Really Lysol can clean your vag and save your marriage? If that's the case I vote for dirty vag and being single.

I work with this gentleman who is from Italy. He is uber high maintenance. On top of this sometimes he has the most odd requests. Like this one I just received:

Quick question: the brother of a client passed away. Do you have a sample note I could use or maybe suggest two lines?
Do you say something like....
Joe:
I was just told from Dave about the major loss you had in your family.
My deepest condolence to you and your family.

Do I have a sample note? Hmm, let me look in my files labeled "sample notes for death". Dude I have a hard enough time coming up with something to say off the top of my head, let alone coming up with things for you to say. My suggestion is just ignore it. That's what I do. Or you could go to www.someecards.com and use something like this:

Ok so a while back I posted about my mid-year bonus. Basically what happened is our Company told us we weren't getting our bonuses when we thought we were getting them. In turn my boss cut me a personal check and gave me my bonus early. The deal was when the company paid us I'd just repay her. Well the Firm funally gave us our bonuses and I cut her a check. I mailed it to her with a Thank You note on a post-it (because that's how working professionals communicate). Anyways like 3 weeks have gone by and she didn't cash it. This morning I get a email from her saying to call her in the morning "in regards to the check". I knew for sure it didn't bounce because I've been SUPER careful about my spending and keeping that money in my account. I'd die if a check to her bounced.

Anyways I was so worried about why we had to have a call about it. And our call got delayed until 5:30pm. All day I kept thinking "why do we need a call?". So finally she calls me and her husband is on the call. I though WHOA this is no joke. So after ALL of that she tells me she is ripping up the check as an early birthday present. Wow, my mom doesn't even give me that much for my birthday. I kinda wanted to ask her to adopt me, but I didn't feel the time was right. Maybe next time I have a conf call with her and her husband I'll bring it up..

The long anticipated album Blackout drops today. And by long anticipated I mean I learned that its release is today because Circuit City is selling it for $8. This brings me to my question. Do I buy it? I've listened to it thanks to msn.com and my jobs internet connection. It's ok for the most part- some a lot of songs are awful. But it's only $8 and its good dancy music, in case I ever have a dance party in my shoe box apartment and need some dancy music action.

On a totally different note my mom asked me for a christmas list. I asked for the pig. She didn't seem really into it. Her reasoning was "But you don't collect pigs". Well maybe I do now mom! I want that damn pig.

I have donated $20 to estrip under "Anonymous".

There was this episode of Curb where Larry David and Ted Dansen both contributed to a hospital and Ted did it under Anonymous- but told everyone and Larry donated under his name. Well, when the hospital announced Larry's name he got polite applause. When Anonymous was announced everyone cheered and clapped really loud. Larry was pissed that Anonymous was more popular than him even though it wasn't really Anonymous.

So in hopes that my great contribution to estrip will not go unnoticed and will earn me great accolades, I have made my contribution under anonymous.