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janelle’s journal

Divorce and the Holidays

· · 🌡️ 49°F

As many of you have read on this blog, my parents are in the process of divorcing. Yesterday was their first court hearing. Although I haven't heard the outcome, I'm pretty sure that by Thanksgiving or Christmas, the parents will not be sharing the same roof anymore. So I will be transitioning into that weird situation of how to handle the holidays. I think they'll both be living in the same town, so that will help. I'll be in IL with them for Thanksgiving and doing Xmas here in Buffalo. My plan for Xmas is to invite everyone (brother and both parents and grandmother) in the family to celebrate here and let them decide who wants to come.

Any advice from those with experience in juggling divorced parents and holidays?
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💬 6 comments

  1. james ·

    I have no helpful advice, but I hope the situation is as painless as possible for you.

  2. leetee ·

    I don't have any helpful advice, either. I know it's not about you, even if it affects you. Good luck... and keep your chin up. They still love you!

  3. mike ·

    Sorry I've never been in a similar situation but I do think inviting them all here is a good idea. It lets them all decide if they can put aside their differences for the holidays instead of you having to choose in which someone would end up hurt. Good luck! I hope it all goes well!

  4. lauren ·

    I also agree with your idea to bring them to your place for the holiday...that way they both have to travel equally and it is neutral turf for both. Also, having the option to leave whenever they get uncomfortable is good.
    Hopefully they will be able to put their differences aside without too much pretending in order for everyone involved to enjoy family togetherness.

  5. tinypliny ·

    Yep, invite everyone and see who turns up. Sometimes, its just surprising because everyone turns up thinking the other's aren't going to turn up... and then you have shortage of silverware.

  6. janelle ·

    Lol, I can only hope we spend Xmas fighting over who gets to use silverware and who has to eat with their hands. That should make the traditional Xmas Eve clam chowder meal more interesting!

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