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Kangarooboi's Journal
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03/03/2006 21:34 #24900
And the03/03/2006 21:34 #24899
And03/03/2006 21:34 #24898
And my02/27/2006 22:11 #24897
My stupidity. . .Category: stupidity
When I get stressed, my body hatres me and I feel like I am going to be sick. This my friends is how I have felt all night. Why do you ask? Becasue I let myself get all worked up over a stupid assignment for my History of Higher Ed class. Tell me, can I get anymore stupid?
I mean, I know this is stupid but yet it still happends. However, I have yet to really find a way to make it NOT happen. Its like an unconscious thing. It just naturally occurs without me thinking about it. One minute i'm find and next thing...BOOM...there goes my stomach. BLAH!
I hate my life sometimes.
I mean, I know this is stupid but yet it still happends. However, I have yet to really find a way to make it NOT happen. Its like an unconscious thing. It just naturally occurs without me thinking about it. One minute i'm find and next thing...BOOM...there goes my stomach. BLAH!
I hate my life sometimes.
02/17/2006 00:21 #24896
RamblingsCategory: randomness
Its funny how random the mood to write will strike me. I was down in Perks with another Assistant Hall Director when I got this strange urge to just write. I used to get like that when I was younger and wrote several short stories about a detective named Henry Michaels (Middle name and First Name). My favorite story was when he was called on a case to find Geo. Washington's Missing Wooden False Teeth. I wish I saved it from my old comptuer. Who knows...I could have published it and make TONS of money! I guess hindsight is 20/20!
There has been a lot of stuff floating in my head the past week or so. Some good, some not so good and some kinda dirty! (But hey...i'm allowed I'm a guy! What is it they say...guys think of sex every 3sec? 5sec? I wonder if that is different for a gay guy? I sware I think about sex every 1.79sec). Anyways, back to what's floating in my head.
This is the week that my Hall Director hears back whether or not she got the job that she interviewed for. She HAS to hear tomorrow either way because she was told she would her in about two weeks...and that time is now. At times I wish that she didn't tell me that she ihad a job interview. I just keep thinking about the what ifs that might happen. I mean, what if she gets the job? I am going to have to do my work as an Assistant Hall Director ON TOP of the regular Hall Director work. I just don't know if I am going to be able to do it with taking classes and such. So that has been a BIG problem in my head
Secondly, I just realized today that I am going to Washington D.C in a few weeks and really don't have money for it. The trip is pretty much paid for except for maybe some lunches/dinners and extra things. I am probably going to have to ask my mom for a loan which i'm not excited about becasue I don't know when I am going to be able to pay her back. <Sigh>
Thirdly I am having SEVERE self-esteem issues lately. My clothes are fitting differently (some not at all) and that really makes me angry with myself. How could I let me self to get fat? So now I feel that I am fat and ugly and worthless and doubt everything that I do. That is def. not a good feeling to have. I am attempting to eat A LOT healthier and not snacking. I went to Wegmans on Sunday and spent $7.79 for my weekly groceries. It seems that unconsciously that I am trying not buying food and starving myself a little in hopes that I will lose weight that way. But I doubt that is going to work.
Forthly I am severly procrastinating with my grad school work. I have tons of work for my Tech class (although 100% pointless and worthless) and I just have not got around to doing it yet. I guess I enjoy procrastination like I do masturnbation...I dunno. (You know the saying...Procrastination is like masturbation...at first it feels good but in the end your just fucking yourself). Hmm..(e:TheeCarey) never head that..maybe its only a Binghamton thing...I dunno! <scratches head>
See that's a lot of stuff in my head jsut floating! Plus not to mention that this is February (middle of it)! I sware I just moved to Buffalo in Aug and into my apartment at UB! And now all of a sudden I am reapplying for my job here! Where did the time go?!?! GOOD GOD!
Well yeah, this is a long rambling of odd stuff. Like I said when I get in the mood I just type and type. But I feel that I should end this with something enlightening or intelligent or maybe a good quote that someone said!!!
Ah yes...I know the perfect quote! In the infamous words of someone VERY VERY famous..."th th th that's all folks"! (Okay..may not be the most intelligent or enlightening thing ever...but it works!)
OH! By the way...welcome (e:kwhoissuper) to (e:strip)! Good luck with the foreskin thing!
There has been a lot of stuff floating in my head the past week or so. Some good, some not so good and some kinda dirty! (But hey...i'm allowed I'm a guy! What is it they say...guys think of sex every 3sec? 5sec? I wonder if that is different for a gay guy? I sware I think about sex every 1.79sec). Anyways, back to what's floating in my head.
This is the week that my Hall Director hears back whether or not she got the job that she interviewed for. She HAS to hear tomorrow either way because she was told she would her in about two weeks...and that time is now. At times I wish that she didn't tell me that she ihad a job interview. I just keep thinking about the what ifs that might happen. I mean, what if she gets the job? I am going to have to do my work as an Assistant Hall Director ON TOP of the regular Hall Director work. I just don't know if I am going to be able to do it with taking classes and such. So that has been a BIG problem in my head
Secondly, I just realized today that I am going to Washington D.C in a few weeks and really don't have money for it. The trip is pretty much paid for except for maybe some lunches/dinners and extra things. I am probably going to have to ask my mom for a loan which i'm not excited about becasue I don't know when I am going to be able to pay her back. <Sigh>
Thirdly I am having SEVERE self-esteem issues lately. My clothes are fitting differently (some not at all) and that really makes me angry with myself. How could I let me self to get fat? So now I feel that I am fat and ugly and worthless and doubt everything that I do. That is def. not a good feeling to have. I am attempting to eat A LOT healthier and not snacking. I went to Wegmans on Sunday and spent $7.79 for my weekly groceries. It seems that unconsciously that I am trying not buying food and starving myself a little in hopes that I will lose weight that way. But I doubt that is going to work.
Forthly I am severly procrastinating with my grad school work. I have tons of work for my Tech class (although 100% pointless and worthless) and I just have not got around to doing it yet. I guess I enjoy procrastination like I do masturnbation...I dunno. (You know the saying...Procrastination is like masturbation...at first it feels good but in the end your just fucking yourself). Hmm..(e:TheeCarey) never head that..maybe its only a Binghamton thing...I dunno! <scratches head>
See that's a lot of stuff in my head jsut floating! Plus not to mention that this is February (middle of it)! I sware I just moved to Buffalo in Aug and into my apartment at UB! And now all of a sudden I am reapplying for my job here! Where did the time go?!?! GOOD GOD!
Well yeah, this is a long rambling of odd stuff. Like I said when I get in the mood I just type and type. But I feel that I should end this with something enlightening or intelligent or maybe a good quote that someone said!!!
Ah yes...I know the perfect quote! In the infamous words of someone VERY VERY famous..."th th th that's all folks"! (Okay..may not be the most intelligent or enlightening thing ever...but it works!)
OH! By the way...welcome (e:kwhoissuper) to (e:strip)! Good luck with the foreskin thing!
kwhoissuper - 02/17/06 02:31
lol thanx...
lol thanx...
ladycroft - 02/17/06 01:06
did someone say dancing?!?
did someone say dancing?!?
theecarey - 02/17/06 00:48
SoCo and Lime buddies *and* work out buddies.. we'll go and dance our asses off!! :)
SoCo and Lime buddies *and* work out buddies.. we'll go and dance our asses off!! :)
Try something with chamomile, such as Tazo's Tea "Calm." I've also been know to smoke a j but this can bring uneccessary paranoia. You can also try doing something physical like running that will get your mind off of it and raise your seratonin levels. Or just throw in a cd and dance.
i hope the hugs helped :) just know we're in it together bra, love ya!
I tend to feel stress in my stomach, too, so i sympathize with your pain and frustration. I wish i could give you a suggestion on something that could help you.
For whatever reason with me, i have foods that settle my stomach and bananas are one of them. I used to have a job i hated a lot and i used to get the worst pains on the way to work. I started having a banana on the bus ride to work and it really helped me. Odd, but it worked!
Good luck!
that's ok, I get the runny poos when I'm stressed out :-{