(e:drchlorine) is a man's man. The one thing about ladies (well actually this applies to the gay contingent too, feelings are feelings you know!) that I've learned is that being upset over losing one is pretty much one of the stupidest things you can do. Naturally you might be shocked or hurt... or both. But the numbers are just too mind-bogglingly in your favor to find someone far, far better. The best way to go about it is to act professionally when the news breaks - say to him/her "Ok, if that is what you want that is what I want." Give a short, polite hug, then walk out the door. No crying, no jaws on the floor. Your now former partner will think to him/herself - "What the hell, I just spent a week feeling sick to my stomach over this, and he is just going to walk out the door and say NOTHING?! RAWWWWRRR!!!!!" You are the one that supposedly got fucked over, yet SHE/HE is the one that is upset. YOU WIN because A) You just got released back to being single, which means now you get to upgrade from your previous model, and B) your scheming and plotting ex is the one with the knot twisted in their belly over this bullshit.

I'm FINALLY starting to feel better... I've been sick all week with this weird and violently painful ear/nose/throat thing. I swear this is true but its going to sound cliche - chicken noodle did the trick! Time to go get my usual - mucho grande iced coffee. Or maybe an iced redeye (ooh la la).

Besides that I have to go to the garage and get an oil change and another tire. I love going to the repair shop - the smell of rubber and oil reminds me of my grandfathers garage, which of course reminds me of my grandfather... who I miss very much. Grandma is still kickin' though - she is one of the funniest people I know. She is curious about where I go and what I do so I thought of something cool to give to her - a laminated map of the United States (and printouts of the countries I visit) and a bunch of gold stars. I put the stars on all the airports I've gone through, and when I go through a new one I call her when I land and tell her to stick a star there. Sometimes I grab the hotel stationery and write to her.

I love my grandma!

I'm going to refrain from doing this too much, since I absolutely love the community spirit of this blogsite and after meeting the fellas and ladies at the party I respect them 100%. Unfortunately (e:robin) is trying to start an insult pissing match with a merciless Grand Fucking Master insult slinger. You might think you are mean-spirited (e:robin) but I guaranfuckingtee you that you can't hold a candle to me when I'm inspired and provoked.

Firstly, leave DrC out of this. He vaguely mentioned (rather skillfully I might add) her penchant for being a drama queen in a blog several months ago, and I doubt he could give two shits about "your girl" right about now. However, any free-thinking person that read Soyeon's journal could come to that conclusion on their own months ago without DrC's help. I'm not criticizing her... for me being a drama queen isn't a bad personality trait.

The truth of the matter is that most girls don't like hearing THE FUCKING TRUTH about their friends or themselves, EVER. Its rare to find a girl capable of fending for themselves in a mature manner when criticism comes their way. To be honest though, I think I met a couple such ladies at the party and I know that normal ladies do exist out there! (e:robin) only proved that universal fact and at the same time uncovered her own thin as rice paper skin and severe maturity issues. Who cares if Soyeon is a drama queen? Its not a mortal sin. I have female friends that are drama queens, so what? Jay talked to Soyeon via IMs, met her in person and liked her. She's a nice girl apparently.

It is a mortal sin, however, to mention that when her best friend reads it apparently. Guess what? If you don't like what I said about her (e:robin), go fucking die somewhere. I could care less about what you think about what I said. Typically this wouldn't even be worth a retort on my part. Hell, I know for a fact that you wouldn't have the fucking spine to say anything derogatory to me toe-to-toe. The difference between you and I is that everything you are reading right now would be told to your face without any hesitation.

(e:robin) I don't care if you don't like me, or if you think I'm an asshole, or if you think I'm wrong, or that you don't like Republicans. You don't know a god damn thing about me - how dare you act like a child. I'll give you a little insight - I do human rights work in countries your leisure travelling ass wouldn't DARE step into. I know for a fact that I've improved working conditions for people in both close and faraway places, and you better believe I feel good about it. I'm not one of those guys that sends money to CCF to feel good about himself - I have my feet in the dirt in the poorest countries in the Western Hemisphere. I've seen things in those places that have made me cry, laugh, be shocked, be angry... and thankfully we get the authority to make things right for people who deserve basic treatment. I love what I do, I'm proud of it, I believe in it strongly and I hope I can do this job forever. HOLY FUCKING SHIT, YOU MEAN A REPUBLICAN HAS A BIG HEART AND IS LIKE THIS AS A PERSON? Hear that? That is your preconceived notion of me shattering into a million pieces. You have no basis for acting like you have to me, except to show everybody how much of a brat you are.

Your inane ramblings mean fuck all to me... although I'm amused that you would take a picture of your pussy, crop the photo and superimpose it on your cat. Thats not art, its fucking disturbing. Jackson Pollock was disturbing too, but his art is hung in galleries all over the world and I happen to like his work... so he gets a pass.

Grow up and get over the fact that you and your friend are imperfect. That is what grown men and women do. When you reach that point (and Buffalo once again) feel free to shake me down for a drink - I'm willing to forgive you and apologize for writing what I just wrote. Until then -

x0x0

josh

$75 out of my progressively (a chill runs down my spine when I use that word) lighter wallet got me this. The picture doesn't even do it justice.



Its frickin' beautiful. Clear w/orange swirls, and a color-changing male end. Its blown specificly so that you will not drink da dirty water if its a little full... and I admit I've been known to do that on occasion :(

Some asshole gauged and punctured one of my tires, shortly after I arrived at home from work. I swear to you all if I find out who did it they will pay for it in blood!!!

Jason

I broke another bong last night. This is the third bong that I've broken in our apartment in the past 4 years, and I think (e:jason) has had enough of me breaking the freaking glass. So, I think I'm going to spend a good amount on a piece because -

A) Since its my money I'm spending I'll be more careful
B) Three bongs... WTF. I deserve this punishment
C) One of the bongs I broke was a personal gift to my brother from a good friend

Now... what to buy and how much to spend. The pragmatist in me is screaming "BUY PLASTIC YOU IDIOT!!" But what self-respecting smoker is going to smoke out of plastic except in some dire circumstances? The only answer is to buy glass, and make sure the damn thing is heavy. I don't have anything to smoke anyhow, my feelings on this are mixed. I want something with orange and blue on it... something stylish. People should feel blessed and lucky to be smoking out of my bong.

I've spent the afternoon drinking coffee with light cream and hazelnut flavor shots... delicious! Also, I've been "procuring" more Stereolab, since the only album of theirs I like is their most recent. I should give the earlier stuff a chance to A) broaden my horizons, and B) understand the bands musical progression.

I tried to play (e:robin)'s videos using firefox. BZZZZZT! It won't download or find a suitable plugin.

I tried to name my fantasy football team "Hippie Granola Crunch" but I'm short one letter. I can't name my team "Hippie Granola Crunc" so I need to think of something else.

Oooh, I thought of something. "Crunchy Granola Crew" but it still isn't the same :(

OH! This blog site is the super duper ultra coolest, but I found one that I think you all would like to check out on occasion -

UPDATE - I was going to mention this plane crash in Toronto. First of all, the fact that 309 people are still alive after that is nothing short of a miracle - those people should be dead right now. Its a little bit unnerving considering I fly Sunday... but I'm not skurred. I'm just really happy for those people that managed to survive that crash.

Finally my company has me on assignment! I'm actually thrilled - although I've thoroughly enjoyed my time here in Buffalo I'm REALLY, REALLY, REALLY bored. It turns out that I'm spending 5 days in North Carolina next week. The monthly schedule looks really exciting - California, Guatemala, Mexico, Honduras, Dominican Republic, and points in between.

One of the audits our company got assigned is in Hawaii, so of course my boss is going. The good thing about that is that there are 2 weeks of audits I know he won't be going to... so that means that there is a great chance for international travel for moi, in consideration of above said scheduled places to go. I don't want to go to Mexico since the State Department put a travel warning on Mexico... but there are 9 audits to be finished there so I have a feeling I'm just going to have to suck it up. I'm told Honduras is a great place to go because of the A)women B)hospitality and C) the women. The overseas trips are nice because we basically get treated like royalty and stay in the top of the top of the top of the line hotels. In Guatemala the hotel where we stay is absolutely magnificent - if I go I'll take photos to share with the (e:strip) community. Seriously, its the most romantic looking hotel I've ever seen. I would take a lady there for a weekend in a heartbeat.

I'm sick :( I don't know what came over me but I've been feeling horrible. I literally have left the apartment once in the last two days... just to go get some food at Wilson Farms. Any good ideas for sinus/cold type things? I need to beat this before I have to fly.

The party was great!

The Ho sisters are purty and really nice - I had a lot of fun chatting them up and getting to know them. (e:ladycroft) is not a casual videogame player, so when you are challenged to a game of Mario Kart and she grabs a remote - be prepared for your doom. I stole one victory though!

I didn't know until this afternoon that (e:robin) was there - I now realize she was the one with the red scarf that was mousey and quiet in the living room. You are quiet, girl! Aren't you the one with this radical and interesting art? Had I realized it was her I would have made a point to say hello and wish her good luck and lots of fun in Germany.

(e:hodown) had the killer sangria - now I want to learn how to make it.

I met a lot of cool people last night and I hope that the hosts were pleased with the outcome of the soiree. Jay and I fully intend on crashing the party for the 20,000th post!

I openly admit my faults. Some people aren't mature enough to do that, but I am not part of that crowd. However, I am very proud of my strengths - I'm unflappably confident and like to give some of that confidence to other people through encouragement. (e:jessbob) - stop freaking out about your test - you're a smart guy and you are going to do well... being nervous about an exam is going to hurt you rather than help you. Do your work, study hard, cram every bit of your brain with the information you need to know, go take your exam, get an A, then go to sleep. Have you ever seen "What The Bleep Do We Know?" Theres a study they talk about in the movie where people can make water react differently based solely on mental power. They have people concentrate on being happy, mad, nervous, the entire spectrum of emotions. Your body is made up almost entirely of water - when you are angry or nervous remember that!

Anyhow, back to me (Haha!). Besides my natural instinct to bring people up when they are down, I dislike it when people say they can't do things. BULLSHIT! I had a guy say to me once that he wished he could go back to school and become an accountant. I turned to him and said, "of course you can do it - just do what needs to be done, get your degree, get that job and enjoy what you reap from your hard work!" To me when people are worried about whether or not they can achieve something they are thinking of the steps they need to take as BARRIERS rather than OBSTACLES that require necessary steps that can and will be overcome if you put honest hard work into it.

I serve as a confidant to my closest friends because they know that they are going to get an interesting and positive bit of advice from me. When my brother or other friends of mine are depressed I tell them that negative energy is making it impossible for them to have positive energy. Think about that for a minute. Once upon a tiime Joshypoo had a nervous breakdown over a girl - this girl had me wrangled up so badly that I literally left Buffalo for 3 weeks and didn't come back until I had the right frame of mind. I stayed with my dad and cooked together with him, worked in the yard at my grandmas house, went for runs... there was also a point in time where I didn't leave my dads living room for an entire week. What I learned during those 3 weeks was that NEVER AGAIN would I let something like that unwind me and make me forget about who I am. How insane was it for me to let somebody do that to me? Why should somebody or something make me lose my center and sense of self? I came back to Buffalo a new man with a new, meaner leaner attitude. The negative energy made it impossible for me to have positive energy - AKA I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel because I was too absorbed with mulling over what was wrong rather than everything that was right. Know thyself. Any other thing thats wrong is irrelevant because its temporary.

What I'm leading to in a rather longwinded way is this - what happens when the eternally confident and optimistic guy feels down for once? Does he not talk about it? I'm kind of blue today. My personal solution to this today is to make apple crisp and listen to Belle & Sebastian. What I really want to to is sit on my porch and drink heavily but I know that won't get me anywhere!

Today I read a report concerning liberal White House correspondent Helen Thomas. She says that if Dick Cheney runs for President (which he vehemently claimed he would NOT do back in February) she would kill herself. Honey don't let a silly thing like a Cheney candidacy stop you!

Al Ulthman (or whatever he is) wrote a laughable article concerning Charles Krauthammer in the latest issue of The Beast. I think Al needs a reminder that he is fucking Al Ulthman and not a legitimate journalist that could even carry Krauthammer's jock strap. The thing I found most hysterical was that he claimed that liberals are not actively engaging in forcing liberalism on America, and that all liberals wanted was for people to choose what they wanted.

Well, Al, if thats the case then explain -

1. The 9th Circuit in San Fran

2. Roe vs. Wade. I support womens right to choose, but abortion was a states rights issue in the 70's and women got them back then... don't be fooled. Its universally agreed upon by lawmakers both on the left and the right that Roe was horrible law and set precedent for the Supreme Court to commit judicial activism from that point onward.

3. If you want Americans to choose, then why the fuck do liberals actively pursue said legislating from the bench instead of going to the ballot box? Answer: they don't want Americans to vote on their issues because they will lose. So much for offering Americans a choice!

4. This is unrelated but is worth pointing out - why are people like Al concerned with a judicial activism from the right when hypocritically enough they themselves have been conducting that behavior for 30 years now? Answer - liberal activism = good and anything else is bad and wrong.

Case closed.