"f#*k%£g monkey" written by Zobar on estrip.org

Category: a series of tubes

08/06/08 10:57 - 72ºF - ID#45250

f#*k%£g monkey

Adobe AIR is an impressive* new technology that the BBC has used to produce a swearing Olympics monkey.

Although they've since updated the application, the list of swear words has [of course] been archived online elsewhere

. George Carlin eat your heart out, they've got 1,400 listed here.

- Z

_______________

I wrote the scoreboard/advertising/multimedia controller for the QCRGs using the AIR beta, and that's some dang heavy lifting. So far commercially it seems to mostly be used for the kind of application that Marketing thinks would be great but which ends up taking up way too much desktop real estate and provides too little functionality for the amount of advertising it spews for anybody to actually use it,** which is a real bummer.
Guilty as charged. But I only did*** the Mac version and I used Objective-C, which at least excuses it from this conversation. Don't bother looking for it though, it only works in Baltimore.
I will make it up to the Internet, I promise. More later, maybe.

Permalink: f_k_g_monkey.html
Words: 181
Location: Buffalo, NY

Category: food

08/04/08 04:36 - 79ºF - ID#45240

hey everybody!

Rice Krispie Treats!

Also: successfully nailing Jell-O to a wall.*

Conclusion: There is still good in this world.

- Z

_______________

Spoiler: Ramen noodles.

Permalink: hey_everybody_.html
Words: 31
Location: Buffalo, NY

Category: misc

08/01/08 04:28 - 78ºF - ID#45219

random acts of randomness

The suburbs are boring and humorless. So when you see something like this on your street you know that's a special thing.

- Z

_______________
I am blogging a lot lately because B is out of town and Chita Rivera doesn't like my jokes.

Permalink: random_acts_of_randomness.html
Words: 45
Location: Buffalo, NY

Category: neighbors

07/31/08 10:28 - 73ºF - ID#45203

gripe gripe gripe

I have a lovely sunporch off the back of my house, with big screened windows all around and an aluminum roof that goes pok pok pok in the rain. We have a table and a couple relatively comfortable chairs out here, a minifridge stocked with beer and lemonade, and we'll usually move the couch out here for the summer. Now that I work from home, this is my office too. This right here is what summer is about.

I live in a section of town where the houses and yards are very small. I do not see this as a problem. I have neighbors who I think secretly or publicly hate me, but oddly enough I don't see this as a problem either. One of my passive aggressive neighbors has a stinky orange cat who likes to kill rabbits and pick fights, and while I do see this as a problem with teeth and claws, it is also a problem small enough that it is easily tossed over the nearest fence.

Here is my problem: Central air conditioning. Both of my next door neighbors and my back yard neighbor have central air conditioning for their homes, which are just as tiny as mine. It is 75 degrees outside and all three air conditioners are running. [Energy crisis what?] It's the kind of loud where you don't really realize how loud it is until that rare thirty seconds where all three thermostats are synced up and all three homes are exactly the right temperature AND WHEN THE LAST ONE SHUTS OFF YOU CAN FINALLY HEAR THE CRICKETS OH SORRY I DIDN'T... I didn't realize I was yelling. That's what it feels like, anyway.

- Z

metalpeter writes at 06:51:22 08/01/08 - Comment #37598: I don't have central air, but I do have one Window AC unit. I used to not but a fan just doesn't do it. I'm upstairs and it can get pretty hot up there. I sweat all day at work and I don't want to do it when I'm at home trying to relax. However if I was the kind that had lots of lady company then the AC would be in the back bedroom and the heat would be a great excuse to get naked then take an icy shower and then since it is hot she would just leave after that,HA. The thing to remember is that everyones house with out heat or AC will have a natural temp and that is what really determines what you need to be comfy and like (e:tiny) she likes it hot and again people's bodies are used to different things so again that is a factor. I think for most people all they should need is a really good ceiling fan.

tiburon1724 writes at 05:55:31 08/01/08 - Comment #37593: I would not buy a house without central air. Even in Buffalo. There are many days it's necessary to be comfortable, something I have a right to in my own home. It's not as bad downstairs, but upstairs is just too hot a lot of times, and really uncomfortable to sleep in, even with a fan on, without a/c.

janelle writes at 08:39:47 08/01/08 - Comment #37570: Like Drew said, I am absolutely amazed that people in Buffalo act like air conditioning is a necessity. We open up our windows, use a fan, and the house is surprisingly cool.

drew writes at 08:21:10 08/01/08 - Comment #37568: Another pastor was visiting my church, and was shocked that we don't have A/C (except in the office to keep the copier working).

Buffalo is not hot enough to justify A/C. Fans work just fine.

tinypliny writes at 12:42:59 08/01/08 - Comment #37561: I think they should just install hidden sensors for the AC units that makes them wail like crazy and wake the dead if they are operated at anything below 90 degrees. Suck up a little heat, will you? (I know, I am not really the person who is qualified to make such brutal statements, considering I am at my best at around 120 Deg F, but everyone's got a right to gripe. I hate ACs in the summer).

paul writes at 12:24:38 08/01/08 - Comment #37558: Its not my direct next door neighbor but on the way home from the gym, across from Fugazi there is this rich lady society club that has had a SUV sized diesel generator on for about 2 months. I suspect it is powering some sort of air conditioning system. It seems like such a huge waste of energy as it is on 24/7. Whatever, electricity crisis they are having, I don't see why they can;t solve it in some sort of non diesel way.

They should make laws about silencing equipment.

james writes at 11:48:26 07/31/08 - Comment #37557: What is worse? Air pollution from unnecessarily running your air conditioning or the noise pollution?

Permalink: gripe_gripe_gripe.html
Words: 283
Location: Buffalo, NY

Category: a series of tubes

07/30/08 06:31 - 77ºF - ID#45194

cuilstalking

So I guess there was like this huge hype about a new search engine named Cuil? except the comment threads of the news sites are telling me it's pretty awful.

When I Google myself it's mostly me, and stupid questions I've posted on [usually technical] mailing lists about compiling shit, or whatever. A few years ago there was another David Kleinschmidt who - well, I can't imagine him not being extremely gay in a very stereotypical manner [seriously: a singer with Oberlin's Gilbert & Sullivan society?]

But when I Cuiled myself -holy shit! What the Hell does this even mean? It's like they took Safe Search, and made the opposite of that.

Who's Grandma Flyer? Why are there goofballs in my home and garden? What is a Flyer Monkey?? Whose ass crack is that?! What does "FIST CITY BLUE & FISH" even mean?!?

Jeesh. First Google lists me as a GNUstep user, and now this. How embarrassing.

- Z

_______________
btw: RIP Ted Stevens' career. The man authored the Alaska Statehood Act, for Chrissakes. I guess he'll have plenty of time on his hands to figure out Outlook Express.

Permalink: cuilstalking.html
Words: 190
Location: Buffalo, NY

Category: food

07/26/08 02:37 - 80ºF - ID#45151

separated at birth?

I admit it doesn't make a whole lot of sense. I've just always thought bacon looked like Norway.

- Z

Permalink: separated_at_birth_.html
Words: 22
Location: Buffalo, NY

Category: food

07/24/08 02:50 - 66ºF - ID#45125

thinspiration

So suddenly I'm a poster-boy for size acceptance, go figure! A reporter from the Buffalo News discovered (e:dragonlady7,43746) where she goes on about size acceptance, which he is writing about but couldn't find any local experts. He came over to do an interview with B while I was working in the next room over. The topic of me came up, and he was kind of like har har he's so skinny. And I was like, dude: it would be extremely rude if somebody came up to you and said 'you're so fat, here have some carrot sticks.' But when somebody comes up to me and says 'you're so skinny, here have a milkshake,' it's totally acceptable! [For the record: it's not original and you're not clever.]

'Size acceptance' is not the same thing as saying 'So what if I'm fat?' Size acceptance is recognizing that it is possible to be healthy even if your weight is not within one standard deviation of the statistical mean. If your body is healthy and your mind is sane, is not worth risking your physical health with an asinine diet; your mental health by obsessing about every calorie; or your happiness with awful food. Not all fat people are overeaters, and not all skinny people are bulimic.

I'm sure he thinks I'm just playing the devil's advocate [and to some extent perhaps I am] but it doesn't make it any less true. Regardless, they're doing up some portraits of the two of us to put in the paper.

Edited to add:

- Z

tinypliny writes at 10:13:44 07/24/08 - Comment #37376: I am kind of torn about that video. Its all nice and empowering to assert that you like food, and you will eat as much as you want and not care about the consequences etc. I think the sentiment is great if you eat wisely. If you don't eat wisely and just eat as a kind of hobby, see your health (and mental status) get worse, then I think its time to take your head out of the sand and eat with moderation and consciousness.

Not all fat people are overeaters. But, as of today, in this country and abroad, most of them are. Most of them don't follow the four rules in (e:dragonlady)'s post. You could argue that some of them have bad diets because it is expensive to eat well. But energy balance is a personal choice. You cannot possibly say that it is expensive to eat in moderation and stop when you are hungry. Because you made a conscious decision to go with that triple butter-cheese-triple-meat burger when a smaller serving/healthier choice that could have sufficed was available for the same price.

janelle writes at 04:12:26 07/24/08 - Comment #37358: When I was a lot skinnier, I got a lot of comments from people about being too skinny as though I was anorexic or bulimic. Very annoying.

Every time I picked up a diet soda or said I was going out for a run, I got those nasty comments. I didn't have time to explain to every person that I drank diet to protect my teeth from cavities and I run for good health. The skinniest person is not naturally the healthiest person.

I got the comments just the other day when I went out to lunch for work and got a salad instead of a heaping plate of spaghetti smothered in cheese that I didn't really want to eat before going back to work. But I'm totally going back some time to get it!

I think the bottom line issue is why people feel they have an innate right to comment on individual choices.

Permalink: thinspiration.html
Words: 264
Location: Buffalo, NY

Category: misc

07/21/08 09:26 - 73ºF - ID#45094

these things are made out of meat!

Before I'd even woken up this morning the most adorable cat in the world had killed her first sparrow and was tossing it around the backyard like a feathery beachball. We shut her out of the house so she wouldn't bring it in. After about fifteen minutes of this we started wondering how to explain 'you break it you bought it' to a kitten. After she'd pulled all the feathers off she discovered out on her own that they were full of meat and devoured everything except the head, which she left rolling around on the driveway. Circle of life and all that crap.

Spent three days on retreat with (e:dragonlady7)'s parents in Darkest Schaghticoke. It was very restorative. As always, I had some surreal conversations with her dad, who is cool, but a different kind of cool: 'So your car has a continuously-variable transmission.' 'Yup.' 'I don't know how that works.' 'Neither do I.' Then, an hour of talking in circles, including visual aids from a Vietnam-era military manual which, oddly enough, doesn't make anything clearer. Then: cheesecake!

- Z

Permalink: these_things_are_made_out_of_meat_.html
Words: 187
Location: Buffalo, NY

Category: cats

07/15/08 08:57 - 65ºF - ID#45024

for e:paul

- pictures for sad children

- Z

Permalink: for_e_paul.html
Words: 12
Location: Buffalo, NY

Category: work

07/13/08 11:05 - 68ºF - ID#44998

i hate brussels sprouts too

- tinfoilraccoon @ flickr

Just for the record, I worked 64hr in five days last week. Those of you who are not suitably impressed should keep in mind that I am a total slacker and one of the reasons I work from home is so that I can generally get away with working about half that. I don't live to work, I work to live.

The office manager [who can never seem to remember to pay me] asked why I don't work full-time at the office instead. Among other things, I said, when you work 'part-time' you get paid hourly. [It seemed unprofessional to say that I do better work with a kitty on my lap and bangin' tunes on the stereo.]

So when I totalled up my invoice [and it was a lot of money - it would have taken me a month to make that much at my old job] I looked at it and (e:dragonlady7) looked at it and she said Hm! and I said yeah, that's nice but I think I would rather have eaten and slept instead.

The good news is I think I'm done.

--

The problem with working for such a large client is their ubiquity. I went with (e:dragonlady7) to the Century to forget about life for an hour or two. But while we're eating our wings a baseball game comes on and my client had bought all of the advertising space in both dugouts. Another guy on the project went to Las Vegas last week and one of the first things he saw was an enormous billboard advertising their products.

But my boss has the worst story: so he's on vacation in the country - no cell phone reception, no internet access, no buildings even. He's walking through the woods and he sees one of their products on the ground. He's like no, you're kidding me. Picks it up and sees the logo. KHAAANNN!!!

- Z