My sister took an overdose of pills the other day. My Mama told me about it a few minutes ago. I know my sis is going through a tough time. She's 27, a single mom and she lives with our parents. She just lost her job and her boyfriend. I'm worried but I'm now in Brooklyn. I don't know how I can help even if I were in GA. It scares me to death to imagine this world without my sister. Even if I don't "get" her all the time an even if I don't see her all the time just knowing of her existence helps me and I don't know how I could ever be happy if her existence were terminated.
We all share 80% of DNA with our siblings. It's amazing we can feel sso disconnected sometimes.

Casey got his driver's license today! No more driving his ass around.

Other good things... I'm the Wii golf champion. I have one chin hair. I have a few grey hairs so now I get to dye my hair. Casey is worried about my WOW addiction. I'm now a level 20 Tauren druid named Angline. I figure I'm not that addicted because I still don't understand all the abbreviations. Maybe someone can hook me up with a dictionary for that geek slang.


and the hair dye is in. holy shit this stuff stinks.


We are leaving for Brooklyn on Thursday or Friday. I'll be happy to leave Georgia. I'm fairly certain I'll die in Georgia. My little run in with the law in Athens does nothing to diminish that suspicion. I would rather die that be imprisoned.

Not that we all aren't imprisoned anyway but it's the literal prison that makes me want to rip off my skin and floss my teeth with my veins. At least right now I have some choices.

I choose to dye my hair.
I choose to smoke reds.
I choose to ask Casey how to spell choose and not chose, God Damn it.
I chose not to drink... but I'm reconsidering.
I choose to dye my jeans red.
I choose to wear a bra because in high school I chose not to too often.

Now I choose to quit writing this pointless entry and get back to my editing... or rinse my hair.

I'll leave y'all with my favorite Atlanta bathroom graffiti even though it don't make sense now (unless you have trouble parting from you laptop even for a moment)

"If you are reading this that mean you are probably taking some sort of dump or pee...
Yeah, have fun with that, uhhh"


I made a yellow wallpaper video last night. I'm not trying to say Casey is driving my nuts but I do go a little nuts sometimes. It's best to get it out in an imaginative and harmless way. It has been a while since I've had to comprimis so much.

Last Friday my sister found a little puppy at the end of the driveway. There is no way they could keep it and I didn't want them to. My sister is bad about bringing home animals and not taking proper care of them. She'll feed them and everything but some animals need allot more. This little puppy needed a trip to the vet to see if he had worms. He also needed constant attention and affection.
After spending the night on the couch beside the puppy (I made him a bed out of a basket and my childhood teddy bear) I decided to post an ad on craigslist and find him a good home. I made this video to go with the ad .
By the Saturday night I'd gotten about six responses. My little niece Lea was having a birthday party and after that I was going to head for Atlanta.
Lea just turned 2 years old. When we all gathered around and sang her happy birthday she got all freaked out. Halfway through the song Lea folded her little arms, placed her head in them and started crying. Her Mama turned on the lights really fast and got her distracted with blowing out the candles. D, Lea's mama made the best chocolate cake. ummmm
After that my Dad and me went out and got the puppy. We brought him to D's house and all the kids went nuts over him. D's sister, Amy volunteered to puppysit and today when I called Amy she say's that she's talked it over with her husband and they've decided to keep the puppy. I couldn't be happier than I am now, knowing that the sweet little puppy is in a safe and loving home.

other arms reach out to me,
but still in not so peaceful dreams I see,
this place will surely kill me,
ee ee
oh!

The police ain't nice around these parts. Fuck Athens.
I'm officially an addict. The World of Warcraft has locked it's evil grip around my weak little mind. I mean my strong all powerful druid mind. I can't seem to stick with a character for long...
I wish somebody would play with me.
ah, beautiful escapism.

I just woke up from a nap. I had a weird dream where (e:paul) made an appearance. This is what went down.
I was hanging around with the family eating dinner. My Dad and I had a big serving. It was good. Two guests who were there wanted more. We ate something with red sauce.
Then I was running and climbing around alleys with around 3 or 4 friends. We were young people up to mischief. We encountered this man who got really mad at us and locked us in his moderately priced thrift store... forever.
The other girl and me broke down a door and made a run for it at dawn. Upon venturing into the morning sunlight, I felt nauseous and weak in the legs. My skin started turning pale pink, like the sky. We had to go back inside of the store to feel better. That man had put some sorta hex on us.
So we were in the thrift store. It's weird that the clerks didn't realize something funny was happening... maybe everyone was hexed in that store. One clerk asked me out after I'd been there for a year.
I was walking around the store one time and found this T-shirt that had a picture of president Ronald Regan shaking hands with MLK Jr. The two were circled by text that said "same values." I thought that was some crazy shit so I picked the shirt up. Then I ran into (e:paul). I gave him this look with my eyes that begged him to ask me where I'd been and why I hadn't been writing and so on... but (e:paul) was his regular old self. I even gave him the Regan/MLK t-shirt before he left.
After (e:paul) left one of the store clerks came up and told me I had to pay for the clothes I was wearing. I looked in my purse but the clothes cost 18 dollars and I felt like that was too much when compared to the money in my purse. I then took off the clothes and walked around the store in my panties and bra. (It wasn't the typical shame shame public nudity dream. I was mad.) The clerk went off to get the police and I thought "good, maybe they'll get me out of here" but in a few minutes the clerk was back like nothing had happened. Then I saw this (the older) Robert De Niro looking man checking out my ass and realized that he was probably the man who made the hex. I'm pretty sure he fancied me.



Ok, that's what I remember from that dream. Happy New Year everyone. I'm in a condo in Downtown Atlanta with Casey. He's trying to get this mattress up here and it's pouring outside. I guess I'm going to go dress up. If I need to spend my new year's eve in from on a TV watching football, I'm going to do it in style! (and get drunk)

sorry for taking off in a hurry Paul Matt and Terry. Our acclimated southern bones couldn't handle the buffalo chill... also our two fat asses in that twin bed was a tough squeeze. I'll come back and stay longer sometime cause it was good to see y'all for that brief period of time. I'll try coming on a weekend next time. The mansion is super. I think y'all should act out some role-playing S&M fantasies up in the attic cage.
I made a shitty video for the dysfunctional holiday show at Squeaky. I made it in two hours (edit, compress, burn) and it shows. Here is a link . I had to use footage already logged due to my lack of a firewire. My video was the worst in the show. The screening was short. Milbrand made an awesome sock puppet epic about the Christmas serpent. And the Kimberly person made one of her finest 3-d things that involved Santa getting a hooker with help from "a furry" the Easter bunny.
Here are a couple pics of me, Casey and the Milbrand Santa.

I'm heading for Buffalo in a few hours. It's a 7 hour drive and I hope to see some of y'all peeps out at the pink tonight. Unfortunately I don't think we can stick around long egough for Enknot's Birthday party :(. I hope I can at least show Casey a little taste of Buffalo insanity. We're going to stay with the baby-bellied Soy bean, if the cat hair doesn't drive us out. So the old pink and Korea House, those are the things I need to show Casey, that and a shitload of fantastic people.
Dang. I'm too excited to sleep. That and my menstrual cramps. Damn the full moon. (note to Terry: please don't let my menstruation freak you out. I promise to be on typical robin behavior)

We had dinner with the Lavatelli sister's earlier and I realized how lucky I was they took me in last July. Buffalo breeds good people and good friends.

tonight I went to my first strip club (I've been to the claremont lounge but that place is in a league of its own) the pink pony is a real strip joint equipped with at least 20 fine looking women. I was suckered into a couple lap dances from a hot young Gypsy named Bianca. she was one of the few with real tits. i got to feel my first fake tits. they belonged to a tall and stacked woman named Mimi. all in all it was a good night, good food at Dante's (wasn't it the 2nd level of lustful hell I'm doomed to?) on the pirate ship then on to stripper hell/heaven whatever. I'm a bit inebriated so I'll sign off now.

When I'm all down on myself you're there but when I ask bout sumptin kinda happy it's like.... where is everybody? Regardless I still miss you damn yankees, and who knows hodown, I may be coming your way... maybe. I'm about to make another video... one i promised an organization. It in memory of an action figure... Bruce. I lost him in Portland

PS
did anybody watch the maypop video? look at the little title opener i made for it.

Dagblastit
by Casey McKinney

Hung almost 5 times before bothering
to get to know you. I tend to avoid
looking at the work of people I dig.
So often the shit sucks (then there you are).
But as I told Ben today, I'm perplexed,
because the mix you have is just too much:
Country yet modern. Weird yet not crazy.
Pretty, but thankfully are not perfect.
Spent a year trying hard to gigolo,
not get snagged, sucked in, or whipped as they say,
but damnit, think you've done it. Another
Georgian too. What's up with that? Peaches
of death will grab my one good testicle.
They'll squeeze too and laugh - that's what I figure.


Sounds about right... but I can't be objective. What do you (e:strip)pers think? Does this poem stand on its on? and what's up with the not perfect? hah, I've been watching Dr. 90210 so I know quests for physical perfection are serious concerns for many folks. Some of those folks are nuts. This woman on there today wanted to have a big old diamond placed right under her skin on her arm, this on account of the fact she'd become more active and couldn't wear it all the time. Reminds me of Egyptian Pharaohs gettin' buried with all their things when they die. Somehow the burial before death seems worse. The doctor wouldn't do it so the woman just had some cellulite dug up with metal sticks. crazy.
here's a link to more of Casey's poetry. I don't like poetry an awful lot but Casey knows that.