I have the prettiest bicycle on the entire planet. No... make that the sexiest bicycle in the entire solar system. It's coloured a rich striking blue of copper sulphate with a metallic sleek grey accent. It's an aerodynamically designed complex machine with precision gears and a derailleur that looks as if it might be a futuristic part that broke away from the Kibo module. You lay your eyes on it and you know that you just want to ride it.

ALAS, appearances can be deceptive. The deception, in this case, is that I (the most non-mechanically oriented freak there ever was and will be on the planet) put it together! That means that the brake pads are not evenly spaced from the wheel. They rub and grate on the wheel every time I try to cycle. The sound that emanates resembles a sickening friction rub of... well, a warped brake assembly. I have tried many many tricks and tactics to make them not behave in this bizarre manner but as can be expected, I am having no luck fixing them.

Does any (e:strip)per have a fair idea about how to rectify this brackish situation? Do they know of any person or establishment within walking distance of downtown (~2-3 miles) who can take a look at my bike and tell me what I need to do, without charging $45... oh, and is likely to be available on a Saturday or a Sunday??!!

My ghost-of-the-biking-future shall be eternally grateful for any ideas, hints, directions, general advice etc..
-TP

(**this is where you think of someone and enthusiastically type away comments to this post. NUDGE NUDGE. Ahem.**)