Skip to the posts
Buffalo's neighborhood journals since 2003 🌱 Plant🌶️ Spice

pmrk’s journal

Dear Congress

· 🌡️ 0°F

Dear Congress

May I have a bailout? I don't need nearly as much as you have been giving out and I won't fly in to ask for money on a private jet or even in coach; if you need my request in writing I will send it via USPS and pay for the stamp out of my own pocket.

Once you give me the money, I will not hoard it or throw lavish parties or take a spa vacation.

I have a spending plan all set too.

We can work out the exact details since it is smarter to pay off high interest credit cards first but it would go something like this:

Pay off mortgage.
Pay off car.
Pay off student loans.
Pay off credit cards - we only have 2.
Pay back my mom.

I promise I will stimulate our local and national economy and save for the future too. I have a plan for that as well; once again it's simple but I can see it working out really well for everyone.

We're going to save more than we spend but we'll spend as we know the importance of consumer spending and we'll continue to support local charities.

We'll buy some new stuff from local stores and bigger national chains - but not from Wal-Mart. Hope that is not a deal breaker but I'm just not a fan.

We'll go visit some friends and family in other parts of the country and buy some stuff where they live too, I doubt we'll stay in hotels for every visit since we want to stay with our friends and family but we'll go out for dinner at least once per trip.

We'll pay my husbands school tuition and not take out any student loans and in a couple years he will re-enter the workforce as a teacher. He already has plans to teach in a high demand area such as the inner city.

We'll be sure to set aside money for his children to attend college or trade school so they'll be able to get good paying jobs and add to the tax revenue.

Just ask the IRS for our address, they have it as we have been loyal tax payers for a while now.

Thanks in advance!


378 words

💬 4 comments

  1. gardenmama ·

    I would like to sign up for this bailout also. No doubt we'd all do a better job with the funds than the banks, brokers, auto industry...

  2. imk2 ·

    Hey I took yours and tweaked it a bit (I hope you don't mind my plagarism) and actually sent it my Repressentative and to Hillary Clinton.

    The begining is pretty much yours, the end is where I added stuff. I kept the Walmart bit b/c I am not much of a fan as well.

    Dear Senator Clinton,

    May I have a bailout? I don't need nearly as much as you have been giving out and I won't fly in to ask for money on a private jet or even in coach; if you need my request in writing I will send it via USPS and pay for the stamp out of my own pocket.

    Once you give me the money, I will not hoard it or throw lavish parties or take a spa vacation.

    I have a spending plan all set too.

    We can work out the exact details since it is smarter to pay off high interest credit cards first but it would go something like this:

    Pay off mortgage.
    Pay off car.
    Pay off student loans.
    Pay off credit cards - we only have 2.
    Pay back my mom.

    I promise I will stimulate our local and national economy and save for the future too. I have a plan for that as well; once again it's simple but I can see it working out really well for everyone.

    We're going to save more than we spend but we'll spend as we know the importance of consumer spending and we'll continue to support local charities.

    We'll buy some new stuff from local stores and bigger national chains - but not from Wal-Mart. Hope that is not a deal breaker but I'm just not a fan.

    We'll go visit some friends and family in other parts of the country and buy some stuff where they live as well, and eat dinner in restaurants. (not too fancy, no need being so frivolous in a time of need)

    We'll pay my staggering school loans and current school tuition and will finally be able to not take out future student loans that I can't afford to pay. My education will be used to better society.

    We'll be sure to set aside money for my daughter to attend college so she'll be able to get a good paying job and add to the tax revenue.

    Just ask the IRS, I have been a loyal tax payer since the age of 14!

    I promise I don't require billions, and I'll never use your money to take my friends on some swanky retreat. Let their Senators worry about them.

    I look forward to striking a deal that won't embarrass you or make you look as if you've been duped.


    P.S. To make the PR for this deal even better you should also know that:

    1. I was a teen mom
    2. Baby daddy was murdered (back in '93 when gang violence was all the rage)
    3. Daughter of an immigrant (legal of course!)
    4. Father died of lung cancer (not sure if this one helps, but surely it can't hurt)
    5. Put my self through college (without stripping or escorting!)
    6. I am a liberal (I would never expect you to be so generous to some hillbilly republican who doesn't know a good government program even if it hits him in the face)
    7. I cure cancer for a living (come on, it can't get any better than this?)

    You can refer to me as "Yvonne the Second Generation, Single, Teen, Working to Cure Cancer, Mother"

  3. imk2 ·

    i got this reply so far

    Thank you for your e-mail. It is very important to me to know the issues that are of concern to you. A growing number of my constituents are now choosing to communicate with me via e-mail. I hope you will understand that, because of the volume and range of e-mails I receive, it can take some time to send a response that specifically addresses the subject raised in your message. I do, however, want to let you know immediately that your message has been received. Hearing from you and others through e-mail helps me to quickly learn the views and interests of New Yorkers and others, which is very helpful to me in my work in the United States Senate. I hope you will continue to monitor my work through my website at :::link::: and I welcome hearing from you.

    Sincerely,

    Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton

  4. pmrk ·

    @imk2 glad you liked enough to use it. I may just send it off to my Representatives and Hillary. I agree on the not too frivolous of restaurants part, it was a good revision.

    e:gardenmamma I agree that those of who have to pay bills would spend the money wisely. I think if our government had single parent households in charge of budgets we'd have a balanced and frugal budget.

💬 Write a comment