I am absolutely convinced that student loans are evil and the NYSHESC is the devil incarnate. I hate them and I am solemnly vowing that I WILL NOT PUT MY CHILDREN THROUGH WHAT I HAVE BEEN GOING THROUGH! Is that strong enough of a resolve? Also, I must look for grants for grad. school because I really don't want to take on another $25,000.00 in debt, bringing the grand total up to about $50,000.00. Just that number scares the hell out of me. But it's all supposed to be worth it, right? Forgive my skepticism.

Not a big, "OW!", just a little "Ow." Okay, after my marathon spray primer-ing/ spray painting session yesterday evening, now my right forearm is killing me! Yesterday, I had trigger finger going on. My finger didn't want to bend, even to curl around the spoon so I could eat my Rocky Road ice cream! Today, my forearm feels like it's one of Popeye's! Decidedly not cool. Especially as I have to do the same thing all over again except worse because it's my dresser. *Groan!* I am such a freak.

So today's task of the day, despite being 93 degrees and high humidity, was to sand, prime and paint the cedar chest that I inherited from my grandmother. Usually, I am totally averse to painting wood, but I had to do *something* with it! and this was just the easiest way to deal with the problem. It's done. Not perfect but what the hell. It's too hot to care, really. Project number 2 is repeat the same process with my dresser for pretty much the same reason as the cedar chest. Now, however, that I have primed and painted the chest, I have paint up my nose! That's what I get for taking the easy way and spray painting rather than doing it the old fashioned way. It's not particularly nice feeling nor particularly healthy, I'm sure. Oh well. I really should keep packing but I just can't be bothered! Ciao fair E-Peeps. Time to clean myself up as I must go to work tomorrow. I really hate work. The only good thing about it, quite frankly, is the air conditioning. Does that make me an air conditioning whore? Hmmmmm.... Something to ponder at least.

Packing Sucks! So I've been meaning to do it and I finally began. In fits and starts, I started to pack up my myriad of things and organize and throw out things that I don't really want to throw out. I am a very messy person. It's a strange dichotomy of longing to be organized and clutter free in a very cluttered space because I hold onto things for sentimental or sometimes just plain crazy reasons! A perfect example of this would be my three and half feet tall and about three and a half feet long stuffed Dinosaur. Yes, it is a very large stuffed animal and it takes up a lot of space but I keep fighting getting rid of it because- ready for this- I wanted to have it for when I have kids. Is that not the most retarded reason of all time to hang onto an oversized stuffed dinosaur? Now, I won it when I worked at the Disney Store, which I worked at for 7 years, so I have more Disney crap than any one person has a right to own, not to mention a Winnie the Pooh tatoo on my ankle. (Bet you guys never saw that one coming, now did you?) Anyway, I am notoriously unlucky so that fact that I won it was miraculous and although the kittens love playing with it, I am afraid that the dinosaur needs to go. It kind of feels good actually, to purge. But man, am I freaking exhausted and I am no where near anything to looking like I'm remotely close to being finished. Did that sentence just make any sense? I have to go and deal witha mountain of clothing that currently is covering my bed. Too much stuff! Why oh why do I have to hang onto so much crap!? Note to self- I don't need anything else! Except for those new Vic's Secret bras I bought yesterday. Those I definitely needed! :)

Is there anything better than Victoria's Secret Semi- Annual Sale? I don't think so! ;)

Bank Crush is back from Spain! Yee Haa! And I totally impressed my co-workers with my smoothness as I flirted up a storm! Damn but that boy is fine!

Today, I am one draggin' ass woman! I was home by 1:30 and in bed by 2 and up this morning at 10 to 7. Not too shabby. I am rather tired but last night at the Pink was totally worth it!

It's funny to me how we know so many details about each others' lives but have not actually met. Ajay has left and it was at his going away event that I met him for the first time and that was to say goodbye. Does that make any sense? I don't know about the rest of you, but I think what we really need is an E-Peeps Karaoke Night! Let's get smashed and all sing really badly to Abba and old Beatles tunes! We can make score signs and hold them up after every performance! We totally should!

Adieu for now, sweet peeps.

Is there anything better than coming home from a walk and finding your mother in a panic because the phone isn't working and your father is MIA? In fact he had gone to the hospital at around 11:30AM for some tests and by 8PM still wasn't home and hadn't called. So, my mother gets al quasi- frantic and starts snapping at me, which I know she's doing because she's worried, and calls the emergency room- but of the wrong hospital! Discovering her error, she calls the correct hospital but no one in Emergency would pick up so she calls Admissions instead. They inform her that he has infact been admitted and has only just gotten a bed, to which she asks, "Why didn't anyone call me?" Off we go to the hospital, again, she's snapping at me as I'm driving the Tardis to the hospital to see my father and I'm snapping right back. I hate when she critiques my driving! I actually said, "Enough, Hyacinth!" That made her laugh but I made myself clear. (For those of you that don't know, "Hyacinth" is a character from a Brit. Com. called "Keeping Up Appearances" and does this annoying thing when her husband is driving.) Anyway, we arrive at the Emergency room and the nurse directs us to my father. She laughs because she quipped about he had just called home and was stunned that he had gotten the machine. I inform her it's because we were already on our way. So, we went to see him. My mother calmed down. He actually looked really good, although he was hooked up to an I.V. They were keeping him overnight because he has diverticulitis and his blood pressure was up. Oi! Parents! Off to lunch. More later, I'm sure.

ARGH! I have the worst luck in the world with, of all things, pantyhose! Men are so damn lucky that they don't have to deal with the blasted things! Every day that I have to wear them to work I inevitably get holes and at least one run in them and it sucks because they aren't exactly cheap! And they're hot and miserable and just horrible and a necessary evil! Blast! I just put yet another hole in a brand new pair! Bastard Bitch!

When I was in highschool I had a wannbe member of the Ghastapo for an English Teacher. I had a love- hate relationship with him- he loved to torment me and I hated that he knew every single button to push to get me to start fighting with him. Eventually, I smartened up and learned it was just much better for my piece of mind to just ignore him and would draw or write through class. Really what it was was that he just loved to push his students that he felt were talented. I learned to appreciate him much, much more once I was out of highschool. He was a good teacher in the respect that I didn't realize what I had actually learned until later. Every once in a while, post highschool, a bell would go off and I would go. "Oooh, so that's what he was talking about!"

Mr. Porter came up with some gems, that 12 years later (I can't believe I just wrote that! God, I feel OLD!) I can still recall with alarming rapidity. The L.A. Five- a list of phrases, grammatical gems- if you will, that he said all people from Lackawanna said. I have worked damn hard to virtually eradicate all traces of these from my speech! I am loathe to admit that they do pop in every now and again. And they are:
1. It don't
2. You's guys
3. of seen
4. of took
5. have went

The thing about these little, innocuous phrases is that they are so insidious, they're out of your mouth before you even realize what you've said!

But Mr. Porter's L.A. Five are not why I'm posting today. It was something else that he taught us all, that many of his former students, my brother included, can still recite. At the time, it was just a pain in the ass but once I got past the annoyance of it all, and really listened to what was being said that I understood it.
It was a quote from Confucious.

"If Language is not correct, then what is said is not meant. If what is said is not meant then morals and art deteriorate. If morals and art deteriorate, then justice goes astray. If just goes astray, the people will stand about in helpless confusion. Hence, there must be no doubt about what is said. This matters above everything."