1. You ever wonder what it's like to be a sysadmin for an alt weekly? You want to find out? Send me your resume.

2. You ever see those ads on political websites showing the president making a monkey face or Hillary Clinton's eyes popping out of her head, and the ad says: 'Do you approve of the job this person is doing? Vote in our completely neutral and totally legitimate ballot.'

I've never clicked on one, so I don't know if they even register your 'vote.' I'm sort of half-curious about how the voting breaks down for those, but I'd be more interested to know how many people vote on those at all. [And also, academically, how many of the people who vote on those things actually vote with real ballots in November.]

I am not a big fan of Newsvine [I find it far too self-referential to be of any use] but they are running an interesting presidential primary poll. Get websites of varying levels of bias and neutrality, give them a relatively neutral ballot, and see what comes up [sample ballot: ].

What is interesting is not so much how the political sites are biased ['The Mitt Report' is 96% for Romney, imagine that] but how nonpolitical sites can be strongly biased in weird ways ['ClanTemplates,' which appeares to be some kind of gaming site? has Al Gore with a convincing lead, and I don't even think he's running].

- Z

We have a WiebeTech hard drive enclosure at work and I'm very impressed with it, so I ordered another one for my new home backup drive (e:zobar,40088) . Have you ever read an order confirmation email? Have you ever enjoyed reading it?

Hello from WiebeTech,

We just received your order and we think it's just super duper that you've chosen to do business with us.

If you check the shipping status of your products hopefully you'll see everything is squared away and ready to go (those are called "out-the-doorsies"). Sometimes everybody wants the same thing you want at the same time you want to have it and we run out of stuff (those are called "out-of-stocksies"). If you ordered an "out-of-stocksie" it makes us sad, but then we're happy again because we know that it will soon turn into an "out-the-doorsie."

So after all the money and shipping twiddle bits are set to go then all the products you ordered are built skillfully by hand in a magic realm called "Production" by clever little beings called "Wiebes." The Wiebes will carefully test and format every function and characteristic of your product(s) before carefully packing it and sending it off with a smile and a wave of their little orange hands. If you want to check on the Wiebe's progress with your order you can send an email to shipping@wiebetech.com. But don't worry, they will send you an email when it goes out the door.

When you receive your order don't forget to register it (www.wiebetech.com/registration) so the Support Wiebes can assist you with your product should you need it.

Also, we're on the edge of our seat wondering what you think of WiebeTech, our products, our people, our website or even of life in general. Would you mind just taking this little survey for us? www.wiebetech.com/survey it won't take but a minute.

We had the greatest time doing business with you. You are now our new best friend!

Thanks a Bunch!
WiebeTech, LLC

It's like Charlie and the Hard Drive Enclosure Factory over here. I'm picturing Laverne putting a glove on my enclosure as it rolls by on the conveyor belt and waves to the assembly line.

- Z

There are certain orders of monks who will spend weeks pushing colored grains of sand into vibrant, colorful, breathtaking circular designs. When it's complete, they say a few prayers and sweep it into the river.

I spend my time pushing molecules around on silver platters. Up, down, up, up, down - you can't see the patterns, but they are there. I don't get a broom, though. All I get are SATA errors.

Back up your data. Mahalo.

- Z

The Queen City Roller Girls - Steel Town Tank Girls game yesterday was fun, if you're the kind of person who likes watching house fires, say, or CNN. Watch as Tori Nado decks Sweets in the face and fails to get ejected.



- Z

dammit

- Z

In response to (e:imk)'s question: YES! There is, in fact, something going on at Albright-Knox with the derby girls this Friday.

Much like the bout this Saturday there will be all kinds of disjoint entertainment at the gallery, both on and off wheels. In addition to outdoor demonstrations of the sport by QCRG, they will be screening Kansas City Bomber (1972) starring Raquel Welch. And also there will be a seventies disco party, hard cider tasting, and Francis Bacon.

- Z

of the hideous animated gif [cf: (e:twisted,39685) ]



- Z

Click his head . He sounds just like you. And for all yall Hindus, you can click sad Habu's tilak and watch him blow a question-mark bubble out his trunk.

And that's why I roll with Professor Giraffenstein the creation scientist.

EDITED TO ADD: Holy shit, you can totally pull on Mr Gruff's belt!

- Z

That would be (e:dragonlady7) . I can't say as I understand why that's any of your business, but I just wanted to get that out in the open, there. I have sex with women, and you can't change that about me.

This afternoon I skated in the Dyke March* with the Roller Girls. We had fun, but it was a bit grueling. We busted our asses to get to Kleinhan's by 11am only to stand around in skates for two hours. I still haven't properly broken in my skates so by the time we got to Bidwell my feet were killing me. I whipped off my skates at my earliest convenience and walked around in my socks the rest of the day.

Before the parade, one of the roller girls' girlfriends was talking about an encounter she'd had with a protester. The protester had worked himself into a holy fervor and she was pretty proud of her comeback, and I said gosh - it's good to know that everyone's having a good time. To some extent, I meant it- what fun is a gay pride parade without a little tête-à-tête with the fundies? But for the most part, it seemed that the few protesters there were, were pretty bored.

You know, there were probably more people in floats owned by churches than there were protesters. There were probably more grandmas & grandkids on the parade route than there were balls-to-the-wall sexual deviants. There's probably a commentary lurking in there somewhere, but gramma's gotta go soak her bunions.

- Z

_______________

• I thought it was the Pride Parade too, but the No Parking signs that the police put up along the parade route clearly stated Dyke March. Who am I to question the government?

New music: "Gay/Not Gay" by King Missile III.

On April 12, the Senate Judiciary Committee unanimously passed the Open Government Act ... [which] would strengthen the federal Freedom of Information Act...

The U.S. House of Representatives overwhelmingly approved a similar measure in March - but that bill was blocked from reaching the Senate floor for a May 24 vote because an unknown senator placed a secret hold on the bill.

A secret hold. On a bill that would help the public have greater access to public information. Think about that for a minute.

Well ok that's pretty fucked up, but the Society of Professional Journalists has come up with a quick and innovative way of weeding out the culprit

Now really - if you don't know how your elected, paid representatives are voting, how are you supposed to decide whether to continue electing and paying them?

- Z