I'm like a bad episode of Sinefeld. What is wrong with me?

1. Sometimes I dream that I am in love with someone who I don't have feelings for and end up liking them because of it.

2. I rarely wear deodorant.

3. I don't shave and use that as a deterrent for drunken sex. I refuse to look gross no matter how drunk I am, therefore I won't accidentally have sex when I'm wasted.

4. I skipped kindergarten and went straight from preschool to first grade.

5. When dating someone, I always have to wear matching bra and panties.

6. I hate getting my nails done more than anything in the world.

7. I love strippers and strip clubs.

8. When I was a baby, the doctors told my parents that I would be deaf and that a change of climate would be the only thing that would help my chronic ear infections since antibiotics were no longer working.

9. I used government issued food ration cards for a good part of my childhood, while living in communist Poland. There was never enough food.

10. The first time I saw a black person was when I was 9.

11. I wake up my daughter with kisses and hugs every day for the past 15 years because I hated when my mother would yell and scream at me to wake up.

12. I will be 34 when my daughter starts college.

13. All of my bed sheets, blankets, duvet coves, bed skirts, etc. have to match.

14. I only use down pillows.

15. I cannot stand men who cannot eat properly with a knife and fork. ( knife in right hand, fork in left and never putting down the knife)

16. I could never be in a relationship with someone who is a picky eater.

17. I wish I'd like to smoke weed.

18. I don't listen to music because it makes me too emotional.

19. I believe I will never get married because I don't want to work hard to make a relationships work.

20. I like my boobs more and more the older I get.

21. My second toe is my longest toe.

22. I was a flight attendant for 3 years, but I kept my free flight privileges for 9 years and used them wisely.

23. I drink evaporated milk out of the can. Often.

24. I dated a music producer that has worked with Madonna, Prince, Mariah Carey, Paris Hilton, and many more that I can't remember now.

25. My ex girlfriend was the best boyfriend I've ever had.

26.(bonus) During the summer I often forget to wear panties.

This woman really is THE most beautiful woman on earth. Seriously look at her, it's perfection.

Plus she's loaded. She's the face of L'Oreal, Coca Cola and DeBeers Diamonds and the #1 box office star in the world. Bollywood films reach about 5 billion people world wide, twice that of Hollywood. She grabs about 15 million a film and she's got about 40 of them.

Ummm....I was just thinking...maybe I should write a normal post about what's going on in my life instead of the usual "look at this" or "did you know about that" kinds of posts that I usually write.

So....what's new in my life. Well....not much. I am still unemployed, mostly because I haven't been looking for a job...AT ALL! (I applied for one, which ended up being filled by the person they interviewed before I applied, FYI...Paul, Alex and Tony). With as much time and energy that I put into my last job, I figure a few months off for myself is well deserved and I don't feel a tinge of guilt about it.

I did decide that I'm going to take some classes this semester, so I will not be looking for a job until that is over, in May. I'll live off of student loans. (what's another 10K when you're drowning in school debt already?). Maybe we'll get a bail out somewhere down the road in 15 years or maybe I'll disappear to Europe and never return. Can they track me abroad if I am not using my American passport and hold a foreign citizenship?

I did get an email from the pharmaceutical staffing firm that I've been working with in London, about a job in Switzerland that they thought I'd be a good candidate for. So I went ahead and applied for that. They said that the company is willing to pay for relocation, which is rare, but it is only a 6 month contract so that kind of sucks. They do, however, say that if you end up doing a good job, the company often offers such employees permanent positions. You can't imagine how different shit is in the European workplace. The perks you get for a mid level management position (like the kind I would hold as a Project Manager) are things like a company car, relocation pay (which seems kind of crazy considering this is only a 6 month term) and many others that I don't remember now.

But imagine what kind of position you have to hold here in order to be issued a company car. You have to be pretty high on the power list to be able to get perks like that. There, it's a standard benefit for a lot of management positions. So, anyway, the Switzerland job is a long shot, but I'd be retarded to not apply. But I'm sure there must be a shit load of people applying as well.

Other than that, I pretty much don't have a whole lot going on. I am buying and reading books like crazy and am still on the whole Soviet Union, Stalin, WWII, Nazi, kick. One of the books I'm currently reading (theres about 4) is the biography of Joseph Stalin (based on new documents discovered in the previously forbidden archives of the Russian government). He was pretty much a criminal his entire life, starting from the point after he left seminary school. (Yes, Stalin was going to be a priest!) He was arrested and exiled 7 times, before Lenin came to power and gave Stalin an official position in government. Prior to that, he murdered opponents of the revolution that Lenin and their party members, the Bolsheviks, were trying to incite. He robbed caravans for money and gold, organized violent and deadly demonstrations denouncing the leaders in power, printed and distributed prohibited propaganda, fathered bastard children that he refused to acknowledge, and double crossed everyone he came into contact with (including Lenin, who he originally worshiped and who was the reason he joined the party in the first place). He worked for the police as an informant but was actually a double agent with the approval and encouragement of Lenin. He blew in party members that Lenin though were disposable and not vital to the party's success, so that they could reap the benefits that being an informant receives when working for the police. Prime example would be the kind of punishments Stalin got each time he was arrested. Instead of receiving a long prison sentence or a death sentence, he was always given exile (and at times they even gave him the choice of where he wanted to be exiled to!), even though out of the 7 times he was exiled, he escaped 6 times. You'd think they would have learned a lesson the second or third time, but archival records of correspondence within the police department clearly showed that they were well aware of his planned escapes, but decided to look the other way, hoping he could lead them to other, bigger, fish they could fry.

I also finished a book on Auschwitz; how it came into existance, why, and how it morphed into a death camp from a labor camp. Initially, Auschwitz was to be a labor camp that would use Jews to produce materials needed for the war. A little known fact is that the Nazi's had two different kinds of camps they built during the war; labor camps and death camps. Auschwitz was an oddity because it was used as both. There were other camps built, that were much smaller, yet much deadlier, but they were created to be nothing but extermination centers. They had no barracks, no buildings, no cafeteria or offices, just gas chambers and incinirators for buringing the bodies.

One of the most disturbing facts I learned was how skilled they became at using psychology as a means to control the prisoners and how convincing and effective they were at it. Because sending screaming, fighting, crying men, women and children to their death was proving to cause quite a few psychological issues for the guards, they developed ways in which the killing process became easy and impersonal (meaning guards had very little contact with the prisoners before killing them and did not have to force them into the chambers). They developed gas chambers as a means to solve the issues they were having with shooting prisoners each night. It took too long, there were way too many people that had to be killed and not enough guards to do it, and they were running out of room for disposing bodies. Having to shoot 100 people a night and constantly hearing them plead and beg for their life was much more difficult for the guards than having 1000, calmly walk into a building that they thought housed showers; shower's that they most likely wanted and needed after a grueling trip to the camp.

After arriving to the camp and exiting the train, the guards, depending on which year of the war it was, would either take all of them to be killed or would select the one's that were ill, old or too young to work. They had a senior guard that was calm and cordial and who talked to the prisoners in a warm, reassuring tone upon their arrival, to put them at ease and prevent mass panic and hysteria. He would explain to them, calmly and warmly, that they just needed to be cleaned and disinfected prior to entering the camp; nothing to worry about. He kindly asked people to take off their clothes and to fold them up neatly, so that when they got out there would be no trouble in finding their belongings. He explained that after showering, they would be assigned their barracks and soon afterwards, their future jobs, which would be based on the skills they each possessed from previous employment. Thus, upon entering the death chambers (which were actually built to look like showers inside), no one panicked or cried or pleaded or resisted. This saved the guards a lot of unnecessary energy expenditure and prevented the psychological problems they so often developed as a result of a, (however small) conscience and feelings of guilt. The only problem that remained, was that once people were inside, the doors were locked and they realized that no water was coming out of the shower heads but instead it was gas from the cyanide pellets that were dropped from above, the screaming, crying and pleading began and could be heard through the walls and throughout the camp. This was not only a problem for the guards, but also for the other prisoners that were still laborers, who refused to buy the shower story when their turn came around to be gassed.


Ok, it looks like I got side tracked once again and made the kind of post I was intending on not doing.

Now I'm too lazy and tired to talk about other stuff that has been going on, so I'll have to leave it for next time.

this chick is brilliant

who else could sing a song like poker face with only a piano?