Drama girls that participate on this site - you know who you are. I'm declaring a full assault on the utter and complete fucking BULLSHIT spouted on this site.
There has been a contingent on this site that have approached me "offline" to release the hounds and tell some of you hapless females the truth. So - I've decided to do so. I will do so completely uninvited... a few of you are so in need of a straight guy to give it to you double barrels, unfiltered, real and raw, that I can't stand to sit by and watch/read any of this anymore.
Sometimes, you simply need to hear that you should give it up - that he obviously doesn't want you. Sometimes you need to hear that chances are, if he isn't calling back, its because he's seen enough and has no interest in pursuing it further, unless it means he can get some sex from the deal. Sometimes, some of you don't realize that you may have nothing to offer the guy, yet have impossible, unrealistic expectations. Once in a while, you are actually right and the guy is a turd.
You want to know the truth? Ask me before I tell you. There are some ladies reading this right now that may be thinking I'm talking about them, and chances are you are correct - if it is so I'll say it. I want to do this because, for those certain ladies I'm talking about, I think you're incredibly sexy, attractive women that need to be told two things. Firstly, that you're fucking sexy and any guy would be lucky to have you, if they bothered to dig deep enough and can live with any personality conflicts. I think you are hot. Secondly, and this is the hard part, that your attitude needs to change if you don't want to be single or constantly in and out of relationships when you're 40. While I can't guarantee success with relationships, what I can guarantee is that you'll get uncomfortably blunt yet necessary information that will help you along in your quest to find someone relatively permanent. If you don't ask me, chances are I'll volunteer this information anyway as you post puzzling relationship-themed entries in your journal. As you realize that I was right, you'll rue me but secretly admit that you're glad that somebody told you.
You are going to get help, whether you like it or not. The time for wondering and guessing is over. The reason why you struggle is because nobody is telling you what you need to know. Be mad at me if you want, but just know that if I didn't think you were worth the effort I wouldn't bother saying anything at all.
I want to tell a not-so-secret secret right now about the Ho sisters. There is a lot more than meets the eye with these two fine ladies. One is the older sister who tells it to you straight, and the younger sister is the one that nobody realizes has a lot more depth to her than people bother to try to find out about. I thrive on learning what makes people tick. Ladies, what is so wrong about starting out with who you are, rather than who you imagine the guy across the table wants to meet?
Joshua's Journal
My Podcast Link
08/13/2007 02:05 #40507
Drama Girls08/09/2007 15:14 #40454
Yawn.I'm tired. WHO'S WITH ME?!
kookcity2000 - 08/10/07 01:25
goddamn *sick* and tired... of motorists not signaling properly
goddamn *sick* and tired... of motorists not signaling properly
mrmike - 08/09/07 21:28
Thought it was just me
Thought it was just me
tinypliny - 08/09/07 21:07
Hmm.. I am just cold. Tomorrow is Friday, just thinking about it makes me "not tired". :)
Hmm.. I am just cold. Tomorrow is Friday, just thinking about it makes me "not tired". :)
chico - 08/09/07 15:55
this whole week i've been dragging ass, no idea why.
this whole week i've been dragging ass, no idea why.
drew - 08/09/07 15:44
me too.
me too.
jenks - 08/09/07 15:42
me. big time.
me. big time.
08/08/2007 11:55 #40441
I just got headhunted!I can't believe this, but a recruiter from Bentonville, Ark. just called our office to talk to me about quitting my job and going to work for a New York-based contractor to "Uncle Wally." Basically what they need is someone who knows their way around Retail Link, which is an in-house, web based utility that allows "Uncle Wally" to talk to its customers.
Straight up, after talking to this guy about my background for a few minutes, he asked me directly what terms it would take to get me to quit my job. He also told me that he would have something lined up that was good enough to make it impossible to ignore.
I know that these people are recruiters and they get paid on their ability to deliver qualified candidates, but I thought it was the damnedest thing that he was calling me directly at my office, while I was working, to get me to quit!
What he doesn't know is that this piece of fruit is ripe for the picking, but why give up that information to a recruiter right away? I prefer to see what he's offering before showing any cards.
In any case, my coworker says that I should at least listen to what he has to say. His company hires people that have had direct experience with Wal-MartcoughcoughcoughUNCLEWALLY, so I figure at the least I'll keep his company in mind when I'm going to jump ship and want to move. The typical position his company hires for have salary ranges between $60k-$140k, and if I can develop a good rapport with the recruiter, even if I don't take this particular job, I'm sure he'll consider me in the future.
Straight up, after talking to this guy about my background for a few minutes, he asked me directly what terms it would take to get me to quit my job. He also told me that he would have something lined up that was good enough to make it impossible to ignore.
I know that these people are recruiters and they get paid on their ability to deliver qualified candidates, but I thought it was the damnedest thing that he was calling me directly at my office, while I was working, to get me to quit!
What he doesn't know is that this piece of fruit is ripe for the picking, but why give up that information to a recruiter right away? I prefer to see what he's offering before showing any cards.
In any case, my coworker says that I should at least listen to what he has to say. His company hires people that have had direct experience with Wal-MartcoughcoughcoughUNCLEWALLY, so I figure at the least I'll keep his company in mind when I'm going to jump ship and want to move. The typical position his company hires for have salary ranges between $60k-$140k, and if I can develop a good rapport with the recruiter, even if I don't take this particular job, I'm sure he'll consider me in the future.
metalpeter - 08/08/07 19:20
As soon as you said Bentonville I knew there was some wal mart connection since that is where they are headquatered and nothing else is really there at is famous or well known. What ever happens I wish you luck.
As soon as you said Bentonville I knew there was some wal mart connection since that is where they are headquatered and nothing else is really there at is famous or well known. What ever happens I wish you luck.
paul - 08/08/07 16:46
Congratulations on the offer. It feels good to be wanted. The same thing happened to me the other day at work. I was so freaked out to have somebody call me at work to get me to quit. They were all - is thee a better time to talk about his. Unfortunately, for them there is very little that would make me move to a private sector job - even for more money.
Congratulations on the offer. It feels good to be wanted. The same thing happened to me the other day at work. I was so freaked out to have somebody call me at work to get me to quit. They were all - is thee a better time to talk about his. Unfortunately, for them there is very little that would make me move to a private sector job - even for more money.
james - 08/08/07 16:11
Congrats on the offer.
Hope you can squeeze a few more out of them or someone else.
Congrats on the offer.
Hope you can squeeze a few more out of them or someone else.
leetee - 08/08/07 12:28
Hey, that's good news... and must be flattering as hell!
Hey, that's good news... and must be flattering as hell!
08/06/2007 15:17 #40409
Market Meltdown?A guy that I think is absolutely brilliant, a market savant - Jim Kramer - practically shit his pants on national television last Friday afternoon by going on a belligerent tirade over what he views is the Fed's complacency concerning a potential upcoming major market collapse. See it for yourself here -
Its obvious that this guy thinks that we are in for some major league economic trouble, and his solution is for the Fed to cut rates. Some people are put off by Kramer because of his rough around the edges approach to his show, but keep in mind that this guy has been in the market for 25 years and personally managed hundreds of millions of dollars for Goldman Sachs. If he wasn't such an insider I wouldn't be alarmed.
Its obvious that this guy thinks that we are in for some major league economic trouble, and his solution is for the Fed to cut rates. Some people are put off by Kramer because of his rough around the edges approach to his show, but keep in mind that this guy has been in the market for 25 years and personally managed hundreds of millions of dollars for Goldman Sachs. If he wasn't such an insider I wouldn't be alarmed.
joshua - 08/10/07 14:03
I haven't mentioned it yet, but this Tuesday during the drive time All Things Considered on NPR, guess who was the A-1 story? Cramer - which I thought was interesting because I had heard/read about this in other media as well. He made a stink that I think is legitimate. Todays news? The Fed is dumping extra cash on a temporary basis into the bank system and there are rumors of an "emergency" meeting at the Fed to discuss possibly doing something with the interest rate.
I haven't mentioned it yet, but this Tuesday during the drive time All Things Considered on NPR, guess who was the A-1 story? Cramer - which I thought was interesting because I had heard/read about this in other media as well. He made a stink that I think is legitimate. Todays news? The Fed is dumping extra cash on a temporary basis into the bank system and there are rumors of an "emergency" meeting at the Fed to discuss possibly doing something with the interest rate.
chico - 08/10/07 09:44
A somewhat technical article in the Economist that discusses the international fallout from the anxiety over subprime mortgages in the US seems to add credibility to Jim Cramer's freak-out session:
:::link:::
Here's the concluding sentences:
"Even cuts in interest rates ... would not necessarily address the underlying problem. Restoring faith in American mortgage markets, and the cornucopia of investments derived from them, is the bigger challenge. To do that, many had hoped this week that Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, America's two government-sponsored mortgage giants, could step in and mop up some of the subprime loans that the private sector is too fearful to buy. But President George Bush appeared to dismiss such a response on August 8th, which may be another reason why the markets so suddenly lost their nerves once again."
A somewhat technical article in the Economist that discusses the international fallout from the anxiety over subprime mortgages in the US seems to add credibility to Jim Cramer's freak-out session:
:::link:::
Here's the concluding sentences:
"Even cuts in interest rates ... would not necessarily address the underlying problem. Restoring faith in American mortgage markets, and the cornucopia of investments derived from them, is the bigger challenge. To do that, many had hoped this week that Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, America's two government-sponsored mortgage giants, could step in and mop up some of the subprime loans that the private sector is too fearful to buy. But President George Bush appeared to dismiss such a response on August 8th, which may be another reason why the markets so suddenly lost their nerves once again."
mrdeadlier - 08/10/07 09:21
I submit to you that what's more interesting is the fact that his co-host is dressed like a giraffe.
I submit to you that what's more interesting is the fact that his co-host is dressed like a giraffe.
dcoffee - 08/08/07 09:34
ouch.
ouch.
bloticsblog - 08/07/07 11:28
That's his schtick, but this seems a bit more genuine. He's damned near foaming. I'm with you on the whole, "this insider's flipping out, so maybe we should take notice" thing.
That's his schtick, but this seems a bit more genuine. He's damned near foaming. I'm with you on the whole, "this insider's flipping out, so maybe we should take notice" thing.
drew - 08/06/07 16:37
wow. I've never seen him like this. And he makes sense. Well, not where he says he can't get a loan.
wow. I've never seen him like this. And he makes sense. Well, not where he says he can't get a loan.
joshua - 08/06/07 15:45
Yeah, it is definitely his schtick, although the past few years he's mellowed out some. I've never seen him quite this bad before.
Yeah, it is definitely his schtick, although the past few years he's mellowed out some. I've never seen him quite this bad before.
chico - 08/06/07 15:33
Isn't getting worked up into a lather Jim Kramer's shtick?
Isn't getting worked up into a lather Jim Kramer's shtick?
08/04/2007 11:16 #40373
DefloweredOn a whim I decided to drive by Guercio's this morning to see if it was open.
I'm not terribly proud to admit this, but I've lived in Buffalo since the summer of 1996 and I've never been to Guercio's. I know the place by reputation, yet still after checking it out for the first time I was astounded. Really and truly, we have a first class local market... I don't have enough superlatives to accurately describe the place. I suppose the most succinct way for me to put it is that after seeing it first hand, it was plainly obvious to me why the local high end restaurants swear by the place.
Fruits and produce - first class. They have certain things that you'll never find in a supermarket, and in exceptional condition. The things that really stood out to me were some of the hard to find fruits, the pepper selection, the cheeses, the prepackaged nuts and such that you could make trail mix from... and cheap, too. I felt like I stepped back 20 years to the markets that you used to see that have been gobbled up by places like Wegman's. Isn't it ironic that now Weg is being undercut by Wal-Mart? Its like a capitalistic circle of life where the smaller fish are always being eaten up by the bigger fish.
In any case, I'll be going back many, many times. And its actually more convenient for me to go there rather than Wegman's. Granted, there are some things that are missing that I'll still be making trips to the Co-op and such for, but for once its good to know that there are still local, highest possible quality places that charge fair prices and have no fear of survival. After leaving Guercio's (and after grabbing one of those $2 personal pizzas, couldn't leave without one) I felt proud that our city has something like this available to us.
I know that we have some newer residents that have been journaling on the strip... if you haven't yet made it to Guercio's and you need tomatoes, or plan on making fruit salad, or need some good cheese for that pasta, making a dessert, or are simply in need of some basics - or if you want $5 free trade olive oil like (e:paul) mentioned - make an excuse and go check it out. You will not be disappointed, I promise. My only bit of fair warning that I'd dish out is that this morning parking was ATROCIOUS down there. I lucked out so hard by getting a spot directly in front of the store. It was incredibly busy this morning and I can only assume that its always that way. So - be prepared for a hard time parking. Regardless, its still worth the trip. Its on Grant St. between Lafayette and Delevan.
I'm not terribly proud to admit this, but I've lived in Buffalo since the summer of 1996 and I've never been to Guercio's. I know the place by reputation, yet still after checking it out for the first time I was astounded. Really and truly, we have a first class local market... I don't have enough superlatives to accurately describe the place. I suppose the most succinct way for me to put it is that after seeing it first hand, it was plainly obvious to me why the local high end restaurants swear by the place.
Fruits and produce - first class. They have certain things that you'll never find in a supermarket, and in exceptional condition. The things that really stood out to me were some of the hard to find fruits, the pepper selection, the cheeses, the prepackaged nuts and such that you could make trail mix from... and cheap, too. I felt like I stepped back 20 years to the markets that you used to see that have been gobbled up by places like Wegman's. Isn't it ironic that now Weg is being undercut by Wal-Mart? Its like a capitalistic circle of life where the smaller fish are always being eaten up by the bigger fish.
In any case, I'll be going back many, many times. And its actually more convenient for me to go there rather than Wegman's. Granted, there are some things that are missing that I'll still be making trips to the Co-op and such for, but for once its good to know that there are still local, highest possible quality places that charge fair prices and have no fear of survival. After leaving Guercio's (and after grabbing one of those $2 personal pizzas, couldn't leave without one) I felt proud that our city has something like this available to us.
I know that we have some newer residents that have been journaling on the strip... if you haven't yet made it to Guercio's and you need tomatoes, or plan on making fruit salad, or need some good cheese for that pasta, making a dessert, or are simply in need of some basics - or if you want $5 free trade olive oil like (e:paul) mentioned - make an excuse and go check it out. You will not be disappointed, I promise. My only bit of fair warning that I'd dish out is that this morning parking was ATROCIOUS down there. I lucked out so hard by getting a spot directly in front of the store. It was incredibly busy this morning and I can only assume that its always that way. So - be prepared for a hard time parking. Regardless, its still worth the trip. Its on Grant St. between Lafayette and Delevan.
leetee - 08/04/07 23:14
i feel fortunate to live so close, down on Bird Ave., not too far a walk and an even closer bike ride.
they also have a parking lot across from the store, beside the church if the street is full. up or down a single block, or Lafayette, there is always parking.
i feel fortunate to live so close, down on Bird Ave., not too far a walk and an even closer bike ride.
they also have a parking lot across from the store, beside the church if the street is full. up or down a single block, or Lafayette, there is always parking.
tinypliny - 08/04/07 12:41
I have been in Buffalo for a month now and I have been to Guercio's every single week and sometimes twice a week. I am addicted to their produce and I always meet so many interesting people there! I have learned of 3 new recipes for banana peppers, spinach and zucchini in this past month from poeple I have randomly met and started talking to. I love the place. It is easily the best local market I have seen here in the States. Buffalo is indeed unique in having such a wonderful store to shop in.
I have been in Buffalo for a month now and I have been to Guercio's every single week and sometimes twice a week. I am addicted to their produce and I always meet so many interesting people there! I have learned of 3 new recipes for banana peppers, spinach and zucchini in this past month from poeple I have randomly met and started talking to. I love the place. It is easily the best local market I have seen here in the States. Buffalo is indeed unique in having such a wonderful store to shop in.
james - 08/04/07 12:19
I went there for the first time two weeks ago and have been back three times since. So delicious. So good!
Please check out there Gondola brand pasta products. They are made in Buffalo and are so freakin' good. The Ravioli is the best 15 minute meal, and Rachel Ray can just shove her crap. The saffron noodles with a little sliced beef and a touch of cream sauce and makes my heart explode with delight (and saturated fat). I have a package of their pepper noodles I can't wait to try.
I think I now go to Wegmans for asprin, mescaline salad mix (the loose is organic and cheaper than the convention packaged, awesome).
Glad you finally went.
I went there for the first time two weeks ago and have been back three times since. So delicious. So good!
Please check out there Gondola brand pasta products. They are made in Buffalo and are so freakin' good. The Ravioli is the best 15 minute meal, and Rachel Ray can just shove her crap. The saffron noodles with a little sliced beef and a touch of cream sauce and makes my heart explode with delight (and saturated fat). I have a package of their pepper noodles I can't wait to try.
I think I now go to Wegmans for asprin, mescaline salad mix (the loose is organic and cheaper than the convention packaged, awesome).
Glad you finally went.
(e:jenks) - I know! I'm sorry - right after I typed those words I got banged over the head with things to finish before I leave for a work trip to Toronto tomorrow morning. I promise I'll write... it will go to whatever e-mail it is that I've written to you before through.
(e:libertad) - I could never pretend to understand the dynamics of "cock on cock" (ha!) relationships but the one thing I would hope is that there is less drama than the "cock on sock" relationships.
I'm not being exclusionary by any means - I'm just talking about my own view from a hetero male perspective. Really - if you or any one else feels like they have something to offer then by all means! I've heard girls say that they wish they could just be told straight up from their targets what the story is. So, I'm going to serve it up from that perspective.
USmail, or email? b/c i ain't done got nuttin, yet!
Don't be silly leetee. I don't think you or josh are anti-gay in any way. In the future however, I'll remember that your bisexual advice couldn't possibly be as valuable as a gay man's advice when it comes to my gay, man on man, cock on cock relationships that you or josh know nothing about. hehe ;)
(E:Libertad), please don't mistake what i was trying to say as anything that is pro-hetero or even anti gay.
I think that if Josh were a gay man and the person complaining was complaining about their relationships with other gay men, then it would be the same thing. Exactly the same as him being hetro and giving the perspective to women who are also attracted to hetro men (which doesn't mean they are hetro, they could be bi).
Sometimes, getting the opinion of the person who shares the same preferences is a good thing... 'cause the truth be told, i cannot tell you what it is like to be a man, gay, straight bi. I just know what it is like to be a woman, who happens to have dated men and women herself!
Ok. If your post was in someway reflecting on (e:jenks) than more or less I gave her the same advice minus all the extra words. I just see the situation as a human one rather than just something that affects only straights. If for some reason whoever this post is about feels that the message is more validating coming from a straight than I guess you and leetee are right.
I think we agree too. Just sounded, in general, like you were bitching that people were bitching.
(e:libertad) - sexuality has nothing much to do with it really, outside of the idea that once in a while I think some blunt honesty from somebody who is the same sexuality and sex as the person they are targeting is worth it. Consider this - how many straight guys *ever* bother to offer what I'm offering to these frustrated women? Its an extremely rare perspective. In other words, what (e:lee) said!
(e:lee) - I fully recognize (and practice myself) the right to bitching and complaining about anything we participants feel like in our own journals. I'm not really sure that we actually disagree at all, which is why I was puzzled that you mentioned the stuff that you did. By saying "I can't stand by and watch/read this anymore" that is not a suggestion by me that these ladies should keep it to themselves... all I'm saying is that I'm interjecting my own perspective as a result of or response to the confusion and frustration over the guys, generated from my own frustration from seeing some ladies miss what I think is obvious.
(e:UCSF) - I was puzzled a little bit by your response so I went back and read what I wrote. It was innaccurate for me to say that somebody nudged me in that direction... nobody "makes" me do a damn thing in this life. I suppose its more accurate to say that after speaking with people outside of the site that are reading a lot of this man frustration I'm realizing that I'm not alone in my thoughts and as a result I'm stepping up to the plate to offer my perspective, which some of these girls need in the most dire way.
As for naming names - thats fucking ridiculous - its not going to happen and its as simple as that. To what end? It serves no appreciable purpose. If we exposed the sources and trails of all the rampant gossip that happens as a result of (e:strip) we'd be here for years. Its not exactly news that people talk about each other (both positively and negatively) outside of the site. Its one of the aspects of journaling here that I have disliked enough in the past to consider simply quiting participating on (e:strip). I prefer to believe that if you can't saying anything positive about somebody then you shouldn't say anything at all. (Except polititians and public figures). The truth is, though, that this is an unrealistic and difficult policy to put into practice. Some people are better at it than others - that is human nature! A negative aspect of the internet is being able to participate with a degree of anonymity. Its not my job to tell somebody what someone else thinks about them. If they want to speak up, that is their problem to sort out. Personally, I just tell people what I think and don't really care too much about the consequences.
(e:jenks) - check your mail! I am about to send you something, including but not limited to compliments. =D
A blunt no bullshit journal deserves a blunt no bullshit response. So here goes:
What's up with all this secrecy? Why did this anonymous "contingent on this site" ask you to do their dirty work for them? Why can't this "contingent" post their feelings directly? Are they so ashamed of feelings that they have to hide behind the cloak of anonymity? Or they just cowards who don't have the courage to say publicly what they have apparently said to you privately?
Anyone can post pretty much anything they want on this website. Since you say they are "on this site" I just don't get why they just don't write about this in their journals. What are they afraid of? And, for that matter, why don't you name names? Why not share with the world the identities of the "drama girls" and "this contingent"?
I think that people with nothing to hide, hide nothing.
(e:Libertad), i don't think sexuality has anything to do with the issue in general. Sometimes, an opinion from someone among the population one is attracted to can be valuable.
I just don't understand what someone's sexuality has to do with any of this.
I agree with everything you say here -- tough love and full barrel hetro honesty from a man to a hetro woman is sometimes needed. I do believe, with every fiber of my being, that if someone here came to you and asked for advice or opinion, you would give it with kind but brutal honesty.
That said...
This is a journaling site. Just as i think you have a right to say every word you said -- and keep in mind, i agree with the sentiment of all of it -- i think the women who are complaining about their relationships have just as much right to do so.
Not all of what is read here is who we are. It's just the parts we either need to get off our chests, or the part of us we wish others to see.
I have to say I agree with your tough love approach!
Also, I agree that sometimes tough love is necessary. Like when Imk posted about how sometimes it isn't because a chick is flaky, or anything like that, they just don't like you that way, for whatever reason, and that is okay. Hurt the pride for a moment, but it's easier and makes more sense to me to just accept certain things about life that you cannot control. I grew from that.
Along the same vein there I also agree that tough love is still love, and it shows you care more and are more engaged, and are more of a friend when you can tell it how it is.
Well, imk, turds do get results, maybe not the results I want long-term though. =) Still I have some things to iron out. I still don't think I'm boyfriend material. I'm hoping within a year that will change. But don't worry, I'm not purging my sweetness! I've tried and it is impossible.
I agree that the tactics employed by Mr. Fade Away are shitty and childish. Unfortunately people still want to do what's easy instead of doing what's right. I'm sure we've all been in that position.
Be the change you want to see in the world.
Eh, maybe that's just cheesy sloganeering, but it's a start, right? That's what I'm trying to do.
hell, I agree with you josh- whether or not you're talking about me, the info certainly applies.
But I still think the "don't-return-calls" fade-away approach of ending things is shitty, and that the decent thing to do is just sit down and talk like two adults. Like you said- blunt and painful, but I think you have to respect each other and be honest.
otherwise things (can) just drag on and on and on and on... and I am a case in point. Yes, I should walk away. But he keeps giving me glimmers of hope, which makes it tough...
But I agree with yvonne 100%. Be who you are. You don't want someone who wants you b/c you're pretending to be something else.
I certainly don't think all guys are turds, but I also don't think they're any better/worse than their female counterparts.
i totally disagree. turd guys do not get results! and if they do, than that is the kind of girl you dont want to be messing with in the first place. stay sweet and you will get a sweet girl.
based on what I've seen, most of the time guys ARE turds. that is what gets results.
you should post the link to that article