I wrote my journal last night at like 11 so I only got a star for a half hour. So read the journal below, I even learned some Illustrator just to make the bloddy graphics. Well, I also want to post my outrage that we have barred non-Iraq-war-supporting-countries from receiving any contracts for the rebuilding of the country. It's so obvious what it's really all about. If we cared about Iraq we would give the contracts to the lowest bidders and not to those closest to our Administration. Grrr.

My new thought for today. It came to me through the somehow tranquil state of laundry, folding the pants, coming to grip with the facts of order and chaos, the entropy that I was folding out of my clothes, expending my own precious metabolized potential energy, balancing systems. The real thought is that at any moment the options of possibilities are limited by the history of a moment ago. History is the cement locking in all past chosen options. Even perfect in its order. And then we have the next choice to make by reaching out into the sea of infinite, though currently limited, choices. This of course is the dillema, even the oxymoron, of limited infinity. Must not an infinity have no limits, isn't that the definition? A conunudrum, a system that within itself presents boundless choice, yet which itself is bound in a moment of historical timespace. I think of an atom. Every particle within the atom exists at every moment, but the farther we break down the scale, the more we are unable to define the precise location of any individual particle. The more precise our measurements the more indeterminate our readings become. Now back to our systems, representing the infinite options limited by the previous history. The individual particles (whatever they might be, ie: quarks, electrons, gravitrons, alpha particles-every year we find more) represent our choices that we can make. And, just as we know that they exist and are found in this specific location (within one atom/proton/electron/etc.) we are unable with any precision to map the coordinates. It seems as if they are existing at no one space and every space at the same time. How this fits in is that there seems to be an infinite variety of choice these particles have at every moment as to where they are, though they are limited to existing within a single atom. Again, infinite but limited choice. Bound at the macro end of the scale but having no limit on the micro.

Where along the number line does infinity begin? If we start drawing the first line at 1 and go forever, then start another line at 2, is the first line longer than the second?

Or if we take our number line and begin one line at 1, direction positive and another at -1 direction negative, do these lines ever touch?

Yet aren't they both infinite in length. Which leads us to the knowledge that there is not just one infinity, rather an infinite number of separate infinities. From here, we can go anywhere; multiple universes, universes within universes, fractal universes! But it also means that though our reality is constantly being shaped by our actions, every moment gives us an infinity of possible choices. Choose wisely, you only have one chance.

So recently Bush, while in the Oval office standing next to the Chinese prime minister, declared his support of Taiwanese non-action and fence-sitting. Taiwan is, of course, ruled by China (I'm not sure what the official nomencalture is, maybe protectorate or something) though it operates somewhat autonomously on domestic affairs. Recently the new president of Taiwan was popularly elected, running largley on a platform of Chinese independence. Well, now he's started to act, starting the process of calling for a national referendum on the subject of Chinese ballistic missiles targeted at the island, as well as generally moving towards ultimate independence.
In his statement bush says, "the comments and actions made by the leader of Taiwan indicate that he may be willing to make decisions unilaterally to change the status quo, which we oppose." Of course this is a democracy chilling pronouncement from the supposed leader of the free world, but this is to be expected. What is more surprising and ironic is his focus on Taiwan's president's decision to act "unilaterally to change the status quo". Hello? Maybe he's forgotten when he stood opposed to popular world opinion and its head body, the UN, on the issue of Iraq. Oh, and that little ole Kyoto Protocol, the ICBM treaties... In fact when it comes to leaders acting unilaterally, without the support of world opinion, often without even domestic popular opinion, our President has to top the pack. I guess when it comes down to it, none of this is surprising, our foreign policy is always aimed at supporting those who make business good, regardless of their oppresive regimes (when not because of their oppressive regimes). Bush is just doing that, caring about America's (at least the top 1%'s) interests, so why can't he see that Taiwan's president has the same responsibility (probably with more equitable aim)?

So anyways today at work this 70 year old woman is complaining about a bill that she has to pay because she paid late and there is interest due now. The broad makes like a million dollars a year (no joke) and actually says to me, "okay, i'll pay. I'll just have to eat canned corn beef and hash, but I'll be brave." Can we say unmitigated gall?! To a worker that has made like 1/20th of her annual income in his entire life. Sheesh, reaffirms my belief in the rich elite conspiracy theories and why it's okay to hate and/or eat them, though who wants gout anyways.

The Washington Post, and Democracy Now!, report on 37 military linguists, fluent in Arabic, discharged for being gay. It seems ironic that at this time of terror anyone who speaks Arabic (the language of terror) would be let go. Of course we know what happens to all those good ole boys in the army once gays are around. Yup, they get gay themselves. And who wants more gays? Apparently the supposed gay pheromone is responsible for the quick grasp these gay soldiers have taken on Arabic. Military scientists at DARPA have begun tests to analyze, sparate, and reengineer this miracle language enhancing trait, which apparently is only secreted from those who refrain from telling when they aren't asked, but can't get those damn wrists straight.

Apparently we raised about $7,000. Whoopie! Huge success for democracy and freedom of the press right here in B-lo.

Just read Shawn's latest piece and have to agree that atheists (maybe more correctly non-christians) are on a day-to-day basis discriminated in society. A personal example involves my workplace, where we are encouraged to decorate our workspace for the holidays. Recently I had a discussion with the "lunch crowd" about this issue, and was, well not really surprised, but still amazed at the staunchess of held opinions. We were talking about decorations and how everyone has a right to decorate their area how they want it, according to their beliefs. Their was a Jewish woman at the table who started by saying it was somewhat daunting to come into the office and be confronted by row after row of Christmas decorations, and some rather graphic representations of Jesus, Mary and the rest. Most of the table did not agree with her, a few even snorted disdainfully. I came in next that on the same token if I was a Satan worshipper and decided to display upside down crosses and bloody die Jesus stickers they would all soon feel very offended as well. I believe at this point I was told that there was a difference between that kind of belief or something like that. In other words there wasn't a problem with Christmas decor becuase almost all of them were Christian. It's the problem with the majority, maybe even with democracy. The majority wins and their views are respected to the exclusion of other beliefs. To me it was just astonishing that no one could even see the point I was trying to make, even in an academic kind of way, to them it was a no-brainer: Christmas is good, good people like Christmas. Truly a case of atheist (more correctly non-Christian) discrimination.

I wanna go hoam too.

Yo Yo YO!

So da party rocked the house and took the roof off. Amy came and was just as fantabulastic as she always is on the show. She mesmerized an audience of over 200 fellow Bufallonians for an hour with straightforward facts about the state of our media and concomitant/codependent democracy. We sat on the floor, fitting somehow, listening to a succinct monologue of offenses against our right to free speech and an informed press. We ate wonderful mostly vegan cuisine provided by Coop housers Emily and Kevin, and yours trizuly (which was made only slightly less gourmet by the buffalo wing smell permeating the room-apparently the union workers strike if there aint no wings). Amy ate of food from my hand. Probably right now little cells of my substance are slowly being digested before incorporation into her greater whole. Yes, I am now a part of democracy's voice. Hail me faithful subjects as I (through my host specimen Amy) strive to lift veils of obscuring corporate curtains from the eyes of your minds. Yea, Oh, Verily, and Behold. Apparently I no longer need to get high to write rambling nonsense-yay. So I think it went great. Over 200 people at $10-$20 average ticket price equals at least $3000, and that's assuming no one put in at Patriot ($100) level. So maybe we made $5000-that's a year of Democracy Now! I won't be surprised, and am so glad that this, my first real activist effort, seems to be turning out so positively. Maybe I should stop being such a negative old fartmudgeon. Nah, all my friends would miss my cynicism I am sure. Though between Holly and I we are over the top sometimes. One of these days when we're bemoaning our sorry fates someon's gonna take our advice and shoot us, and we'll deserve it. Amy is shorter than I expected-aren't they always? Her face was kind. She ate my cells. Not too many though, just enough for germination. God, I hope she doesn't read this somehow. Do you think others share this fascination with her? I should look. I'll post later the results.

First of all shoutout to P-Diggy for the handy new pop-up feature. Whoopie-doodle-dandy! But really, what I'm here to talk about is the holidays. I've been having many thoughts around this topic lately. They stem from an uncomfortableness that I always feel around this time of year when I see the first decorations go up and hear of the vast array of sales approaching. The thing about holidays is that many have legitamate backgrounds and meanings behind them, but have been transformed and mutilated into shooping sprees and consumer frenzy. Ask a kid what Christman is about and they're gonna say gifts. Grownups will give you the bit about family, holiday cheer, and maybe even mention Jesus, but get them started and you'll end up talking about shopping, sales, and decorations, in other words, what really matters. And this is what I can't stand. Take a holiday, like Christmas, which to me already doesn't mean much given I'm not a Christian, add the layer of American consumerism and I'm ready to barf. It's so fake. The only part I like is getting together with the family and what not, but I hate the feeling that the only reason we do it is tradition. Same with gift giving, fun idea, but do I really like these people, do they like me, or do they feel that they are supposed to recognize something because the calender tells them to. The worst offender in this respect is cards. Boy, oh boy, do cards drive me crazy. Such a meaningless, canned message, throw away after a week thing to send. I don't know you enough to find a cheap gift you'll like nor anything nice that I'm willing to spend the money on, in fact, I can't even think of a few words to say, so I'll just give you a cheesy picture with a poem on it that a guy in a cubicle made $50 thinking up, but really, I do care enough to sign my name with a big cursive LOVE above it. And the best is, depending on the holiday, you'll likely find a shiny bill nesteld in the folds. Just use the table printed below to find out what denomination:
Birthday: $50
Christmas: $20
Thanksgiving/Easter: $10
Valentine's Day - Halloween: $5 or less

Well thank you very much. I don't know, I'll take the money though. Bottom line is there's nothing wrong with holidays but I hate the way American culture has warped them. Give me a pagan fertility fest, or African rain dance any day. Those are things that should be celebrated and revered, not fat men in red suits, or fluffy bunny rabbits. And I wanna have real celebrations like you mean it, not the mandatory dinner with the relatives. Drunken all night dance parties with hallucinogenic drugs: that's worship. Ceremonies involving ritualistic consumption of human flesh (Trisha's Paul had similar thoughts on turkey-day), especially brain tissue to pass knowledge from one generation to the next: that's kindred spriritualism. Halle-fucking-luya!