I can't help but think that this whole tradition of giving gifts at Christmas perhaps adds more stress to the holiday season than it should. I agree it's a very special thing to give somebody something they wanted but would not have otherwise gotten for themselves. I agree it is polite to reciprocate, and rude not to. I agree that this is not a time to be selfish with one's time or money. I care deeply about many people but have totally flaked out on gifts for all but the most essential. I was not able to devote as much time or concentration to gift-giving as it deserves, and instead sent a big Fuck You to the people most important to me. I feel absolutely rotten about it. Mea culpa.
To my coworkers, who have become my friends, I would not be at Artvoice if you weren't.
To the people who make up (e:strip), you have created a fun, eclectic, warped, and thoroughly enjoyable community just by being yourselves. It has been a pleasure and I wish I could be more involved.
To my friends, the fact that we have never really exchanged Christmas gifts is perhaps the greatest gift of all.
To my family, relax. I got you something.
To (e:dragonlady7), you'd think after spending so much of our lives together that I'd know exactly what you want. I don't, but I've got some ideas. We'll talk later.
Merry Christmas, everyone. Until next year,
- Z
Zobar's Journal
My Podcast Link
12/23/2007 20:54 #42629
it's really gotten to me this yearCategory: xmas
12/15/2007 18:31 #42527
what the cia won't tell youCategory: food
[The Culinary Institute of America]
The real reason you learn to make sauce Mornay ['cheese sauce'] is not for eggs Benedict, Welsh rabbit, or potatoes au gratin. The real reason you learn to make sauce Mornay is that you bought some foolishly expensive herbed, veined goat cheese to impress your girlfriend's parents at Thanksgiving, which they politely ate but did not finish, and now that it's nearly Christmas with no food in sight, you're fucking hungry and you don't care whether that's a 'delicate rind' or 'disgusting crust of mold.'
Sauce Mornay: because you paid too much for that cheese to admit it's gone bad.
- Z
The real reason you learn to make sauce Mornay ['cheese sauce'] is not for eggs Benedict, Welsh rabbit, or potatoes au gratin. The real reason you learn to make sauce Mornay is that you bought some foolishly expensive herbed, veined goat cheese to impress your girlfriend's parents at Thanksgiving, which they politely ate but did not finish, and now that it's nearly Christmas with no food in sight, you're fucking hungry and you don't care whether that's a 'delicate rind' or 'disgusting crust of mold.'
Sauce Mornay: because you paid too much for that cheese to admit it's gone bad.
- Z
jbeatty - 01/03/08 13:42
My only experience with scrapple was at a stuckey's in Northern Va. Probably why I'm not too fond of it. But I must try the pork roll.
My only experience with scrapple was at a stuckey's in Northern Va. Probably why I'm not too fond of it. But I must try the pork roll.
janelle - 01/03/08 12:54
Yuck. Pork rolls sound like scrapple.
Yuck. Pork rolls sound like scrapple.
zobar - 01/03/08 12:51
Pork rolls :::link::: are totally gross-looking but are actually pretty decent. As I recall it's very similar in taste and form to bologna [though it's a little chunkier], but it's used like peameal bacon [which is how it ended up on my 'jersey benedict' in the first place].
- Z
Pork rolls :::link::: are totally gross-looking but are actually pretty decent. As I recall it's very similar in taste and form to bologna [though it's a little chunkier], but it's used like peameal bacon [which is how it ended up on my 'jersey benedict' in the first place].
- Z
dragonlady7 - 01/03/08 11:49
Because the sort of person who eats old moldy cheese that's been sitting around too long is COMPLETELY the same demographic that has caviar all the time.
Because the sort of person who eats old moldy cheese that's been sitting around too long is COMPLETELY the same demographic that has caviar all the time.
jbeatty - 01/03/08 11:35
This post is making me hungry. Btw what is a pork roll?
This post is making me hungry. Btw what is a pork roll?
zobar - 01/03/08 11:24
If your eggs benedict come out tasting like cheesesteak, you really need to re-evaluate your life. I once made eggs benedict with Velveeta and something I have only ever seen in New Jersey called 'pork roll?' and it was definitely still somewhere along the benedict/mcmuffin axis.
That's not to say I have anything against hollandaise - it makes a wonderful sauce for, eg, fried smelt.
The thing about homemade vs store-bought mayo is that they're kind of totally different. Homemade is quite a bit thinner, more of a sauce that you spoon onto things, whereas store-bought really is better suited to spreading on sandwiches or putting on french fries. Believe it or not [and I cringe to say this], "reduced fat mayonnaise" actually tastes better than regular. I agree that mayo should be refrigerated in the store, if not for practical reasons then at least to give the impression that you're buying something perishable.
If I were invited to a party and the host said: "bring caviar," I'd probably go with blini, but I don't actually eat caviar either [unless you count tobiko on sushi]. Thing is, where I'm from people are not easily impressed and if you show up with beluga on toast points you're totally going to get pwn3d by just some really well-executed mini potato pancakes that cost less than two cents each to make. Rather than that, I'd tend to go with just real standard smoked salmon canapes - cream cheese, minibread, and some dill sprigs from the garden, if available. People totally scarf those and enjoy them, rather than eating them delicately and wondering silently whether they should be enjoying them more.
- Z
If your eggs benedict come out tasting like cheesesteak, you really need to re-evaluate your life. I once made eggs benedict with Velveeta and something I have only ever seen in New Jersey called 'pork roll?' and it was definitely still somewhere along the benedict/mcmuffin axis.
That's not to say I have anything against hollandaise - it makes a wonderful sauce for, eg, fried smelt.
The thing about homemade vs store-bought mayo is that they're kind of totally different. Homemade is quite a bit thinner, more of a sauce that you spoon onto things, whereas store-bought really is better suited to spreading on sandwiches or putting on french fries. Believe it or not [and I cringe to say this], "reduced fat mayonnaise" actually tastes better than regular. I agree that mayo should be refrigerated in the store, if not for practical reasons then at least to give the impression that you're buying something perishable.
If I were invited to a party and the host said: "bring caviar," I'd probably go with blini, but I don't actually eat caviar either [unless you count tobiko on sushi]. Thing is, where I'm from people are not easily impressed and if you show up with beluga on toast points you're totally going to get pwn3d by just some really well-executed mini potato pancakes that cost less than two cents each to make. Rather than that, I'd tend to go with just real standard smoked salmon canapes - cream cheese, minibread, and some dill sprigs from the garden, if available. People totally scarf those and enjoy them, rather than eating them delicately and wondering silently whether they should be enjoying them more.
- Z
jenks - 01/03/08 11:22
i'm with you Z. Sadly, good hollandaise is hard to find (but I don't understand why) It should be lemony and zingy, not just some bland yellow tasteless garbage.
i'm with you Z. Sadly, good hollandaise is hard to find (but I don't understand why) It should be lemony and zingy, not just some bland yellow tasteless garbage.
mrdt - 01/03/08 03:26
Hmm... I think I would stay far away from a restaurant that couldn't serve a proper hollandaise, let alone kept it festering all day in an enormous stock pot. That's probably why its seperated. Heat during the emulsification process will help the suspension stay together while being held in a steam well. You should try it and maybe someone will say 'Hey this guy really knows what he's doing in the kitchen.' And your benedicts won't taste like a philly cheese steak. Lol.
It worries me that you don't buy mayo in the refrigerated section of the grocery store. Imagine it sitting on the shelf for months or years before some sorry sap walks into Wilson Farms to pick up his favorite condiment for the ol' classic turkey club. Personally I make my own in about 2 minutes using this tiny B&D food processor and people say 'Hey take my money and show me how to do that!'
No toast points? Do you prefer your Beluga straight up or what? Personally I'm a crackers guy.
Hmm... I think I would stay far away from a restaurant that couldn't serve a proper hollandaise, let alone kept it festering all day in an enormous stock pot. That's probably why its seperated. Heat during the emulsification process will help the suspension stay together while being held in a steam well. You should try it and maybe someone will say 'Hey this guy really knows what he's doing in the kitchen.' And your benedicts won't taste like a philly cheese steak. Lol.
It worries me that you don't buy mayo in the refrigerated section of the grocery store. Imagine it sitting on the shelf for months or years before some sorry sap walks into Wilson Farms to pick up his favorite condiment for the ol' classic turkey club. Personally I make my own in about 2 minutes using this tiny B&D food processor and people say 'Hey take my money and show me how to do that!'
No toast points? Do you prefer your Beluga straight up or what? Personally I'm a crackers guy.
zobar - 01/02/08 23:09
Hollandaise _used_ to go on eggs benedict, until I'd had enough of restaurants totally ruining the experience with that separated oily runny crap that you know has been festering tepid in a huge stock pot for way longer than is reasonable. When I make eggs benedict, I go with a sharp cheddar sauce, with just a little bit of american [yup]. And everybody goes: 'Hey! This is like eggs benedict, only instead of being terribly depressing it's something I actually enjoy eating!'
I wouldn't eat _any_ cheese on "toast points" because "toast points" is something Martha Stewart does, and she's a ridiculous human being.
But the whole point of the post is that blue cheese is milk that has been forgotten about so long that it is neither fluid nor particularly white, and if you're looking at the thing and trying to tell how much of the mold is P roqueforti and how much is R stolonifer ... you really need to get a grip. If it still smells basically like moldy cheese, which is what it is, and there's nothing else in the house, which there isn't, chuck it in a pot and boil it.
- Z
Hollandaise _used_ to go on eggs benedict, until I'd had enough of restaurants totally ruining the experience with that separated oily runny crap that you know has been festering tepid in a huge stock pot for way longer than is reasonable. When I make eggs benedict, I go with a sharp cheddar sauce, with just a little bit of american [yup]. And everybody goes: 'Hey! This is like eggs benedict, only instead of being terribly depressing it's something I actually enjoy eating!'
I wouldn't eat _any_ cheese on "toast points" because "toast points" is something Martha Stewart does, and she's a ridiculous human being.
But the whole point of the post is that blue cheese is milk that has been forgotten about so long that it is neither fluid nor particularly white, and if you're looking at the thing and trying to tell how much of the mold is P roqueforti and how much is R stolonifer ... you really need to get a grip. If it still smells basically like moldy cheese, which is what it is, and there's nothing else in the house, which there isn't, chuck it in a pot and boil it.
- Z
mrdt - 01/02/08 21:33
Hollandaise goes on eggs benedict and if you wouldn't eat the cheese straight up on say some toast points or something why would you make a sauce out of it???
Hollandaise goes on eggs benedict and if you wouldn't eat the cheese straight up on say some toast points or something why would you make a sauce out of it???
drew - 12/16/07 07:06
yeah. I never have this problem 'cause I would never have leftover cheese.
yeah. I never have this problem 'cause I would never have leftover cheese.
dragonlady7 - 12/16/07 00:47
Hey, you've never done a thing to impress my folks. You've never had to, they irrationally adore you beyond all reckoning.
And that was good cheese, but we ran out of crackers.
But it was really good on the macaroni too...
Hey, you've never done a thing to impress my folks. You've never had to, they irrationally adore you beyond all reckoning.
And that was good cheese, but we ran out of crackers.
But it was really good on the macaroni too...
james - 12/15/07 19:15
I am a big fan of so called 'garbage cheese'
I mean, it is rotten milk, how much worse can it get?
I am a big fan of so called 'garbage cheese'
I mean, it is rotten milk, how much worse can it get?
12/13/2007 23:16 #42509
in swedishCategory: tidbit
'television static' translates to 'myrornas krig,' or 'battle of the ants.'
- Z
- Z
jenks - 12/18/07 22:47
Tiny, I wonder what the french phrase is for when you sit in your car later and smack yourself in the head when you come up with the PERFECT COMEBACK that you SHOULD have said, instead of the "ummmmmm YOUR MOM" that you mumbled frantically.
Tiny, I wonder what the french phrase is for when you sit in your car later and smack yourself in the head when you come up with the PERFECT COMEBACK that you SHOULD have said, instead of the "ummmmmm YOUR MOM" that you mumbled frantically.
tinypliny - 12/14/07 00:17
Ooohh, that is so kool. Kind of looks like it too. Never thought about it!
So now when I spray vinegar all over my kitchen nooks and crannies, I can do my death dance and chant krrigs, you are being riggged. Or wait, is it myrornas which means "ants"? That would so defeat the rhyme. :/
You know, I heard something like this recently. I forget where. If you are at a party and someone says something clever, and you are left at a loss for words, and then just as you are leaving the party and hovering over the staircase leading out, you think of a riposte, it's called esprit d'escalier, which means "The wit of the staircase" in French. So it's an answer thought up too late. Some European languages are so visual-driven, it's amazing.
Ooohh, that is so kool. Kind of looks like it too. Never thought about it!
So now when I spray vinegar all over my kitchen nooks and crannies, I can do my death dance and chant krrigs, you are being riggged. Or wait, is it myrornas which means "ants"? That would so defeat the rhyme. :/
You know, I heard something like this recently. I forget where. If you are at a party and someone says something clever, and you are left at a loss for words, and then just as you are leaving the party and hovering over the staircase leading out, you think of a riposte, it's called esprit d'escalier, which means "The wit of the staircase" in French. So it's an answer thought up too late. Some European languages are so visual-driven, it's amazing.
11/30/2007 09:38 #42339
'gay bowel syndrome?'Category: politics
Has the American conservative movement lost its focus? According to the statistics page 
from 'Conservapedia: The Trustworthy Encyclopedia,' it seems as though American conservatives are just as preoccupied focused as ever.
- Z
from 'Conservapedia: The Trustworthy Encyclopedia,' it seems as though American conservatives are just as - Z
libertad - 11/30/07 21:15
Check out this fascinating read. I can't wait to start a book club! :::link:::
Check out this fascinating read. I can't wait to start a book club! :::link:::
james - 11/30/07 17:25
god damn it. Can't we all just have a big orgy and get all this over with?
That was directed at the scary conservatives, not you all who posted or left comments. Just to be clear.
god damn it. Can't we all just have a big orgy and get all this over with?
That was directed at the scary conservatives, not you all who posted or left comments. Just to be clear.
jason - 11/30/07 16:22
Gay Bowel Syndrome is not a Conservapedia invention, or even a conservative invention, although why they still call it that is beyond weird.
Gay Bowel Syndrome is not a Conservapedia invention, or even a conservative invention, although why they still call it that is beyond weird.
jim - 11/30/07 12:23
Gay Obsession Syndrome is more like it.
Gay Obsession Syndrome is more like it.
carolinian - 11/30/07 12:15
"The fossil record does not support the theory of evolution."
Taken from :::link:::
Make your own judgement.
"The fossil record does not support the theory of evolution."
Taken from :::link:::
Make your own judgement.
drew - 11/30/07 10:07
hahahahaha. I can't believe that they made their stats public.
hahahahaha. I can't believe that they made their stats public.
11/27/2007 21:12 #42309
are you man enough for thisCategory: a series of tubes
OK, I admit to being a webcomics geek, and a tagline of 'Poorly-drawn cartoons inspired by actual spam subject lines' sounds like the kind of thing that's already been done a bajillion times before. But when faced with 'Are you man enough for this,' Steven Frank of Spamusement came up with 'Derek Jeter, carrying a fishing pole and a keg, atop a riding lawnmower on the flatbed of a pickup, deep-fried and smothered with country gravy.'
That is unusual talent.
- Z
That is unusual talent.
- Z
This my sound kinda strange but one thing that I think might make the holiday less stressful is some good ads. When I mean good I don't mean clever or funny I mean ads that remind you that most of us just buy things that no one needs at christmas they are wants. Take those best buy ads with the blue box for example. What if in the end instead of finding there gifts in the attic they find (great just used a bad example of an ad) The Toys for Teens gifts instead. Yes best buy does do a Toys for teens promotion like toys for tots but you never see an ad and if you don't pay real close attention you might not even know. I will admit i meant to give to at least 3 good causes and never really gave to any of them. I kinda ran out of money cause I was selfish. I didn't mean to be. I think if there where more ads that reminded people that there are kids who really don't have a christmas or it is seeing the other people at the shelter who also need warm clothes then I think that would stop the chtistmas obsession with gifts. It might also help people who need the help more then we need our gifts. I know some people think that the poor and the homeless are there because of bad things or choices they made and that might be true. But in that case why not go out a resuce a dog or cat that someone else didn't want. I'm not saying to give a pet as a gift that is a bad Idea for a surprise it really is that just leads to more mis treated animals. In any event Merry Christmas.
:::link:::