i want one so badly, but i don't think i'm going to get one.
you would think my mother would understand what a tough time i'm going though and she'd be thoughtful right? wrong.
where is (e:hodown) when you need her? oh yea, she's off in nyc working my dream job.
i also woke up feeling kind of sick.
i am considering getting my own basket... i also would like to color eggs. i feel like no one cares about holidays when there are no childers around. I am an adult child, who needs to be treated like a child.
where is the baby when you need her?
on another note, i can't believe the semester is almost over. i also can't believe that i have done surprisingly well considering the insane amounts of work i was required to do, while working f/t.
i am currently doing some evaluation of my life, and i think i need to cut back on work and luxury in favor of maintaining my health and sanity. i need to learn how to just relax... i feel like i have the need to fill up every second of the day with something and it's making me crazy...
the things i can't discuss are still going on, but i feel more prepared to cope with them now... plus i'm being very proactive about taking care of myself!
happy easter peeps!
Lilho's Journal
My Podcast Link
04/23/2011 11:42 #54137
easter basket04/19/2011 10:16 #54095
A reason I love BuffaloI love Buffalo because now that I no longer live there I can go and just be a visitor. Right now, I would love to visit and see my family and friends because I swear I'm about to peace out on AZ for good.
This semester has basically been one giant bundle of stress and confusion and the past two weeks have basically sent me over the edge. I'm dealing with so many things right now, most of which I can't really talk about and the last time I even felt close to this alone was probably before I left Buffalo.
The hardest part is trying to smile and put on a happy face for school and my internship. I guess I always look fine but on the inside I am really hurting. I am currently facing two situations that are bigger than anything I've ever had to deal with and I'm so lost...
I'm supposed to go to the Nicki Minaj concert tonight and I love her, but I honestly don't even want to go. I just want to stay home and have dinner with my family. I just want to be around my mom because she is the only person I can talk to right now.
She is telling me to be a fighter, and she's right but I feel like I don't have the strength.
The really sad part is, while Buffalo is the one thing that would definitely cure my sadness, I don't think I can visit for a while.
This semester has basically been one giant bundle of stress and confusion and the past two weeks have basically sent me over the edge. I'm dealing with so many things right now, most of which I can't really talk about and the last time I even felt close to this alone was probably before I left Buffalo.
The hardest part is trying to smile and put on a happy face for school and my internship. I guess I always look fine but on the inside I am really hurting. I am currently facing two situations that are bigger than anything I've ever had to deal with and I'm so lost...
I'm supposed to go to the Nicki Minaj concert tonight and I love her, but I honestly don't even want to go. I just want to stay home and have dinner with my family. I just want to be around my mom because she is the only person I can talk to right now.
She is telling me to be a fighter, and she's right but I feel like I don't have the strength.
The really sad part is, while Buffalo is the one thing that would definitely cure my sadness, I don't think I can visit for a while.
tinypliny - 04/19/11 17:04
Good luck! Sending out good vibes in your direction!!!
Good luck! Sending out good vibes in your direction!!!
flacidness - 04/19/11 16:49
Awe I'm sorry youre feeling this way honey. Stay strong sweetheart and know that whatever bad time you're going through right now, it's only a moment and it will pass. I miss Buffalo too!! I'm actually moving back in a couple weeks and im extremely happy about. As far as the concert girl go!!! I'm going to see her in july. She's the shit yo. Its MARTHA grrrr!!!
Awe I'm sorry youre feeling this way honey. Stay strong sweetheart and know that whatever bad time you're going through right now, it's only a moment and it will pass. I miss Buffalo too!! I'm actually moving back in a couple weeks and im extremely happy about. As far as the concert girl go!!! I'm going to see her in july. She's the shit yo. Its MARTHA grrrr!!!
03/12/2011 10:44 #53811
for JoshWhen my sister called to tell me the news I was pretty floored. I didn't have a lot to say...
And then I cried for a while because it just made me so sad and every time I think about Josh the tears come back.
Josh you were truly a great guy, someone who I genuinely had respect for and always smiled when I thought about you.
I am not even sure when I saw you last and I find myself really regretting not staying in touch because now there isn't another chance to have a beer or dinner party or run into you on elmwood.
The memories I have of you are all happy so I will hold on to that... I remember having a dinner party for you and Jason at pauls's house and I made gumbo and my sister and I mixed up some champagne cocktails. Its probably one of my favorite buffalo memories. We all had a great time and you were so gracious, you and Jason both. You were always singing praises for my sister and I, and it was nice to know a pair of siblings who shared such a strong connection.
My sister is my best friend, as Jason was yours. My heart goes out to you Jason, and although I'm far away I will always be here for you as a friend. :o)
My mom tells me that it is better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all... I will remember Josh and like my sister said, Josh you will hold a special place in my heart.
And then I cried for a while because it just made me so sad and every time I think about Josh the tears come back.
Josh you were truly a great guy, someone who I genuinely had respect for and always smiled when I thought about you.
I am not even sure when I saw you last and I find myself really regretting not staying in touch because now there isn't another chance to have a beer or dinner party or run into you on elmwood.
The memories I have of you are all happy so I will hold on to that... I remember having a dinner party for you and Jason at pauls's house and I made gumbo and my sister and I mixed up some champagne cocktails. Its probably one of my favorite buffalo memories. We all had a great time and you were so gracious, you and Jason both. You were always singing praises for my sister and I, and it was nice to know a pair of siblings who shared such a strong connection.
My sister is my best friend, as Jason was yours. My heart goes out to you Jason, and although I'm far away I will always be here for you as a friend. :o)
My mom tells me that it is better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all... I will remember Josh and like my sister said, Josh you will hold a special place in my heart.
02/23/2011 11:45 #53693
haikuMy sister is
The ultimate Grand Puba
I'm still scared of her
In my writing assessment class we are doing a poetry unit and to be quite honest I'm no fan of poetry.
Anywho... I really have decided to DC my blog because its causing problems and I might start to use figment and write there or not at all.
The main reason I blog is for Paul, so we can keep in touch but ill just skype with him or call him or get him out here! Anyway, I don't care what people think of what I say however things other people say and do here aren't PG and that's what concerns my future career which I refuse to take any chances with. :o(
And I admit I love the drama. But ill keep it to watching and commenting on real housewives from now on since my life is already to full to handle any extra blah.
The ultimate Grand Puba
I'm still scared of her
In my writing assessment class we are doing a poetry unit and to be quite honest I'm no fan of poetry.
Anywho... I really have decided to DC my blog because its causing problems and I might start to use figment and write there or not at all.
The main reason I blog is for Paul, so we can keep in touch but ill just skype with him or call him or get him out here! Anyway, I don't care what people think of what I say however things other people say and do here aren't PG and that's what concerns my future career which I refuse to take any chances with. :o(
And I admit I love the drama. But ill keep it to watching and commenting on real housewives from now on since my life is already to full to handle any extra blah.
paul - 02/24/11 00:12
Have you checked recently, nothing even comes up under your name anymore since jess's journals went away. You were effectively erase from the internet anyways.
Have you checked recently, nothing even comes up under your name anymore since jess's journals went away. You were effectively erase from the internet anyways.
lilho - 02/23/11 23:30
well that's just cruel, and i don't recall you having photos of me creeper!
can you get the bunny suite? zooey loves it....
and the haiku isn't even right format. again the dislike of poetry.
well that's just cruel, and i don't recall you having photos of me creeper!
can you get the bunny suite? zooey loves it....
and the haiku isn't even right format. again the dislike of poetry.
libertad - 02/23/11 13:30
I like your journal. Just because you leave it doesn't mean we all can't post your name and scandalous photos of you in our own journals. I wouldn't do it, I'm just sayin we could. Aren't your problems mostly coming from other people's journals anyways? At least with your own journal you can control the content.
I like your journal. Just because you leave it doesn't mean we all can't post your name and scandalous photos of you in our own journals. I wouldn't do it, I'm just sayin we could. Aren't your problems mostly coming from other people's journals anyways? At least with your own journal you can control the content.
02/22/2011 12:04 #53683
end of the blogWas asked why I blog... Don't have a concrete definition.
I knew it had to come to end at some point but I'm a professional program where they have been stressing all semester to be careful with you put online.
Wasn't so careful in the past so I hired a company to clean up my act. It isn't so much my blog but others here I'm concerned about, controversial topics and all that ultimately affect my image as a teacher and while is isn't fair. It is what it is.
My laptop is being Le crap and my car needs $700 of work. Go tax return. No more splurging, just back to work and school and trying to not be a fool.
Assignments and tests galore and my bed beckons but alas I must plow through. Also my internship teacher is kinda not so good with the communication and I think she's upset with me...oh well I always call and can't get ahold of her.
Going to the zoo Friday should be fun!
I knew it had to come to end at some point but I'm a professional program where they have been stressing all semester to be careful with you put online.
Wasn't so careful in the past so I hired a company to clean up my act. It isn't so much my blog but others here I'm concerned about, controversial topics and all that ultimately affect my image as a teacher and while is isn't fair. It is what it is.
My laptop is being Le crap and my car needs $700 of work. Go tax return. No more splurging, just back to work and school and trying to not be a fool.
Assignments and tests galore and my bed beckons but alas I must plow through. Also my internship teacher is kinda not so good with the communication and I think she's upset with me...oh well I always call and can't get ahold of her.
Going to the zoo Friday should be fun!
mike - 02/24/11 23:51
While going through my old photos , I'm thinking wow I'm glad I didn't have a camera/internet phone then, I'm sure so much more inappropriateness of us would be out in the internet world...
While going through my old photos , I'm thinking wow I'm glad I didn't have a camera/internet phone then, I'm sure so much more inappropriateness of us would be out in the internet world...
tinypliny - 02/22/11 15:47
And I don't really see why any responsible employer will trust random online information over an in-person interview and the inherent personality and sincerity-assessments and written recommendations that go along with the interview process. If I were hiring a teacher for my kid, I would trust my instincts and workplace recommendations infinitely more than trawling through the net looking for dirt on people. Think about it - you are who you are, you can't change it. Why not shape your future the way you want to instead of worrying so much about what may or may not be your past and your perception of what other people might or might not think about this past?
And I don't really see why any responsible employer will trust random online information over an in-person interview and the inherent personality and sincerity-assessments and written recommendations that go along with the interview process. If I were hiring a teacher for my kid, I would trust my instincts and workplace recommendations infinitely more than trawling through the net looking for dirt on people. Think about it - you are who you are, you can't change it. Why not shape your future the way you want to instead of worrying so much about what may or may not be your past and your perception of what other people might or might not think about this past?
tinypliny - 02/22/11 15:43
I agree with (e:paul). I have very little faith in what these "clean-up" companies can do. Just start writing about what you want to do and define your goals in your new blog - you can achieve a better online presence in 6 months than what these bogus companies can do for you.
I agree with (e:paul). I have very little faith in what these "clean-up" companies can do. Just start writing about what you want to do and define your goals in your new blog - you can achieve a better online presence in 6 months than what these bogus companies can do for you.
paul - 02/22/11 14:33
You are totally wasting your money. All you need to do is start a bunch of wordpress or blogger blogs using your real name. In those blogs talk about topics relevant to your career field. In the end you will have an online presence that helps you get a job instead of just "protecting" you from not getting one.
The company you hired is just going to make spam sites about you to do the same thing. If I had a job applicant with a fake cleaned up spam filled past I would hire them even less.
You are totally wasting your money. All you need to do is start a bunch of wordpress or blogger blogs using your real name. In those blogs talk about topics relevant to your career field. In the end you will have an online presence that helps you get a job instead of just "protecting" you from not getting one.
The company you hired is just going to make spam sites about you to do the same thing. If I had a job applicant with a fake cleaned up spam filled past I would hire them even less.
Yes, you need to have babies before your eggs expire.
(e:matthew) dyed eggs. Maybe its time to start having babies before you are too old like me and its too late.