Google Launches 'The Google' For Older Adults
SEPTEMBER 26, 2007 | ISSUE 43>39

MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA-The popular search engine Google announced plans Friday to launch a new site, TheGoogle.com, to appeal to older adults not able to navigate the original website's single text field and two clearly marked buttons.

"The Google will have all the same information currently found on regular Google, but with the added features of not stealing your credit-card numbers or giving your computer all kinds of viruses," said Rick Tillich, The Google project director. "All you have to do to turn the website on is put the little blinking line thing in the cyberspace window at the top of the screen, type 'thegoogle.com,' and press 'return'-although it will also recognize http.wwwthegoogle.com, google.aol, and 'THEGOOGLE' typed into a Word document."

Tillich added that he hopes the site will soon replace Yahoo Internet Website.com as the most popular search engine for users over 55.

And another favorite-
Fucking Yankees, Reports Nation

Ok, so I'm in a bit of estrip withdrawal, since I basically haven't been online at all since friday.

AND, my email went down.
Didn't get any messages friday. Didn't get any messages saturday. Started to think "this is weird... usually I at least get some spam..."
Sent myself a test message- it didn't come through.
Sent the email server people a message...
Sunday got a couple messages dated friday...
Finally heard back from the email people "yeah, you're right, you weren't getting your mail. It's fixed now."
I asked "what about all the mail I didn't get?"
Their unsettling reply 'sorry, no way to get that back. The senders should have gotten bounce messages though'. Like that helps.

But to my point...

Now that my mom is gone, I can get back online, and play with the geek toy she brought me-

A heavily hacked/modified A ppleTV- courtesy of my dad and my computer genius friend at home.

Now A-TV is SUPPOSED to just play movies you own. And not ANY movie you own- just what you've bought from the itunes store. Which makes it of limited utility, as far as I'm concerned.

Well, someone figured a way around that- so it's now hooked to a 500gb drive, that contains 300+ full length movies.
All of the james bond movies, all of the harry potter movies... a bunch of HD stuff... and tons more I haven't even looked at yet. And I can add anything I want, more or less.

This is pretty sweet.

Ok... so I went out last night (with the intentions of coming home early to clean my house since my mom is coming to day. Hmph. That only sort of happened.)

But I saw my Rock Star Boyfriend. A pleasure as always. I got to feel very VIP and hang out 'backstage'. Where another band member (who is married with kids if I'm not mistaken) was drunk and flirting with me, insisting that he knows me from somewhere. I was like 'um, yeah, your shows?' but then he insisted that I'm a bartender and THAT is why he knows me. Haha. I had my hair straight. Must have thrown him off. ;)

But part of the reason I got to be so VIP is b/c I was hanging out with RSB's girlfriend. (We are now like totally BFF b/c she cuts my hair. (which is, incidentally, quite short as of wednesday afternoon. Like barely to my shoulders).) So that means that when we saw her, we got to go 'backstage' and got winked at by the band and all. Now, I have always had a bit of a harmless crush on this guy. I mean, he's just so damn cool! and he's like REALLY a rockstar! So I would sort of expect to hate his girlfriend (out of jealousy)...

But... instead I realized last night, that if I were to have a crush on a girl, it would be on her. Or someone like her. She's just so damn CUTE! And she has lots of super cool tattoos, including one of an Alexander Calder mobile on the inside of her upper arm. She looks like a little pixie. And, she has great (though I suspect fake) boobs. Which she managed to flash to the entire (crazily huge!) crowd last night- since when she gave me a hug her top totally fell down.

I think really I just wish I could be that cool and stylish and ride a vespa and dare to have crazy tattoos and a funky haircut and wild makeup and wear sexy little tube tops that I made myself my from my boyfriend's band's tshirts... Not to mention HAVE a boyfriend in a band with tshirts that can be used to make clothes.

Anyway, it was fun. then to the 'after party'. The dropkicks were invited. Not sure if they ever made it, since I left early-ish to go home and mom-proof the house. But that would have been pretty cool if they showed.

Today sucks at work. Boooo. I want to go home!
Looking forward to seeing my mama. All she wants to do is eat at good restaurants, and buy me stuff. (she is horrified by my rickety coffee table that I have to re-glue about once a week.) haha! i'm not complaining....

Superbad is so funny I have a headache from laughing.

Seriously. Everyone go see it. I command you.

p.s. i really miss Arrested Development. RIP, Best Show Ever.

How strangely awesome is Shatner?!


That is all.

[I was going to update my user sound, but it's not an mp3 so I can't.]

So...
I went to get my mail this afternoon, and I had a package!!!
How exciting!
It was from my friend, whose wedding I was in back in July.
She sent me a cute glittery thank you note, and a framed picture. And then another unframed one (which got all glittery from the card) since she couldn't decide.
In any case, they're pix of me that I don't hate, so I'm posting them! So there! Glitter and all. (and since I don't have a scanner, they're pix of pix, so there are stupid flash reflections.)

Oh, what a shitty day at work. I am about to kill a co-worker. I will leave it at that.

But I just remembered something I meant to post. And some other random crap.

• Kibarashi is closing?! This weekend I noticed a big orange "SEIZED" sign in the window- apparently they didn't pay their taxes?! Yowza...

• I was supposed to go to dinner at the Chop House tonight. But I had to miss it. BOOO!

• As I walked in to work this AM, it hit me: summer is over. Fall is in the air. Just like that. Sad, sad day.

• formication |ˌfôrmiˈkā sh ən|

noun
a sensation like insects crawling over the skin.

This is a great word, in part because it sounds dirty. And it describes how I feel right now. On the way home from work, I suddenly noticed a spider running around my dashboard. And then, it ran out of my view. And it was really dark, so I couldn't tell where it went. Until all of the sudden in the glare of the headlights, I saw it was on the steering wheel. And then I lost it again. I am not especially scared of spiders- but I still don't like NOT knowing where it is, and now keep thinking I feel it crawling all over me. YUCK.

Oh yeah, and formication is a well-described and fairly common symptom/side effect of cocaine .

So, I did, after all end up going back to Betty's on Sunday for brunch.

And this time we were seated almost immediately, at a 'normal' table. I even had the same waitress as the day before, and she was cute and attentive and the service was fast and great. I had eggs benedict, which was pretty good. (I love eggs benedict, but unfortunately I don't think most places do it very well- the hollandaise (which makes or breaks the dish) is usally too blah. This was decent, but could stand even more lemon, in my book.) The homefries were yummy. I wish the OJ was fresh-squeezed, but oh well.

So the stories I had heard had made it sound like Betty's brunch was simply OUT OF THIS WORLD. I thought it was decent, but not AMAZING.

But much better than the day before. So maybe they just had a bad day. I would still go back.

[I also tried the peach 'jet tea' from spot- Yummmm!! And while there, unintentionally recruited my favorite Spottie to my (ex) rescue. Woohoo.]

Ok, so I finally decided to check out Betty's, after all the hype I've been hearing lately.

So I got there... there were about a million people waiting outside. But it turns out they were just one big party, and there weren't that many other people waiting. While waiting, I overheard one waitress say that the "bee situation" outside was getting out of control. So when I asked to be seated, and she said "let me see what we've got outside" I wasn't too thrilled. But then she noticed this funny little afterthought of a table crammed in the corner of the little "front lobby" room, and put me there.

Oh, and I must mention- the whole reason I wanted to go to Betty's is b/c I was craving brunch. In the car I was debating... 'hmm... french toast? eggs benedict? omelet?' I love breakfast food. I was really excited.

So, she sits me at my funny table, which is sopping wet b/c they wiped with a really wet rag first. eh, whatever. Then it takes forever for a waitress to come over. But I could hear the hostess and waitresses talking about how CRAZY busy it was and they've never seen a saturday like this. So I didn't really mind, just sat and read the artvoice**.

finally a frazzled looking waitress comes over, and throws a menu and a specials list at me (a crumpled torn photocopy... I guess that's easier than memorizing/reciting?) and leaves before taking a drink or anything.

I pick up the menu, thinking 'hmm, do I have fresh squeezed OJ AND coffee AND water?' Yum yum, so excited, did I mention I love brunch?

Oh, I forgot to mention, it was about 1:30.

I look at the menu, and almost cried-
Brunch is only on sundays!!!
And breakfast on saturday is only til 12:30.
DAMMIT!!!

So, the waitress came back, and I ordered lemonade. And water.

She brought lemonade. No water.

I ordered a cajun chicken salad wrap.

Then I waited and waited and waited. Read the artvoice. Finished my lemonade in about two minutes, and then had no water. And no food.

Just when I thought they'd forgotten me, my food came out. She really kind of threw it on the table- it actually made a loud noise when the plate hit the table, and then scurried off, never to be seen again.

But- it was tasty. i can't complain about my sandwich.

I did finally have to yell across the room to the hostess for some water, though, when I got sick of waiting for the obligatory 'how is everything' check-up from the waitress- which she poured in my empty lemonade glass.

After I finished my sandwich, I sat there with the empty plate in front of me for quite a while. And then I noticed desserts on the menu, specifically key lime pie. And I thought that maybe to make up for my disappointment in not having brunch, I'd treat myself to dessert.

But then the waitress came back and gave me my check. No dessert for me, I guess.

I am really not one to complain about service. Being a waitress is kind of thankless job.

And it wasn't her fault that I wanted brunch, so it wouldn't be fair to take it out on her.

That said, the service was lackluster. But, the food WAS tasty. So even though I thought otherwise, I tipped nicely. And I think I'd go back.

Maybe tomorrow.
For brunch. ;)

• so.... am I reading this right? This is from news of the weird in Artvoice...

Until a July Florida appeals court ruling, Mark O'Hara, 45, had been in prison for two years of a 25-year mandatory-minimum for trafficking in hydrocodone, based solely on the 58 tablets found in his possession in 2004, even though his supply had been lawfully prescribed by a physician. The state attorney in Tampa had pointed out that Florida law did not mention a "prescription" defense to trafficking, and even though O'Hara had lined up a doctor and a pharmacist to testify, the jury wasn't allowed to consider the issue. After the appeals court called the case "absurd" and ordered a new trial with the prescription evidence allowed, the state attorney still refused to drop the case.

I'm really NOT in favor of frivolous lawsuits, but did this guy really serve two years in jail for having legally prescribed Lortab?!
How did this happen???!!!!!

Ok, so I think this story is as good as, if not better than, the karma story...

So...
Last week at work I saw this patient in the clinic... A really sweet woman who had had a mastectomy and breast reconstruction a few years back, and came in for a follow up. She was doing great, and didn't have any problems. I asked her who her surgeon was, so that I could set up the right follow-up appointment with her. And she said "well actually, I didn't have my surgery here- I had it when I was still stationed in Rhode Island." I said "oh really? I'm from Rhode Island, what a small world." Then just to make conversation, I said "did you have your surgery at the naval hospital?" And she replied "well, no. My naval surgeon did the mastectomy, but the reconstruction was done by a local guy, at Newport hospital." At this point my interest was piqued, and I asked "who was that?" but she couldn't think of his name. I showed her my ID, and said "he didn't have this last name by any chance, did he?" And she said "YES! Oh my goodness! That's it!"

She was my dad's patient!!!

And even better than that, she then went on and on about what an amazing guy he is and how he did such a great job. And she said 'and you know, he told me he had a daughter going into surgery! He said he thinks you're crazy for doing, but that he's really proud of you."

Aww... it just made my day.

Number two:
Here is a very unfunny lame Planet Unicorn ripoff-
BOOO!



and finally-

Happy Birthday Timika!!