so, my first two weeks of school, i was proud of how well i handled the enormous transition i just went through. i was not getting stressed at all about the fact that i suddenly was extremely busy all the time. i just moved in to a new house and greeted everyone (even the cat i caught peeing on my bed) with a smile. i even tricked my roommate in to thinking that i was a morning person because i would have a happy thought as i walked in to the kitchen and would come in every morning smiling.

well, yesterday, the last day of my third week, it got to me. i found myself in the computer lab at ub getting frustrated because i have to learn a whole new email program that is not user friendly in the slightest. i was emailing my pharmacology professor who i cannot stand. it takes a LOT for me to not like someone. i don't care who you are or how you express yourself, as long as you are a good person. if i can find some sliver of good in you, if i know that you live your life in a way that expressed that you are trying to identify with that part of you that is good.

it's hard for me to find the goodness in this professor. he has done all of these things:

1. came in to class around fifteen minutes late on the first day of class, which doesn't start until 6:45 pm. he said he got stuck at an intersection at ub for all that time. yes, it was snowing, but you are the professor. you make it a point to leave earlier to get to class on time.

2. spends the entire time READING the power point notes he made for the class. really, he doesn't explain anything, and the slides that he created have a ton of vocabulary that only someone who had taken a number of courses that were not even prerequesites for the class would know.

3. tells jokes. if you are a good teacher and you tell jokes, i will appreciate them. if you are doing it as a way to trick students in to liking you, i do not appreciate it at all. i was pretty much growling each time he wasted our time telling us something that did not pertain to the class.

4. lies. yes. in one of his "jokes," he gave us medical misinformation. he was describing the way an epidural is done and he pantomimed a needle that was over twice the size of the size that is really used. he continued his joke for dramatic effect, raised an eyebrow, and said in a scary voice, "does that scare you, punk?"
i was very, very glad to see that one of the students in class called him on how he exaggerated the size of the needle. the teacher then demonstrated the correct needle size.

5. on the second night he was lecturing, he stopped mid sentence to completely embarass this korean girl who was videotaping his lecture. i mean, he was RUDE in a bad way. i know the other students in class feel like i do about this as well.
i know my lecture is recorded on the ub website, and if i were computer literate, i would find that clip and post it here. i cannot describe how horrible he was to this girl. i really think he should be fired or at least be given a severe warning for what he did.

so,

i did all these things i'm not proud of yesterday at the ub library:

--i said and/or muttered "fuck" aloud at least six times in the computer lab.

--i wrote "fucking asshole professor" on the quiz i just took when the teacher i just described put a trick question on the quiz.

--i was unpleasant to the librarians when they couldn't find a book on reserve.

---i sent a theatening email to the company that i ordered my book from on amazon.com because it was supposedly delivered 10 days ago and i never got it. they had not responded to my previous request to contact UPS about this. (the bad news is that they responded within 10 minutes of recieving my threatening email, when they did not respond to the kind email i had sent them four days earlier.)

--when i was trying to figure out how to do something on my ub email, i sent myself a test email, in which i wrote "grrr."

i was so disappointed in myself.


i decided to remedy all of that by drinking a lot of beer and smoking SO MUCH pot and more cigarettes than i had smoked during the last week combined. at least i had a very, very fun night partying with all the people i used to live with next to pano's. i got to hang out with at least 10 people during the night and it was fun. i guess everyone's gotta let off some steam sometimes, right?