It seems my current user sound stil fits my state of mind so continue to enjoy it.

UPDATE::: Actually I'm going to change it. This is a Deep Dish remix of an old Fleetwood Mac tune called "Dream." Don't forget Deep Dish will be at the Guverment on May 21st. We missed Oakenfold who was at Kool Haus on April 13th. Damn it.

Okay here we go:

Alot of my ol' friends from Hard Rock are getting together today to celebrate the marriage of one of the girls I used to work with and hang out with. at one point we were all pretty good friends spending lots of time together working, drinking after work, going on vacations together and making day trips to the park and stuff. Its been brought to my attention that a lot of thought went into inviting me but it was decided by the wedding party that i would only bring the moment down. I guess a lot of people thought I would make everyone uncomfortable because my "ex" and her friends are the wedding party and why ruin a good time? Not to mention the next to last time I saw my ex her new ogar boyfriend that she left me for started pushing me around telling me it wasn't to cool for me to do burnouts on front of his house in the middle of the night. WHat can I say I was extremely emotional and irrational?? My feelings overwhelmed me and I participated in behavior that was reckless and out of character. It was good expirience and I can say that I will never go down that road again.

But anyway as I was saying, this big guy starts pushing me around so I quickly brought one of my elbows up and hit him in the chin. I saw his head snap back and his arms go up but before had achance to recover I slammed him with a spinning elbow, putting all my body weight and momentum into the hardest part of my body. I knocked the son of a bithch out right in front of about 20 friends or so. I guess that's what he gets for fucking with a trained fighter and pssing on my lawn. The guy left his pregnante girlfirend to steal away mine when we were on the rocks. Brilliant strategy like this belongs on Jerry Springer but unfortunately they consider themselves middle class.

BUt anyway, again, I'm sittin here emotionally fucked up for the time being wishing my friends would call me so we could get together again like the good ol' days. before me and the ex broke up we were a tight group but she had to go and ruin that for me too. (I guess its my fault too). I miss working at the Hard Rock and I miss the friendships I developed there. I'm glad the two best friendships I made their weren't damaged and I can call my buddy Scotty in NYC anytime along with Greg at the CIA in Hyde Park.

I guess I feel like shit cause of the dream I woke up to. It resembles this situation to a T. only the wedding party was stationed at my cousin Mark's house and I was free to stop by for a bottle of water and see everybody.

Life sucks but I'm compelled to keep on livin it cause you never know what tomorrow will bring. I think that's so exciting about life, wondering where will the tide take you.

Love all, Serve all, MrDT

Alot of my ol' friends from Hard Rock are getting together today to celebrate the marriage of one of the girls I used to work with and hang out with. at one point we were all pretty good friends spending lots of time together working, drinking after work, going on vacations together and making day trips to the park and stuff. Its been brought to my attention that a lot of thought went into inviting me but it was decided by the wedding party that i would only bring the moment down. I guess a lot of people thought I would make everyone uncomfortable because my "ex" and her friends are the wedding party and why ruin a good time? Not to mention the next to last time I saw my ex her new ogar boyfriend that she left me for started pushing me around telling me it wasn't to cool for me to do burnouts on front of his house in the middle of the night. WHat can I say I was extremely emotional and irrational?? My feelings overwhelmed me and I participated in behavior that was reckless and out of character. It was good expirience and I can say that I will never go down that road again.

But anyway as I was saying, this big guy starts pushing me around so I quickly brought one of my elbows up and hit him in the chin. I saw his head snap back and his arms go up but before had achance to recover I slammed him with a spinning elbow, putting all my body weight and momentum into the hardest part of my body. I knocked the son of a bithch out right in front of about 20 friends or so. I guess that's what he gets for fucking with a trained fighter and pssing on my lawn. The guy left his pregnante girlfirend to steal away mine when we were on the rocks. Brilliant strategy like this belongs on Jerry Springer but unfortunately they consider themselves middle class.

BUt anyway, again, I'm sittin here emotionally fucked up for the time being wishing my friends would call me so we could get together again like the good ol' days. before me and the ex broke up we were a tight group but she had to go and ruin that for me too. (I guess its my fault too). I miss working at the Hard Rock and I miss the friendships I developed there. I'm glad when of the two best friendships I made their weren't damaged and I can call my buddy Scotty in NYC anytime along with Greg at the CIA in Hyde Park.

I guess I feel like shit cause of the dream I woke up to. It resembles this situation to a T. only the wedding party was stationed at my cousin Mark's house and I was free to stop by for a bottle of water and see everybody.

Life sucks but I'm compelled to keep on livin it cause you never know what tomorrow will bring. I think that's so exciting about life, wondering where will the tide take you.

Love all, Serve all, MrDT

It was the best of times it was the worst of times. I just turned off Bill & Ted's excellent adventure not because it is a stupid movie but because the overwhelming feeling of nostalgia came over the top of me and bummed me right out. The first time I saw the movie I think I was in the seventh grade when all I worried about was making it to soccer practice, delivering papers/collecting, singing the national anthem before the pro-sports games began and my parents were still happy together. life was so much easier then and it was such a happier time for me. I had friends, a bike, incoming cash flow, a happy family, small acting/singing roles at Studio Arena & Shea's and not much responsibility. It seems to me that when I hit high school my life just went downhill getting further and further is this uncontrolable depressive state.

I woke up pretty sad this morning. Last night I had a dream that my friends from high school (the g-clic, much like the T-Birds, a group of about 12-15 guys) and I had gotten back together to hang out in southern florida for spring break. it was like all of us forgot about the reasons we stopped hanging out and started to have some reckless fun in the sun, the way we did after high school. it was a great time horsing around with the old gang, pushing each other around playfully; picking up/seducing girls with ease and arguing over who the man was. i guess deep down i long to get us all togehter again but it would never happen. even though some have moved away the rest of us don't talk anymore for some serious reasons. I could go into it but it would be rather lenghty and petty but I can tell you the reasons range from ratting one another out to the police over drug busts to fucking somebodies girlfriend or soon to be girlfriend.

At the end of january I stopped talking to my longtime friend who I have spent the majority of my time with over the past 12 years or so. I realizd, as most of my friends had previously stated, that he takes advantage of people and uses people for his own personal gain no matter the consequences. Well what he did was the last straw so I just stopped talking to him. he calls from time to time but i don't answer and i don't return his phone calls. although one time i did be mistake and he asked me if i was still mad and I was like yah. then he was like "thats to bad because he knows some easy girls we could have gotten with." then i was like okay bye and that was it.

i'm really tired of the way the people of the world treat one another. its like we make these phony assumptions about who people are and never really give anyone a chance. then we use these people as stepping stones to get to the land of instant gratification. well, not me and probably not some of you. actually, a lot of you are really nice people and it has been a pleasure to get to know some over the past month or so. you all are like my new friends and you couldn't have come at a better time. i've been really lonely and sad longing for the good ol' days. but i realize now that these days can be the good days to cause life is what you make it - you only get out what you put in. half the reason i went back to school was because i wanted to meet a few people that shared some of the same interests i have. but i realized the other night at opm, after one of my canisius classmates walked by me like 6 times looking in the opposite direction everytime, that most people don't give a shit and the reason they say hello in class is so they don't have to sit in silence and stare at the wall. I have to say that (e:ladycroft) and (e:theecarey) are two special people and thank you for the concern you showed by keeping me fully stocked with bottled water.

that's all I have. i still feel like shit but I think its because i haven't been to the gym in a couple of days on account of this cold I have (its better to let your body heal before you puond the crap out of it in the gym).

This was a picture of my garbage can this morning....i've cleared almost a whole box of kleenex:



its time I get my lazy ass to the gym then I have to reheat some food for cash. once again I give you all the greatest gift I can:

Love, Mrdt