I need a new job...

Yesterday I was in the ladies room at work.

It's a one person bathroom and since I'm the only girl it is pretty much my own private loo (oh the glamorous life I lead)...

Anyways, I'm minding my own business when all of a sudden I see something scurry under the door out of the corner of my eye.

It was a giant spider!!!! Huge and Black and hairy...... and headed straight towards me....

I was frozen with fear.

Ahhh , I hate spiders!

So, of course I scream, and a couple of the guys come running to the door.

"Jill, are you all right?"

No, I say.... huge spider!!!!

I hear more rustling outside the door,

Now I realize that I am making a scene, and that I need to grow up.

I brace myself for an attack and leap with all my might over the spider, slamming into the door on the other side.

I throw the door open and rush out.

.......Big mistake, oh boy did the guys laugh...... they kicked around the spider for a little while and teased me endlessly....

It's okay though, because I've been told it's dead. (Bloody Right...that'll teach it to mess!)

So since then I have been totally on edge, expecting to find something creepy-crawly and all up in my business.

Today, as I'm leaving the fax machine I spot something creeping by my desk...

It looked like a large black spot, so decided to be a big girl and inspect before I jump to conclusions.

.....I slowly approach the spot......closer and closer....no movement....closer, closer......

Leaps.......it's like a huge black cockroach, and it leaps into the air only inches from my face.....

I scream and jump back....and all the expected nonsense.....

And my coworkers laugh and joke and tease....

And all I can think is how in the heck did a Grasshopper (that was no grasshopper I had ever seen).... get to be right smack dab below my desk?......

Suspicious!!!

I suspect Foul Play......