the bags are $3 apiece. Which for my parents, still ends up being cheaper than trash collection used to be. But for the people who had it for free, now it costs them money and they're all up in arms. And the town also doesn't want to have to pay garbage men (besides the driver) so they are instructing people to line their garbage cans up JUST SO on the street, so that the truck can just pick them up, without needing the extra guy to help line them up.

Is it just me, or is this about the worst plan ever??

Well, ok... here's a story that's not about boy drama.

This is an example of my typical luck.

So last year for christmas I wanted a remote starter for my car. But was told that it's not possible for a stick. Then found out later that it is.

So the other day I revisited that idea. Talked to a friend, who said he can get me a deal, have their top guy do it, blah blah.
So, I made my appointment. 11am yesterday. Was told it would be two hours.ish. So I figured I'd hang out and wait and study and check out fancy tvs and drink coffee etc.
Long ridiculous story "short"- at 6:30 pm, when I've been up since 5am the PREVIOUS day, they told me "well, it's installed, and everything is working except the auto-start."
(um, ok, so what exactly IS working???)
Then they went on about how my car is like a BMW (yes, I know that, didn't you?) and how they don't usually do BMW's b/c they're too hard [apparently their security is very good, and it's very difficult to start a BMW without the key. Go german engineering!] [==> new user song: German Engineering, by Maritime. It's awesome. Check it out.], BUT since I know K they did, blah blah. Sounds like it was quite the headache, and a lot more work than they'd bargained for. So they have to order a part, and i have to go BACK for more installation next week. In the meantime, it works- IF you leave a key in the ignition. [Thanks K- 'preciate it. (and I'm not being sarcastic)].

Which is a bad idea, but of course I had to try it out.

So last night.... well more long stories short, I got stood up by a friend, and I fell asleep on the couch waiting for him. (yeah, you "really want to catch up", my ass). So I woke up around 230, and went to bed. (realized in the am that what might have woken me up was a text I got at 230 am... "can I please come over?" from a VERY HOT acquaintance that has been ignoring me lately. Odd. But answer- no. You do not get to ignore me for a week and then booty-text at 230 am.)
So, I went to bed. Was supposed to be AT WORK at 6.
Well, I slept a bit, and woke up... opened my eyes, looked at the clock, 6:07. I had forgotten to turn on my alarm clock. FUCK. So I flew to work.
Got there, and since it was almost 630, the parking lot was just about full. (well, just about HALF-full, but the fucking union makes them keep about half the lot roped off til nine, for the people that start at 9.)
So I pulled my latest trick and parked in a handicapped spot.
Yes, yes, I know that's wrong.
BUT, there are about 15 handicapped spots. And the kicker- there IS NO HANDICAPPED ENTRANCE anywhere REMOTELY nearby. So I boycott those spots on principle. I park in them often, and have not had a problem. Besides, if you DO get a ticket, it's like a "please don't do that again" post-it from hospital security.

So I go to work. Am finally ready to come home. Figure I'll try the starter. So I push the button. Go out to my car, it is not running. Well, maybe I was too far away. Oh well. Get in the car to start it.
It does not start.
Dead battery.

GOD DAMMIT!

I left the headlights on.

Often if you leave your lights on, some good samaritan notices, and they make an announcement overheard. I have to assume that's what happened. My inappropriate headlights drew attention to my car- and to my inappropriate parking space.

So I got a ticket.

And not a hospital ticket. A ticket from Buffalo's finest, for $100. $100!!!! Guess that will teach me to leave the 'handicapped' spaces for the people who are able bodied enough to walk up stairs, but handicapped enough to get a pass (i.e. fat/lazy.)

And the story doesn't end there, oh no, dear readers.

But I will abbreviate.

I needed a jump. One woman lent me cables, but wouldn't let me jump off her battery. So my friend, who had no cables, pulled his truck around. Only to find that the damage incurred when he hit a deer 3 mo ago has made it impossible to open his hood.

i mean really! Could things be any more ridiculous?!

Dr. Farkle goes to work...

So. That's my non-boy story. Now you probably all wish I'd stick to boys. ;)