It really is that simple - if you read celeb magazines you are rotting your brain and are partially responsible for the death of Princess Diana, IMO. Quite literally, paparazzi and the photos that are the fuel for this lower rung on our social ladder are the death of people sometimes.

Yahoo has a celeb site called, hilariously enough, OMG! - omg.yahoo.com. Not that I'm advertising it or anything - you know better coming from me. The implication is that by reading this tripe you are attempting to live vicariously through these celebrities, or perhaps to simply trash the celebs out of jealousy or other petty bullshit. Or perhaps to get fashion tips. Here's a tip for you - oversized sunglasses are fucking ugly on chicks - don't wear them. We are suspicious that you are covering your face for, sadly, a good reason. Stop perpetuating this utterly sad reality... make friends, go get laid, have your own story for crying out loud. Its not that fucking hard!

Anyway, lets have some fun, shall we?

OMG! Here is Courtney Love, looking like a bag lady and bumming a light from, ironically enough, a paparazzo. Not that Courtney Love has *ever* looked like anything but a bag lady.



OMG! Its Justin Timberlake and he's about to pump his own gas!



OMG! Its Britney Spears and, like omg, isn't she so fat?



OMG! Its David Beckham, the single most recognizable face on earth, unless you live under a rock, waiting in line at a coffee shop! You mean to say that he doesn't have some lackey run in for his latte? Oh, and isn't he like, omg, steaming hot? (Tee Hee, forgive the atrocious coffee pun, but it fit in with the absurd nature of these photographs)



No wonder people stereotype Americans as bubbleheads, full of our own shit and know nothing (nor care much) about the world. Given the popularity of this kind of cultural dookie, how could we defend ourselves from such a comment?

(e:imk2) loves hotel rooms so I wanted to post this for her, but I think this should get some general interest.

Do you ever feel the need to relive the heady, halcyon days of the German Democratic Republic and the Stasi? Have you ever wanted to sleep in a drab, suffocating, depressing and somewhat prisonlike room representative of typical late 80's East German apartments with portraits of guys such as this over your bed?



Erich Honecker, Grand Poobah of German Communists

Well, my friends, your dream can be a reality. The next time you stop in Berlin, stay at the Ostel hotel - - and you and your comrades will not be disappointed. East Germany had the biggest economy of the Warsaw Pact nations, which is sort of like saying that they were the biggest turd in a toilet full of shit. The typical accomodations were spartan (very polite way of putting it but accurate) at the time and have been lovingly recreated for your enjoyment. Check this out - there is something disturbing yet inherently awesome with this concept. There are more pictures at the Ostel website as well, if you're curiosity simply can't be contained.



For about $80 you can stay in the Stasi suite, which is complete with period bugging devices. I wonder if they artificially filter television broadcasts to eliminate "immoral and subversive" content to heighten the realism.



The outside of the hotel. You won't see Soviet-era block housing architecture this legit anywhere east of the Balkans - except for Berlin! My lord this picture is depressing.



For a little more than $50 a night you get something more like this.



Here is an example of a double bed (sort of, two small beds combined) in a brightly patterned room with a portrait of a former East German Prime Minister.



Examples of authentic commie goodies that the hotel supplies, just in case you miss that Soviet-imported fun when you were a kid.

Another room that the hotel supplies is known as the "Pioneer Camp" - it simply has to be seen to be believed and I'd recommend going to the website to see it, and more pictures of all of the rooms for that matter. Bunk beds, baby, in a communal style setting with bananas in the ashtray, similarly drab appointments and an artificial feeling that life will never get better. Only 9 euros per person - of course, this isn't really East Germany anymore so fully expect your typical European nickeling and diming with respect to linens, room cleaning and food charges. They love "the struggle" but not that much - no discounts or mercy for the proletariat.

Whats this - you didn't realize that there were a plethora of polls and debates going on for the presidential election next year? Don't worry - a vast majority of the nation is still asleep on this fact as well. I'm not particularly sure why polls and debates started so early this time around, and to be honest I don't really care. Ultimately, since this has been going on for months now, NONE of what has been going on politically has been compelling on any meaningful level. Democrats have been at this for several months, and nothing has changed. Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama have raised millions of dollars and in fact Democrats have outraised Republicans to the tune of $100 million - this to me is staggering and reflects the fact that a) Democrats are very committed to winning in '08, and b) Republicans are completely uninterested in the short list of candidates they are left with. Republicans have been left wanting - largely the party faithful has shown lukewarm interest in the candidates presented to them. I think the guy will be Fred Thompson and you'll see a massive numbers spike in polls and donations received.

A couple days ago CNN hosted a Democratic Party debate with the assistance of YouTube, which I think is an interesting spin on how to take questions. The cynical side of me cannot ignore that in the end these debates always end up the same - the questions are filtered, the candidates won't answer questions directly and as a result nobody learns anything new about the candidates that would help voters make a decision. I'm going to illustrate to you why these debates are useless regardless of the method of asking the question. Watch -



This is a textbook example of what I hate about politicians. When she is asked about the definition of liberal the first few words out of her mouth are straight up, unfiltered bullshit, like taking 3 warm shots of Crown Royal with no chaser. Mrs. Clinton is definitely not alone - all politicians do this regardless of party and I could have easily used a different example. What the fuck is she talking about - "liberal" used to mean the opposite of big government and individual freedom? Did she even think through what she was saying or does she actually believe that liberals used to be more like Republicans? In other words, she answered the question but in doing so used flowery and meaningless language. Following that, some guy with no chance in hell of winning takes a pot shot at Barack Obama, and Obama responds in kind.

I have to ask again - how does any of this help voters make a better decision about who to pick? How relevant of a question was this to ask anyway? This is probably the most important presidential election of the past 35-40 years and this is the type of question that CNN chose to ask the candidates? Another question that boggled my mind - are African Americans going to receive reparations for slavery? First of all, the answer to that question is obvious - no. Secondly, this sort of question is by no means representative of the most important issues of the day. By the way, it was noted that not ONE question regarding how to handle illegal immigration passed through CNN's filter. When the questions are atrocious and the answers are even worse, who cares how "innovative" the questions are delivered? Again, its because these debates are ultimately meaningless. What about asking Democratic candidates about the ramifications of pulling out of Iraq ASAP, something the influential activists and liberals everywhere are begging for? None of the Democrats will actually answer that question.

It is intriguing to me that in passing recently Mr. Edwards suggested cornering out the weaker opposition to Mrs. Clinton. Hey John, YOU are the weaker opposition. Mr. Edwards' main topic is poverty, aka the class divide known as "the two Americas" that most observers are very familiar with, since it was the exact same topic that lost him the nomination in '04. The problems Edwards faces are twofold - a) he's a fabulously rich guy talking about poverty, and b) his own vanity, which was best captured in the following video -

• in my best blatantly gay voice* - Just tease it a little, tease it!

Stuff like this is incredibly damaging to a politicians prospects. Coupled with the news about how much his haircuts cost, he has absolutely no credibility with the people he is trying to woo for votes. Granted, although rich people are completely oblivious to the needs of the poor, I don't think it should preclude them from shining a light on the issue. RFK and FDR are two examples of rich guys that had credibility with the poor. Unfortunately, John Edwards is no RFK or FDR. To his credit, as a wealthy liberal that lives an astoundingly wasteful lifestyle, he isn't preaching to us about lifestyle changes to curb global warming.

At the moment, Democratic politics are dominated by a cult of personality, obsession with polling results and the desire to see Bush out office, none of which make compelling reasons to vote for a candidate. At the moment, and I can't believe I'm saying this, the only Democrat making any sense at all is actually Joe Biden, one of the most entrenched blowhard Washington insiders in the Senate. Granted, all politicans are basically the same, but Biden, in my view, is the straightest talker and the most level headed. A few years ago Biden suggested what in essence would be a "United States of Iraq" with subregions created based on ethnicity. How badly he was poo-pooed at the time - as time passes by he is looking wiser and wiser.

Get involved - voter apathy, in my opinion anyway, is a mockery of a basic freedom that many in the world don't individually hold. Go get information on the candidates by checking out their web sites, reading their ideas, finding out how they vote on issues that are important to you. Just don't expect to learn much from debates until the nominees are chosen.

Here is a picture of me - complete with as close to aviators as the Simpson character generator gets.



Pale emo guy -



A couple goofy looking guys -





And my interpretation of Hillary Clinton!

Seriously - it can't get any better than this.





A puppy born with a patch of fur in the shape of a heart! This little fella is a baby chihuahua from northern Japan.