So on our main computer we suddenly have this problem where when we go to google or yahoo the whole site is different looking and whatever search results show up are actually fake advertisements or whathave you. we have run spybot and some other shit and can't get it to go away...
anyone have any suggestions? im clueless and felly, although somewhat less clueless can't fix it either. grumble grumble. danke.

well, its back again. its amazing how something so simple as sitting in a classroom can light a fire under my ass everytime. my mind is already going into overdrive...and sometimes its very frustrating because the truth be told, i don't think in real world terms when i get going like this. i am a highly theoretical person and despite my generally negative attitude toward stuck up academics who can't talk like real human beings, i am equally at fault. i have been doing a lot of thinking about this major issue must be included into my thesis...somehow.

anyways, this is basically a warning post. i have already been doing a little commenting here and there and might i just say to not take them as attacks, just thought provokers or critiques or what have you. friendly intelligent conversation if you will. also, you all know how i love to procrastinate :)

i can't believe its that time already. lucky for me i don't have class today so i can put off this whole back to school thing one more day.. even though secretly i am really excited to be going back. even better is i only have class on t,w, and th which means four day weekends all the time! the scary thing is....this is my last semester of classes. thats it. 4 classes and then i have to write a thesis. my thesis. holy flying shit balls batman. i think it wouldn't be so bad if things weren't so screwed up in my dpt. i won't get into it but needless to say i think the nonsense that is going on goes above and beyond your typical higher ed bullshit which is why i can't wait to get the eff outta here.

i went to the elmwood arts festival on saturday. it was terribly hot and i had aching menstrual cramps, but i am glad i went nonetheless. however, although i certainly probably most likely would not have gone by myself...i think it is necessary to go with folks who you are one hundred percent comfortable with so that you can take your time and stop where you want to stop and not feel the need to press on. honestly, i didn't really look at any actual art. i strolled from one end to the other, got some artichoke hearts smothered in cheese on a pita and a chai tea from spot and went home. not exactly the full experience, but an experience nonetheless. i was sad that felly could not come with me though. boo.

felly and i are going camping next weekend in watkins glen near ithaca. i am terribly excited about this because, despite us saying we were going to go camping all summer, we didn't. we went to plenty of weddings, but no camping. and i think it will be just us and the dog which is nice. I have never been to ithaca, amazingly enough, so it is sure to be a good time...as long as something terrible doesn't happen like it usually does when felly and i try to do something fun together. ha. as long as there are no tornados i will be happy.

oh yes and i will say this. felly has gone crazy with the beer makin. crazy. she is sooo very excited and i am doing my best to be excited as well. don't get me wrong, i think its cool and all and i like beer, but i have a giant 2 gallon keg on top of my fridge and a cooler full of possibly explosive bottles of beer taking up my closet. awesome. i spose when the beer is actually ready i will appreciate all this.

Ok...so by the looks of it, I have to resize my pics before I can upload them cause I got this one to work, which is from left, myself, my younger brother Dan, my mom, my new sister, my big brother and my dad, which was stolen from my cousin and much smaller than my own. So it goes...

My brother's wedding was pretty awesome...beautilful redone barn in the middle of nowhere...the ceremony was outside and then dancing and nonsense inside afterward. I will post pictures but, how do I do it again? I tried yesterday and I think I screwed it up. I am usually not this technologically impaired...estrip manages to confuse me though...

Oh yes and... Felly and I got home from out four hour drive on Sunday and were watching a movie when we here a loud crash outside and then instantly see a cat flying inside of the porch. We go out there and lo and behold, the cat had somehow managed to jump up onto our flower box and knock it to the ground. Most of our flowers were severed or decapitated by the fall and are looking pretty sad. Poor poor flowers. Now, as a result, neither cat is allowed outside although it is only our crazy must eat and destroy everything cat that should be denied access. Had to ruin it for everybody. This is also the cat that recently chewed off the entire green part of our indoor spikey plant that is already sitting on top of 9 books so he can't reach it. So much for that idea. Bastard cat.

Dumm dum duh dummm duh duh dummm...

OK.
So im watching this really fascinating show on the history channel about Star Wars as an epic myth full of symbols and metaphors and all that good stuff and...well, its cool. For example, they are talking about Luke and how he represents the kind of average hero (much like Harry Potter) who has insecurities and normal people stuff and how this figure is present in many more ancient mythological stories. Also very interesting ideas about technology (ie the Death Star( vs. humanity (ie The Force) and the dualism/struggle going on and how this is a modern type myth. Oooo and they just talked about Luke as a Messianic figure who redeems "the father" (Darth vadar) and how Odysseus became his father in order to grow up.

Im into this shit.

I guess part of the reason I like this so much is that I have noticed, as I am sure many of you have also, the increasingly huge trend in these epic, multiple film movies (ie, harry potter, lord of the rings, Batman, etc etc) are HUGE at the box office. Although I don't always think that there are always conscious connections between these modern films to these age old classic myths, I think that it shows a deeper human connection and why we continue to be fascinated by and drawn to these types of stories. heroism. good and evil. love and hate. journeys that require courage and overcoming fears and insecurities. being extraordinary.

what i am thinking is why this sudden surge in pop culture? is it a surge? is it just more accessible now because its on film and not in words? or are we as a culture more lost and seeking that human connection...that feeling that we just don't get from computers and other forms of technology? is it a catch 22 that it is film and media technology bringing these mythic sagas back into our lives? what impact are these films having on us...billions of dollars means something!

sometimes i think about these things...

Ok so, (e:strip) wasn't working for us from our home and then I remembered that sometime ago we had this same prob so I erased the cookies and temp internet files and now it works! yay! anyone know why this is?

ah. so, I have to write something for my brothers wedding. like, to read, at the wedding. i looked and looked for some nontraditional something or another, but Felly made the argument that it would be way more meaningful and personal if i just sucked it up and wrote it and even though im skerred, she's right. so, thats my job for today and tomorrow.

other than that, they have been showing the downstairs apt over and over and over again with no luck. not like i am particularly interested in having a downstairs neighbor, i can't help but want to put in my two cents about why they aren't renting the place. PAINT!!! there is, in my opinion, nothing worse than a cream colored apt and that is all that place down there is (and all ours was when we first moved in). if they just threw up some warm neutrals that place would seem a whole lot nicer and worth the price they are asking. either way i hope somebody cool moves in who maybe smiles every once and awhile and doesn't have a shit fit that our dog runs laps around our living room every now and then.

I don't know if I will be able to fully articulate what it is that i want to say here, but I will do my best.

so there is this guy who lives in the apt. building across the street and really likes ralphie. fine. so he comes over and we chat while ralphie bites him. fine. so of course i talk about "we" all the time and he asks who "we" is and i tell him i have a girlfriend and he sees Felly with Ralphie and blah blah blah. No problems...but yesterday he asked me, in the most polite and not intentionally harmful way possible: so uh, do you have a gf cause you don't like guys or...? and I reply, no, I just fell in love with a woman. he then proceeds to go..ok well, ya know i was just wondering because you are a beautiful woman ya know...

AHHHHHHH!!!

seriously. and of course, i can't ever open my mouth at the proper time so we just move on past that and start talking about the Italian festival or whatever, but shit man...shit. no, not all lesbians are ugly. no, not all lesbians hate men. no, not all lesbians were deeply hurt or rejected by a guy which 'turned' them gay. Fuck. sometimes i want to lie and just say that i have never been with a guy and never want to ever and have no interest in the matter. but that wouldn't be very honest would it...course then again neither is keeping my mouth shut when my insides are churning...

What is perhaps the most frustrating part of this is that I know there is no harm intended. This guy is sincerely a nice guy, but he just doesn't know any better. My problem is I tend to get a little excited and start stuttering and shit when I try to explain my views on these types of things...you should have seen the conversation i had with my little brother about feminism and racism and why i do what i do. ug. and maybe i wouldn't get so damn frustrated if it wasn't for the fact that I HEAR THE SAME SHIT over and over again from people. And yet it never ceases to amaze me. poo.

Ok, i feel a little better now.

My brother is getting married next Saturday. I am so happy and proud of him that he is not doing the traditional "a marriage between a man a woman" bullshit... and my mom is very sad that they aren't getting married by a minister and I am not going to read Corinithians... at the wedding i went to a couple weeks ago it was very much like that and my friend, who i love dearly, kept smiling and looking at me when they would say things like "man and woman". Yes yes, i know. thanks very much. I'm not bitter, I swear, I just get very very tired sometimes....

BUT, I digress...... :)

Yesterday Ralphie got to spend some quality time with some of our neighbors' dogs. Two pitts and a rotweiler, all full grown. Amazingly enough, not only did Ralphie not bark, but he completely submitted and played well and didn't die. I had to back off and not freak out cause my instant instinct is to pick him up and save him from being eaten alive, which obviously didn't happen. Although at one point one of the pitts did get a little too aggresive and i did end up picking up Ralphie, simply because that dog could fit an entire weiner in his mouth and not choke. When i picked him up he was covered in drool and his heart was racing, but I think overall he had a pretty good time. Also, Ralphie can now sit, lay down and roll over, all through the use of hand signals. He is a smarty pants.

I have five full weeks left until school starts up again. Damn. And four out of the next six weekends are booked with two weddings, a BBQ and the Elmwood Arts festival. I kinda like that though.

In other news, our landlord is resealing and putting new lines in our parking lot, which really in the end is a good thing because obviously people have issues with comprehending the importance of proper spacing when parking in a lot without lines, but right now its a pain in the ass. I think (e:fellyconnelly) wrote about this, but our landlords, "esquarecapital" are redoing the old YWCA on north...the giant creepy building with the huge columns going up to the 2nd or 3 rd floor and turning it into senior housing...which i think is great because what the hell else would you do with a building like that? However, the parking lot is still total sketchville...behind Latina's Food Land with no lights. Although I can commend our landlords for giving us another parking option, I politely decline.

OH! I forgot...NEW SEASON OF PROJECT RUNWAY...makes me a happy girl, although the "new time" is kind of a bummer cause we don't get out of dance class till after 9 which means we have to wait to watch it till 11 after Sheer Genius is over. Ah well, so is the life of someone who religiously watches a TV show. Anyway, I think people who tan are silly and I think people who think being orange looks good are confused and need some guidance. And, if you look like an alien and are orange, you might need professional help. That is all.

So, my parents 32 wedding anniversary is today and they decided to take this entire week of for vacation. Somewhere along the way I decided to convince them that they should come to Buffalo to visit me. I have always wanted them to come here but now Felly and I are worrying about things like, we have no AC, will they sleep in our bed? Is that weird? Should we put them on the fold out couch (which ralphie peed on last night)? What the hell am I going to do with them? Its kinda gross today and I think that they have been to the falls before, so thats out. Whose got ideas?

On top of that, I am really really really sick. like winter time sick. This doens't happen to me but I was up all night last night because my throat and lungs are on fire and I am dry coughing and it hurts. Sucky pants. I could complain forever about this. But I won't. Wish me luck.