my little cousin is leaving me to move back to rochester... you couldn't pay me to move back east. i really miss my friends and brother and sister and adorable niece but that cold weather keeps me in the warm sunshineyness...

i remember wanting a little sister so bad when i was a child but i have a mean mother and she refused to give me one. my cousin is like the best little sister you could ask for. she's completely adorable, funny, gorgeous, kind, generous and caring. i just want to squish her to pieces so then she can't leave. :o(

i confess, i absolutely could not stand Aubrey when she was just a lil chitlin and her divalike ways just infuriated me. she would never eat her food, always had to sit in the front seat and had to have things her way. wow, she sounds just like me, except i always ate my food and then other people's food as well. i never realized that she idolized me, which is so cute. i remember thinking my older sister was the coolest ever and it's a pretty awesome feeling knowing someone thinks you're the best.

she has grown into quite the young lady and i'll miss having someone to be crazy around. we probably spend about 90% of our time together being complete idiots and laughing nonstop.

i guess nys will be seeing even more of me in the future.

here she is wearing my glasses.

I'm seriously hoping next week is better than this week has been.

My loans have still not gone through and I'm literally down to my last dime. I would have never gotten this stupid diamond in my nose if I realized that my loans wouldn't go through until I'd been in school nearly a month.

To top things off my hearing aids are on back order and I can't hear a damn thing in class. People whisper shit to me all the time. I can't hear whispers. It all makes me want to just talk to no one.


Its tiring and frustrating having to constantly tell people to speak up and then to have them laugh because they think it is funny that I miss out on nearly half of all of conversations. It makes me want to crawl under a rock and not come out until I get the damn things and my money comes through.


I still have more books to buy... I'm not big on crying anymore but I'm just having such a bad week that I'm holding them back.

:o( next week will be better.

The elder members appear to have some issues. I feel they are racist and I hate it. Its embarrassing to me... Especially considering the fact that I am of mixed race.

I will not be going to blo next weekend, everything is messed up with school right now...

I swear the one time I do things right... The outcome is unfavorable.

I'm really sad I can't visit but my brother isn't even returning my calls and I don't know if I would be able to see my niece. I'm so tired of stressful family stuff... Its mostly my brother and it just makes me so sad we can't ever have a nice holiday because he's there and we all fight or he's gone and my mom is sad. Now with the baby I just feel like he doesn't want us around her and she's the apple of my eye and I miss her so much.


My health insurance is actually paying for my hearing aids and I'm wondering where the h they are. I can't hear anything in class and I basically sit and don't talk to anyone because I can never hear.


Both of these things combined are making it hard for me not to turn into a pile of mush.



I will be visiting blo and have hearing aids by mid March or else. :o(

i have wanted to get my nose pierced forever and just never did. i had my eyebrow pierced a long time ago which isn't for me anymore and i'm definitely not into tattoos or anything.

at first i was pretty shocked and thought it was too big but now i think i love it.... it's a real diamond in there.

if work or the school that i intern at get upset i'll just say i'm hindu now and it's part of my religion and culture.