This is one of those life posts.

I'm rethinking my future and as always never know if I'm making the right decision, so any input would be fine.

Here's the deal...

So I've been planning for several months to stay in Buffalo for the remainder of this school year, and then move out of state somewhere to go to graduate school. I'm 23, I teach high school music and would be going for my Master's Degree in Vocal Performance or Pedagogy. Now I'm starting to think maybe I want to stay in Buffalo and wait another year to start my Master's.

The pros, benefits would be...

I can save more money. I can take voice lessons and improve my singing, so that I could sound better for my grad school auditions. I can get more teaching experience and delay the fact that I'm simply going to leave my students. I get to spend more time with my friends and family, and can continue singing with the groups I sing with.

The cons would be...

It is really just the way I feel. I have always been afraid to just settle. I feel like if I don't go away to grad school, I'm wasting my potential and talent and taking the easy way out by just staying here. I have felt that way for awhile and I don't know why.
Plus grad school may be a nice place to meet people. And I ain't getting any younger. By the time I get to grad school, everyone else will probably be married with 2 kids. Ha.

The bottom line is, most people move away because they are tired of where they are. But I am honestly not tired of being here at all. I love my friends, I love my family, I, well, my job is okay, I love my voice teacher. So I feel like if I leave...am I doing it for the right reasons?

There's nowhere in Buffalo I can do my gradwork. I KNOW that I eventually want to be a full time graduate student. The problem is just...do I want to wait? Will I feel like I missed out or that I'm not doing all that I could?

MEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

I'm sitting in the Peabody Marriott in Massachusetts. The girl at the front desk says Peabody in a very funny way but you'd have to ask me to say it for you because I can't type it.

We drove through Salem a little bit last night. It seems a cool place and I'm looking forward to going there during the day. Today we are going to Boston. We may go to the Aquarium. I saw a brochure for the Mapparium and remembered how much (e:Mike) and (e:Maureen) loved it. Maybe I could get there too. What a long drive it was, and I had to drive the whole way because my friend who is with me doesn't know how to drive standard. Yuck!

ps I don't think I have gone on a vacation yet that something didn't spill all over the place somewhere. Always a bottle of shampoo, or body wash, or hair gel, or something. Seriously I have a streak going. I spilled (expensive) shampoo on the backseat of my car because it was slightly open, soaking a couple bottles, a shirt, and part of a book of sheet music. It is so annoying, why don't I just check to make sure the bottles are closed all the way!?!?

pps I was invited to sing at a concert in Fredonia in February. It makes me nervous just thinking about it because I haven't sang for people in a long time. I also of course would need to look great and sound better to wow the ex. What should I do...I have like 3 months to work on it and I've been singing the songs since this summer so theoretically they should be ready but I'm already scared!!!....

It is sooooo easy to distract myself from doing work...

Here are the rest of the pics from Halloweeeeeen!!!



(e:Jill) showing off her well-earned prize


admiring (e:kookcity2000) 's costume



looking at the votes...




















gee I wonder why we all had red facepaint all over ourselves












"Mary Kate, this isn't funny anymore."


happy halloween!

So I'm going to post some more of my pictures but first I need to discuss my evening. Me, (e:Mike) , (e:Jill) and (e:Beast) started with dinner at Carrabba's which was very delicious, as we were anticipating (I'll let (e:Mike) mention the scrapbook because he will do a much better job than me) They had great bread which just makes a restaurant seem so much better. I would recommend it to one and all.

Then we headed out to the Eastern Hills Mall, well, Syms, to Frightworld. Frightworld has five different "houses" inside a big building, and you pay for one ticket and then go to each one once. Well individually I think maybe we would all do okay, but put the four of us together and we can scare the crap out of each other by just building up the tension and scariness of any moment. Let's just say that we actually had to be escorted out of the first house through the fire exit/kiddie door. It was really, really scary!!!! We needed a break after that. Eventually (e:Beast) and I went through all five, and (e:Mike) and (e:Jill) made it through three of them! The two scariest were definitely the first house and then the insane asylum. An example of its scariness: after about 10 steps into the asylum, when you are walking in the pitch black trying to find the first room, out of NOWHERE, a GLOWING FACE appeared out of nowhere for a split second and then disappeared. It was terrifying, and it just got worse and worse, with a crazy man just following behind us the whole time and being in rooms where everything looks the same and you have no idea how to get out...

But overall it was fun, I haven't been to a haunted house in a long time. I'm glad we went and that I made it through all five...wooo!!!

Okay onto some more pictures....
















This may be my favorite picture of (e:Mike) yet

So last night the Starlight Express crew made an appearance at (e:ladycroft) 's Halloween partay, and it was a great time! In our usual style, our costumes were thrown together at the very last minute but turned out excellent, if I do say so myself. I took about 100 pictures last night (I know, ridiciulous) and I've narrowed down my top like...40...so here is the first batch...


(e:Mike) almost sewed his red shirt thing too tight to go over his head...


my legs covered in sparkly garland














I smell userpics...


(e:Mike)


me


(e:Jill)


(e:Diana) and (e:Jill)




my fun sparkly eyelashes up close!


at the party



more to come....!

I think I am definitely not a person who can have ridiculous marathon drinking nights (the only exception being Fredfest). When I'm in the mood, I am totally okay with going out around 11 or 12, having a good time at the bar or wherever, and leaving when they close (in Fredonia it's still 2 am) and going home and passing out. But some people are hardcore champion partiers, who will go out and then even when the bars close, will go to a restaurant or a random house and continue to party until who knows when. That is just not how I roll. Like here was my weekend...got to Fredonia for Alumni Weekend on Friday around 10, went out as soon as I got there, got quite drunk, left at 2, came home with a bunch of people and passed out on a couch. A successful evening. Then LAAAST night, the night started with Beer Pong around 8 (using Busch Ice...24 oz cans...see below), and then we went out around 10:30, and stayed out till 2. And then I had to follow around my very drunk friend to this totally random house where people were just drinking more beer and sitting around talking about Family Guy and reminiscing about things that I had no idea about. I was generally miserable and soooo tired and cranky knowing that I had to get up at 8 am. Now you may think that I may not have enjoyed myself because I wasn't that drunk and/or had to get up that early, but I am quite positive that it wouldn't have mattered. I am interested in like...time periods of maybe 4 hours of drinking and general mayhem and then I'm finished.

Again with the exception of Fredfest. Fredfest is the greatest.

I will finish this entry with a menagerie of pictures from the weekend. I love my digital camera so much and I'm glad people are wiling to constantly be ready for a picture or two or a hundred.





me and my friend Nicole who currently lives in Cleveland


me and my friend Lindsay who currently lives on Long Island



me and Bella


Beer Pong


Our drink of choice for the evening


An old school McDonald's Garfield mug that held my beer for the evening!


Me at the scummiest bar in Fredonia...I still can't believe I ended up there!!!

So I'm in the midst of my week off of school. It is really crazy how lucky (e:Mike) (e:Jill) and I were to not lose power even once during the storm. (e:Mike) told me that over 90% of people in Kenmore-Tonawanda lost power. That's so crazy/awesome, because I basically get a week off of school for no reason. At least for me.

I really love my Macbook but it definitely prevents me from going to bed early anymore. Now that I have wireless internet, I carry it with me right to bed and just chat online or browse the Internet until all hours of the night. It's been okay since I don't really have to get up for anything this week, but I wil have to start restraining myself once normal life sets back in and we actually have school. I 'm glad to have the week off but I know I will pay for it sooner or later by missing days off of some vacation or something. Ohhhh well.

Hey by the way everyone check this out...you can see how many people in the United States have the same name as you! I'm not sure how accurate it is but it's still entertaining. I think there are like 29 people who share my name...

Here's the link

Just cuz I feel like it I'm going to put up some pictures that I've taken with my Macbook - and yes there MIGHT be an effect on a couple of them...guess which ones. Goodnight everyone and I hope that everyone gets power back very very very soon.





puppies!!


me and (e:Mike)


me and (e:Diana)


(e:Mike) and (e:Diana) spending a snowy Friday the 13th at my house




me contemplating life...or just playing with my computer

Thanks so much to (e:jenks) for the photo resizing advice! Here are a couple pictures from Kenmore and the way my street looks (as well as pretty much every other street I ran by today). I'm also putting some pics from the housewarming party on the 30th. p.s. Happy birthday (e:lilho) and I hope you're all having a good time at the mansion!











And some housewarming party pictures for your entertainment...

(e:Paul) ...or anyone else who may know...since the pictures I take on my digital camera are too big to put into my journal, what is a quick way to make them smaller or more compact so that they are the correct size? The only way I've been doing it is taking a picture of the screen and cropping out the picture that I want.

Granted that doesn't take THAT long but I feel like there must be another way. Oh and I have a MacBook, if that helps. Thanks people.

Days and nights like these make me want to always be within walking distance of my best friends...