Ok, So I was just going to Title my entry:
"What the Fuck I Just Have to Express My Rage", but (totally not connected to my original feeling, I was not allowed enough characters to say the whole thing - that goes with the mood - oh Webmaster Paul (I think I should have some in with the man in charge), (Ok, return to the original thought)

I'm at Bob's house, and I wanted to show Tracy my journal entries, and Bob has NetZero, because it's free, and because he is even more computer-illiterate than I (actually, compared to Bob I'm like Bill Gates, and if you'd compare Paul to me, He'd be Stephen Hawkins - ha ha ) So NetZero, It's this free shit, and no matter how big you make the window, or if you move the top bar around, to try to make the top tool bar (the netzero map, and whatnot) go up to the top, I can't fucking scroll down, and see the shit that's below the shit that fits in the size of the monitor? That's just wrong. Is it because of the free-ness? Fuck. Anywho, had to get it out... We're all fucked up, and I'm with two people: one who needs help to log on, and the other who wouldn't even know what "log on" meant. Thanks for the outlet!

As an aside:
Thank you Paul for finally being someone who has responded to something I've put in my journal. I'm not one who likes to share a bunch of my thoughts (particularly to or with people who may not respond, people I may not know (or people who may know me (that could be worse!)), people who may not even be listening), but on Paul's encourgement, and also my desire to keep up with the ins and outs of my friends Paul Terry & Matt (and also my love and yearning for Elmwood; since I was 10 I love that Strip - I spent Three Years of residence, and lots of crazy shit with that as my address - fuck Elmwood Elmwood Elmwood you know? Well, I guess considering this is the Elmwood STrip website journal yo do know. God bless you - that is a rare thing of which we are blessed. I live in San Diego, and, whereas there is one place in Buffalo to be as a young person reaching and looking, a place where shit is going down and happening, and you would always see something cool, or strange, or scary, or wierd, or dramatic, but sometimes you'd even be lucky enough to experience those insane and ridiculous things, and chalk it up as one of your adventures. In San Diego, there are a thousand of those places. But still, there is only one Elmwood. And I love it, and still crave it. I used to hate Buffalo, and think - fuck, can't wait to get out of this town, nothing going on, elders and authorities always selling us out, and taking shit in the pocket instead of good for the city - very little prospects of anything getting better, in a lot of ways people walking around with a chip on their shoulders because the Bills lost four fucking Super Bowls, or Bethleham Steel went down, or there's nothing to do, or because they lived in South Buffalo and had to look at rundown grainmills and factories everyday, or from Kenmore: the Prozac of suburbs, where there was nothing so fucked up we felt we had a right to be pissed, really, but sedated enough we had nothing at all to fight for, really either... It took tragedy and absolute humility to feel, and know the home of Buffalo, and understand the value and weight of the things I love there. Paul, remember the picture, just a couple of words: Burger King crown, Deleware Park Bridge, lighting fluid allowing us to cheat God and set snow on fire, or Allentown, and our Oregano? Or the footbridge which is really a dam in the lake when I fell through the ice, or being on the islands of the historical society for like 10 hours in the dead of winter - fuck. I love Elmwood.

Am writing this all in vain?

"hello, hello, hello
is there anybody in there
just nod if you can here me
is there anyone at home
ok, ok, ok
I do believe it's working good
that'll keep you going
f
or

the show
c'mon it's time to go

....there is no pain you are receiving
a distant ships smoke on the horizon
you are only coming through in waves
your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying.


I have come comfortably numb"

or some such thing (I can't verify my accuracy).

So anywho, I read people journals sometimes just to check people out, and I wonder if all my energy is in vain, so to indulge me, all who read this please send a shout out in response, just for me to see who's hearing me.

Gracias,
Peace
Sara

Hi Chris,
I met you while I was home, although briefly.

In response, two things:

My friend Bob (the zig zag man - who I hope to post a picture of soon)was watching the state of the union address, and I was leaving. I said, "Honey, can I get you a heave bucket to release all the spew you're gonna ingest?" We all laughed. Also, I got this email some time ago, and it's really interesting (also I quasi-answer to the question of "Where is John Wilkes Booth when we need him?"

Some presidential history. Look what happens when a President gets
elected in a year with a "0" at the end. Also notice it goes in
increments of 20 years.
> >
> > 1840: William Henry Harrison (died in office)
> >
> > 1860: Abraham Lincoln (assassinated)
> >
> > 1880: James A. Garfield (assassinated)
> >
> > 1900: William McKinley (assassinated)
> >
> > 1920: Warren G. Harding (died in office)
> >
> > 1940: Franklin D. Roosevelt (dies in office)
> >
> > 1960: John F. Kennedy (assassinated)
> >
> > 1980: Ronald Reagan (survived assassination attempt)
> >
> > 2000: George W. Bush ????????????
> >
> > And to think that we had two guys fighting it out in the courts to be
> > the one elected in 2000.
> >
> > You might also be interested in this.
> >
> >
> > Have a history teacher explain this

---

if they can.
> >
> > Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
> >
> > John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.
> >
> > Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
> >
> > John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.
> >
> > Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
> >
> > Both wives lost their children while living in the White House.
> >
> > Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
> >
> > Both Presidents were shot in the head.
> >
> > Now it gets really weird.
> >
> >
> > Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy.
> >
> > Kennedy's Secretary was named Lincoln.
> >
> > Both were assassinated by Southerners.
> >
> > Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson.
> >
> > Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.
> >
> > Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.
> >
> > John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839.
> >
> > Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939.
> >
> > Both assassins were known by their three names.
> >
> > Both names are composed of fifteen letters.
> >
> > Now hang on to your seat.
> >
> > Lincoln was shot at the theater named 'Ford.'
> >
> > Kennedy was shot in a car called 'Lincoln' made by 'Ford.'
> >
> > Lincoln was shot in a theater and his assassin ran and hid in a
> > warehouse.
> >
> > Kennedy was shot from a warehouse and his assassin ran and hid in a
> > theater.
> >
> > Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.
> >
> >
> >
> > And here's the kicker...
> >
> >
> > A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland
> >
> > A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.
> >
> > Creepy huh? Inform as many people as you know, cause:
> >
> > Hey, this is one history lesson people don't mind reading .

I subscribe to MM's e-newsletters, and this is what I got this morning:

January 23, 2004

George W. Bush, A.W.O.L.

In last night's Democratic Presidential debate in New Hampshire, broadcast on the Fox News (Nusciance?) Channel and ABC's Nightline, Peter Jennings went after Wesley Clark -- and me -- because I said I want to see Clark debate Bush... "The General vs. The Deserter."

Jennings, referring to me as "the controversial filmmaker," asked if Clark wanted to distance himself from me and my "reckless" remark. Clark would not back down, stating how "delighted" he was with my support, and that I was entitled to say what I wanted to say -- AND that I was not the only one who had made these charges against Bush.

The pundits immediately went berserk after the debate. As well they should. Because they know that they -- and much of the mainstream media -- ignored this Bush AWOL story when it was first revealed by an investigation in the Boston Globe (in 2000). The Globe said it appeared George W. Bush skipped out in the middle of his Texas Air National Guard service -- and no charges were ever brought against him. It was a damning story, and Bush has never provided any documents or evidence to refute the Globe's charges.

George W. Bush was missing for at least a 12 month period. That is an undisputed fact. If you or I did that, we would serve time.

Senator Daniel Inouye, Democrat of Hawaii and a World War II veteran, joined with Vietnam vets Sen. Max Cleland and Sen. Bob Kerrey to challenge Bush on the gaps in his military record. "The question is, where were you, Governor Bush? What would you do as commander-in-chief if someone in the National Guard did the same thing? At the least, I would have been court-martialed. At the least, I would have been placed in prison," Inouye said.

The Washington Post, the New Republic, and others also presented the evidence that Bush had fled from duty.

The most comprehensive piece I've seen was on Tom Paine.com with all the relevant links and documents.

There are far more important issues to deal with in this election year. Poor Peter Jennings. What was he doing on Fox? All that seems left of his Canadianess is the way he pronounced my name ("Michael Moooore"). The question he posed to Clark was typical of a lazy media looking for a way to distract the viewers from the real issues: the war, the economy, and the failures of the Bush administration. But if they want to really get into the issue of Bush and his "service record," then I say, bring it on! The facts are all there, including the empty flyboy suit.
Yours,

Michael Moore

mmflint@aol.com

www.michaelmoore.com



PS: This is the second time I've been thrown into a New Hampshire presidential debate. Four years ago, Republican Alan Keyes was asked why he jumped into Michael Moore's mosh pit to the music of Rage Against the Machine. Now THAT was an issue of substance!

Hello Little Brother. Happy birthday, my friend. I miss you, and I wish I was there to celebrate it with you!
Love Always
Sara

Yesterday I touched on Michael Moore's Oscar acceptance speech. I found the text on his website, and for those of you who hadn't heard it, here you go:

"On behalf of our producers Kathleen Glynn and Michael Donovan from Canada, I'd like to thank the Academy for this. I have invited my fellow documentary nominees on the stage with us, and we would like to - they're here in solidarity with me because we like nonfiction. We like nonfiction and we live in fictitious times. We live in the time where we have fictitious election results that elects a fictitious president. We live in a time where we have a man sending us to war for fictitious reasons. Whether it's the fiction of duct tape or fiction of orange alerts we are against this war, Mr. Bush. Shame on you, Mr. Bush, shame on you. And any time you got the Pope and the Dixie Chicks against you, your time is up. Thank you very much."

As always, throughout time, politics and opinion... Fuck, what's it all about?

I'm not real smart, politically. I have my opinions, and am the first to admit a lot of them are unfounded and wrong. But, I do like thinking, and I like people that make me think, even if I don't agree.

Michael Moore: I love the bastard.

www.michaelmoore.com/

I've read a couple of his books, and to be honest, he goes a little off the hook even for me (and I lived in a Bush-run Texas - talk about scary!), but I love the hell out of him. He's one of those people that if I ever got to meet, I'd just want to give him a big hug.

Check out his website (link above - I hope I did it right). There's always a lot of stuff to check out. I just about always crack up, and sometimes, even while I'm sitting here in my fucking cubicle pretending to work, he makes me just cry.

One feature he has on his website is letters from soldiers in Iraq (he gets stuff from various sources: military magazines, home-town newspapers, where sometimes the letter from little johnny got his gun writes to mom and dad, and it makes the fucking Ken-Ten Bee). Today, in particular, he's got a letter on there that a soldier wrote to him, and it's just beautiful. I don't like war, I don't want it, I would never fight for anything just because the guy in the suit says so (now, don't get me wrong, I'd fight if I felt the right to), but I thank God for people like this dude, and all the others out there in uniform (tools or not).

And I agree with him. I'm not sure who saw Michael Moore's Oscar acceptance speech (although from the anti-TV talk on the journals, I assume not many of you). I was watching with my very naive friend Bob, and I cheered. Bob says, I just don't understand why he would do that. I told Bob, because he can. Because that's America. When you can receive and deserve an award by some stupid, yet for some reason respected, committee, and not have to kow-tow and say, o, thank you, o wise ones.
Rock on, Mike!

"Emancipate yourself from mental slavery
None but ourselves can free our minds
Have no fear for atomic energy
Cause none of them can stop the time"

In response to Paul's television rant:

In a lot of ways, I completely agree. I think that television is a whole shit load of garbage, and that people spend way too many hours of their lives deer-eyed in front of it. It makes it real easy to tune in and drop out, without any effort at all... and, here's the best part - you can still have something to talk about with all those other losers at the office, whether it's the latest Survivor refugee, or the best toilet-germ obliterator.

When I watch TV, sometimes it's for those reasons, entertainment, easy mindlessness - sometimes the voices in my head talk so fast, I like to watch TV so my subconcious has something to keep it's mind occupied while my conscience can just chill .

But usually, I like to watch it from an archeological standpoint. I've been well aware of the propaganda in television for some time. (I think I realized when I was a house-wife, at home with my few-month old - although I'd been corrupted as a young girl for years over it - and I saw a commercial for this detergent which makes your clothes smoother, so that you can spend time doing really important things, rather then ironing your 8-year-old's school clothes - I was all, wait a minute, you're telling me I'm going to have to start ironing jeans & t-shirts to be a good mom?; I started freaking out a bit (because I hate being caught up in all that vanity bullshit (although some might disagree that wanting your clothes not wrinkled is vain - I just don't have time for that shit), and then realized - fuck this: it's the same reason I don't shave my legs.)

Of course the media fucks with us - people wouldn't make millions of dollars and political careers out of it if it wasn't powerful... And for those who actually believe that the things they see are the way things are and should always be, those people really do become damaged and brain-washed into buying that SUV, and their God Bless AMerica stickers for the back.

However, for those of us who understand, and see what they're doing, I like to look at it as getting to know the enemy and the means they carry out their evil plans...

You've killed all our leaders
I don't even have to do nothing to you
You've caused your own country to fall...
Tell it to me brother

God bless ya, Terry, I'm glad you're turned on by our brother Stevie, he's the shit.

Now, an intersted segue, let's see if you see the relation...

I also wanted to respond to Matt's recent entry about the movie the Iron Giant. I've seen that with Elijah (The sledding 4-year old in question in Terry's journal), and I think it's a great movie. A lot of times in kid films, they're either inherantly violent (like all those wierdo Japanimation craps (Sorry, Terry, and anyone else who's into that stuff - I just don't get it)), or there all rainbows and sunshine. I liked the Iron Giant because it brings up the many shades, lengths, depths and contours of the right- and wrong-ness of violence. Sorry, but if I was a great big iron giant, developed to kill but taught to love, and the entire army was shooting at me and my best little friend, I might blow em all to hell, too! But it brings to mind to kids, I hope, also how our actions effect the people around us, and that violence breeds violence, which is bred by fear. I also really dug the beatnik character, too; I though he was cool. A recommendation for all ages (although you "grown-ups" out there might need a little herbal stimulation to get into it, if you know what I mean.)

I miss my brothers, and hope you see you soon.!

So here I am back at my desk in San Diego. I had a great time visiting last week, and was super stoked to be able to see everyone. I miss mis amours Paul, Terry & Matt very much; I had a great time hanging out with everyone, and also meeting their friends, which was actually fun! I think this is the first time (besides Terry & Matt) that Paul's friends and I actually got along - that's pretty refreshing! Of course, I can be rather obnoxious, so perhaps that could be part of it! ha ha (No, really, I'm not obnoxious, who me?)

Anyway, It was really nice to have good time being with friends, and being home. Check you later...