05/03/04 04:15 - ID#35234
Better, but could use a drink
SO, I have a lot to do including the whole cleaning apartment thing. Really people, how important is it for our mentality? And really, who wants to do this for me? It only pertains to folding clothes, which I loathe doing.
I'm really close to getting another tattoo because I have to go in anyway for a touch up. It'll be small, but am I doing the eating because I'm bored thing?
So I have everything to do today and I don't want to start. So I will watch a movie. Anyone feel like getting a drink tonight? No that's bad, but seriously . . . I've had a rough couple of days.
My arms feel like they are going to bust out of my skin because of the ride yesterday. I need drugs, or again, a drink.
Yeah okay, gotta go. Thanks again Paul.
Oh and by the way, speaking of clothes Lilho, I was naked the entire time I wrote this HA-HA! And y'all didn't even know . . . Oh shit the door
Permalink: Better_but_could_use_a_drink.html
Words: 203
Location: Buffalo, NY
05/02/04 10:39 - ID#35233
worms
thanks paul I'll try that, but everytime I try it, the computer boots me off. I'm fucked.
Permalink: worms.html
Words: 21
Location: Buffalo, NY
05/02/04 08:48 - ID#35232
PAUL! YOU WOULD KNOW THIS! HELP!
Oh, okay, more info . . . um, there's a window that pops up closing the LSA Shell (export version). What the hell is that? I click, don't send report and then a minute or two later, the thing shuts down by itself! Would you or anyone know anything about this bullshit!
HELP!
Permalink: PAUL_YOU_WOULD_KNOW_THIS_HELP_.html
Words: 64
Location: Buffalo, NY
05/02/04 08:43 - ID#35231
Ma weekend in the rain
So after a very refreshing meal, not thirst quenching so much as - that was just a good time, I went back home, saw the rain cloud looming over Buffalo and ran around like a teenager hiding weed. I dropped the Billy off at the ex's (the friend thing is working, although I know the hammer will fall any day now)and rode away in the rain.
I won't get into details about the weekend other than I made my nephew the coolest kid in school by riding to (because we were late) his first communion/conformation on the bike and parking right in front of the church. He jumped off and it felt good to say, now where, rockstar . . .
I saw my sister start to smoke again because her son's father is a dick, and she was freaked out when I asked her for the cigarette, inhaled, blew the smoke out my nostrils and walked away. I said, yeah Kath, there are some things you might not know about me, as I, you. With that exception, let's keep it that way. You have to understand, being the youngest of three sisters, I was watched growning up. And rightly so, and I love them for it. But now . . .
So anyway, it was fast, and I left this morning praying that the rain would hold off. It did, and I started to make incredible time. I was jamming to "I've Been Waiting for a Girl Like You," to make me believe I was in the middle of an 80's movie (which worked) when I saw the cloud.
I was about an hour and a half away - Dansville - when I thought, no rain gear needed, it's just sprinkling, I'm almost home.
What a horrible, horrible, stupid decision. I'm still cold and have every sweat I could find on right now. And my bike started getting pissed at the end because it too started to shiver (too much water in the carbs or bad gas, I don't know). But of course I made a promise to God that I would give it a look see tomorrow, if it would just get me home.
And here I am. That is of course after a scare with a potential virus. Fucking computer. Well, at least we'll get sick together.
Oh and by the way, Fisher-Price isn't bad. It's not them . . . it's me. It's just that the time was wrong.
I too, should clean my apartment. Um I'll get the beer, and y'all can help. We'll make it a game. Whaddya say?
Permalink: Ma_weekend_in_the_rain.html
Words: 499
Location: Buffalo, NY
04/29/04 01:38 - ID#35230
Ah whatever.
Okay it passed. Well look I had a phenominal day which included me talking to the VP of F-P describing Camus' ideas of absurdity, as analagous to a working corporate America. I hope I get some work out of it.
And then I saw my buddy with his girlfriend and lost all hope that indivuality can occur in a relationship. Oh I remember being there. It's great, but it blows. Imagine a healthy relationship? I can't at this point, although me and chapter 19 are hitting it off pretty well.
I shake my head at stupid boys who would rather lose who they are than find out who they might be. Fuck it.
funny journal entry forthcoming.
Anyone else feel like screaming or taking a run or walking down the middle of elmwood? I'm here and I do have a jacket for the winter-like weather.
hey, let me know.
I would really like a goddamn cigarette. Whiskey is no longer working.
Permalink: Ah_whatever_.html
Words: 180
Location: Buffalo, NY
04/27/04 09:25 - ID#35229
For in that sleep...what dreams may come
I did not get up early despite ample opportunities. I didn't get up late, but not early either.
But what's more, I dreamt last night. Oh my God did I dream. And guess what came back . . . yes, horrific tidal wave dreams. It was amazing. I haven't had those in I don't even know when.The only thing I do know is that something is wrong when I have those dreams. So what's wrong?
Ironically, I was fishing when the waves started to come in. Does that mean that I wanted them to come back, subconsciously?
I'm going to work sans coffee. I ran out of filters.
Life is so hard sometimes
Permalink: For_in_that_sleep_what_dreams_may_come.html
Words: 127
Location: Buffalo, NY
04/26/04 11:51 - ID#35228
New Plan, for tonight
I'm going to go to bed early. Right after I'm done typing. I've been falling asleep everywhere lately, and I'm hoping this will cure it. More of a problem is the complete opposition my body has to waking up. In either case, let it be known, I will sleep soon.
Oh yes. This is an experiment. I will attempt to wake up at 7am tomorrow morning and take a walk with me dog to get a cup of coffee and potentially read a book before I have to work. We shall see if this works.
It's sort of like when you were a kid playing basketball, even though people without hands were better than you, and you said, I'll ask her/him out if I make this shot. It's come down to that.
If this doesn't work, I will boycott sleep all together. Who's with me . . .
Would it be too much to ask for a small bout with insomnia?
Permalink: New_Plan_for_tonight.html
Words: 165
Location: Buffalo, NY
04/26/04 02:52 - ID#35227
2nd, 3rd, 1st
wake up you have stuff to do. You know you want to get it out, but the sleep wants you. But hell, like it matters. wake up.
As he says this to himself, head bobbing over the keyboard, rain falling, cars whizzing by, sirens wailing, the phone rings. He thinks it's her, but of course it's Greg.
I'm in love.
Really.
I think so.
That's great man. I think, well no . . .
Shit no parking spots can I call you back.
Call me tomorrow. Thanks brother, you did it.
Did what.
I'm awake.
You in love?
That depends. I have to write. It's a good night for it.
I found a spot.
Me too.
Permalink: 2nd_3rd_1st.html
Words: 115
Location: Buffalo, NY
04/24/04 02:23 - ID#35226
Where Have All the Tidal Waves Gone?
That Tears for Fears song is true though, "I think it's kind of funny, I think it's kind of sad, the dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had."
If you've ever came face to face with a 40 foot tidal wave about to drop on you, you know how alive you feel in your sleep. I can't describe the feeling.
God I miss those days.
Well . . . there's always tonight.
Permalink: Where_Have_All_the_Tidal_Waves_Gone_.html
Words: 140
Location: Buffalo, NY
04/23/04 03:28 - ID#35225
Okay VS. Amazing
Knowing full well that, yes, this might be fun, but ultimately, it won't be the storybook romance you think will eventually happen, do you ride out that boat until you see the one you're supposed to be on? Well then what us that point of dating? It definitely befuddles the mind.
I like you.
Okay.
Let's go out.
Okay.
We're okay together.
Okay.
What's wrong.
It's okay.
I can't do okay, this I have realized. But do you do okay until you trip over amazing?
Has anyone seen amazing around?
And don't say everyone is, because it's all a matter of perspective.
And where does "good" come into play?
Permalink: Okay_VS_Amazing.html
Words: 175
Location: Buffalo, NY
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