12/10/03 07:54 - ID#36303

my two voices

i fear i am becoming a nasty mean old witch. winter doth work strange poison. who stole my eye of newt, damn it!

for fabulous listening, try anoushka shankar. she too is the daughter of ravi, in whose past lives was very, very good for being born in this one as music. he has passed on some good lookin genes: see anoushka and her sister, norah jones. heart stopping talent *and* breath stealing beauty. anoushka kicks some ass on that sittar too. ....can i trade dads?

Permalink: my_two_voices.html
Words: 86
Location: Buffalo, NY

12/06/03 12:02 - ID#36302

words words

i really like the word icily, as it is takes a noun and turns it into an adjective. 'she stared at him icily' --with the properties of ice.
oh, and i hate when 'ster' is put on the end of words when it's not supposed to be there. monster is ok, but not jokester, or the nauseating word i heard someone call their kid recently "cutester." ugh.

Permalink: words_words.html
Words: 67
Location: Buffalo, NY

12/02/03 08:06 - ID#36301

reindeer *flying*?!?!

who ever thought up that crazy idea? MUSHROOM TRIPPERS, THAT'S WHO!!!

paul and i were watching this great program on animals who enjoy getting fucked up on various natural substances (except the monkey segment, who were slugging sluggish tourists' forgotten tropical concoctions--unnatural substances but "made with natural flavors" just like froot loops.) and there was a part of this show on a mushroom that grows under the snow way way up north (like by the pole?). anyway i forget the name of the mushroom, flyanonin or flyagogin or something that starts with flya, and the reindeer eat it in fairly large quantities until there's no more. the people who live there eat it too when they can find it and, as the teevee reports (ha) gives them feelings of airy weightlessness. they figured if they were feeling it, the reindeer were too, and began to "hallucinate" the reindeer flying through the air. hence, santa's flying fleet is born in the reveller's phantasmagorical fantasy land, an unknown realm of ice and snow, santa's magical mystery tour.

i bring this up in reference to terry's 'holidazed' as he mentioned that yes there is tradition behind various this n thats and how it's all lost and commercialized. although i learned the above tidbit from the teevee, i really enjoy the fact that flying reindeer are someone's mushroom trip, carrying santa on a trippy journey in a freaky suit, fiddling around other people's houses and eating craploads of cookies. sounds like fun. i'll stop blowing sunshine up everyone's ass now, cause xmas gets me down too, but traditions can be made without buying or buying into all the boolsheeit. i hope. okay, now i'll stop.

Permalink: reindeer_flying_.html
Words: 281
Location: Buffalo, NY

12/02/03 07:30 - ID#36300

a big thank you to

matthew, who showed me the way to a new musical heroine in the beautiful, illustrious miss dolly parton. she is ebullient and warm and she makes me happy.

that is all. sirs and madams.

Permalink: a_big_thank_you_to.html
Words: 34
Location: Buffalo, NY

11/28/03 07:57 - ID#36299

unhappy thanksgiving

yeah, mine was strange. my dad is strange, my mom is strange. my stepdad is morose, my stepmom is on crack. my grandparents are sane and sweet, and so by necessity get trampled by the madness. but lest it seem not so, i am thankful for my family. the whole insane frickin lot of them. they're just so much more fun to be around when not gathered. last week i didn't really want to move far away (flagstaff was our flavor of the week last week) because of my family, now it's like, hey, there's jets, and there's once a year or so, and that's a-ok. hope everyone else had a better day. next year i think i'll go to a shelter or the salvation army, where the inhabitants are much more civil to one another and generally cheerier about life than some members of my family. good grief.

Permalink: unhappy_thanksgiving.html
Words: 149
Location: Buffalo, NY

11/20/03 11:23 - ID#36298

growing by exponenshuls

yay, more peeps. where are the wendies and zacharies so's i don't have to scroll so far down for to see me? biatch! wow biatch and snatch have many similiar letters. if you combine their differences you get bisn. as in bisnitch. bisnatch? snbiatch? i am on to something, yes?

Permalink: growing_by_exponenshuls.html
Words: 50
Location: Buffalo, NY

11/16/03 12:30 - ID#36297

my power animal

"knock it off. a jackelope is fuckin ridiculous. and you know it."

Permalink: my_power_animal.html
Words: 12
Location: Buffalo, NY

11/16/03 12:28 - ID#36296

scaaareee.... in a good way

ooh, so i ended up in niagara falls last night also, paul had a performance in this building we had to find with bad directions, so it was a kind of scavenger hunt. (i have always thought having one on elmwood or allen would be so fun where clues are revealed by spending time in various shops and/or bars. probably bars.)
so yeah, it was in this old high school, which we finally found, but first got lost on the most desolate, abandoned, burned out shells of former streets i have ever seen. it was like a ghost town ghetto. i am rarely scared of neighborhoods but i was truly frightened. we kept going down dead end streets with these ghastly turnarounds.
so we finally get to the old high school, part of which has been converted to artists' galleries/space but the rest empty and desolate.... -- in the lockers were gum wrappers and i love charles and whatnot, binka baby and bugs wuz here class of 92--- exploring places like that is great fun in that what was once a structure in a citadel is now just a mostly purposeless building that a lot of people left something in. it is fascinating to me. someday when we destroy our planet and hence ourselves, this kind of thing will be the anthropological evidence we leave for future(?) humans (or other) to piece together. super fun, huh?

Permalink: scaaareee_in_a_good_way.html
Words: 238
Location: Buffalo, NY

10/25/03 10:54 - ID#36295

the city of buffalo is controlling your

mind.

it is seriously fucked up, this place. it has a hold on people like i have never seen anywhere else in the country, not that i've spent large amounts of time in any one other place but.... people who leave for supposedly greener pastures always end up "coming home" this is fine because i'm in my 'i like it here' phase (right now) but there are times when i hate it here and can't wait to get the fuck out and live in a *real* city. whatever that means.
what really gets my goat tho, is especially if you were raised here, it's ingrained from frickin infancy to think small. anything that might qualify as a 'big dream' seems so impossible. new york and toronto are around the corner, but almost everyone i know has gone to school here (hey, i'm not knocking our fine learning institutions) and wants to stay here and work and live. again, fine, but if you have a dream, it *can* be pursued-- i have a weird theory (hm, it might be from being raised here) that if you can't make it here, you can't make it anywhere. still, maybe it's the beast of burden which is now so shortly upon us, but buffalonians are not people of great expectations. (which i am reading right now, it's a masterpiece i think.) it is a bit sad, and strugglesome.

Permalink: the_city_of_buffalo_is_controlling_your.html
Words: 234
Location: Buffalo, NY

10/19/03 01:40 - ID#36294

memory is strange

a friend was telling me about frustration in the grocery line when , as a strange vu (there are two others besides deja: presque vu (almost seen) is when upon experiencing something, you feel as if you came pretty close to experiencing the same thing previously but can't put a finger on it, and jamais vu (never seen, which is when, upon experiencing something, you know you never have before but can't shake the feeling that yes indeed you *have* (this is the strangest of the vu s to me: those wacky frenchies)) ANYway--a strange vu came over me in that i recalled this time a very long time ago at the grocery line when an old woman struck up a conversation with me about my knitted hat, and what a great time we had, and i later wrote about it in these old fashioned things called notebooks. but how if my friend never mentioned her grocery line experience, or if perchance i never found or read the notebook, i wouldn't have remembered it so in effect, it never really existed. encapsulating things in memory makes it real, and so i have a hard time with the past as i retain details and information of experiences only very vaguely. i can remember the odd smell of the mouthwash my deceased grandmother used much more so than anything she said to me or things we did together. my friend with an incredibly detailed and accurate memory often exclaims "you don't REMEMBER that?!?!?!!??!!!?" but then i find her meticulous cataloguing kind of useless, and a bit lacking in color. she remembers events pretty much how they occur. is this normal? memory to me is like a very old quilt, hand dyed fabric, individually sewn stitches, many varied patches making a pattern. every so often a square that was hidden will reveal itself, and it can bring you to tears, that that's a part of it, but you forgot.

Permalink: memory_is_strange.html
Words: 325
Location: Buffalo, NY

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