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07/15/04 10:22 - ID#24054

Cranky Ranting

I want to apologize in advance for this post. I am kind of in a cranky mood so if I snap at you, I don't mean it.

I would just like to start off by saying, the NY Times reporters are the most self-righteous full-of-themselves assholes ever. This fucker calls the office this morning and whenever a reporter calls I have to tell my press secretary what he is calling about so he can be sure he has the info he needs to respond near him. When I answer he gives me his name and that he is from the New York Times. I ask him if our press secretary knows why he is calling (most reporters get the hint that I want to know what topic it is on). He says "no." I then ask him, what are you calling about? He answers me, "I'm writing an article (no fucking shit sherlock, you are a reporter and you are calling a communications office, that is pretty much the only reason our office exists). I then ask him, "What is the article about?" He proceeds to tell me in the most condescending I'm-from-the-New-York-Times-you-know-the-greatest-and-most-important-newspaper-out-there-we-only-print-"all-the-news-that's-fit-to-print" tone of voice, "It is a very complicated issue, and I don't want to have to explain it twice" I just wanted to tell him off. Fuck him. He is a reporter, his job is to make complicated issues simple so that people can understand them. Plus, I work there. I know what reporters are asking about. I talk to 30 a day. I was not looking for a goddamn essay, just a simple - "its about Iraq funding" or "its about the Midsession review" I don't really care what you ask about, it is my boss who wants to know. I won't be answering your question. I just went in and told my press secretary that I wouldn't be able to understand the issue so I don't know what he wants.

To continue on my bitchyness, [inlink]holly,68[/inlink] I don't mean to be a nitpicker, but the states created the federal government, it wasn't the other way around. I know that is not the point of the entry and I apologize for being such an asshole. It is just one of those pet peeves.

Speaking of things that are annoying me. I have another article due for my friend's website (see my shameless selfpromotion). I know what I want to write it on, but I don't feel like doing it because NOONE reads them. It is understandable because we realy haven't done any advertising for the site and everyone is home for the summer, but it just frustrates me when I put the effort in only to get a total of 3 responses that aren't me from the 3 articles I have written. It is also frustrating to check the views count and see it at 13 and you know 4 of those are you. And when other articles get responses but yours don't. I don't know it is just disheartening.

Ok on to other things, I am sure you are tired of hearing me bitch and I am sorry I am such a downer today.

Here is a well written article on the gay marriage amendment outing controversy from the Washington Post. I am probably going to have to agree with the general sentiment that they shouldn't out gay conservatives. I guess the arguement comes down to does the end justify the means. Call me an idealist, but I don't really think it or anything does. What good are the principles you hold if you are willing to violate them. You aren't really principled anymore. There is some quote that my mom has on our fridge at home about what good is it if you become as evil as the evil you are seeking to destroy. That is enough of the preaching. Here is the article:


Capitol Hill Insiders Irked By Campaign To 'Out' Them

By Rebecca Dana and Jose Antonio Vargas
Washington Post Staff Writers
Thursday, July 15, 2004; Page C01

The phone kept ringing in one Capitol Hill office -- hourly, daily, all leading up to yesterday's Senate vote on the constitutional amendm
en
t to ban gay marriage. Mike Rogers was on the line again. He knew something very personal about the press secretary of a Republican House member who supports the amendment, and he wanted to tell someone, preferably someone high-ranking, that the man is gay. Rogers cannot understand this. How can someone help articulate the opposition to homosexual unions when he himself is homosexual?

Rogers, a 40-year-old Washington fundraising consultant, has waged a controversial "outing" campaign in the month leading up to yesterday's vote. He sent out more 10,000 e-mails encouraging and perpetrating outings. He handed out fliers at the gay pride parade in June, asking people to send in names of gay Hill staffers working for senators and representatives who supported the Federal Marriage Amendment. He created a Web log last week listing some of those names.

He made phone calls, day and night, to the offices and homes of these staffers. His message: How dare you?

Rogers's campaign has caused a stir throughout the capital, rallying some gay-rights advocates and horrifying others, for demanding that people who are gay and Republican to defend themselves. Rogers says he plans to continue his campaign despite yesterday's vote -- the amendment was defeated 50-48 but probably will be taken up by the House this fall -- and he will tack on a "fidelity pledge" to expose members of Congress who promote "family values" but have extramarital affairs.

Openly gay since 1986, Rogers views the marriage amendment as a "very personal" hit. Everything he says on the topic ends with an exclamation point. There is "the conspiracy," he fires, "on Capitol Hill!" And "the hypocrisy," he can't believe, "among gay staffers!" He is riled up, energized and organized, using "sources" around the District to identify and expose the homosexuals on the Hill who, he believes, are abetting discrimination aimed at themselves.

"This is the big cheese!" he says. "We are under attack! Gays and lesbians are under attack! It's amazing to me that people don't get that! So what are we going to do? Protect these gay staffers who have influence on policy matters while their bosses spew hate and bigotry?"

No, says John Aravosis, national co-chairman of the activist Web site DearMary.com -- which last week ran an ad in the Washington Blade, the gay weekly newspaper, that read: "For Years Our Silence Has Protected You. Today That Protection Ends." And the Blade itself has published back-to-back front-page stories on the outing campaign, naming senior staffers and two elected officials -- one congressman, one senator -- whose names have been circulating on the Web and in other gay publications.

In an editorial on July 2, the Blade's executive editor, Chris Crain, wrote: "It is 2004, not 1954, and sexual orientation in and of itself is no longer a 'private fact' beyond the pale of inquiry." The Blade, he wrote, "would investigate and report about whether influential Hill aides are gay if facts about their sexual orientation raise highly newsworthy questions of hypocrisy in the stands taken by anti-gay members of Congress for whom they work."

Crain, in a phone interview, explains his controversial position: "The more these staffers are personally responsible for policies that challenge the basic civil rights of gay people, the more it's our responsibility, as a gay newspaper, to ask them how they justify those positions considering that they're gay."

Rogers, Aravosis and Crain inherited strategic outing as a tactic from the 1980s and 1990s, when several congressmen announced their homosexuality under pressure from others. Republican Steve Gunderson, a former Wisconsin lawmaker, came out in 1994 after threats from both gay-rights activists and House conservatives. In response to a political ad in the Blade and the rumor of a story in the gay magazine the Ad
vocate
, Rep. Jim Kolbe (R-Ariz.) came out in 1996 after voting in favor of the Defense of Marriage Act, which defined marriage as between a man and a woman.

"The whole outing campaign makes me a little uncomfortable, but I still think it's the right thing to do," says Aravosis, a 40-year-old political consultant. "A line has been crossed. When you talk about amending the Constitution to make me a second-class citizen based on my personal relationship, then you've crossed a line of decency."

Gay organizations on the Hill -- the newly formed Gay, Lesbian & Allies U.S. Senate Staff Caucus and the 10-year-old Lesbian and Gay Congressional Staff Association -- oppose Rogers's tactics, as do the Log Cabin Republicans, an organization of gay conservatives that has offered counsel to the targets of Rogers's outings, and the Human Rights Campaign, the country's largest gay-rights advocacy group.

Lynden Armstrong started working for Sen. Pete Domenici (R-N.M.) in 1995, and came out in the office two years later. As administrative director, he manages the senator's five offices -- four in New Mexico, one in Washington. He is a Republican. Being gay, he says, has not been an issue at work. He considers Rogers's campaign a "personal attack" on gay staffers "who haven't gotten to the point, emotionally and psychologically, that they feel that they can come out at work."

"That is a personal decision," says Armstrong, 32, sitting in the office with Fox News playing in the background. A native of Fort Sumner, N.M., now living in the District and co-chairing the nonpartisan Senate Staff Caucus, he declines to comment on whether he supports the marriage amendment. His boss voted for it. "I have to keep in mind that the senator has nothing personal against me or the gay community. He is having to do what he is elected to do -- represent his constituents. And New Mexicans, if you look at the polls, are overwhelmingly supportive of the amendment."

His beef with the Rogers campaign: "What a lot of people don't realize in this whole outing campaign, and one of the bigger problems I have with it, is they're outing people who aren't in the place in their life where they're ready for that to happen. Besides, is outing a staff member going to really affect a senator's or a representative's vote? Is it going to change anyone's position?"

Victor Castillo, a Democrat, has worked on the Hill for 11 years, first for a congressman from San Diego and now as a senior legislative assistant for Rep. Lucille Roybal-Allard (D-Calif.). Castillo is on the executive committee of the Lesbian and Gay Congressional Staff Association. He opposes both the marriage amendment and Rogers's campaign. "What purpose does it serve? It's misdirected. If anything, his campaign pushes people further into the closet."

The press secretary Rogers has threatened to out, one of more than a dozen staffers he has approached, has been open about his homosexuality for years -- to his family, his friends and his co-workers. For even longer, he has been out as a Republican to the same people, which might be an even more daunting position, especially now. He supports, or more accurately doesn't oppose, the marriage amendment, because if calling homosexual unions " 'marriage' is going to upset the fabric of civil society, to me, it ain't that important."

Friends don't understand this, he says. They don't see how the 38-year-old press secretary, who declined to be named at the request of his boss, feels no inner conflict between his job and his sexuality. This gay man is not torn about the marriage amendment. Like others whom Rogers has targeted, he is the opposite of torn.

"The irony of all of this is that the people who should be among the most tolerant when the tables are turned are those who are the first to condemn and judge," he says. "Often the gay platform is one of accepting every X, Y
and Z. Gue
ss what? That hasn't been my life experience. I have more in common with [my Republican colleagues] than I do with any person off the street that happens to be of similar sexual orientation."

© 2004 The Washington Post Company

I guess that is all for now. To all my friends who are going on vaca, enjoy. I can't wait until you visit Jill. Less than a week left than we shall party hearty. Wooo Woooo. Take care of yourselves and sorry I was so cranky, none of it was personal (unless you are a fucker from the NYT) Bye
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07/01/04 10:22 - ID#24053

Speaking of Giving Up Vices

My Roommates and I currently have a bet going on abstaining from selfpleasure. The first two to break down have to put in $5 to our "party fund." Unlike some bets, this is not total abstinence from sex, just self pleasure. You can do whatever you want as long as it is with someone else, and you aren't paying them. (Not that that will help me). It will be interesting. The bet started last saturday and we are all still in. Everyone has me going out first, but hopefully the cheap bastard in me can overrule my urges.

On to other sex/relationship talk, I have to give props to teres "beast" on her comments and the discussion it sparked. It has been really interesting reading everyone's views on that crazy little thing called love (whether physical or emotional). I really enjoyed your response MK. That is all I am going to say about that here.

On to Kenmore cops. My favorite Kenmore cop story is one time when I was hanging out in front of Kenmore West and a fight started and at least two Kenmore Police cars got there way before the school security guards came even close to it. The joys of suburbia.

That is all for now. I am procrastinating on writing an article for Intellectual Wastebasket. I really should do that. Maybe I will or maybe I will just go to sleep. Stay out of trouble, and for all those looking for a good time - no glove. no love.
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06/30/04 09:50 - ID#24052

Bus Wierdness

Due to my early mornings, I have to catch a 5:52 bus at the end of my street. IT sucks waking up that early but I've addressed that previously. Riding that bus is very bizarre because it is not like there are people on the bus who just missed the bus before it and normal people don't wake up that early just to go somewhere. The people on that bus are there because they have to be on that specific bus. As a result, It is the same people on the bus every day. On top of that, everyone sits in the same seats every day- myself included. And noone says anything to anyone else. It is just very eerie getting on that every morning. It is kind of like the movie groundhog day except that I am not changing, but embracing the pattern. This brings up the topic of humans and patterns. Once people start doing something someway, it seems like they keep doing it that way until they can't. Take for example sitting in seats at a class. Most people will sit in the same seat week after week- even if there are no assigned seats and even when they become friends with someone else in the class. They just keep sitting in the same seat because that is where they always have sat. It is just interesting, especially when it is so pronounced as in my morning bus ride. Just a thought.
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06/29/04 10:43 - ID#24051

Not the best of days

Today was not the best of days. First off, I woke up at 3:30 from a really scary dream. There was a huge thunder storm and it was the end of the world (I've been sacred of the end of the world since I saw a movie about the Rapture (simply put when God beams up all the christians before the world ends) in the fourth grade, but that is a whole other entry). When I woke up I was all paranoid. To make it worse, we rarely lock our apartment doors both to our patio (we are on the first floor but it is raise but you can still climb up into it) and our door too the hall (all the people in our building go to AU because the university leases it and plus it is not even a quarter full for the summer). So then I started geting wierded out about that. I had to force myself back to sleep cause I had to get up in another hour cause I am working the early shift this week (I have to be AT work at 6:30 AM).

When I left for work, I was half way down the street to the bus stop when I realized I had forgot my glasses and I had forgot to put on cologne (I am paranoid about smelling bad).

When I got to work things seemed to be going well as I got the news summary done before my boss got into work. But when my supervisor got in, I was chastized for not answering the phone fast enough. She was very nice about it, but it still was a kick in the balls. I don't answer it fast because sometimes she knows it is for her and gets it, so I would wait a second to see if she gets it before I do. I also wasn't quick to answer the phone because I dislike talking on the phone to people I don't know. See previous entry [inlink]jessbob,3[/inlink].

Then, while reading the washington post online, I found an article that I had failed to put in the news summary that specifically mentioned OMB. While scanning it I didn't notice because the first part was about the torture memo, but it turned out to be about all the memos that have been leaked by the administration- Including an OMB memo. I was force to email the article out to all my bosses apologizing for missing it. It was thoroughly embarassing. My supervisor tried to make me feel better by saying "good job catching it." I then pointed out the fact that my own incompetence is the reason for sending out the email. I"m glad my supervisor is nice about things even when I am the moron.

In response to Beast's IMs, I"m fine, just lazy. That's why I haven't changed my away message. Don't worry.

That is all for now. I have to go to bed so I can wake up at 4:30 tomorrow morning. Wooo Hooo.
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06/25/04 11:42 - ID#24050

Reno 911

I bought the Reno 911 DVD the other day. It is such a funny show. I highly reccommend it. If you do like that show, I reccommend the British show The Office. It is out here on DVD. It is the same fake reality TV show format. It is essentially about how awkward and inappropriate the people can be. Because it is British is makes some offensive jokes that American TV couldn't get away with. They only made 12 episodes and then the directors just didn't want to ruin it so they stopped making it. Anyway I highly reccommend it.

I would also like to do something I forgot to in my last entry - welcome maureen. I know you had/have your reservations about the whole online journal thing, but I hope that doesn't stop you from posting a lot. That way I can stalk you too and it isn't as weird because at least I know you. Anyway welcome.

Hmmmmmm. Tomorrow night I am going to my friend nate's b-day party. That should be fun. My roommates are all going to go in for a gift but we don't know what we are getting him yet. I figure worse comes to worse we can always pick something up for him at a sex shop. We'll see.

I really enjoy your theory on people in their cars at beaches Terry. [inlink]terry,254[/inlink] I don't know if TV and computer screens actually have anything to do with it, but it is a great theory if only on the cleverness of it.

I guess that is all. Always remember: red on yellow - kill a fellow; red on black - venom lack (but you will still need a tetanus shot)
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06/24/04 12:41 - ID#24049

Quick Entry

As I haven't posted anything in a while, I figured I should do a quick one before I go to work.

First off, big props to paul on the AIM addition.

Second, Shameless selfpromotion 2.0, I posted another article at my friends website on DC's soon to start ban on hand-held cell phones on driving. It is essentially the same law NY has now. I am not a big fan of either law and the article explains why. Check it out if you feel like it. Let me know what you think. It is at www.intellectualwastebasket.com under the "News & Politics" called "Olczak: Cell Phone Regulations."

Third, I finally got my ID for work, which is cool because I don't have to be cleared into the building each time. But it also means I have to start working mornings next week. Nothing says fun like having to be at work at 6:30 am and the only way to get there is thru public transport. We'll see what happens.

Fourth, I am late for work. I will update for real soon. Bye.
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06/21/04 11:55 - ID#24048

Stalking, but with love

I don't read entries for one day and madness ensues. I'm sorry about the whole stituation, whatever it may be. I know I don't know most of you, but I feel like I do just because I read all of your journal entries. This whole blogging thing is a pretty wierd experience. Especially because, though I don't know most of you, there is only one or two degrees of seperation between us. Kiss our e-strip ass Kevin Bacon.

Speaking of my stalking, a reccommendation for the site if you read this Paul. With the addition of all the new people, I would reccomend expanding the "Last Ten" list. Because so many people now update, when I check for new journal entries I have to now click on "more." It would make it a whole lot easier if there were more listed right there sans click.

I burnt my arm on my iron today. I hurt like heck and now I have a huge line down my arm. And to those that know me, No I wasn't ironing my shirt while it was on me.

Hmmmmm. That is all for now. I just want to say I love you all (though I may or may not actually know you). In the words of Jerry Springer: Take care of yourselves and each another.
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06/20/04 12:09 - ID#24047

Control Room & Fog of War

Yesterday my roommate and I went to see the movie Control Room. It recently opened at a local film festival, the AFI Silverdocs, and it is a documentary about the coverage of the Iraq War on al Jazeera. I highly reccomend it and believe everyone should see it simply on the basis that it gives you an insight into the way the Arab world views Americans. It was a very eye opening experience. Most of the movies is filmed as the behind the scenes coverage of the station, with interviews of the staff and managers of the station that explain their position on things and how and why they broadcast certain things that they got heavily criticized for by the Bush administration. Just to warn you I am about to spoil the end for you - not that it really is a spoiler because it is a documentary. One of the most interesting things in the movie is the exchanges between a US soldier who is one of the American press officials. He is not the guy that gives the big press conferences, but is who the media interview afterwards for clarifications of the US position. He is a good character because he represents the "average American" perception of the conflict. He is not high military brass. As the movie progresses he starts to gain an understanding of the Arab culture and how they view America. One of the best exchenges he has is with an al Jazeera reporter that once worked for the BBC. In trying to explain the American position and how Americans view this conflict in relation to the one in Isreal, the BBC reporter interrupts him and says, "I understand what you are saying, and I understand how the west sees these as two different conflicts, but the Arab world sees them as one. Though the REALLY bad things Isreal does are not done by Americans, the Arab world sees them as one in the same." The soldier responds: "That is interesting. Because if everyone in Arab world sees the Isreal conflict and the Iraq war as linked. There is noone in America that would even think of those two things as the same. The two countries could be on opposite sides of the world for how Americans view the conflict." It was really interesting to hear that those two conflict are considered one by the Arab world. I would never ever think that. That revelation alone is worth the price of the ticket. I think all Americans should see that movie so they can understand how the Arab world views us. That is a really important element that has been overlooked in our approach to foreign policy. Unfortunately, I doubt many will see this movie, and many of those that do aren't the ones that need to see it most.

This leads into another documentary I saw this past week - The Fog of War . It was another amazing and eye opening movie. It is set up as a series of life lessons that Secretary of Defense Robert McNamera (he held that position during the Kennedy and Johnson Administrations for the start and escalation of Vietnam) One of the points he made directly ties into Control Room - Empathize with your enemies. He explains that how we viewed the Vietnam conflict was so strongly from our view that we did not realize that it was viewed by them as a fight for independence. When he went to Vietnam years later and met with his counterparts on the opposite side, and they were telling them how they viewed the war and how they would never be puppets of the Chinese because they hated the Chinese was a revelation to him. He goes on to say that Vietnam failed because we failed to understand this critical fact about our enemy. I think this can be applied to the current war. Because we do not understand the Arab world and how they view us, we will never be successful. That is why everyone needs to see the movie Control Room. Another interesting thing I learned from Fog of War was how close we actually were to nuclear war during the Cuban Missile Crisis. Castro had essentially told Kruschev that he sho
ul
d fire the missiles, even though it would mean total annihilation for Cuba. It was really quite scary. I highly reccomend that movie as well.

Sorry to get so political on your ass in this journal. To change topics: How to Disappear Completely is an amazing song and the entire Kid A album is one of the greates albums of all time. That is all. Thank you. Bye.
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06/20/04 12:08 - ID#24046

Control Room & Fog of War

Yesterday my roommate and I went to see the movie Control Room. It recently opened at a local film festival, the AFI Silverdocs, and it is a documentary about the coverage of the Iraq War on al Jazeera. I highly reccomend it and believe everyone should see it simply on the basis that it gives you an insight into the way the Arab world views Americans. It was a very eye opening experience. Most of the movies is filmed as the behind the scenes coverage of the station, with interviews of the staff and managers of the station that explain their position on things and how and why they broadcast certain things that they got heavily criticized for by the Bush administration. Just to warn you I am about to spoil the end for you - not that it really is a spoiler because it is a documentary. One of the most interesting things in the movie is the exchanges between a US soldier who is one of the American press officials. He is not the guy that gives the big press conferences, but is who the media interview afterwards for clarifications of the US position. He is a good character because he represents the "average American" perception of the conflict. He is not high military brass. As the movie progresses he starts to gain an understanding of the Arab culture and how they view America. One of the best exchenges he has is with an al Jazeera reporter that once worked for the BBC. In trying to explain the American position and how Americans view this conflict in relation to the one in Isreal, the BBC reporter interrupts him and says, "I understand what you are saying, and I understand how the west sees these as two different conflicts, but the Arab world sees them as one. Though the REALLY bad things Isreal does are not done by Americans, the Arab world sees them as one in the same." The soldier responds: "That is interesting. Because if everyone in Arab world sees the Isreal conflict and the Iraq war as linked. There is noone in America that would even think of those two things as the same. The two countries could be on opposite sides of the world for how Americans view the conflict." It was really interesting to hear that those two conflict are considered one by the Arab world. I would never ever think that. That revelation alone is worth the price of the ticket. I think all Americans should see that movie so they can understand how the Arab world views us. That is a really important element that has been overlooked in our approach to foreign policy. Unfortunately, I doubt many will see this movie, and many of those that do aren't the ones that need to see it most.

This leads into another documentary I saw this past week - The Fog of War . It was another amazing and eye opening movie. It is set up as a series of life lessons that Secretary of Defense Robert McNamera (he held that position during the Kennedy and Johnson Administrations for the start and escalation of Vietnam) One of the points he made directly ties into Control Room - Empathize with your enemies. He explains that how we viewed the Vietnam conflict was so strongly from our view that we did not realize that it was viewed by them as a fight for independence. When he went to Vietnam years later and met with his counterparts on the opposite side, and they were telling them how they viewed the war and how they would never be puppets of the Chinese because they hated the Chinese was a revelation to him. He goes on to say that Vietnam failed because we failed to understand this critical fact about our enemy. I think this can be applied to the current war. Because we do not understand the Arab world and how they view us, we will never be successful. That is why everyone needs to see the movie Control Room. Another interesting thing I learned from Fog of War was how close we actually were to nuclear war during the Cuban Missile Crisis. Castro had essentially told Kruschev that he sho
ul
d fire the missiles, even though it would mean total annihilation for Cuba. It was really quite scary. I highly reccomend that movie as well.

Sorry to get so political on your ass in this journal. To change topics: How to Disappear Completely is an amazing song and the entire Kid A album is one of the greates albums of all time. That is all. Thank you. Bye.
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06/18/04 10:30 - ID#24045

Funny Stories Revised

It was pointed out to me that you need to sign into the Washington Post to access those stories. Though I am sure you ALL have Post profiles, I figured I should repost them for the benefit of those that don't as well as another additional story from today's post.

In the Loop
By Al Kamen
Friday, June 18, 2004; Page A27

Dead Dove Disaster:

This just in from BBC News! While Americans are preoccupied with investigations of world terrorism, other nations have different concerns.

So we find that "the Sri Lankan authorities have ordered an inquiry," the BBC reported, "after a dove-freeing ceremony intended to symbolize peace went disastrously wrong."

Seems "one bird was dead before takeoff and 'dropped like a brick,' " the BBC said, quoting its cameraman, Sriyantha Walpola, "soon after it left the hands of the public security minister, Ratnasiri Wickremanayake, at a ceremony last weekend."

And it wasn't as if a flock was taking off. Seems the poor bird was one of seven being released at a recent U.N. ceremony attended by Lt. Gen. James L. Campbell, commander of U.S. Army forces in the Pacific. His bird flew off quite smartly.

So "instead of soaring majestically into the air to symbolize the government's commitment to peace and goodwill," the BBC reported, the bird nose-dived to the ground.

Not to worry.

"A three-member delegation of the military police," led by an army major no less, has been called in "to investigate the mystery of the dead dove." They will look into the circumstances and try to see if there was any sabotage, a defense ministry spokesman said.

Sure, maybe it was the fault of Tamil Tiger separatists. Or maybe it was keeping the birds waiting for a half-hour in 90-degree heat and excessive humidity?

Clear as Mud:

Some folks in Congress are upset by our Saudi friends' occasional hallucinatory outbursts.

Crown Prince Abdullah -- remember, he's the enlightened one in the family, the one the Bush administration is counting on -- was shown on a tape obtained by NBC News blaming a recent wave of terrorist attacks on Zionists.

"Zionism is behind it," Abdullah said, through a translator. "It has become clear now. It has become clear to us," he said. "It is not 100 percent, but 95 percent that the Zionist hands are behind what has happened."

This might be a bit perplexing, since al Qaeda has claimed responsibility for the attacks.

But not to worry. Prince Nayef, the interior minister, explained what's going on. "Al Qaeda is backed by Israel and Zionism." Ah, but of course.

So Rep. Adam Schiff (D-Calif.) has circulated a "Dear Colleague" letter asking for House members to condemn these "scurrilous and inflammatory charges."

It was only a matter of time before people figured out those obvious ties between Osama bin Laden and Ariel Sharon.
    

Just think of it: A Zionist wave is sweeping the Arabian peninsula. Who knew?





Blind Man Drives Golf Cart in Ga. City

PEACHTREE CITY, Ga. - A blind man drove a golf cart for two miles through the
winding streets of Peachtree City, accompanied by his guide dog - and an
inebriated friend giving instructions - before running into a parked car, police
said.

Nobody was hurt, but Samuel McClain, 35, of Stockbridge and Michael Johnston,
47, of Peachtree City were charged with reckless conduct "due to the blatant
disregard for public safety," a police report said.

The report said McClain was driving the cart Saturday while Johnston gave
directions after having six or seven beers and "admittedly under the influence
of alcoholic beverage." Also on the cart was McClain's golden re
tr
iever guide
dog.

The city of 34,000 about 25 miles south of Atlanta has about 80 miles of paved
cart paths and 9,000 registered carts that residents use for daily tasks like
going to the grocery or taking children to school.





Va. Tells Men: No Sex With Young Girls

RICHMOND, Va. - The state is posting billboards with messages such as "Isn't
she a little young?" as part of a campaign to dissuade men from having sex with
underage girls.

The campaign is aimed at reducing the number of young girls who have children
with older men, the Virginia Department of Health said Monday.

In 1999 and 2000 in Virginia, men over 18 were responsible for 219 births
involving girls who were 13 and 14, the department said.

Messages such as "Isn't she a little young?" and "Sex with a minor, don't go
there" also appear on posters, coasters and napkins in bars, restaurants and
stores in five cities.

"We encourage adult men to talk to their peers and discourage them from
pursuing teenagers. What they are doing is unhealthy and against the law," said
Robert Franklin, a health department official.


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