07/22/04 05:59 - ID#34938

Let the Debate Rage On...

I have to get into this because, well, I just do. I completely understand what Stickboy saying about time. There are times when I am so busy I beg for that reprieve of just being able to stay home and veg. out to an action movie- no thought involved- and I won't go out, even for my friends because, frankly, (and this is going to come out badly but there's no other way to say it) I come first. I agree that I would have to be ludicrisly interested in someone in order to take the time to crawl out from that state of mind. I haven't had that happen yet.

That being said, my big beef is with those stupid ass games that people insist upon playing! The whole, "I'll call you!" and then they don't and then wonder why you didn't call them. Because you said you would call me. I can't stand that stupid deception and men and women do it. I don't because I mean what I say when I say it. Duplicity sucks!

Permalink: Let_the_Debate_Rage_On_.html
Words: 178
Location: Sunny LA, NY

07/22/04 12:11 - ID#34937

miss that Girl!

I really appreciate everyone's input into the book thing. Frankenstein is definitely one to add, especially considering that it won the contest amongst Percy Shelley, Lord Byron, and Mary Wolstonecraft Shelley. Let's face it amongst that crew, it can't be a slouch! Enough of my mini-history lesson... I have a tendency to do things like that. I think it has something to do with the fact that I absorb information like a sponge.

The real topic of this e-mail is my misery over my other best friend being away. Trisha is one, and she has not gone away for the present, but my other best friend is Dina, a very bohemian, artist, who I rely on probably more than is actually healthy. She is my guru, the one person that I turn to for everything and have been doing so since I was fourteen. Sometimes it amazes me that we've been friends for nearly 12 years and other times it just seems like she's been there forever, that there wasn't a time before we were friends. And now, she has been camping for weeks and I'm freaking out because I need to talk to her! It never fails, she goes away, stuff happens in my life and then I'm practically going into convulsions because I can't talk to her! I wish I knew what it was about her that has this crazily calming effect. She is my sanity.

God, I miss her!

Permalink: miss_that_Girl_.html
Words: 241
Location: Sunny LA, NY

07/21/04 11:07 - ID#34936

Literature

Thanks, MK. I had read "To Kill a Mockingbird" and it is also one of my favourites but it had slipped my mind when I was writing that impromptu list. I also read, believe it or not, "Peter Pan" and "the Wizard of Oz" which for those of you who have not read "the Wizard of Oz"- it's frikken' Great! And I love to see compare and contrast it to the movie. Especially now, after I'd gotten my history degree to understand what he was REALLY saying, the hidden meanings that the piffle of the movie covered up by completely gutting the book... Before I get lynched, I love the movie but I have to appreciate it as far away as possible from the book. That's all. TTFN ;)

Permalink: Literature.html
Words: 129
Location: Sunny LA, NY

07/22/04 12:16 - ID#34935

Educational Lapses

After reading other entries, or talking to other people, I am sometimes left with the realization of how my education is lacking. Upon reading Stickboy's second to most recent entry, it occurred to me all of the "Classics" of literture that I have not read.

I have not read 1. The Huntchback of Notre Dame
2. The Grapes of Wrath
3. Crime and Punishment
4. the Count of Monte Cristo
5. Wuthering Heights
6. the Scarlet Letter
7. Jane Eyre
8. A Tale of Two Cities
9. A Christmas Carol
10. Emma
11. Frankenstein
12. Dracula

And that's all I can think of for now, but I know that there are Many, Many others.

I have read Ivanhoe, A Farewell to Arms, Sense and Sensibility, Pride and Prejudice, Mansfield Park, Northanger Abbey, Persuasion, The Three Musketeers (so Fabulous!)... and some P.G. Wodehouse (of which I am sure my spelling is off!) I feel so illiterate! I shall just have to knock these off one by one. Any other suggestions for my reading list would be appreciated, but keep in mind, they must be "Classics". I'll let y'all know how it goes. If it goes at all!

Permalink: Educational_Lapses.html
Words: 185
Location: Sunny LA, NY

07/18/04 06:10 - ID#34934

Pink Virgin

Up until last night, I was a 'Pink' Virgin. I had never gone and had heard a great deal and, well, it was time to pop that proverbial cherry.
So, as yesterday was the oh-so-fabulous Trisha's birthday, after Shakespeare in the Park, we headed on down to Frank's and then over to the Pink. I must say, I had a total blast! Although, it truly sucks being the only non-smoker amongst my friends. But alas, such is my decision so I shall bear it, although not very merrily.

It was great to meet other epeeps, to put a journal to an actual person.

Oh, and the funniest thing was after the Pink, as we headed back to T's apartment in a not-so-drunken stupor, we popped into Cathode Ray, well, I popped in, she hopped the fence and as a result, got kicked out! And the most chivalrous, gorgeous gay boy of all time defended her beautifully. Wherever you may be, thank you ever so much. It was great!

Permalink: Pink_Virgin.html
Words: 168
Location: Sunny LA, NY

07/14/04 03:17 - ID#34933

An old friend

My oldest brother, whom I adore, is a horrible thief! Not in the "steal from a decrepid grandmother" sort of way, more in the, "Borrow stuff from baby sister and never return it" way. Of course, I'm the idiot who keeps loaning him stuff but that's in my "I want to share such great stuff!" excitement. Then there are things that I ban him from taking that he Shanghi's anyway, as in the case of one of my Ella Fitzgerald CD's! Recently, however, I have been able to exact some vengence in this arena. Due to unfortunate circumstances, he has had to leave the majority of his CD collection at my house. Alas, I have only been able to reclaim one of the lost ones. Portishead "Dummy". My Smiths "Singles" is still missing. He has the case, but the CD itself is lost, probably to the Land of the Left Sock. But my Portishead disc, that was a fabulous re-find. To listen to "Sourtimes" and "Glory Box" is like visiting an old friend. Aaahhhh! Good times, good times! Now, if only I could find that Ella CD... hmmmm...

Permalink: An_old_friend.html
Words: 188
Location: Sunny LA, NY

07/14/04 01:46 - ID#34932

So Tired

I'm too tired to write but I desperately want to, so I will waste space and time with piffle. I'm constantly tired as of late and wonder if I shall ever not be tired again. I wake up, exhausted. It somehow doesn't seem right that after 7 hours of sleep, I'm still so damnedably tired. And I wonder, does dwelling on being tired make a person more tired... I will stop wasting everyone's time with this atrocious dribble. Wherever you are, my wish is that are well rested!

Permalink: So_Tired.html
Words: 87
Location: Sunny LA, NY

07/13/04 12:58 - ID#34931

The Jaded Romantic

That is fast becoming my title. I used to be such pathetic Romantic, in love with the idea and the ideal of Love. Now, I find myself becoming very jaded but I do still believe in it, just not with the rampant stupidity that graced my former years. Now, when I hear the heroine say things like, "I'm ready for a Romantic Love!" I find myself wanting to scream, "And it won't last, you stupid Cow!" I watch movies like "My Best Friend's Wedding" and think that they should make a sequel, "My Best Friend's Divorce" with the same cast and characters. There must be something wrong with me. Damn Disney and those stupid fairy tales!

Permalink: The_Jaded_Romantic.html
Words: 116
Location: Sunny LA, NY

07/11/04 02:58 - ID#34930

the future

Sometimes, Yoda's words to Luke reverbate in my head..."He always looked away to the future. Never his mind on where he was (punctuated by jabs with his walking stick), What he was doing!" It was an admonition that seemed scarily apropos to me! Friday, as I was buying stuff for my new apartment that I don't yet have (again looking towards the future, but this time only a couple of months!), I realized that my future is now. It might seem crazy,and so damnedably cliched, but true. That moment that I have been buying for, saving for, wishing for, waiting for, has arrived and it felt really, really good. My future has arrived. Now, I just have to live every moment like that, like my future has just arrived because let's face it, every moment IS like that! So what am I waiting for?

Permalink: the_future.html
Words: 146
Location: Sunny LA, NY

07/06/04 04:46 - ID#34929

My Curse

Cowardice is my curse. And it's something that developed over time because once upon a time, I used to be brave. I try to pinpoint when precisely this cowardice took such an encompassing hold of me and I can't. Sometime in college. And it isn't as though I had some huge rejection in college that occurred. Perhaps it isn't just one thing, one devastating event. Perhaps it's just the everyday that has had such an effect.

I fight and rail against this. And in many aspects of my life, this is getting much, much better. I'm finally going to be getting my own place, in the autumn. I'm living my own life. But when it comes to men, I just can't put myself out there. That fear of being shot down stops me cold and nothing can make me budge. And I detest it but it's so safe and comfy and warm to be alone, by myself. But it's that "lone" part that really sticks out. And it makes so damn hard to get a great date to a wedding! ARGH! Some how, some way, I will find courage in this arena.

Permalink: My_Curse.html
Words: 192
Location: Sunny LA, NY

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