Because this is the sort of mindless thing that makes our culture famous -

Ninja Cat Very famous video from this year, with Hitchcockian sound added. The cat moves... but doesn't move... sneaky little freak!



Idiot Cat Mistakes Himself for Enemy, Dives Headfirst Into Mirror Self-explanatory.

Today I was thinking about some of the cities where I felt were the most dangerous I've visited... a perception vs. reality study, if you will. Count Buffalo in the mix, by the way. This data comes off of Wiki's crime stats page - it should be noted that the crime stats are voluntarily reported, which is to say that they are likely higher than what is reported.

Based on federal data from calendar year 2007, per 100,000 residents:

Buffalo, NY - Population 273,832 (66th among large US cities)

Violent Crime - 15th (comparable to DC - Chicago didn't report data on violent crime!)
Property Crime - 20th (comparable city of disrepute - Oakland, CA)
Murder/Negligent Manslaughter - 10th (higher than Miami, Chicago, Memphis)
Forcible Rape - 17th
Robbery - 15th (in between Dallas and Chicago)
20th - Aggravated Assault (higher than Chicago, DC)
14th - Burglary
11th - Larceny-theft
32nd - Motor Vehicle Theft (more profitable in better weather)
26th - Arson

Buffalo outranked Boston, Newark, NYC, Chicago, Houston and Los Angeles in every crime category except for the following: Boston (aggravated assault, 13th), Newark (murder and auto theft, both 4th), Houston (auto theft 24th, arson 21st).

That's right - Newark, NJ - regularly considered the armpit of the east and one of the most latently dangerous cities in America, is reported to have 30% less violent crime, 60% less rapes, 25% less robberies, 30% less aggravated assaults, 30% less property crime, almost 3x less burglaries and half the larceny than what we have in Buffalo. Don't worry though - you are "only" twice as likely to get murdered in Newark, and are twice as likely to have your ride "borrowed" for a while. So, in my final estimation, either Buffalo is significantly more dangerous than Newark, NJ and the biggest cities in America (per 100,000) or the stats volunteered by the cities are downplayed to a criminal degree.

Don't forget - as a policy our city doesn't inform its citizens on a regular basis when crimes occur in your area unless they feel like it. And by your area I mean down the block. Cheers! *clink* (and no, the clink might not have been your window being cut by a glass cutter)

Remember all this the next time the city spends your tax dollars on stuff like $50,000 cameras, which have yielded no tangible improvement on your safety, but make you "feel better" depending on the neighborhood you are in. And I'll be the last guy to complain about pay for cops, but in the past year we've had a cop "allegedly" try to defraud our car insurer, and looking at the crime statistics you are DAMN RIGHT that they should be held to scrutiny. If you want to cry about what you're being paid, then you are god damn right that I want to see what it is that you're doing to justify those tears.

Here is the question - based on the crime stats (and stats aren't everything until its you that gets hurt) is the tax money you are shelling out for often grandiose police salaries and benefits worth what it is that you are getting back in terms of public safety? The answer is no. In the end is all proportional but when New York and LA's proportional crime rate is lower than yours in Buffalo, something is wrong and it isn't the way the stats are being tabulated.

(e:peeps) -

Here I am, sitting at my father's computer, doing various things I shouldn't while relaying to you my innermost insecurities and most vulgar carnal desires. Well, okay... maybe I'm not relaying to you any insecurities or vulgar thoughts, but I am sitting here at my father's computer writing a paragraph to you that is short on meaning and long on bullshit. So here goes -

We came home for Christmas Eve and had a lovely time, then came back to Buffalo (shopping and cleaning) while (e:jasontheunfuck)inglucky worked for "el hombre." After all that, we came back home to honor a promise to our family to hang out for a bit. Today was mainly errand running for me - I went to the Lakewood Weg three different times, then took (e:grandma) (she has her own screenname now, apparently) to the salon.

Today we once again visited the Southern Tier pub with (e:dad), got some stuff, drank, then went to get some fried food at the Puzzle Lounge. Their wings and fingers are as good as I've had anywhere and I probably shouldn't have been so obviously savoring it while pretty girls were in the house.

On Friday I went to the mall. Whoa... I hate that place. I really dislike shopping there... every time I found something I would wear I thought "Oh wow, isn't that nice, now I can officially look like every other dude in Buffalo." I'm happier at the Army/Navy surplus, I swear. I found a light jacket to wear that would be cool with collared shirt and jeans then thought, "once again, now I can look like every other dude in Buffalo, but only when they try to dress up and hang out on my street." What I really wanted was an indigo colored, long sleeve shirt with epaulets and some pockets and instead I got an dark blue colored designer shirt made of material that felt vaguely like a parachute or a tent. I am easily bored with clothes and dislike shopping because I never am happy with the outcome. The only thing I can pull off spectacularly is a suit and generally I am emblematic of a boho/military/slacker motif centered around jeans, birks (weather appropriate), long sleeve shirts, earth tones, cargo shorts and sunglasses to hide my prying eyes that do pry.

I wonder if Michael Jackson just dresses up weirdly because he's bored like I am.

My dad's friend has a cool little chihuahua named Spooky, who was ironically spooked out at (e:jay) and I. Poor thing was shaking like a leaf and tried to bite me, so I gave him a Beggin' Strip (dad, well prepared) and he was my homie4lyfe thereafter. I stared in his eyes and I think he raised his eyebrow at me, like "fancy a go? Want to square a go mate?"

What I'm doing at work today -



Is it better to be a star on a losing team or a backup on a winning team? I like to think that I'm a star whether or not I win or lose - after all, that is what the public school system taught me!

Merry Christmas everybody -

Your friend Josh

How sad and lonely our city looks today. Looking out of my front window down Cleveland the trees seem like soldiers standing in formation in the middle of a snow field. The snow is blowing sideways, acting like a veil. The sky is the same faint color of the road, a familiar sight to anybody who has lived in the north.

At Spot there are two men sitting outside on the patio, drinking coffee with coats bundled to the chin. What crazy and hardy people live here... go inside, you fools! How long does coffee stay warm, let alone hot, when it is in a paper cup and the temperature is 20F?

The usual suspects (SUVs, "suburban utility vehicles") are parking illegally in order to avoid the severe aches and pains of walking an extra 20 feet in the middle of a snow storm - not that they have ever needed an excuse.

I can only hear the sound of a shovel scraping against the cement sidewalk in front of Wasabi, the hum of a CPU fan, the slight ringing in my ears, cars slushing by here and there with engines growling spinning their wheels across the white road, Jean talking to someone only she can see, the occasional honking horn. The city is quiet and inactive today.