Musings Part 2

e:sqb and @hodown - there is a problem in the situation. I found out she has a man already. Anyway maybe it's just stupid to think that anything would happen. She has em lined up already. The thing is that I do feel bad that I haven't called - I don't want her to think I'm an asshole but at the same time I know I can't be her friend because I dig her - last year I learned a lesson when someone asked me why I was so distant from them - I confessed to her that I couldn't be friends with someone that I wanted to be with so badly. So I lost a friend - don't want that to happen again either. I don't even know why I'm thinking about this crap. I'm a guy. Maybe my horniness is clouding my thinking. I'll probably call the girl anyway and hope she doesn't answer, so that way I'm not an asshole and at the same time I don't have to actually follow through with hanging out with her. I hope that doesn't sound bad but it's the truth.